E15: Grief Is A Companion For Life ft. Hashim's Dad (Azher Rubanni) part 1

How has Dad Always helped you redefine fatherhood after your loss?How do you live after your baby dies without feeling like you’re betraying them by surviving? That question sits at the center of my conversation with Azher Rubanni, a father who lost his son Hashim in a full-term stillbirth 20 years ago. We get honest about what many dads feel but rarely say: the pressure to be the “strong one,” the instinct to suppress emotion to protect your partner and kids, and the quiet fear that if the pain ever dulls, you’ll be forgetting your child.Azher walks us through the day everything changed, including the moment he decided, in a hospital car park, that he would become the supporter no matter what it cost him inside. We talk about telling his three sons their brother would not be coming home, the cultural forces that tried to keep children away from grief, and why inviting kids into the truth can build trust for life. We also explore how different grieving styles inside a marriage can create distance, and why the workplace can become both a refuge and a trap, especially for fathers who feel they must “perform” competence while falling apart.Then we shift to what helps over the long term. Azher offers a powerful alternative to the language of “healing” and “moving on”: reconciliation. He breaks it into three parts: reconciling with yourself reconciling with your child’s memory and reconciling with the relationships you still have. If you’re navigating stillbirth, miscarriage, baby loss, or parenting after loss, this one is a grounded, candid conversation for fathers and the people who love them. Subscribe, share with a dad who needs it, and leave a review telling us what part hit home.SUPPORT PATHWAYIf you are a bereaved dad who's quietly struggling to cope with baby loss and you'd like to talk one-on-one, let's have a FREE private 30-minute conversation. Go to dadalways.com for more information. Theme Music: "Love Letter” was created using AI as a creative tool, with lyrics and direction shaped by the personal experiences and emotional intent of the host.Show Music from SoundstripeSunfrost by Cody MartinFirst Bloom by MomentsFarewells by Shimmer