A safer Ontario means more police and prosecutors making sure my car doesn't get stolen. It means building new jails to keep criminals behind bars. And it means there's no need to wear me when I play at the park. We're making every corner of Ontario safer to make all of Ontario safer.
That's how we protect Ontario. For all of us. Learn how at ontario.ca.ca. Pay for by the Government of Ontario.
This episode is brought to you by Octavia. You might already be eating yogurt, but not all yogurts are created equal. Octavia contains over 1 billion probiotics per serving to survive and reach the gut alive. When it comes to gut health, Octavia is the number one family doctor recommended probiotic yogurt brand.
Choose Octavia. Be good from the inside out. Visit Octavia.ca for more details. Hear that?
It's your money calling. It wants a promotion. Elevate your savings with the Scotia High Interest Savings Account. Always earn high regular interest rates that grow the more you save and invest.
Conditions apply. Visit www.scoshabank.com. To learn more, Scoshabank, you're richer than you think. We're back with another episode of Horror Movie Night and Kyle, you had us watch Crocodile from the year 2000.
To talk about this film from 2000, 25 years, I found this great quote producer Frank Demartina said that with Crocodile, director Toby Hooper was going to try to recapture the fright of the Texas Chainsaw Massacre. And Hooper agreed saying, it's the 25th anniversary of the first Chainsaw Movie and I really want to create an atmosphere that will wind up just how that movie did. And I think he nailed it everybody. I think that was as crocodile carries a lot of TCN energy for Peter's.
Here's what I'm going to legitimately say and then you'll dive into this. My expectations for this movie were already pretty in the toilet. Right. Why is that?
Why is that? I went in expecting it to be really bad. And then it starts and it's got this very undeniable late 80s or late 90s, early 2000s like music acting like all of it. And I was like, all right, this is pretty bad, but whatever.
But if I'm going to give a compliment, what I will say is I truly thought that this was a film that was entirely CGI crocodile. Yeah. Now, the scenes where it is CGI crocodile are very unfortunate. Yes.
The practical crocodile that they use throughout this movie, kind of dope. Like I was not they use it a lot. I was not expecting that. I really thought that this was going to be like an early 2000s sci-fi made for TV movie where you've got, yes, that horrendous CGI abomination that's behind Kyle.
If you're watching the video, it looks like it's not done rendering. It looks like a fine, like a fine cut. Like it's missing one, one different department from the heart. Yeah.
It's been a the disparagingness between that CGI shark and the practical effect is. There's one scene where it has roadrunner legs. Yes. I swear you got it.
Roadrunner legs through the dark woods. It's the first time we see the CGI crock and it does this. Like it does the sound effect doesn't happen. But I swear if you watch it, you'll know often your head.
It's exactly what happens. It is. There is a point halfway through this movie where I was like, would I actively own this movie and put it on? No.
But if I was like, I walked into someone's house and they were already watching crocodile, I would plop down on the couch and keep watching it. Like it's not the fuck. It's not the like in the grand scheme of shit that we have watched for this show. This is so middle of the road to be.
Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I just want to take this over and watch this as long term six.
You know what I mean? Like, yeah, no. Yeah. No, I mean, here's the thing is that what saves this movie is the 2000s.
It is it is using you. If you're 40, you will like watching this movie one time. That's what I'm going to say is it's not like it's not good. It's not a good movie.
Like I like no bones about it. It's a bad movie. But the characters are so laughably absurd and the outfits. And just everything.
And then you add this like extra skin over top of it. That it's Toby Hooper. Yeah. And it's there is something undeniably fun about it.
Yeah. It's again, it is not a masterpiece by any stretch of the imagination. But I really went into this expecting to hate every second of my watch and was like pleasantly surprised that this was as two and a half star of a two and a half star movie. Yeah.
Yeah. It's very pleasant. You know, so a few and about a month ago now we were talking actresses three being from 1990, but feeling so late 80s, right? Like for having having a big 80s feel to it.
This does undeniably feel like it sort of kicks off the year 2000. So it's still like, why is it too gay? I'm going to push back on that just a little bit. OK.
And I think that because this is 2000, it's it reminds me that the 2000s really didn't start until September 11th. Like like 2000, all of 2000 and most of 2001 still feel like an extension of the 90s to me where like 2001 is September 11th is where there's this definitive break from the bright colors and good times of the 90s. And it's like, I think that a large show. I think we forget this.
