Don't behave like you have no choice?

Quit or carry onWhen I work with sportsman often you get to a situation where they talk about quitting because things are so tough and it's not going their way. I'll always say to them, "Let’s not be flippant about quitting. This is a serious statement so if you genuinely want to quit then do it, don’t just talk about it. There are only two answers to this. You either quit or you carry on, but if you carry on, you carry on with a positive attitude. Working towards a goal with a negative attitude is living in a horrible environment, one that will never succeed, especially when tough challenges occur as they most certainly do. When it gets difficult the idea of quitting cannot invade the mind."I worked with a company director who basically was telling me his story, and wow this was a massive moan. Basically it seemed to me like he carried the company on his back. He was doing everything, other directors were lazy, they weren't pulling their weight, and he was the guy who was always having to deal with the staff, and he was the guy who was always having to motivate people, and it was just way too much for him.I came with the same thing, I said, "Well there's only two answers to this, quit or carry on. If you choose to carry on, you have to also choose to have a different attitude and stop behaving like it's not a choice. Nobody likes a moaner."You can bet your bottom dollar that if he's moaning to me, he's probably moaning to different people in the company and that's terrible for morale. That is not leadership. Leadership is sticking to a really good attitude as an example to everybody around you.He is a bright guy and understood what I said and decided to carry on and work on his attitude.I said to him, "A key ingredient to the success of this transformation is to realise you that you're senior enough to choose what you're going to focus on."Then we started to talk about what he really wanted to focus on and what he was really good at and where he could influence and where he couldn't. He started to say no to certain things. Where he couldn't influence, he stopped interfering and worrying about these issues or moaning about them. He began to realise that often he had made no positive impact to certain areas because usually they weren’t even his forte and he had been stifling others. He started to focus on his priorities and strengths and forget about the rest, and of course that kind of tidied up his life because he wasn't worrying about things that really had nothing to do with him. I said, "Look, if people don't pull their weight and that messes up, not your problem, relax about it. Somebody will have to tidy it up or they won't, but make sure everything you do is positive and good." The reality was he began to trust his colleagues when they began to manage just fine without his interference.It's a fantastic story of what getting the right mindset can do. The benefits that began to flow through by tidying up his life were certainly better for him, for his colleagues and family as well. Happy people are more productive and fun to be around.The nugget for this week is to think carefully before you say you have to do things like you have no choice. Often it is a poor habit or an excuse when the fact is it is your decision whether to take on a project, accept an invitation or simply say yes because you are too afraid to say no!You can quit your job completely or as with this director, quit certain elements of your job in order to do better in other areas. What in your life do you need to quit and where you are committed do things with a positive energy?Check out MindsetCollege.co.uk where you will find a pathway to help you navigate your way to a successful mindset for elite performance. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices