Alright, so let's just get this straight, okay? We've debated it before, we'll never debate it again. I will introduce the show after you've introduced the show. Alright, that's okay.
I'm not gonna now go, ladies and gentlemen on the cheap show, think you and I say, well I'm the cheap show, they can't even do that. You do it at the front. Yes, fair enough. Get it all out, let's start the show.
Alright, here we go. Hello, welcome to the cheap show everybody. My name's Eli Silverman, it's the Economy Comedy Podcast for your ears. Here's Paul Ganon, and he's here as well.
Hello, I'm Paul Ganon, welcome to the cheap show. Bye, bye to the cheap show. Hey you and your fucking movement, Pussy. Oh, love move.
Well, I'm the cheap show, good and 100%. I'm the boot and toss. Tell us what goes wrong. Say hello.
I'm the cheap show. I'm not going on a nozzle. I'm Paul Ganon, the company Comedy Podcast, cheap show. No, no, no.
No, down for the bargain bins. No, no, no. The lift shops are great Britain, we deliver content to your ears. Oh no, no, no.
I still, no. I did it. There are no thrift shops in Britain. No, there's not.
I need to consolidate what I need to say. Jumble sales? No, cuz ours, no. Jumble, that was to have a ring, give it a Victorian shop.
It's called in S-brick. About howlands and boot sales of Britain. Good. Yeah, and other things as well.
Just put that to catch. Jumble sales. Yeah. So if you never hit podcast before, you might be in for a shock.
It's primarily about... Would you be a jam from a jumble sale? Jam. No.
They do sell jam in jumble sales. Jumble sales. Is that a special kind of sale? Yes.
Yeah. So where they sell jam bell? Is it homemade jam or is it just jam bought off the shelf now? No, mate.
I don't know if I trust it. Was it a farmer's market? Yeah, I might pick up some jam. But at farmer's market, jumble sales.
It was five minutes. That's great jam. Have you ever had Uncle Gumbly? It's a very suspicious jam.
It has very... It's lumpy. I'll give it that. It's yum gritty.
It's lumpy and gritty. It's salty. It's got all wobbly bits. I don't think it's jam.
What do you think it is? I don't know. Do you think it's like pork? Hello.
Welcome to Uncle Gumbly. Oh, no. Here we go. Welcome to Uncle Gumbly's jam house.
Oh, hello, Uncle Gumbly. I'm here from Cheap Show and I just wanted to know all of my listeners are very desperate to know. Yeah. What is in Uncle Gumbly's jam?
Well, come with me. I'll show you. I'm walking there. Right.
Here we go. It's quite humid in here. I like to keep a sweat on. I found being sweaty.
What's that? It's a damp and sweaty. It really kind of keeps the jam. What is that?
Hold it. There's a distinct holder in here as well. It's unwashed. It's the smell of an unwashed bum.
Okay. You know, it's a little bit of a... What? I've diked.
It's where's the special pot that you make a jam. Well, I make it in a pot in the bathroom. Well, this is the kitchen. I just prepare my ingredients, but I take it to the pot, which is in Mr.
Uncle Gumbly's toilet. It makes it all... I'll say it's... Right.
Here we go. It's much drier up here on the first floor. Yeah, well, you've got to. You've got to keep it dry.
The situation is that you can't plan for. Now, are you going to show us what goes into Uncle Gumbly's jam or not? I'm losing patience with you. Okay.
I'm not even sure you're Uncle Gumbly. You might be an unposter. Let me... Unposter.
Here we go. The first ingredient... That I'm going to put in my special pot for this stuff. Fuck.
It seems to be a poo and a duck. That's my first ingredient. You've shot in a pot. Oh.
Mr. Granny. And you're selling me. What about the fruity bits?
Oh, here we go. Here we go. I think I've had enough of this Uncle Gumbly. Would you like a fresh scooper?
No, I don't. I don't want any. No. No.
It's on celery. Oh, really? You can scoop with it. I don't think I'm a self-sick.
That's it. He's made himself gag with his own. Mr. Granny.
He's all the ingredients in his belly. All right. And he makes it all go into his... He shits into the jar.
That's the joke. That's the end point of the sketch, was it? Mr. Granny.
So let me get a straight pull. We've just done a five minute improvisation. And it went exactly where everyone knew it. I mean, there was no pullback of reveal there, wasn't there?
Fuck. That had no tension. We all know. He was an old man and shitting in a jar.
He's lost it. I think he lost pull. Paul, what have we got? I'm desperate for gags.
I know. That's where I'm very sorry, ladies and gentlemen. But that's the show. Shall we get on with it?
Keepshow dirty little show, innit? I reckon cheap show might be the dirtiest, grumpyest podcast. It could be. It's the world.
It's making me feel grubby. Mate, you live in the house of pickles. Every day. This room's getting grosser.
Right. So yeah, we've got price of your ike platter and then we've got a game given to us by chai called Ponderdo. Ponderdo. And we're playing that.
We just don't know. If the game is based on punts, Mr. Punsop, I'm going to be correct. I've got an restraining order against Mr.
Punsop, right now. I was going to, because he has to be stopped. I said to him, he's even me with a wife and your kid and that life. No, I didn't mean that aspect because we're doing a game, which will have lots of punting.
Yeah, no, no, no. But because at the end of the day, he'd turn around and say, I'm a jig-jig-jig-jig. But then a couple of days, like, he sent me a text saying, I miss you. What are you wearing?
And I was like, mate, this has to end. So I have had to put him to play. The protection I need to keep punts up away from me. So there will be puns said.
He won't be allowed to get near him. He won't. And he does. I'm just going to call the police.
And I'm going to tell his fucking wife. All right. Yes. Because she deserves to know.
She deserves to know. She does. I didn't know about it originally. He sends me erotic poetry.
