Ep 116 Why Part of You Still Wants to Go Back to AA — Grieving AA 3: Bargaining

Bargaining is a normal stage of grief — but when you’ve left AA, it can keep you stuck.Maybe you’ve told yourself, “It wasn’t that bad,” “I can just take the good and leave the rest,” or “Maybe I was the problem.”In this episode, I break down how AA culture trains us to bargain with harm, avoid the full truth, and even spiritualize abuse. I share real examples from my 10 years in AA, how I recognized my own bargaining, and how you can start unpacking it.📌 Inside this video:What bargaining looks like after leaving AAHow “take the good, leave the rest” keeps the programming aliveSpiritual bypassing and blame-shiftingReal-life examples from my time in AAJournaling prompts to help you unpack it📝 Journaling Prompts:What part of you still wants to believe AA wasn’t that bad?What are you afraid might happen if you admit the harm?Have you told yourself you can “just take the good” even when you know the harm runs deeper?What would it mean to fully face the truth about AA for you?In what ways have you internalized the blame for what happened in AA?Have you avoided unpacking your experience because you feel you “should be over it”?What spiritual lessons (if any) are you using to justify your pain or your AA experience?What do you gain by holding on to parts of AA — and what might it be costing you?Timestamps:00:00 Doubting your decision to leave AA intro07:17 Journaling prompts🪩 Get fee tools, community, Zooms and book club to deprogram 12-step ideology 📚👉 Inside the Deprogram Lounge click here.💬 Let’s Connect @SobrietyBestieDM me or comment on any Sobriety Bestie socials. I’m here for the conversation.Let’s get f*cking free.