Dwowsy.

Every weekday afternoonat 3 o’clockthe day becomes soheavythough its balance is far past the tipping pointthe last few hourslooming aheadare somewhat overwhelming and I just get sotired.I make a cup of caffeine free teawhich perks me up becausethe water is just fartoo hotthen back to work withwistful sighs forsimpler times whencomplex afternoonswere met with mats and window shades.I miss napsso much morethan i miss youth(which was exhausting)every dayat 3 o’clockwe’d all lay downand close our eyesfor just a minutemaybe 20did we appreciate this?no.we didn’twe were foolish childrenunawareunable to anticipatethe wearinessof every dayas grown-upsand we wasted so muchtime we could haveclosed our eyes– for just a minute.I’ve never enjoyed sleepingall that muchsleep’s not that into memy mind transformsinto a loudunconscious sketchpadworking out the day aheadbut napswell nestled in the chaoswere a keen respitefrom conscious mayhemand when you woke upthere was juicefrom plastic jugswith colors neon brightin paper cupsa liquid sweetness never matchedby the finest winesavailable to humanityI never liked the cookiesthey were always dryunsatisfyingcookies should be warmbut the juice and naps were goldenthat’s what I am thinking ofeach weekday afternoonbehind my deskwith too hot teaat 3 o’clock. Get full access to :lowerblackpain at lowerblackpain.substack.com/subscribe