Dealing with Difficult Colleagues: The Underminer

Ever had a colleague who keeps cutting you out of the loop? They conveniently "forget" to invite you to key meetings. They drop you from email chains. Or withhold information that you need to do your best work.  Some of them do this so subtly, you may even start to doubt whether they do it on purpose. But regardless, it's beyond frustrating.  It's impacting your ability to perform.  And it's impacting how you feel about your job. Dealing with an underminer is tricky. Especially if you're a leader. Asking your boss to intervene risks seeming like you can't handle it.  And you can't simply go rip the underminer a new one (as much as you might fantasize about it). So what do you do? Some of the worst leadership advice I've heard is on this topic: "tell your colleague how their bad behaviour makes you feel." This advice is great for couples therapy. But it's awful advice for the workplace. But, fear not. This week, I'll break down exactly why this doesn't work with an underminer.  And how you can successfully navigate this workplace challenge in a way that gets results and wins respect. What You'll Learn:  Why the typical advice ends up backfiring…and undermining you Framing the discussion so that you get results (from the culprit) and backing (from the boss) The exact script to use to address a colleague's shady behavior A simple bonus question to make your conversation even more effective If you've ever had to deal with a colleague who plays the undermining game, you'll want these techniques in your toolkit. For more information, visit The Mental Offload.