Yeah, but he sends pictures of me and him together when we've been out. Don't you miss the times? You better than my wife and dad. Does pooing or pooing?
No. It involved in this. No, he did offer me some jam. Oh.
That's so wicked. That's it. Let's let that in. Let's let the character carry on the show.
Oh, it's the fucking prize of shard. It's the fucking prize of shard. It's the fucking prize of shard. It's the fucking prize of shard.
It's the fucking prize of shard. It's the fucking prize of shard. And, and, and, and that, that, that, that, that, that, that's right. Okay.
It's the fucking prize of shard. Oh god. The fucking prize of shard. And that, that's right.
Right, Paul. What have you got? All right. This is a traditional prize of shard.
No BFG, no cliffhanger, no nothing. It's just simply a whole school within 25p of the paid price for these items. Right. And you score one point.
All right. Okay. So I'm going to make notes. And if you're dead on, you get two.
And that's it. Yeah. First thing I'm going to talk to is take 25p, you're like, or 50p, just that. All right.
Just checking because we have a green on 25p. We have. And it's important that we do the rules to our best knowledge. Now, I'm just going to turn around and put this on for you to give you the full effect and say, Oh, I bet middle of Jesus.
I am your father. It's a Deaf's mask. What is his name? Deaf Eddie Vedder.
Eddie Vedder. The singer out of fucking that bad. Yeah, Eddie Vedder. It's Darth Eddie Vedder.
It's a Darth. Ladies and gentlemen, I'm being funny. Well, I'm not. It's Darth Vader mask.
It's so it is. And now the Isilment will now do one of the most famous scenes from Star Wars. You like something with you. Luke, I am your father.
Prove it. Look at my really. It's big like yours. Seen.
Let me just get that straight. You did a sketch up. Well, exactly where you thought it was going to go. No, I thought it was going to go there.
I thought it was going to go there. Oh, I thought it was going to go there. All right. I thought it was going to make a comment about your big shiny helmet.
No. We'll do the scene again. Let's do the scene exactly like it is in the movie. No.
I am your father. No, it's not. It is. It's not.
Look at this poo I've done. Right. Great. Look at that.
Smells bad, don't it. Get down that hole. You're bested. I lost it, Paul.
You know what? This mask is made for a child and it's pressing quite hard on my temples. How's your breathing going? It's very Darth Avery.
Yeah, but it's not on purpose. It's taking it off. Yeah, good. It's Darth Vader mask.
It's a Darth Vader mask. That is the first. No. Can I ask you to get the eye pads?
Eye gills. It's the only thing that shows that it's second hand. It's got a bit of wear. And screws by the mouth.
Okay. The paint's kind of the way. The screws by the mouth. But it is quite good.
It's all right for it. It's Darth Vader's face. Now, can I ask a question? We're all being bought from the same chair shop.
Can I ask you what? Northland and Hospice. Okay. Good, good, good.
One in crown chair. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. All right.
So, how's your first item? Darth Vader. I don't know. First mask.
Star Wars. They can probably get away with charging a bit more than usual for that. It is second hand. As you can see.
Yeah. The way on the screws. I'm going to say I'm on the value of this one. I'm going to say 150.
150 for that. 150 for the dark. Right. What's the next?
Lazy. Well, we're straight down to business. The straight down to business. Oh, it's a lovely mug.
It's a mug. Bright and early coffee. Waking up in the morning. I quite like the colouring.
I like waking up to a bit cotton in the morning. What do you think of it as a mug for? No, I like the shape of this kind of mug. It's a wiper mug, isn't it?
It's a beef and flat. It's nothing remarkable. It's a nice mug. It's a nice mug.
It's got that sort of oldie-timey. It's got that. It's all deckery almost. Almost.
Kind of psychedelic almost. You've got very bright greens, reds and blues. You know, like front doors in the 1950s had glass paneling and they always had those kind of colours. It's a bit plain glass.
TV show. On BBC, educational history. How we used to live? That's what graphics with that.
Design is that. It's stained glass. No, no, but art style is that. Maybe.
Art Nouveau was just before Deco. Okay. So, 30s, 40s? Yeah, 30s.
Okay. Which would make sense because it was built around a bit of a second world war. Or before the second world war probably would have had that influence in it. A very influential on the early psychedelic poster designers.
Yeah, yeah. Turns into the lettering sort of all flowing and weird. Mind if I don't like ports on like soap posters. I think that's actually what they've got is an actual brand of coffee, which they just used the label for this mug.
Maybe. Look at the box, it says Premiere. And that's a brand company. They've owned all sorts of brands.
No, I don't think Premiere and Premiere brands are the same thing. So what's Premiere? Premiere in? No, it might be a place that makes shit.
Got the record, Premiere. Because Premiere brands, you write things down everything. They end up taking a bit of Cadbury's and stuff. One of you work for Cadbury's and 80s.
I don't think so. Because they've done your own bright and early coffee. No, but my point is, wouldn't they just call it Premiere brands? Probably just say Premiere, because it's never called Premiere.
Possibly. But it's like, you know, I've got this Tabasco t-shirt. Yeah. It doesn't say Tabasco hot sauce.
It says Tabasco branded products. Yeah. Because it's owned by Tabasco. No, it's not the name of a company.
Yeah. For some reason, I thought it was the name of a vegetable. It is the name of a pepper as well. Oh, they've trademarked an actual strain of peppers.
I didn't know you could do that. Yeah, it's weird. They've gone very long, that's one of the oldest hot sauce companies ever. Oh, are you going to like, I'll give you that.
What, what, I need a price from you? Oh, for the bright and early coffee mug. I'm going to say, because cups and mugs can go 10 of penny, Charlie. So I'm going to say 75p.
75p. Classic cheap show, classic price of shite. I'm sure you'll agree. Here's our next item.
Is it the last one? No. Oh, shit. It's a vinyl of Ghostbusters.