But a large chunk of the 2000s is like way more beige colored entertainment. Oh, yeah. Yeah. You know, I mean, like this still has the bright optimism of the late 90s.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. OK, no, that's that's very fair.
That is a very interesting place to climb an aisle on the timeline. I think you're right. But this is my second to be Hooper pick this year. We put the man.
Where am I? This against the man. I think it's beneath the man. But not by much.
Much. And they both have a very crazy energy to them. One hundred different ways for sure. Yes.
This one has an eight character cast crazy energy. Yeah. You know, we are. And the man is an ambitious energy.
Like, wow, they really are going hard for this concept. Right. Right. Like you have the Stephen Kingness of it all.
You have like some really great character actors. This is I don't know what's going on here, Dog. But this is this is a crocodile from 2000. Also not for nothing.
This is his follow up to the man. No way. He had a five year break. It's a big movie.
I love how he's like, oh, I spent five years. I need to let me do any of palate cleanser. Man, we really we've really dove in. Well, I'm looking at this right now.
We have covered almost every Toby Hooper. The movies that we have not covered from Toby Hooper. And I don't even know if we count these first this first one, eggshells. I don't know what eggshells is from 69.
We haven't done the first Texas Chainsaw Massacre. We probably never will. We've done it in the live. We've done Fun House.
We haven't done Poltergeist, but we've done Life Force. We haven't done Invaders from Mars, but we have done. Yes. Haven't we?
I know that we I've watched it for you. I maybe that was a Reddit hard club one forever ago, but we have not released Invaders from Mars episode. We did do the Texas Chainsaw Massacre, too. I've never heard of spontaneous combustion.
But then it's not a list. We can actually get episode out of it. It's got Brad Doreph in it. But then we have done Night Terror's, The Mangular, and now Crocodile.
And then the last three that he did was Toolbox Murders, which we haven't done, but I'm sure we will eventually. Mortuary and Jin, which I've never heard of any of those last three. But I remember buying Toolbox Murders when I was on my Rob Zombie Kick. And I was like, oh, Sherry Moon Zombie has a cameo in it.
Great. And I think I bet that's why I bought it. It's not Angela Bettis isn't it though. Mortuary, I have seen.
Oh, that's right. Fine. Not seen Jin. But we could definitely get a solid episode of Toolbox Murders.
And definitely invaded from Mars. Yeah. I'm just saying, it's insane how much of his catalog we've actually already covered on this show. For sort of an inconsistent direct.
Well, incredibly inconsistent. No, like that. Insanely inconsistent. I mean, I am a stronger defender of, you know, live than anyone else here.
But I mean, when you're really looking at it, I would argue that the man has three and a half true home runs in him. Like the original Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Texas Chainsaw Massacre part two, the Fun House, and then determining who you think directed it. The older guys are like the four like undeniable. These are great movies.
And then the rest are just like they fit a mood. Not sure if it's the mood I want, but it fits a mood. It's certainly fits. It's certainly fits horror movie nights, general vibe.
You know, more than a West Craven, more than a John Carpenter. Toby Hooper really is the horror movie night. It's the one we covered most, right? He has to be.
He has to be up there. There's no one else that could be that could come even close to that. Like that is insane. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven.
We've done seven of his 12 movies. Yeah. Even if it's not close. Well, there's got it there.
I mean, we have not done that many carpenters for sure. And so we have not done seven John Carpenter movies. I know we've done seven West Craven movies. He would be the only other one who was Charlie in the company.
Charlie Bann. Like Charlie Bann? Well, Charlie Bann's a whole other piece. Because there's stuff he's like introduced.
So that becomes a good argument, man. Yeah. That is the really the voice of reason today, isn't it? That's the hey, I've always been the voice of reason.
Anyway, let's open some cans and talk about this damn movie. Yeah, we're going to get on the boat, baby! I didn't have a Corona, which would have been probably what I had been for this. No, Corona.
But my Bud Light next, it takes on a whole other meaning that's being the next film after the manger that I picked earlier. So my Bud Light next is just a very light, easy drinking boat beer. What do you got, Scott? Sorry, guys.
I'm out for trout today. Oh, other half. I need to zoom in on that. Because what?
Is that a cartoon fish on that can? It's actually a trout. It's a fish catching man. It's raining.
