Do your investor updates secretly suck?

Hey friends 👋You’ve seen the email before:Subject: “Huge month!!”Body: 10,000 users, engagement through the roof, three new features shipped, featured in a newsletter. No revenue. No retention breakdown. No ask. And somehow, you think that’s an investor update.This week, JDM and Cameron break down what investor updates are actually for — and why the founders sending the flashiest ones are often the ones with the least to show.A good update isn’t a highlight reel. It’s a signal:* Here’s the one metric that matters right now;* Here’s what’s working and what isn’t; and* Here’s exactly what we need from you.That’s it.Do that consistently, and you’re building trust long before anyone writes a check.Then comes the game! Three realistic scenarios, scored on the conviction scale:* A SaaS tool drowning in vanity metrics and no ask (a very generous two).* A dental practice management startup with actual numbers, actual churn honesty, and a specific ask that almost got there (a strong eight).* A consumer mental health app with 150K downloads, no paying customers, and a premium tier with results too “encouraging” to share yet (another two).And it’s a conviction sandwich!But a Keto edition… the good stuff is in the middle.Frivolous thoughts this week: JDM got a YouTube Music recommendation he didn’t ask for and absolutely needed; and Cameron walked out of a Sacramento record shop with some Cat Stevens vinyl.Turns out the thread between grunge, riot-grrl, punk, and folk peace anthems is stronger than you’d think.As always, thanks for listening.—Cameron and JDMTimestamps00:00 Introduction02:15 What is an investor update (and why most are facades)05:30 What to actually include: the five elements13:30 Scenario 123:15 Scenario 233:15 Scenario 337:30 Frivolous Thoughts This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit zerototraction.substack.com