It's a single. It's a single. It's a single. I recently found the 12 inch of this in a chat shop.
Now, the reason I picked this up is it's quite in quite a nickel. I don't think I have one which actually has the picture cover. And you notice the difference between the signs and logo between this logo and the one in the title. Look at the logo.
They go the other way. Yeah. Why is that? Well, this is the thing.
I think I've talked about this before. I think I've talked about this before. It's actually pointing a different way outside of it. It's because, okay.
That's, go ahead. Go ahead. Go ahead. Go ahead.
In the UK, most of the marketing have the ghost facing any other directions. Yeah. And it just, that's correct. But it doesn't look right.
Do you know the name of the artist who designed it? Yeah. Of course he grows. Has he done any other work of note?
Yes. Really? So he worked for National Lampoon. You know the famous famous shot of the dog with the gun against his head as the front cover of National Lampoon.
It looked like a big shocker. He helped sell the magazine. He worked for, oh, we killed the dog. Yeah.
That famous thing. He did that artwork. He was a few years ago now, a few years ago, a few years ago, there was a study done of people who'd worked for the New York Design Technology Community College, wherever it is. Yeah.
It was a very clever piece of design, wasn't it? It was a very early example of selling a film on an icon. Yes. But that's kind of gone out of fashion now.
I think it reached its height with Batman, didn't it? It reached its height with Batman, you could argue Jurassic Park. Just because you just see the symbol appear before you know the film's even coming. Yeah.
And that's what the ghost was. Before they did a single bit of advertising, all you got was back post there and coming July, that night and eight forward, whatever it was, and then that on. Now, it's got the ghost classic Ghostbusters facing the other way on the cover. And then it says the block of busting theme from the ghost busting movie.
I think that terrible coffee, isn't it? Then on the back, you have a still shot from the pop video of the song. I'd say. Yeah, it is.
And he's got Ray Parker Jr. there. He's dancing. It's interesting, when they shot the video, they were like, let's just get in our jumpsuits and drive around and film bits on the street.
They didn't have a lot of money. So they grabbed it and then they filmed all those videos with the inserts from Chevy Chase and John Candy and such. Yeah, you can see, this is in extremely good nick. It's a very good condition, actually.
And the cover, you don't often find it with a picture cover in fact to that extent. No. Which is why I picked it up. I want this.
Good. I've got one anyway. I've got an album which is called Safe in the Spirit. The B-side of the B-side of the 7-inch single, this version is just the instrumental version of the ghost busting movie.
Yeah, it's got a little bit longer. Well, it would be. So 12. No, no, I mean the B-side is a little bit longer.
It's a bit longer. It's the same version of the instrument on the album. It should be a little bit longer because it has a slightly longer middle section and then it tails off and you hear the Ecto one side and it goes towards the end. It doesn't actually have a time on it.
What does it say on the actual sleeve? On the sleeve, it doesn't have a time either. Ah, I'm afraid. But if it's the same version as that feature on the OST, then it will probably be slightly longer.
I would guess. You know what? Just by looking at the groove. Just by looking at the groove in the margin, I'd say you're right.
Yeah. It's not much added, but again, slightly longer middle section, slightly longer. How much did I pay for this? I'd say very good plus copy of the Ghostbusters thing tune.
I would say I would say a quid. Now are you ready for your last item? I am ready for my last item. Get the price off here.
Yeah. It's a fresh shot today. Fresh shot fresh off the branch. This is a I don't like this human contact.
It's an emoji. It's an angry Pacman. No, it's an emoji. Oh, I'm gone.
It's a magic eight ball. It's an angry Pacman magic eight ball. It's an angry emoji. Sorry, an angry emoji.
It's yellow though. It's a yellow ball. It's yellow. It's a ball.
Sorry. Forgive me. Retro gaming community. We know everything is.
Oh, it's sky dark and three with its little slime gun. But the slime gun is not right. Oh, I'm cool. I'm boring.
Oh. You've finished being a divvy. I'm a divvy, am I? You're a divvy.
You're a wilt-wor. You're a wazook. You're a plump. You're a gooseberry.
You're an onion. You're a monkey. You're an egg. You're a daft biscuit.
You're a sausage sandwich. You're a leaf with a little bit of snail on it. You're a googly wooly. Oh.
Right. Well, let's get the magic eight ball action going. You need to ask a question. They can't.
I can rub it for you. You can rub it and you can shake it in your hands and you can shake it up and down and you can just shake it viciously. Yeah. Can I just say, oh, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, I want to show you.
Josh, my little knob off will Eli have sex in 2019? Shakey shakey shakey shakey shakey shakey shakey shakey shakey. What about you? What about me?
Not listening. Oh, it's good again. Magic and those people. That was that a standard one?