You're blood on. Also, wearing my fishing is a re-shirt. So yeah, this is all planned out, my guys. Very nice.
Very nice. I love it. Who knows this shit? The man works out of beer distributor.
He's got a close enough in proximity that I, and there are more than 10 years that I expect. They're from 12% brewing, who distributes? Anyway, you don't need to know all that. Great beer.
And not mine is not. But that's OK. It's for the last. The name of it is literally just to say what you drink it and you're like, well, that was terrible.
Next, and then you get something good, right? I was going to say I didn't realize that Bud Light was doing their Pepsi in the mid 90s. And you're like, this is Pepsi next. I'm going to put him on glass.
But this is my co-host on Pod Brothers. This is his go-to just like crushing beers beer, which is why I had one in my fridge and I hadn't worked. That's really tracks. That's completely shocking information.
Yeah. I'm going to try and give him some. We're trying to get Pod for the next. The sponsor Pod for the next.
That's going to happen. Anything's possible, baby. I believe in you. All right, so why this movie?
And then walk us through the plot. Well, I kind of forgot that this takes place during Memorial Day. So my bad on the timing there. We're a little late.
But it's just after 4th of July, you might be doing summary things. But eight-ish friends all go to a lake for Memorial Day weekend. And this is like your this is a grab bag of personalities. You got a douchebag friend, Duncan.
You got a slutty friend named Sonny. You got a friend with a dog, Annabelle, and Princess, respectively. And then our main couple, Brady and Claire, with a couple other names, Sprinkle and Claire, is like a new girlfriend. She's a newbie to the whole situation.
Brady has other dynamics with everyone involved. Everyone seems to hate Claire. And we're just going on this lake that I keep calling it a house boat. It's not.
It's some sort of like. It's pontoon boat, isn't it? Pontoon boat. Thank you.
I want to say a platoon boat. And that's not where I work. It's a platonic boat. That's why I say it's a platonic boat.
Nobody's fucking. Nobody's fucking. Everybody wants to fuck. Nobody's fucking including Brady and Claire.
They try. And it doesn't happen on that first night. Duncan. Don't give him this.
Yeah. And he's got you know he's you know he's a cock block and douche bag because he's got this the chunkiest red streak. Oh man, I love his hair. I made a note about how great his hair was.
And he's got those like those sunglasses that are the fake that the plastic is supposed to look like metal. And then they've got like the holes along the sides of the head. If he was not in good Charlotte, you know. He gives off that vibe.
He feels like they got rid of him before they put out the anthem and then just like never made it back. Like he was fired. And yeah, those are the cheapest sunglasses, but they have that late 90s, early 2000s look. Such a vibe.
Duncan is a hoot. Sleddy friend, Sonny also has a lot of colors in her hair. Yeah. She gets a bad rap.
I feel bad for Sonny a lot of the time here. But she gets her come up and is later on. So they go on this platoon boat. They they go out.
They camp offshore for a night. And nearby some hillbilly hunters destroy a nest of crocodile eggs, which totally seals their fate. The crock of ours, one of them. And then chomps the other in half before pushing their car into a lake as it to cover up the crocodiles crying.
Yeah, cock it on murder. That's man. This movie is so dumb. And I really, really enjoyed that about it.
Like I was watching it. I was I was like, Matt, I was my expectations were in hell. And it surpassed the expectations. Like it wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be because it's so fucking dumb.
Yeah. And the characters are dumb, but they're not like annoying. They don't argue in an annoying way. I expected this to be way more obnoxious, character wise.
I mean, the dialogue is fucking bad. And it's like cheap dialogue. Like this is a yard off. But it's like even like the very first piece of dialogue you get is like, you know, the thing with pizzas that when it's good, it's good and when it's bad, it's still pretty good.
It's like we've heard this fucking conversation since the eight. This is not even a new thought. Not even. That's kicking off.
Kicking off the movie. You told me about this fucking dance. You told me. You told me.
I did check that. This is not written by Toby. Hooper at all. You know, since we've been doing this podcast over the 10 nearing 11 years, you know, I now have children that live in my house.
And it's made me more of an adult. And being more of an adult, I can note that this super soaker thing is very dangerous. And I did not approve it. I'm watching it.
I'm just having a blast. He's like, oh, you fucker. I'm going to get you back. I'm like, you can keep your eyes on the road, sir.
I was like, this is so dangerous. Horrifying, horrifying. If the movie if they crash and the movie ended there, I'd understand. I'm stars on that box.
