Ep 155 Harms of Perfectionism with Corey Williams

I have my friend and DEI consultant, Corey Williams back on the podcast today as we unravel the premise of Perfectionism. We explore grammar, language, and systems that have upheld people of power and keep oppression alive in our society. Calling out or judging people, colleagues, friends, strangers, or family for grammar 'errors' or 'improper sentence structure' or how they speak keeps us locked in a way of being that feels restrictive and hard. And when we feel that way, we tend to want to escape like, drink, eat, and avoid. And it prevents us from developing relationships, learning new ideas, and seeing a bigger, more colorful human existence. When we feel righteous or inclined to point out how other people are wrong.. it implies that we know more than the other person or that we are better than them. And there is no morality in someone who 'knows' and uses proper English or abides by a classic and typical way of being (which is also known as the mid-upper class, cis (straight) white way). We discuss ways to notice or how you can identify within yourself if you are doing this and how to shift it so you can experience a richer more interesting and compassionate way of life that will open your brain to learning more and up-leveling your life in ways you can't even understand right now. When I get emails or messages about improper grammar or spelling mistakes my heart sinks because I know that your attention to those details is distracting you from getting the message that could actually help you drink less and do more in your life. So, this is for you if you call yourself a grammar nazi (which we really need to drop that term, btw), if you pride yourself on never making a spelling mistake, or if you have said, 'If there is an improper use of their/they're, I'm out, you've lost me..' and so on.. please open your mind to hearing the message here, and I promise you, we probably made a lot of mistakes in this conversation and we are all into learning and growing from it. One more thing.. unless you are directly asked to edit someone's words or language, STOP DOING IT. Perfectionism keeps us all small. And it's rooted in what we think other people will think of us if we 'don't do it right' and worrying about what other people think.. does not help you move forward, it keeps you stuck. Being willing to be wrong, make mistakes, and put yourself out there will help you live an exciting and fulfilling life, one that you don't need to escape from with alcohol. You can follow Corey on the socials @saircollective or visit Coreywilliams.com.   I am now accepting applications for my 6-month coaching program, Stop Over-drinking and Start Living. Check out this page to learn more about my program, and get your application in.  https://www.angelamascenik.com/joinsodsl Let's do this together! Also, check out my new and improved website at angelamasccenik.com