No, I bet it's all trendy fucking buzzwords. It's a bit runzy with me. Oh, it's like the raw Internet isn't it like it's love hearts. brand itself to be like lol oh whatever yeah I was never enough I can't sit on anyway there's dirty love I got my knob on this love up with your mince on my tits anyway will he like have sex it was your but toilet just use another level of sex bubble this lover into your snatch on the angle won't go hold it won't be prospects low well what a little shit there are prospects right I prospect what you can ask it will poor yeah move houses you know what's like the move up a lot of I'm saying all right in two thousand I'd rather not those fucking depressing moving haha as if maybe not why is it not you is a can't do it why is that fucking attitude it's the least favorite item for both sides not listening like you go I'm not listening and also why I've got an angry emoji is like oh it's like sarcastic magic a boy you go will my money survive the illness you say you have a hahaha as it right have had a lie got prowess in all areas anything very broad no you not haha exactly what I'm asking about me ask let yourself well I ever get a striptease from Britney Spears in my lifetime I keep it broad no shit given it all down you break it on my bed and it's poisonous magic apple fluid a ball shit what do you think that cost people never gonna get my toxic strictly like I've imagined in my head many times no one needs to know this oh baby baby baby baby oh love to toxic I think that was too quit to quit no no and quit just a quit okay just a quick so let's wrap this up right here we go it's time to reveal how many points you scored any point on the price of show I don't know how I feel I'll be honest usually I'm not confident so much is like resigned you don't know that you don't know what death mass death mass no Darth Vader mask any better mask did you just fall no that's not in no way how dare you if I when I'm at I will edit I edit this show I know I will be listening now actually all 15 minutes in 40 seconds section about whether or not you lay off a little Tommy Woof dirt I also wouldn't do that I thought I wouldn't do that I thought I didn't do this I don't have some civility and this less little conversation but no no no no no in that case can I have a follow up question why this room suddenly smell of beefy death there must be some activity going on past I've got plants or in the source all of sources oh it's got Paul you know what I'm frightened of all in case I follow through yeah that's what everyone needs to hear yeah oh I'm putting the Darth Vader this is like horrible podcast I'm putting it off of protection yeah because it's beefy look you have let off put the droid in first so it's a solid that made it I forced it out now I love you oh oh dad no I punch up thanks thanks I love you Paul you can't do the voice I'm not like your voices you're not like mine alright fucking oh right death mask it's not a death mask can you get the fucking name of anything right Vader helmet mask I said one pound fifty how much was it 75p oh so I'm out by 50 yeah so nothing the quite good that was really good because I thought it's all so they might you know the price no they didn't they saw it for the piece of useless tattoo is yeah all right cool all right all right the cock mug was the next thing you said I said 75 p pad oh I got a point for that point yeah that's all right yeah all right a quick good for that I reckon every couple of them on that shelf every cup was a mug on that shelf that's what you just said every cup every mug was a grid yeah so ghost bus the single was a mug I'm a glass and also a container got a good question so you know there's like bisexuality right what someone said to you I'm a bi bisexual what would that mean I was trying to think of how the logic of that would work doesn't would a bi bisexual mean they're all sexual well free quarters because I was trying to be the opposite it would be bi bisexual mean they're only half are being bi which means they're straight a bi bisexual pool yeah it's when you have a shag and you I'm a bit you clean it up yeah I'll leave a little drippy trail on the way out leaky again it's all about mess with him ghost bus the single I said a quid it was a quid oh two points not bad yeah all right and finally the eight eight mile hopeful emoji eight ball hateful eight ball yes thank you what do you say I said quit for that as well it's 75 p no it's a point for this so out of a possible what eight I got four yes half half of you that not too bad not too bad I know what you favorite item today well honestly yeah you know you can't go to support you know you can actually kind of like the Darth Vader mask yeah for it is it's fine it's not too bad is it kiddies have fun they've been by gone to the whole oh like teen yeti doing the voice oh hello and see maybe I just couldn't help but uh put out a very unique voice do you want to do some other version yes mr yeti we'd like to have a man with talents on the show like going on flatter me now huh no I'm too yeah yeah now let's see if you can get this one Paul yeah whack a whack a whack a whack a whack a whack a it's a fonzie bear take my wife I don't know actually take her away and then dispose of her oh yeah that's all they'll have teen yet he's a I have to do that in a bag of shit one more keep for getting a big bag of shit one more one more I don't like a drink but like just make it as I say with with eyes miss money penny who's that then did you get that one that is the sound of you never being invited back on cheap show to you right I'll go off now I'm working on a album I'm going to hold a collection prong it's a prog album prog yeti it's called smoke so snow in my in my yeti pipe yep still what convinced that character work so let's just crack on with the next part of the show Silverman's Platter's is our next section we've got two lovely singles to choose from one LP one single today Paul right so what have you got for us I'll bring them over to you let's start with the big one the LP yeah this is on Edmar Records actually when did you find this out of interest I found this in that huge thrift store oh in America yes oh it was in a place called Lakeworth in Southern California and Southern California California love no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no can you not do that please I'm mr.
Grumbly no you're not mr. Grumbly and I've got a new meganese for you possible to get the sketch it's come good I'm glad mr. Grumbly we still wrapped up there yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah so this is the first LP the first LP yeah well the only LP on this edition of it Silverman's Platter Platter it is and it's as if it was dripped up in the dream of the imagination of the mad fucking what I literally saw you go I know your eyes said what the fuck am I saying and then your brain exploded ah well I'll try that again yeah sorry and for the first record on today's Silverman's Platter it's a real splatter pattern just keep it simple alright and today Paul yeah the first disc on Silverman's Platter is a real splatter platter nice and it's as if it was from the world imagination of the mad matter right platter yeah it's when you're green you have a clean now when you mention this to me I thought oh is it a Kermit the Frog Muppet thing or is it is not easy being green no I know I was just how clean it is no but it's not easy but before I said it's not perhaps it's not easy because you get all ganja yeah it's because you know it's not easy clean yeah mr. Grumbly special magic jam green sauce what's that oh fast forward to the end of the sketch it's vomit it's chunky vomit it's like lumpy acidic fizzing steamy vomit but it's lovely on pizza it looks at charm right this is when you're green you're clean and the group is called Johnny Green and the green men now what is striking about this is the cover which is a pack I mean that's Johnny Green isn't it on the go of the time you think it might be Johnny Green but there are two other guys yeah but that looks like I don't know Unpulumpa John Lennon and this looks like that looks like Paul Daniels son it looks like Paul Daniels son if he was raised on a Texas trailer park yeah and she's just lovely lady nothing really wrong with that green hair all I've green hair because Johnny said you're not be great for our band it's great great we're green green green just say green a lot and there's a green flower on the drum kit she's got a green thing and it's onion we've got an onion smell as well doesn't all like that but onions spray right and I'll spray the onion around and everyone will associate this amount of green onions Johnny green and the green so it's a it's a full sensual show it's very sensual and we've got yeah a conjurer fucking out like looking for it so I want him I want the fucking illusionist I want the woman with the green hair get him on my cruise ship and I want a smell of green onions we'll call the show green onions and rock and I've met this guy he's called Mr.