That's just unexpected crocodiles. A five minute short about kids crashing while I was super zeros. It's a PSA. Oh my god.
Yes. Yeah, no, dangerous. These kids are out of their fucking minds. And this also feels pre 9.11 in that way.
Yeah, in a lot of ways. It's like these kids. There's a lot of Tom Foolery that's happening during their stay. And a lot of Tom Foolery happens at the lake the next morning where the crocodile prowls.
They're playing football and tossing the pigs skin around in the lake. It looks like an egg. And they find an egg. They find a nest of eggs.
Duncan puts one in his pants to make it look like he's got a big bowl. That's what the nuts. Now that is a 2000s joke. Holy shit.
That is incredible. That dude read the Ripley's Believe It or Not book a lot from the Scholastic book fair. Look at that dude with them big balls. It's crazy.
It's crazy. Duncan is insane. And he also makes the worst Bloody Mary I've ever seen. It looked like they opened a can of Campbell's tomato soup and he put a piece of celery in it.
It was so light and gross looking. It was bad. But the dude likes it. Oh, I'm sorry.
The Bloody Mary happens after the crocodile bites the rope for the boat and the boat just drifts. They're wasted. They're so draping. They're not all so like after night fucking one.
How are they not so debilitatingly hungover that they can't function? They're playing fucking football in the swamp. In the swamp. That's not fair.
It's the end of my suspension disbelief. It's just like it takes it. It tanks it. They got the cargo shorts on which take on a lot of water.
Like I'm surprised that they do not drown themselves in this lake. But they all survive. They survive another night. And things get but things do get a little messy the next night because somebody brings up Sonny and Brady's history when she's drunk.
Claire throws Brady off the bow. Hubs gets eaten and the boat drifts away. We don't know. I didn't mention hubs at any point before this because hubs doesn't matter.
He's a sprinkling of people of bros that need to get killed before we get to anybody else in the business here. So I love that he's the first deaf because I really thought it was going to be Princess's mom. And then I thought it was going to be literally anybody but him. And I was like, well, he's the one that I would have liked to have that first.
Yeah, it was actually like it was our expectations were met there. We were hoping and praying that that was going to be the case. The dog princess seems to be like she was going to get eaten at any point in time. This is a big 90s 2000s move for sure of like make you think that the pet is going to die to the point that the pet is MIA for like a large chunk of the movie.
Yes. And then that shows up to essentially save the day and the final act. Yeah, they are very, very bad dog owners. Like horrible.
I mean, they're also sweet. How old are these characters supposed to be? Because we college. OK, I just want to make sure.
20. They're 19 or 20 years old because the one because when they come back with all the beer at the beginning, the sheriff or whatever is like, let me see some IDs. And the one guy hubs who gets in first, he shows his ID. And they're all like sweating.
They're like, oh, we should have a. I think it's all there. It's a fake ID. And no one has everybody's underage.
Yeah, because no one drinks like that when it's legal. Well, because Duncan. Did you turn 21? No.
Listen, one of my favorite rap lyrics of all time. Atmosphere wrote the lyric, I haven't drank 40s since I became old enough to drink. Like there's there's there's there's truth to that for a lot of people I've learned. But I I asked that because like these people look mid 20s to 30s.
But then at the very end, Duncan gives this whole speech about like, well, you were going to go away to college. Leave me alone. I'm like, wait, how old are these? Like, I'm like, big moment for me to really piece together.
Like, oh, these people are supposed to be teenagers of some type. Like late enter teenagers, but teenagers. Yeah. Well, I think that the idea is that there it's just bad writing.
Now, like that's really where we're at with this. I actually think I think they started as college kids and maybe I know that more than time. Yeah. Well, I don't think that this had a real strong team of editors.
I also think that like in a way that CGI gator that they approved. I'm just talking from the plots and offices. What I was really expecting was that when the towny guy who owns the boat is telling the story around the campfire of the crocodile, I'm like, oh my god, is this going to be the spiritual successor to eat in alive? Because now we fucking sick.
And they literally go up to the precipice. Yeah. And then they walk away from it. And I'm like, man, that would have been so, so good.
I mean, it's Toby Hooper. And it would have made so much sense to be like, oh, well, the crocodile from the end of eating alive never died. Yeah. No, it's right there for the taking.
