“Demon Safety” by Ben Pace

(by LemmySmackett) "Hey man, I haven't seen you in a minute. What are you up to these days?" "Been on that grind, bro. I got a new gig." "Really? You found a job in this dog shit economy?" "Full time, full benies. And the pay is insane." "That's great to hear, man. Let's fuckin' go!" "Let's fuckin' go." "Hey, maybe you can hook me up? I'm sick of this retail bullshit." "Well—" "If I gotta stock one more shelf at CostGro, I swear to God—" "It's a competitive position. And you need a degree." "Come on. I just got my G.E.D." "That's not—" "Just tell me what you're working in, bro. Maybe I can come on as an intern." "Demon Safety." "*Demon* Safety?" "You know: fiends, pookas, yokai, boggarts—" "Wow." "The occasional cambion." "Sounds intense." "It is. But it's fulfilling work that makes the world a better place." "That's inspiring, bro." "And the pay is insane." "And you're sure they're not hiring?" "Oh, they're hiring. They're just not hiring you." "Damn." "Sorry." "So [...] --- First published: August 12th, 2026 Source: https://www.lesswrong.com/posts/RWavpsyDJxffS6LgG/demon-safety --- Narrated by TYPE III AUDIO.