Grumbles he's got a whole line of products and we could we could peddle them on the side now Mr. Grumbles you've got anything green yes special green salcer that's for the end it's not okay now I've got a supply for you but you must keep it warm oh they are in multinational I'm looking at the back cover they're in multinational Johnny Green yeah production on piano from Florence Italy Carlo Morangon Tim Barlays from the Philippines Chris LeDare and photography Peter Tillya from England boring here's a little clip of what they like to listen to this is I think I'm gonna play that bad bad boss one big boss man because he only want to go go go go go go go go go because that was awful at least big boss man is some semblance of being listenable so here's a little clip of that you're just a lot of the one tune that wasn't written by them I really know what I explain to why it's fucking off yeah but here's the thing okay so from listening to that and listening to the album right I tell you what let's play a little quick clip of the first track on it you know the way from the US let's play a little bit that exemplifies what they like as an act USA USA USA USA now to me I listen to that right and I think it's proficient it sounds like the kind of music you get what you've got proficient what do you call me to a session session session players so it's good but it lacks heart it lacks energy it like it sounds on identity yeah there's nothing inherently bad about it but it sounds like the band get ponto's milk toast it's very very weak it doesn't commit to any one style enough to actually make it sound authentically that's so I'll do you know yeah it's fascinating because you read the back and it says some to the effect of all their on all these TV shows they were huge yeah because they were middle of the road they get there you know they're white that helps that helps get on all family shows do you think they're colorized this photographs and make it look like they've got green hair no they died they're great did really and that no he told them he told them that we had to do this guys says I'm not gonna fucking do it yeah and that's what you sure how many colorize it looks like it's just sort of on the back it says he encouraged his band members to color their hair green and wear green costumes which as you know green is a beautiful color to look at you know what I mean it's really nice it's not off-putting at all and with the orange and deep browns they look like 1930s stained glass window they look like a nightmare like he had a nightmare there was a band they were cruise lines it's got they work on the cruises don't they without being too humorous about it but make it apart they actually look like how unple uppers dress in in the jimwild they're really wrong they're doing it you know I mean that's exactly what the look is and at some point along the line they picked up an illusionist yeah and said well let's put a magician in our rock act now even though we're green band we're very beige so how do we spice it up I know let's add a magician to it because what people need while we're doing our soft middle of the road boogie woogie is a terrible country it's one pulling a rabbit out of a fucking house they do the disappearing lady trick or the yeah cut a lady in half trick there yeah folks on the back good old standard trick Bernard Reed who's obviously the magician with Johnny Green in the green men in a scene from their internationally famous show the illusion review but as far as we know international just means they did that show on a cruise ship it's famous internationally because we're in international waters so they have some that were from the USA minute of your time ooga booga your green when you're green your clean which apparently is there a like yeah like people they were on Batman TV series apparently it says here they signed a contract to appear in a back in the Batman TV series of 20th Century Fox where they appeared in the series with Cesar Omeo and his henchmen they're that kind of band that would appear in the background of a 60's TV show they did overseas tours in Vietnam for the troops and they were guests of honor for the mr. and mrs. Nixon oh god and they had a movie called the ballad of Billy blue they're very right way not they like they're worse than that they're just every fan they're in every band they'll do it for Nixon and go oh it's just good for a pro party to any gig don't they just do a bunch of gigs but it's hard to hate it but at the same time we just think yeah it's very middle of the road very terrible I've picked it up because they all had green hair I mean fair enough and that picture with the conjurer as well we never followed up we never followed up but you know you bought that a patch album and you had a guess of what it was we never actually clarify what it ended up being on the show did we not know we thought it was gonna be like a cross-ep yeah we thought it was gonna be like Italian disco what I hoped it was what was it it was Italian novelty comedy duo spoken word over music and so it was in Italian so we couldn't really tell it was very long-lived comedy duo 30 years or something loads of albums in one of those kind of comedy album groups bands I don't know what I call them but the baronites maybe no it seems to me more like something that an actor like for instance you know Bruce McCaller from kids in the hall he brought out to a major comedy album that I kind of spoken word but also musical music on as well they were brilliant so it can look at in that vein but you can't you won't ever know because we don't speak to anyone's Italian and they won't listen to it because it's probably on YouTube to be fair tell us it's funny or not what is it called a rapper hoe by Apache or Apache or a rapper hoe barber who's the artist who's the artist it was Apache well doesn't matter it doesn't matter so I need a score for Johnny Green and the green I'm gonna give that green you're clean one and a half platters I'll give it one platter it's very bad it's bad but it's not offensive it's not like Ross Abbott's disco out where it's just everything about it makes you want to talk your heart out and there are some sort of jam things where you can tell they can play all right they just got no direction but there's no one to it's like that big bad boss song there's no room for is there some oft which is a sort of we tasted and we're gonna meet us would you say that Johnny and the Green Man's album when you're green you clean has the kind of uft that you get when you put off onto your penis no it needs uft it needs a lot of off to pour down its meters yeah so much better with who would do a really good cover of that you know like who would do like Otis Redding Wilson pick it up from Saltinger yeah you know like that would give it the beans that's what I'm saying yeah well that comes across as jelly week Lily delivered are you ready for the second platter I serve him as platters this week Paul yeah it's the pop conchator orchestra with Eden is a magic word and it sounds almost exactly like this I open my eyes look around I stand up I walk yes I walk can see the sky but I feel I feel I can see a flower and the sun up in the sky all around it's the world I feel alone in my mind either is a from 1982 and it has a picture of a lady in a wet top yeah and on the cover I'll be honest it's not a great track but you know what I really like it there's something about it it's got it's it's sort of like one of those spoken word beginnings found myself you know there was no sky and then I