And it does not happen. And then we even get to a point where there is like sort of like an alligator farm that's nearby. What? How is this not?
How is this not the secret? Yeah. Double features. There was a there was a review that I stumbled upon from Roo Morg.
And they said, the film is like Dawson's Creek, where most of the cast gets munched by a big reptile. It's not an unrewarding experience to watch. But ultimately, even the good bits are only good enough to make you still wish that you were watching alligator or like placid instead. Like, and I think that is like the exact like, yes, facts.
Like it's not that bad. But there's like the whole time you're watching it, you're just like, no, another alligator movie. I would rather be watching than this. Now it's true.
Because I was like, just to just to sort of bring it around to the kills of this. Everybody kind of gets killed the same way. Like that is one. And there are not to say they don't look good.
Like the practical kills happen. There's some great like half bodies. There's a severed head. That's the best part of this movie.
There's some really solid. Like the CGI stuff where Duncan gets swallowed whole by. And he's like, yeah. Like computer game, creature, and you're like, what is this?
Right. There's one whole set piece where a crocodile head comes through a wall. I mean, like then we have the crocodile tramping around a gas station in a CGI find. It's just you have this sort of dichotomy of it where it's just like not even like like placid has a lot of CGI in it.
Like but the bigger CGI too. It's better CGI. It's better CGI. That is something we said.
It's the same as comparing like the CGI sharks of deep blue sea to the CGI sharks of Sharknado. You know what I mean? Like one of those films, it's like, OK, I still wish these were practical, but at least the CGI is pretty decent. And the other one, it's like, this looks like a PC game from the 90s.
Just like wandering in here. Like what is this? This movie is right on the cusp of direct to DVD or direct to video becoming sci-fi channel original movies. Like right there at that turning point in a lot of ways.
Another review even called out that I saw like if not for Toby Hooper being behind the camera on this, this would easily have just been a sci-fi original movie. Yeah. You know, they're able to get some distribution on it because he had to have a because of his name, but it doesn't hold that much. I think I do have a lot of fun.
I think I don't find the characters all that annoying in a bad way that I can't watch. Like there is stuff that works. And then when we go to the alligator farm or the Crocodile farm, we have some like hillbilly characters that are working with the sheriff. Like all of that still, everything works.
Everything works the way it's supposed to. Like nothing feels like besides the CGI, which is just you know, whatever. Can I ask Kyle, when you picked this, were you mostly picking it just because hey, it's 25 year anniversary and you thought that it was a fourth of July movie? Or is this one that you watched enough that you had like fond memories of in the past?
I watched it once with Carly put it on my list about a year or two ago, maybe even before we probably before we knew we were going to do anniversaries. Yeah. I had it I had it in July. So from the jump, I thought it was before the Crocodile back.
Is that my bad? But I did have it in my in my list because I just had a lot of fun with it. When Carly and I had a blast with it when we watched it. And I was like, this is this really feels like again, the cusp of what could be like the difference between us watching a bad sci-fi channel movie and us watching something that is like, we can actually have fun talking about this.
This also strikes me as this is a perfect weird ass movie night film. It's like it's short. It's crazy. It's dumb.
It it would be a good like middle like second feature. It's quick enough. It's not your like headline event of that night by any stretch of the imagination. But like again, I'm giving this I feel like I'm going to give this movie more praise than it deserves because I really, truly thought it was going to be so low.
It was so low. Because like the only one of the only DVD releases of this was like with that movie octopus that came out around the same time and that movie is fucking abysmal to watch. I do have I do have octopus two on my list. I actually have four octopus two octopus two.
Yeah, they made a sequel. They made a sequel to this too. Those crocodile two, the deadly swamp. Yeah, yeah.
Nobody involved is included in this. Yeah, the review said it's a sequel in the sense that it has a crocodile. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, there's not that most of the people didn't survive it.
So now I really need to know more of what was happening. Yeah, I don't really care what happens to Duncan and Bradley after this movie. No, do you think the player's going to be Princess's mom now? Oh, actually has to be cared and nurtured for that egg.
So so princess is mom. Excuse me. Yes. Thank you for naming the other crocodile.
We could name the new crocodile Princess to Princess to. I mean, that baby. If we want to talk about where the CGI is so bad, I started chuckling when the CGI baby alligator just is crawling all over CGI parent alligator. I was like, this is hilariously awful.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So that that should I should also mention that the reason that this crocodile is after these kids is because hubs before his death, before his untimely death snuck a crocodile egg into Claire's backpack, which she has to have.
