EPISODE · Nov 24, 2021 · 1H 7M
E64. The Hitman in All of Us - with Devon Gaster, Violence Prevention Advocate
from unMASKing with Male Educators: Creating Emotionally Safe Classrooms & Schools for Male Students · host Ashanti Branch - Taking Off The Mask
“In the very early stages of the work, we name our ‘Hitman’, our violent side, our abusive side - words that describe how we become when we become abusive. And mine is ‘The Justified, Vengeful, Equalizer.’ He’s mean; he gets revenge - if you mess with me, I’m going to mess with you, I’m going to hurt you. And I get biblical… That hitman side of me has gotten me into a lot of trouble.” - Devon Gaster Ever Forward Club’s Ashanti Branch is joined by Devon Gaster. As the co-founder and Executive Director of Men Creating Peace, Devon has worked for over 23 years educating men about the devastating impacts of intimate partner violence. He does this work so successfully by making sure he is a facilitator that is vulnerable about his past, self-aware of his present, and reliable to the men he works with. Devon draws parallels to the “back of the mask” with “the Hitman”, an analogy he uses to help men get in touch with the abusive tendencies they seek to end. Ashanti and Devon explore their masks, as well as their Hitmen. We hope you enjoy the show! (1:20) Ashanti’s introduction. (5:30) Devon introduces himself and the organization he founded, Men Creating Peace, which helps men put an end to their abusive behavior. He shares how he overcame his own abusive behaviors and tendencies. (17:20) Ashanti and Devon make their masks together. (25:30) Ashanti shares the front of his mask - dedicated, passionate, caring. (27:15) Devon shares the front of his mask - generous, dependable, open-hearted - and how it helps him connect with others. (30:50) Ashanti shares the back of his mask - caused harm, childhood abuse, domestic abuse at home as a child - and how he realized that hurt he was receiving he was passing on to others. (34:50) Devon shares the back of his mask - mean-spirited, procrastination, insecure/afraid/scared - and how he is working on getting “unstuck” and continuing to overcome fear. (42:20) Ashanti and Devon discuss the concept of the “hitman”, who has been shaped by gender norms and expectations particular to a given society. (49:20) Then, they apply the hitman analogy to school-age young men and boys. (1:02:50) Devon shares how you can get in touch with him. --- Connect with Devon Gaster Website: mencreatingpeace.org Facebook: facebook.com/mencreatingpeace Instagram: instagram.com/mencreatingpeace Twitter: twitter.com/mencreatepeace --- Create your own mask anonymously at www.100kmasks.com If you are interested in being on the Face to Face podcast, email us at [email protected] --- Connect with Ashanti Branch: Instagram: instagram.com/branchspeaks Facebook: facebook.com/BranchSpeaks Twitter: twitter.com/BranchSpeaks LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/ashantibranch Website: branchspeaks.com --- Send in a voice message: anchor.fm/branch-speaks/message
What this episode covers
“In the very early stages of the work, we name our ‘Hitman’, our violent side, our abusive side - words that describe how we become when we become abusive. And mine is ‘The Justified, Vengeful, Equalizer.’ He’s mean; he gets revenge - if you mess with me, I’m going to mess with you, I’m going to hurt you. And I get biblical… That hitman side of me has gotten me into a lot of trouble.” - Devon Gaster Ever Forward Club’s Ashanti Branch is joined by Devon Gaster. As the co-founder and Executive Director of Men Creating Peace, Devon has worked for over 23 years educating men about the devastating impacts of intimate partner violence. He does this work so successfully by making sure he is a facilitator that is vulnerable about his past, self-aware of his present, and reliable to the men he works with. Devon draws parallels to the “back of the mask” with “the Hitman”, an analogy he uses to help men get in touch with the abusive tendencies they seek to end. Ashanti and Devon explore their masks, as well as their Hitmen. We hope you enjoy the show! (1:20) Ashanti’s introduction. (5:30) Devon introduces himself and the organization he founded, Men Creating Peace, which helps men put an end to their abusive behavior. He shares how he overcame his own abusive behaviors and tendencies. (17:20) Ashanti and Devon make their masks together. (25:30) Ashanti shares the front of his mask - dedicated, passionate, caring. (27:15) Devon shares the front of his mask - generous, dependable, open-hearted - and how it helps him connect with others. (30:50) Ashanti shares the back of his mask - caused harm, childhood abuse, domestic abuse at home as a child - and how he realized that hurt he was receiving he was passing on to others. (34:50) Devon shares the back of his mask - mean-spirited, procrastination, insecure/afraid/scared - and how he is working on getting “unstuck” and continuing to overcome fear. (42:20) Ashanti and Devon discuss the concept of the “hitman”, who has been shaped by gender norms and expectations particular to a given society. (49:20) Then, they apply the hitman analogy to school-age young men and boys. (1:02:50) Devon shares how you can get in touch with him. --- Connect with Devon Gaster Website: mencreatingpeace.org Facebook: facebook.com/mencreatingpeace Instagram: instagram.com/mencreatingpeace Twitter: twitter.com/mencreatepeace --- Create your own mask anonymously at www.100kmasks.com If you are interested in being on the Face to Face podcast, email us at [email protected] --- Connect with Ashanti Branch: Instagram: instagram.com/branchspeaks Facebook: facebook.com/BranchSpeaks Twitter: twitter.com/BranchSpeaks LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/ashantibranch Website: branchspeaks.com --- Send in a voice message: anchor.fm/branch-speaks/message
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E64. The Hitman in All of Us - with Devon Gaster, Violence Prevention Advocate
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