went into the cupboard the cupboard smells of cobwebs water for was was golden I'm pretty sure he says he opened up his arse the beginning but I'm right Christmas that oh right what I need to go to the low do yeah we're gonna power on through this segment all right so I want to make you squirm in it now you did a bit of research on this Paul so from what I understand pop concerto orchestra right we're a French band that's so mostly in English okay they released that many tracks as far as I could see but the one that they released had a big hit on it called she is the rainbow which is the B side of this because originally these songs were both released in the late 70s but they use the B side the one that we played on this clip called word Eden where it is to sell this thing called what's it called telefunco music original do spot TV telefunco so that was called a TV spot for a company that made radios and transistors called telefunky yes telefunky I seem to remember it's like a high-five company yes so they use that music in an advert to sell that product and it's a single basically that was released in 82 and then put the A side on the B side and the B side on this version she wears a rainbow quite humorous as well let's play a little bit of that isn't he like Andrew rare but issue where did not be put in a peel round oh you know it's got it's got a pop-up sort of it got an on pop-up are we kind of thing what's interesting to me is that it sounds like they're affecting that so it's hard to explain but you know there's like a type of singing that happened in the 70s when a lot of bands a lot of songs released on album like top of the pop so just very good covers of the original hits but those male voices had a weird northern sound to them like a professional club singer voice right but you like start on 45 so it's sort of like a club review style almost it's like the singer sounds like he's affecting that middle of the road he kind of clubs style yeah in the club style yeah not quite like that yeah so it's interesting I genuinely enjoyed both tracks although they're not great they're not great I prefer she wears a rainbow bit because it's got I think I do and they've both got a bit of a sort of beatless beat like a dealier sort of yeah but very much middle of the road psychedelic so of plastic so I can't go around the world it kind of goes all that's something we can trippy in a bit kind of sotting peppery in a bit transient a bit folky then it comes all the way understanding that and then it's not again you know it's a lot of naff around it but there's a fog of now now poor this is one from that collection you can see there's a little gold sticker yeah these could service which was on a certain road you got the address there which is obviously the shop or or or or perhaps a rental rental vinyl place I think at some point you could actually yeah but look I love the designs on this disc service that's just it might be a rest rental it's a song I bought a load of them and they all like a German and French singles and they all have that sticker on it's a lovely stick on it I like it's a little moments that I like on in vinyl vinyl where's its history often people write little messages draw little pictures if they look at names on it they'll put their names because they used to imagine you said go around someone's house have a party and you're like where's my where's my now 17 you know I mean oh have you got it you have got it you fucking rip oh fuck you I'll rip his mouth out that's he send us for you I was all abuse weekly right so I like that I'm gonna get honestly you're gonna be surprised I'm gonna get that four out of five I give it three I like that now do we also think just one final point there's woman who's actually cloud lady in the sea on the cover yeah is from the advert is it still from the ad it could be maybe but also they could have thought we got to sell the single how do we do it and some French man went put the sexy woman in a team no no they sat down they drank the coffee and then one went you put tits on it I was like yeah all right racist at all we all know you hate the French somebody making more jam the character we've we've done two episodes of day poor and not our best word I mean I'm saying that but other people like a bunch of them something that has survived yeah is Mr.
Gumbly we need a character who made jam out of his body fluids you know that Mr. Grambley is felling a brand new and brand new icon but it's not food it is Mr. Grumbly's older Twilight oh it's a perfume that's what the end thoughts anyway here I go yeah so that's a lot of platters from another week I'm a good one yeah right yes we are good this is the final second of the show and it's a political my favorite part because I like I think I'm a real big board game nerd or game nerd I've just you always were I used to be more into computer games no never I got digitized because before wanted to work with me really that's important you used to work as a game journalist for about two years on a Nintendo magazine Nintendo bought a game wanted that was never my wife's drive to get into games and since that magazine you were on Gamesmaster yeah but I wanted to be on the telly right and as a result there's a 13 year old me on TV who's heartbreaks in front of a live audience and you just got a bit trigger happy I just got a bit trigger happy that's going I make a mess with that one too t-shirt and own it yes just got a bit ticker happy and a picture of my 13 year old face just far away from tears for the camera coming to the diamond what we got then this is donated to me by Chai Chai who is one of the listeners of the show and he came to see me and Jim do some fine lorry readings for his book I'm still in 2018 mindset yeah you got to start putting it on your checks yeah checks and balances no you checks when you check yeah take a look at us Spanish wrinkles no no no no no I put up a grumbly at least he got what he got last from who everyone people listening hello hello dear my little she's a knock off the spring cold I don't know you're talking about you do I don't like her you're Mr. Silverman I won't get rid of this one I won't be able to put your sprinkles with her about it I don't think I should get her out I won't answer madam lady plot yes dear I'll kick her out thank you love now I was going late some ploppings well I've got a sprinkles again no one likes her I don't we'll see any proof of granny sprinkles catching on we'll see the same way as Jimmy sprinkles I just let you out get out who I'll go then bye bye right so oh catch the last night by the way you like you fucking it made love to yourself using that voice didn't yet oh no madam sprinkles don't mention it it's fine it's a pleasure sad pathetic tell you what I tell you what Paul yeah after last night yeah she'll be sprinkling for a week that's disgusting she's she's she's sprinkles I hope she takes a thing to lady stopping well she's gone now good I hope you have it where's like where's madam plop she left a do go because she got some self respect fucking dignity Madam lady plops I think what we all need to see she's no is a is a death match between sprinkles v plot blobs yeah with the theme to try by Franky yes I'm gonna look very little bit of releases of that there a lot like yeah a different single they were trying to milk it as much as possible I genuinely there was so many different verses I do that it's really fucking epic I can't remember any other chains apart for Frankie says relax and two tribes and don't put your door to the stage mrs.