You know, like no one has anything. They all jump off the boat and she's like, I need my backpack. Ridiculous. Like, no, you don't need to like you don't you do not need your backpack.
I don't know what you need your backpack for. But she's like a little kid at camp. She's like, I need my backpack. It's my yeah.
Yeah. It's like that has my stuffy in it. I don't know. And she needs this backpack hub stuff the crocodile egg in there as a as a goof.
So now she's stuck with this egg and the crocodile has been after basically been after this egg the whole time. Not the reason why he's she's killing everyone. It's because of the egg. It's yeah, it's because of the egg.
The people are just in the way. But she does the crocodile does decide to go after them, follow them to the to the drug store that they make it to after their boat, you know, gets destroyed and you know, the sheriff and the crocodile farmers are out there looking for these for these goofy teenagers while they're going through the marsh and the woods to try to make it somewhere anywhere. They make it to a drug store. There's lots of Jones soda in the cooler.
That's how you know it's 2000. Yeah. Oh my God. I didn't even notice that, but yeah, it's a cool cooler.
Full dude. And I miss it. I miss Jones soda. They still make it.
It's still around. It's just not a problem. And as it's all of the flavors anymore, I think they probably still make like the rants of green apple and God, but I just like I thought that those labels were so cool. Like the photograph of like you could have you could be in you could get picked.
Yeah, you could do it. That was incredible. You could tell everybody on Insta messenger. You got that.
Go to the 711 or Jones soda out there. But Princess Princess escapes in surviving this whole thing while I love it. Kids are being picked off one by one. Princess is a star.
They actually credit it in the first in the opening credits of the movie. They credit Princess and Princess's handler right up front. So Princess has a lot of screen time and has a great arc in the crock. She needs a haircut though.
I'm going to tell you what. She needs a fucking haircut. Like she comes out of the water and you can see her actual body shape. And I'm like, holy shit, someone give because I I don't know if you or the listeners know, but I have a thing for crusty white dogs.
They are my favorite. The crusty of the better. And it's not that she's not cute. It's the fact that her body needs like keep the face crusty.
Trim the body down, you know, if Annabel loves her so much, she would she would get her groomed. That's it. And if I loved her so much, she wouldn't have been eaten by a fucking crocodile. That's right.
That's right. So Duncan Brady and Claire escaped this hellacious attack on the gas station. The next morning, the sheriff boat navigates the water to like basically a lynchian bottle of mentee, like love theme, which is the craziest music choice in the whole thing. I was like, Oh my God, they escaped.
I expected somehow the survivors to be on this boat. It's the sheriff and like the alligator farm or the crocodile farmer. Really weird. Claire still has the backpack.
So there is no stopping this crocodile, which is a flat dog is the name of the crocodile, by the way. What does that even mean? A Jonah. I do not know what that means.
I don't understand it. Even the image that I saved for my background is was titled flat dog. It's just like, OK, everybody flat dog is not even my top 10 favorite cinema crocodiles, reptiles, like nowhere, like, but it has a name crazy, crazy. Flat dog comes up to Claire with the last egg in her bag.
The group uses is using it as like to bait flat dog. And the crocodile hatches as we talked about and we get the fuck out of there. That's it. That's we get out.
It's kind of a crazy way that this movie just happens. So apparently, according to Google, yeah, flat dog is actually a slang for crocodile. You specifically by crocodile farmers. OK, I guess Toby Cooper wouldn't know that.
Yeah, I'm the asshole. I never heard that in my life. And I guess the idea is that you're saying it's like your pet dog, but that it lays perfectly flat. Like, OK, all right, I think it's a stretch crocodile, farm or folk or weird focus.
I mean, you can make you can try to tell me anything, but because you know crocodiles like the back of your hand, I would just be like, OK, I don't do a flat dog. OK, we're calling it flat dog. But this movie is great. It's on to me.
When did you guess exactly simple logs? Honestly, visit bet MDM Casino and check out the newest exclusive, the price is right fortune pick. Bet MDM and GameSense remind you to play responsibly 19 plus the wager Ontario only. Please play responsibly.
