Divorce Story | The Kind of Grief Men Are Expected to Carry Alone with Murf

Today's Divorce Story is with Pete Murphy or Murf, as he's known to his friends. Murf's story is incredibly powerful. It is a story about losing so much of what once felt certain: his family life, his identity, his sense of stability, and at times, his hope. But it is also a story about what can happen when people show up, when support is offered in a way that can actually be received, and when a man begins to rebuild from the inside out. In this conversation, Murf speaks openly about the moment he now recognises as rock bottom, lying in his driveway with police standing over him asking if he was okay. He shares what it felt like to be completely overwhelmed, to feel like there was no point getting back up again, and what it took to keep going. We talk about male grief, the way men are often conditioned to hide pain, and why so many men feel they have to carry separation alone. Murf also shares the daily practices that have helped him through some of the hardest days, including breathwork, meditation, journaling, self-reflection and learning how to create space between what happens and how he responds. This episode is not spoken from the finish line. Murf is still in the middle of his story. And that is what makes this conversation so important. In this episode, we discuss: What life looked like before everything changed Murf's rock bottom moment and what it felt like emotionally and physically Why men often struggle to speak openly about grief The shame and isolation many men experience during separation The importance of friendship, connection and people showing up Why accepting help is not weakness The difference between surrendering and giving up Rebuilding when the story is still unfolding How breathwork, journaling and daily practices helped Murf cope What not to say to someone going through separation Why listening is sometimes more powerful than trying to fix Murf's message for anyone listening, especially men, is simple but deeply important: you are not alone. You do not have to carry this by yourself. And accepting help is not failure, it can be the beginning of finding your way back. Host: Nikki Parkinson, TEDx Speaker, Divorce Doula, Coach and Founder of The Divorce and Separation Hub. The Divorce and Separation Hub Website The Divorce and Separation Hub Instagram The Divorce and Separation Hub Facebook The Divorce and Separation Hub Linkedin Join our Divorce and Separation community HERE. Watch Nikki's TEDx Talk HERE. Guest: Pete Murphy Website Instagram Blokes Day Out Facebook Murf is a Gold Coast-based fitness and lifestyle coach with over 25 years of experience helping people build stronger bodies, minds, and lives. After navigating his own devastating divorce - losing his business, his home, his family, and at times his will to keep going - Murf found his deeper purpose in human wellbeing and connection.  He founded Blokes Day Out, a men's community initiative built on the belief that what saves us isn't programs or resources, it's people showing up for each other.  Through his coaching brand murf.com.au, he works with men and women to build the tools, habits, and mindset to navigate life's hardest chapters. Murf's approach is grounded, honest, and lived - because he's been through it, and in many ways is still going through it.  Loved This Episode? Support the podcast by subscribing, leaving a five-star review, and sharing it with someone who could use a little extra support right now. This episode is produced by Dan King of Dan King Productions. This episode is sposnored by Simple Separation, the smarter way to separate. Simple Separation is an online, fixed-fee service designed to help Australian couples finalise their divorce and separation respectfully, collaboratively, and without the stress of going to court. From property settlements and parenting plans to child support and divorce applications, everything you need is under one roof, saving you time, money, and unnecessary conflict. Book your free consultation today to find out if Simple Separation is right for your situation at simple-separation.com.au. Disclaimer I hope you enjoyed the podcast today. The information we discussed today was just that information only. It is not specific advice. If you take action following something you heard today, it is important to make sure you get professional advice about your unique situation before you proceed, whether that advice be legal, financial, accounting, medical or other advice. Please reach out to me if you have any questions or if there's another topic you'd like explored.