Worthington that's you're right now I'm on the back I can't think of any other songs I don't think of any other songs they weren't any other songs no they're most of the bin they were huge no there's two tribes and Frankie says relax and two tribes are the follow up to Franky says relax I guess that's a good point no the power of love was that Franky was definitely Paul Gorman who's Frankie Hollywood what is name who's the sky from Frankie I thought that was Mark Oman's no no mama was from soft sell what we do it for the last section of the show Paul are we all about talking all about talking all my man talking now anyway give us a game and it's called Pundedome and what's interesting is that it's it's we're not gonna play for all it's gonna have a bit of a laugh but the idea is that this is based on a sketch show in America they managed to mark it their live comedy show it says at the back here in the instruction booklet let me read out Pundedome a history before Pundedome was a card game it started a wild and crazy live monthly Pund competition in Brooklyn New York created and hosted by comedian Joe Feistone and here Rodney Dangerfield impersonator dad Fred Feistone maybe that was a joke though hey whoo hey what hey that's my impression it's good Pundedome has been what you're doing I'm listening to you you're making a noise I'm not making a noise I think you're making a noise fuck it put it on within part of the New York comedy scenes since 2011 you can check out their website for coming dates so there you go to it's based on a comedy like but what happens is there's his fresh on book board fresh in car well I'm just in box I imagine it won't put a charity shop because it was bought for Christmas and they were like I'm gonna play that so fair enough one of those kind of you know like it's what I go to you try to stop shopping just after the Christmas period it's very fruitful often it's really quite for Cunded you called me for Cunded and then you just use it in a positive way I don't know what I mean like that word is I think I was all like episode 14 to be honest Fekhand is is freak and fruitful it's but anyway virile right verdant all the things that your ball bag is not so the idea is get two packs of cards in this game and on one set of cards you have like a topic okay technology rock and roll the 50s yeah my injuries right and on the second stack of cards you get I guess lots of topics like talking points like drinking getting even dressing getting arrested in case like you know like things that happen events events that happen to the end of the event so the idea is you pick two around the one from each pile and you have to make a pun out of it ah-hah so the example they gave on the back of the box is this one pulled out the card saying colors right and then someone else pulled out another card that says mine injuries so they come up with a pun where nice stuff my toe I yell ow yell ow yell ow yell ow and it says here the type of puns you can get away with if you're not sure what pun is rhyming think about words you associate with dogs bones houses leashes right next pick one of those words in brainstorm rhymes how about bark bark grams of nark and lark or dark so maybe you can finally phrase it with what connected to watching television and your pun becomes Nickelodeon's thing about bringing back one of their classic TV shows but this time only targeting dog audiences it's gonna be called off you afraid of the bark fuck it up homophones excuse me two words that sound the same but have different meanings so you know like flower and flower and so someone else picks up if you pick it up you know dogs again and TV the pun they come up with is the television so I was watching was on pause pause feet and hooves yeah and making up words take a word later dog let's say terrier terrier sounds a lot like terror if you want to relate to watching television you can connect the word terror to watching reports about terrorists on the news and I have to do is replace terrorists with terrier terrorists and you have a pun that combines dogs and watching TV by making up one word it seems like every day I'm watching reports about terrier terrorists on the news now admittedly these are very dumb puns but please remember we're not going for gold we're going for groans so it is the credit card logic what is that I meant cracker otherwise I credit card that's weird the cracker logic yeah cracker you have actually poor you've lost no the cracker joke logic is like there are no intentionally good jokes and crackers because if you get good when anyone else is poor then it kind of throws off the bounds of the conversation at the party so everyone has a poor joke everyone's united in that sense excuse made up by people it's apparently true so they don't want people to feel left out because they got a crack check and you've got the funny one basically yeah it's a theory so there are two types of packers and I go are we yeah how long do we get oh let's just have a little old on the dome fun off well you smoke a fact because that's professional you sat there always somebody don't I don't presume you listen to me why we're doing that did you I did listen did you heard all of it yeah yeah did you test yeah this is it now we're doing it fine dog no I got it no you just pick a card it ran them from the pile say stop where you want stop right now say stop whatever you want stop okay so take the bottom card what does that say the Olympics all right so that's your topic the yeah now the second pack you say stop what you want stop okay and then say stop stop take that card working what is that so working and the Olympics right so now you want to make a point about those two cards so let's see how it goes well yeah we've been quite poor poor at the moment poor yeah and so my other half she's had to go out working a strip club yeah she's been pole vaulting dancing round dear old dear old dear no no hang on you got out there think of this so Olympics and working you know I said something about Polish people the other day yeah my job I got the sack race fuck it out fuck here now we've you know what's happened Paul we've exposed one of my weakness can I have another two cards please let's see if you can get on me right just say when oh yeah pick one dating all right date you know a lot about that I'm an expert is my top tip yeah he's a breath mid right there's an x-y-o yeah stop right and take that card so what have you got reptiles right so reptiles it's interesting isn't it and dating so here we go I'm a modern man yeah because the other night the bill came I was on a date the bill came lovely lady yeah she had quite a hard shell mmm but I think I penetrated the shell with my conversation that's when the bill came mmm I said let's split the turtle we'll split the turtle the turtle because I'm a modern man that's good doesn't that's a question I'm genuinely not sure is a turtle a lizard it's a reptile oh it's reptile lizard okay okay reptiles a bigger clay than there is a larger group than just lizards okay and you know people think the dinosaurs were lizards because the word originally dinosaur means fearsome lizard yeah but they're not actually lizards funny I want to take you the day or the woman who turned out to be a lizard right her name was Amanda but a forename was Talamander that's good but it doesn't work because salamanders are amphibians oh right right let's try that one oh there's jokes on the back how