If you have questions or concerns about your gambling or someone close to you, please contact the next Ontario at 1-866-531-2600 to speak to an advisor. Recharge that MDM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with iGaming Ontario. Put down that smartphone and listen to me. I'm Matthew Milligan, professional musician and lifelong weird owl fan.
Each week, I'm joined by professional podcaster and close personal friends Matt Kelly. To take a dive off the defend into the fast career, a pop culture icon, beard owl yankovic on our show, Weird Algorithm, along with some very special guests from the world's music and comedy. We tackle every song, every television appearance and every bit of sketch comedy I'll has produced in chronological order covering the good old days of my bologna and eat it, the fun zone of tacky and white and nerdy and everything in between. As we go, we're ranking the songs, albums and music videos in hopes of creating the ultimate guide to a career bigger than the biggest ball of twine in Minnesota.
So the next time you're having one of those days, stuck in a traffic jam wondering why does this always happen to me? Just kick off your sneakers and stick around for a while because we've got it all on Weird Algorithm, available wherever you get your podcasts. And now you know. Was that enough references?
All right, well Kyle, if you were having someone over to watch Crocodile, I mean, there's a ton of options to put on next. What would you make them watch? Yeah, you could just let To Be Pick It For You, just the To Be Roulette. But I'm going to go with Shark Attack 3, Megalodon.
Wow. As my second choice. One day we have to do that pile of shit. It's such an insanely bad movie.
It's iconic. It's like a bird-demixed troll to level of bad. Yeah, yeah, it's it's unrelenting and that's going to be my second choice. Scott, how about you, sir?
I love a backwoods murder fest. And so I am going to go from here to mosquito because they also grow in the swamp. And, you know, there's no CGI in that. Well, there might be a little CGI in that, but practical.
Just kiss. All right. No, I think there's ones that people are expecting me to pick. But I believe both of those are actually gators and not crocodiles.
So instead, I'm going with the Italian film Killer Crocodile, which we'll be picking this time next year. We will have watched Killer Crocodile just wasn't anniversary this year. Was an anniversary this year. And I have been chomping at the bit for us to watch this one.
And speaking of chomping at the bit, y'all should be chomping at the bit to get yourself some shirts over at hm and podcast.dashery.com. Grab a Gaba Gulli's t-shirt, grab a blood hook shirt, grab, you know, we've got a ton of designs. Grab the reduce, reuse, reanimate shirt design. Also join our Patreon patreon.com backslash hm and podcast for bonus episodes, early releases of these episodes, video versions of the episodes, a ton of great stuff.
Find us on all of the socials at hm and podcast. You can see the amazing reels and tech talks that Kyle has been making. I've also been uploading them to the Geekscape YouTube channel and they do pretty damn well over there as well. And email us at hm and podcast at gmail.com.
If you want to join our newsletter or if you want to tell us a anniversary film that we should be covering this year for our September listener submitted month. And now Kyle back to you. What is something that you've watched, read, listen to, et cetera, that you are a big fan of. So celebrating another 25 years this year is the road to El Dorado, which I probably haven't seen since a summer camp or maybe a substitute teacher in like middle school, right?
Like it is, but I remember, Carly, myself, and then Evan came down to visit. But we were all sort of talking about like generationally lost animated films. And I don't think that road to El Dorado was lost, but it's got a very niche fan base, though, compared to other stuff. Correct.
Exactly. And that time late nineties to early 2000s was like ripe for those things. Like I think that when we were considering an animated feature that wasn't prominent, like Don Bluth comes up, like Don Bluth movies aren't all that fucking fun. Sorry.
All you blue heads out there. They're not have fun. Like so thumbolina was out. All dogs go to heaven was gonna be too sad.
So we were just trying to find something else, right? Road to El Dorado, Elton John, just it was it was a great it was a great thing to revisit. Like there's a little bit of there's a little bit of computer animation, like earlier computer animation in there to match with the with the drawing animation. It's kind of weird that Kenneth Bernat and Chris Klein are playing two Spanish folks, but that's you know, we can put that aside in the year 2000.
It's just and the music is so Elton John. It's so distinctly Elton John that it's almost nauseating. I had a lot of fun watching it. Like expectations were not high.
I just remembered that it was in front of my eyes at some point in time in my early childhood, right? And it was cool to revisit it. I would I suggest it and let like, Chell is an iconic animated female character. Like let's not forget that she's incredible.
