Comparing Yourself

Comparing yourself all the time? Tired of feeling like you never quite measure up...no matter how much you accomplish? It's not just YOU! Discover the sneaky specific ways self-comparison shows up for perfectionists, the difference between self-awareness + self-coaching, why self-comparison is not your fault but is your responsibility to change.  On paper, you’ve got it together— isn’t it time you felt like it? Whether it's becoming much more DECISIVE in everything you do, stop playing out worst case scenarios in your head or becoming JOYFULLY PRESENT AMBITIOUS again, Perfectionism Optimized, private 1-1 coaching gives you the life-long skills to *finally feel* as amazing on the inside as your life looks on the outside. Get your stress-free start today at https://courtneylovegavin.com/rewireTIMESTAMPS:00:00-How you can stop comparing yourself to others02:32-The Annoying Problem with Surface-Level Self Comparison Tips03:46-Self Awareness vs. Self Coaching: What's the Difference?05:34-Dangers of DIY Approaches to Rewiring Perfectionism07:25-Why “How To Stop COmparing Yourself To Others” tips backfire for perfectionists12:10-Comparing Insides to Outsides Never Adds Up14:13-Moving the goalposts17:49-Punishment vs. Discipline: Changing Behaviors without Pain19:31-Understanding the Why Behind Your Perfectionistic TendenciesResources Mentioned In Episode 245:Perfect Start Introductory Session Single Coaching SessionBe Proud of Yourself Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 237Chasing Validation Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 236Proving Yourself At Work Perfectionism Rewired Ep. 232Citations/Sources:McCarthy, P. A., Meyer, T., Back, M. D., & Morina, N. (2023). How we compare: A new approach to assess aspects of the comparison process for appearance-based standards and their associations with individual differences in wellbeing and personality measures. PLOS ONE, 18(1), e0280072–e0280072. https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0280072White, J. B., Langer, E. J., Yariv, L., & Welch, J. C. (2006). Frequent Social Comparisons and Destructive Emotions and Behaviors: The Dark Side of Social Comparisons. Journal of Adult Development, 13(1), 36–44. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10804-006-9005-0Zhou, Y., Yang, Y., Jiang, H., & Guo, C. (2025). Self-comparison versus social-comparison: The impact of imperfection on executive function in perfectionists. Personality and Individual Differences, 234, 112965. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.paid.2024.112965‌‌ Perfectionism Rewired is committed to truth and accuracy through a perfectionist affirming lens, offering cutting-edge research on perfectionism, interoception + neuroscience, for the practical perfectionist who wants to enjoy the life they've worked so hard to create.