did the facial hair begin is interrogations I must ask you a question pull pull pull pull pull pull pull pull what kind of food to please me don't know Irish do Irish do right you do some I'm loving this okay so desserts is that's lots of scope for desserts you'd think so all sorts of scoops for desserts and now I'm gonna run a ray train of panoramic a run a ray train I'm gonna take that card there I can't talk proper and this is hitchhiking so hitchhiking and desserts okay so not as easy as it seems is it I was going I was hitchhiking the other day yeah there's going I was going home as hitchhiking oh and I'm on the phone out and then all of a sudden this big bowl on four wheels comes by it was a bowl on four wheels yeah he goes no I tell you what I was in there show where's this bowl of four wheels hitchhiking I went to this man oh oh no where was he who's made he was made of jelly where was he standing on the side of the road I was hitchhiking yeah the man comes in in a car he comes in where you outside so I'm going to France right and I see right he's like going to Paris and you don't know what will go to Paris you want to come with me and he was made out of like bread and jelly and cream and I was like oh where you take me to a car is it trifle tower whoa that's terrible terrible let me have a go no you've had two goes I want to go do another one that one and then get this one that random any old car any old card any other your car farming and pets right so farming and pets yeah I'm allergic to farm animals but I inherited one oh yeah yeah it was bad because I'm allergic so I got to Harry bollocks what pull well this is you failing abjectly failing I didn't do but you do one with farming and pets okay then for me okay I would it's hard actually that one yeah yeah I've got a dog yeah he likes to he likes to obviously some food instead of saying bow well he says power plow come on come on Paul I did one though didn't I say stop how plow stop that one rock and roll oh here we go tonight say stop oh stop there's that one for you talk what is it punishing right so punishing and rock and roll I've got one well I was in class the other day and it was lunch time yeah and I said to the teacher oh miss Francis chuck us a berry chuck as a berry and she punished me very severely by swanking the hard it was went from joking to fantasy rock and roll and punishing I got one I hear this mean Bill Haley never used to get on that we used to get in fights quite a lot so one day I beat him up I put a rock around his car dead that's not being something up that's what I told him off I put a rock around this cock you have to smash this cock in rock I put his cock on a table I took a rock and I smashed it into the table until it was just flat brush another one yeah I had to you know what I was teaching a teaching a class yeah day of original rock and rollers yeah yeah and one of my students Eddy very very naughty yeah and I had to physically punish him is this a fantasy again you got physically punished him yeah by if I was I physically punished him by I'm the monkey not happy with this one I physically punished Eddie I physically punished Eddie on reflection that is probably a racist character yeah the monkey shouldn't do the monkey yeah really bad I just like the voice this is gonna be a chance of formula I'm teaching a class of early rock and rollers the other day yeah Dixam had a read and write yeah and one of those very misbehaving Eddie he's called and I think I'll have my revenge on him because he's very disruptive I don't want to punish him now in front of the others I'll secretly have a relationship with him and infect him with gonorrhea and I said Eddie Eddie you think great I'm not a bull to fire no that works as well Eddie what's along with it oh I'm Eddie in my cock runs my cock run I'm Eddie cock run runs all seeping all running money seeping cock more right cocktails and dressing oh okay that's good yeah I can't get these underpants on their tarts they're martini they're tarts that's what are you doing it's a screwdriver I want to ask for a suit but named after martini oh yeah yeah I want to put it on I didn't like it let me shake it but not sir can we stop this I'm gonna do one more to prove I'm putting my hand stop it doesn't even show his face because legally not to next here we go anything would qualify as a pun reading and dinner I got one yeah something about peas peas and cues I've recently been trying to make a bunch of meals based on famous works of literature oh yeah yeah so I've got one cool war in peas yeah and a tale of two chickpeas all right I've got else all of her twizzles all of the pretzels I've got what else you got what else I've got the wild rice I've got all of the world rice all right fucking hell fucking the diary of Anne Frankfurter so we stop the show now let's not one more and it's gonna be this it is I have a meal based on a book and it's called great expectations sorry ladies up for another week can I just say I'm sorry I've was a bit under the weather this week and like so excuse it I'm sorry I apologize for Paul's monkey antics I didn't realize the connotations of much too late I tried to tell you right the beginning of the show didn't try very hard did you you know I'm gonna see this one actually makes a complete awful fucking dick of himself I didn't have to wait did that to have the point being that the show's now over hi if you would like to follow us on Twitter you can at Paul Ganon show at the cheap show or the Eli is I'm a Eli's noise which is spelled E li so no idea you also have a website where you can see pictures and sometimes videos that I complete each and every episode and that is that is the cheap show co dot UK or now thanks to one lovely lovely listener it is now cheap show co dot UK as well and do you preface that with www you can if you would like to do it to me now that would be that would be the cheap show co dot UK also if you'd like to put the show in any way you'd like financially you can make a picture like many other podcasts and YouTube channels were asking for money it's weird but genuinely without your help we would be running right now and be weekly so thank you I love you patreon patrons patreon.com forward slash cheap show there's little as much as you want it's all to you every little helps we're not that strictly true though is it what you can't go less than a dollar no well there's little as little as a dollar as much as they want yeah and what else what else yeah we're on tumblr on Facebook we're on Instagram just look for cheap show you'll likely find us or you'll find that American weird punk band one of the other Eli do you have anything to say no well you can still watch me on YouTube on Digitizer 6 episodes up now working on second series lovely am I gonna be in it yeah you're gonna be serious to a lot apparently that's our probably few more characters probably get you on nr yeah yeah that was great it's fucking work felt like somebody's my granddad out into the fucking studio you're sitting oh baby what we're doing well Paul I haven't learnt the line to be fair I'd just been given the lines and you know he's you're blaming Biffle now on his podcast I'm blaming do you know what no you don't have any good time and that's been cheap show for another lovely week please enjoy the austerity our austerity now that's not a word Jesus we really have lost it man we really have we should have done a recording today bye everyone