Derek Arden with Tim Durkin — The Results Model

Tim Durkin Returns: The Results Model, Via Negativa & The Arrival Fallacy 🚀 I’m Derek Arden, and welcome to Monday Night Live. Tonight, we’re delighted to have Tim Durkin from Granbury, Texas, one of our founding members and long-time friends of the show. Tim first joined us when Monday Night Live launched on 23rd March 2020, and he’s been part of the family ever since. Tim is an educator, a lifelong learner, and someone dedicated to sharing wisdom, insight, and practical ideas you can apply immediately. After months on the road, he told us he’d “missed the group, missed the learning, and missed all his MNL friends.” And tonight, he returned in classic Durkin form — thoughtful, humorous, and packed with gold. So let’s dive into the three big transformational ideas Tim shared… 1️⃣ The Results Model — Why You’re Getting EXACTLY the Results You Deserve 📈 Tim opened with a model that he says has “saved his life… maybe twice.” Learned originally from Larry Wilson at the Pecos River Learning Center, it explains—beautifully and bluntly—why we get the results we do in life. 🧩 The Model in Brief:Event → Evaluation → Response → Result → Next Event Every event triggers an evaluation (“What does this mean?”), which drives a response, which creates a result… which becomes the next event.Most people believe they should be getting love, happiness, financial security, peace, success. But Tim makes a provocative point: “The results you should be getting are exactly the results you’re getting.” Not as punishment — but because all the conditions that create those results are currently in place. If you want different results?You don’t always need to change your map (your beliefs, worldview, or identity)…But you can always change your response. And Tim’s wonderful little finger-rotation exercise proved it instantly:Change your point of view — and what you see changes too. Magic. 2️⃣ Via Negativa — Improving Life by Subtraction 🗑️✨ Next, Tim introduced the elegant idea of via negativa — borrowed from Peter Drucker and inspired by Michelangelo’s “I just released David from the stone.” Instead of endlessly adding tasks, books, goals, habits, apps, and projects… Ask:“What do I need to REMOVE?” Complexity is often self-created.Deleting requires courage.And sometimes the bravest thing you can do is let go. Tim suggested a brilliant New Year tradition:New Year’s Dissolutions, not Resolutions. Write down things you want to subtract from your life — unhealthy habits, pointless subscriptions, unhelpful commitments, even energy-draining people — and burn them in a “burning bowl” ritual. (Maybe not in the Hilton Hotel like Derek’s friend Simon Zucchi… unless you enjoy triggering fire alarms!) A killer question to evaluate anything you’re doing:“If we weren’t already doing this, would we start today?”If the answer is no — maybe it’s time to dissolve it. 3️⃣ The Arrival Fallacy — Why The Journey Is the Reward 🧭❤️ Tim’s third idea dismantles a common myth:The belief that achieving a goal creates lasting satisfaction. It almost never does. As Tim put it:“Three people I know who reached the summit of Everest all had the same reaction: it’s just a bunch of rocks.” The joy was in the months of preparation, the training, the challenge, the adventure. From Winnie the Pooh to Ralph Waldo Emerson to Cervantes… the timeless message is the same: The journey is better than the destination. Tim quoted world-number-one golfer Scottie Scheffler, who says after winning a tournament he enjoys about 10 minutes of satisfaction… then wonders what’s for dinner. Because the practice is the joy. 🎯 Final Thoughts & Derek’s Wrap-Up Tim closed by reminding us that: If you want new results, examine your map and your response. If life feels overloaded, try subtracting instead of adding. And whatever goal you’re chasing… remember to enjoy the journey. Derek added his own reflections on energy vampires (“they impose a YES tax”), post-it burning mishaps, and his travels to Fiji and New Zealand — which, he admitted, looked suspiciously like the Surrey Hills after 24 hours of jet lag. A brilliant session packed with insight, humour, and practical wisdom.Tim — thank you! 🙌 https://derekarden.co.uk https://negotiationexpert.co NEW https://negotiatorspodcast.com https://www.linkedin.com/in/negotiatingexpert/