“Dating Roundup #12: Sex and Violence” by Zvi

No more burying the sex stuff under an avalanche of other stuff so no one notices. Use the break while we have one. Let's go. You’re Single Because You Suck At Kissing Luckily this is first one is fixable and Critter is here to help. I find the advice here highly plausible. Like many skills, there are a lot of subtle skills, but a handful of basic principles matter a lot, especially paying attention and responding to what you’re getting back. Critter's theory is that a basic kiss is a bell curve of intensity, done at a slight angle. First kiss style is elongated with less pressure. French kissing is trickier and less structured, see the thread, and the big mistake is to try to force it. It's not that simple, but like most things, there are some basic mistakes to avoid and first principles, then if you are genuinely paying attention and engaged you’ll be fine, and improve with practice. Seek deliberate practice and clear feedback, iterate. I get the same sense with dancing. Yes, you need specific knowledge and practice, but if you use your human racial bonuses the remaining ‘cognitive core’ from [...] ---Outline:(00:20) You're Single Because You Suck At Kissing(01:25) You're Not Single But You're Sexually Incompatible(02:56) You're Single Because You Aren't Into BDSM(08:14) You're Single Because You Didn't Do The Work(16:34) You're Single Because Being a Dominant Is Too Much Work(23:41) You're Single And Would Rather Be Free Use(26:35) You're Single Because You Wouldn't or Did Choke Her(28:15) You're Single Because You Have Very Particular Preferences(30:06) You're Single Because of Polygyny(31:00) You're Single Because Polyamory Isn't Right For You(35:11) You're Single And Call It Solo Polyamory(38:49) You're Single Because You Didn't Go To Slutcon(46:41) You're Single So Let's Marry Aella --- First published: May 18th, 2026 Source: https://www.lesswrong.com/posts/znzZyvxAvSSkep4tL/dating-roundup-12-sex-and-violence --- Narrated by TYPE III AUDIO. ---Images from the article:Apple Podcasts and Spotify do not show images in the episode description. Try Pocket Casts, or another podcast app.