Big crush on her and it was almost it was basically like reinstated when we watched Road to El Dorado. I was like, Oh yeah, OK, it wasn't weird that we were all attracted to Chell at that point in time. They drew her that way. So it's like there's a lot of adult humor in there.
I'm not bad. I was going to say she's not bad. She was just drawn that way. Right.
Yeah, it's vibes, big vibes from Chell on that. And but it was just there's a lot of like adult humor in there too. Obviously, like, you know, we're talking about finding it's mythical, but it's not indigenous folks, but it's not like it's it's in El John, but it's not. There's a lot happening there, but Road to El Dorado was a fun watch in the year 2025.
Well, I watched I was watching it weekly. It's finally over. It's probably going to be on my top 10 shows of this year, but I I don't think I'll hold it as as highly as a few other people did. And I am talking about the Apple plus series, the studio.
Did either of you watch anything of this show? No, I watched a couple like behind the scenes clips because they keep coming up. Yeah. So so the thing that's interesting about the studio is Seth Rogen created series.
And the premise is that he becomes the youngest head of this TV, this film studio. And each episode is like a different episode of them trying to get a movie produced. And like in a very curvier enthusiasm kind of way they blunder and fuck up every movie that they're trying to get made, like they're trying to do the Oscar paint movie. It just doesn't work.
They're trying to get like a prestige director. It doesn't work. There there's like a really funny episode where they're essentially just trying to remake. They're trying to basically just do smile again, but not smile like they're trying to produce a movie called Grin, but they're trying to they're trying to pay the director and writer of the smile movies to make it and it's him playing himself.
And like there's like literally a line was like, let's call a spade a spade. You're paying me to remake my own movie. Like it's got like a very meta self-aware aspect to it. But what makes the show fun and interesting to watch is in the very first episode, Seth, Seth Green's character, or sorry, Seth Rogan's character is talking about why he loves Goodfellas and how brilliant the tracking shot in that movie is where they basically like follow them through for like an eight minute tracking shot.
So the whole show is long tracking shots. Like a 30 minute episode is maybe made out of three takes that are consistent 10 minute shots of them like walking around the movie set while all this crazy stuff has happened. And it's just got a it's not for everybody, but like for people who like that kind of snippy, fast paced, like almost like when the 90s were trying to do screwball comedy movies, think of like the player, if you ever saw the player like those movies that are just like they're super about Hollywood and they're super quick and they're super frenetic dialogue. Like it's eight episodes of that like just very snippy, very quick, very fast moving and you're like watching as a person who even remotely cares about filmmaking, you're just like, I cannot believe that this is the same shot for the last like 12 minutes that the scene is happening.
And then you get in your head about like, Oh my God, to fuck up a line. 11 minutes in this scene and having everybody so mad at you. I just don't even want to imagine. But yeah, it was fun.
I think they're doing another season. I'll definitely watch another season, but I've said it before, there's certain shows where I watch it and I know I'm going to like come back to it regularly for rewatches. I think that this is one that shows that I will watch each new season as it comes out, but I will not feel a need to revisit any of them. They're just it's it's like interest.
It's kind of like when we talked about how interesting the psycho remake is just because of the gall to do that. Like the I the gall to be like, let's do a shot for shot remake of this beloved film. Like the gall to like, we're going to make a TV series where every single shot is a extended tracking shot is just so ambitious that you like have to applaud it a little bit. Yeah.
But that's it for me Scott. What book what book with an S after that? Did you read on your trip around Europe? So the next one is the next two.
The first one and the two is the scourge between stars by Ness Brown and it's it starts off so great. It's only like 150 pages and it's relatively well written and then it just evolves into literally alien. And I was expecting cosmic existential horror. I am so glad that I like rented it or borrowed it from the library.
I didn't pay for it was great. But yeah, that was kind of a bummer because like I didn't I didn't hate the read, but I was just like, wait a minute, did you literally just write perfect creature? I'm like, what? Perfect organism.
It's like so alien to the point of being. It's so the storyline of alien to be to the point of being plagiarism. But I really enjoyed the bog wife by K. Chronister.
I think it's how you spell her last name. Bog wife. The bog wife. Now it's not really horror.
It's more like it's got like full core, but it's very light on the horror. It's kind of quiet horror. And the conceit of the story is it's this family of kind of like reclusive West Virginians that the that have lived on a cranberry bog for an extended like generations and generations. And every the patriarch of the family goes out to the bog, does a does a ritual.