Communication Myths and Misinformation | Ep 24

There’s a trend these days for: setting boundaries; sticking up yourself; letting people know they’re crossing a line that’s not OK with you; telling people if they’re asking for something that’s over-the-top or too much. This can be a good thing, because we need to make sure that we can take care of ourselves, both mentally physically and emotionally.And if we’re constantly saying yes to everyone else it usually means were mostly saying no to ourselves. But there’s a side-effect from this. Relationships are being damaged. It’s not because we've finally decided to set boundaries or to ask for what we need. It’s because when we finally decide to say something, we do it wrong. We don’t know how.We step into it and run around like a bull in a china closet, leaving a bunch of smashed glass behind us.And then we walk away leaving the other person to pick it all up, wondering what just happened. There’s a lot of talk in the media about speaking up for yourself, but not a lot of talk about how to do it well. And although it can and should be liberating, I’m seeing some of the negative consequences on the other side of that.Lately I'm finding myself more frequently helping people explore how to set boundaries, or change dynamics of a relationship, while keeping the relationship in-tact.You can move out of silence into speaking out for yourself in a way that preserves your relationships from trauma, saves your reputation at work, saves your job, and even help those relationships get better, whether they be in family life, social life, or at work.You can skip the part where you leave a mess.Specifically we’ll cover 3 of the most dangerous traps people fall into when they’re speaking up for themselves: Speaking with angerMaking assumptionsWaiting too long to speakAdditional, helpful episodes: Episode 5Episode 11Episode 21Link to questions download PDF: https://www.lucigabel.com/pl/2148418244