Ep 107 Big Book Thumper Leaves AA After 32 Years — Carrie's Story

After 32 years in Alcoholics Anonymous, Carrie walked away from the program she once lived and breathed. A retired VA nurse, dynamic speaker, and hardcore Big Book Thumper, Carrie sponsored thousands and climbed the service ladder—until she started asking herself the one question AA fears most: Do I actually believe this?This powerful conversation dives into indoctrination, service burnout, identity loss, spiritual manipulation, predatory behavior in meetings, and the courage it takes to walk away. If you’re questioning AA, feeling trapped, or just want to hear a brutally honest story of breaking free—this one’s for you.Carrie's substack: https://carrieengland.substack.com/👇 Timestamps00:00 Intro04:02 Indoctrinated into hardcore AA07:38 Core issues under drinking09:20 Drunk on AA Kool-Aid12:20 Cracks in AA brainwashing17:01 Retired VA registered nurse for substance abuse18:28 Elite AA & Getting Fired by a Sponsor22:27 "I feel scammed"26:38 Questioning AA + Sponsor Burnout31:40 Her Big Regret from AA36:40 AA is a Religious Cult37:48 Leaving AA Feels Scary40:41 Predators in AA45:12 The First Days After Leaving50:20 Coming Out Online About Leaving AA53:41 AA Myths She No Longer Believes58:34 What Surprised Her About Leaving1:04:03 Cults Within the Cult1:14:00 Alternatives to AA1:15:10 Is She Still “in Recovery”?1:18:30 Ego, Self-Esteem & Service1:24:25 AA as Self-Medication1:28:06 Learning to Trust Herself AgainJoin our free deprogramming AA Community and get free resources in the 🔓 AA Escape Kit here → 🔓 AA Escape Kit click here💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestieDM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.Let’s get f*cking free.