Do We Step Into Fear Or Stay Where We Are? episode artwork

EPISODE · Apr 25, 2024 · 38 MIN

Do We Step Into Fear Or Stay Where We Are?

from Imperfect Mens Club · host Mark Aylward & Jim Gurule

Mark introduces the idea of moving from where you are to where you want to be. How we are tempted to stay in our comfort zone and how our focus in men. We are attempting to help men get more comfortable with being vulnerable. He goes on to lay out the possible paths of staying "comfortable" versus striving for more Jim jumps in and brings in our flywheel and the notion that most of this comes down to self awareness.  Jim talks about listening to a recent podcast with Tim Ferris where he discusses his current place in life and how different it is from his younger days Mark uses Jim as an example of someone who strives for more. You either choose to get better or you stay comfortable Jim returns the compliment to Mark as being aspirational as well Mark talks about never getting rid of fear, but continuing to try to overcome it.  Once you move into fear, things start moving forward. He suggest's that progress I not linear The guys are using a graphic that shows stage of growth  comfort - fear - learning -growth They bring Tim Ferris back into the discussion and how he focuses now on quality and not quantity. People and not money Mark brings up the Harvard Study of men and their happiness Jim quotes Ferris "think of projects as experiments". It'll never be perfect…just put it out there It's about content, not polish. Mark shares his editing approach - simple and quick Jim shares some more about the future of podcasting and Mark shares his point of view Mark brings up Tim Ferris' "Tools Of Titans" and Jim talks about how he loves to interview people The guys disagree on the notion of defining what success looks like and then discover it's not a disagreement, it's a misunderstanding. After clarification - good point. Let's agree on what success means or what words mean before we move forward The guys go back and dig into the graphic. They are seeing it from two different vantage points and the discussion brings context. After contextualizing things the guys agree and the discussion progresses and gets interesting Jim brings back up the previous episode and dopamine and adds that as context   Dopamine hits come from fear and excitement among the things Mark recalls their  just put it outconversation they had about having nothing and having everything   Jim expresses some "envy" about Mark uncertain future and Mark returns the favor. Both guys share their perspectives about having everything and nothing They move in to a discussion of risk and the notion of moving from comfort to fear and purpose and the reality that life moves back and forth The value of hanging out with interesting people and developing the ability to solve problems. Jim goes back to the graphic.  Mark brings his faith and what he is supposed to give back. His purpose is being of service The topic of goals comes up. Mark thinks of metrics and how he doesn't like specific goals. Now he sets process and consistency goals. Jim likes the word 'objectives" Mark says goals are specific numbers and objectives are destinations. Interesting discussion Mark says he thinks you have to have aspirations Jim suggests that maybe it's a mindset. He feels like he's moved from what "he" wants and what "we" want. The guys talk about how sports and sales drove their goal driven somewhat selfish actions, which drove success, but maybe wasn't the best way to be Mark tells the story about his most recent coach/program and his evolution around this concept - we all have a judge of ourselves, others and circumstances. The other side is your sage. Fascinating stuff Jim brings up a few of his experiences with some other "next level" guys - self awareness Mark says he feels like he is reacting to both his stage in life and the circumstances around him   He feels an obligation to help.  Jim agrees. "You have an obligation to let that out". He circles back to the graphic. It won't be perfect,  Civil discourse, we need more. Jim says the podcast platform is still new and a big difference in how we communicate  

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This episode was published on April 25, 2024.

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