E122: How to Work Less with the Accountability Triangle

Learn how to work less with the Accountability Triangle by getting clear, focusing on the outcome, setting boundaries, and stop doing other people's jobs    In this episode, I show you what accountability really is and how you can transform it to a super power for stressing and working less. You have most likely been taught a form of accountability that focuses on control and drives you towards burnout, especially if you have been socialized as a woman and now work as a woman in leadership, woman in tech, woman in stem, or more.For example:“Hold them accountable”“Make sure Bob is putting his numbers into the report correctly”“Your job is to get them to act”Sure these statements may sound innocent and simple – maybe even normal – but they really, really aren’t.In fact, these statements, and the mindset behind them, are destined to wear you out, slow down your career growth, limit your goal achievement, and cap your income.This form of accountability is actually not-so-hidden control:controlling otherscontrolling shared situationseven controlling the uncontrollableWhich is as far away from the true definition of accountability as you can get, almost the exact opposite. Webster’s Dictionary defines accountability as “an obligation or willingness to accept responsibility or to account for one’s actions” (emphasis mine).True accountability is a habit that empowers you and is based on clarity, boundaries, communication, and excellence for YOU. Real accountability is a force that reduces that amount of stress you carry and the amount of extra effort you take on. Real accountability reduces conflicts, matures timelines and scopes, and focuses you on what you can actually control: YOU, your mindset, your actions, and your future.But if the definition is clear and the benefits are many, why (oh why?!) is accountability so misunderstood and misused?In other words, why are you so exhausted, overscheduled, and struggling?Well, the short answer is that if you take on too much governance, control, and delivery, calling it “accountability” other people get to do less themselves.In other words, you do their job. Or maybe their jobs.You do their tasks, their thinking and planning, and, most exhaustingly, their emotional labor.It is exhausting. You are exhausted because it is exhausting.So, how do you change it up, stop doing their job, and create space and time for yourself? I offer you the Accountability Triangle The Accountability Triangle is a framework I use with my clients. They consistently report that the Accountability Triangle helps them make clear choices that reduce their work effort by between one and three hours each week.The Accountability Triangle is rooted in my numerous certifications as well as established research, including:Erickson Solution Focused CoachingProsci Change Management Practitioner, specifically stakeholder managementProject Management Institute, specifically RACIKarpman Drama TriangleThe Power of Ted*Empowerment TriangleThe Triangle has three elements:a shared outcome or goalyou and your accountabilities and responsibilitiesa second person’s accountabilities and responsibilities.Register here to get access to the video and workbook combo: https://view.flodesk.com/pages/649b392bcac3e37f36e4a29dThank you so much for listening to season four! I am grateful for your time and reviews, emails, and DMs sharing how Celebrate Brave has impacted you. Please continue sharing! Related Episodes: E105: How to Believe Yourself & My Autoimmune Story  https://celebratebrave.libsyn.com/e105-how-to-believe-yourself-my-autoimmune-storyE95: Brave is the Bridge to Everything You Dream About  https://celebratebrave.libsyn.com/brave-is-the-bridge-to-everything-you-dream-aboutE101: The Truth About Lay-Offs & What To Do  https://celebratebrave.libsyn.com/e101-the-truth-about-lay-offs-what-to-do Resources: Drama Triangle: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karpman_drama_triangleEmpowerment Triangle: https://www.emexmag.com/empowerment-triangle-model/RACI project management: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Responsibility_assignment_matrixStakeholder Management: Prosci https://www.prosci.com/Terry Real: https://terryreal.com/For more information on how you can build your brave:[email protected]://tricksteinbach.com/https://www.instagram.com/nicoletricksteinbachhttps://www.linkedin.com/in/nicoletricksteinbach/https://www.facebook.com/NicoleTrickSteinbach