Ep 21: The Body Knows First - Leesa Scanlan on Coercive Control, Intuition & Coming Home to Herself

Leesa is the kind of woman whose presence carries a story before she even names it.She is a storyteller, generator, creative, former ICN competitor, runner, and a woman whose voice has become part of her work in the world.In this episode, Tuan sits down with Leesa for a raw, honest, and deeply grounded conversation about a relationship that began like a fairytale full of attention, intensity, affection, and promises of a future before slowly becoming confusing, controlling, and difficult to name.They talk about love bombing, future faking, coercive control, the body knowing before the mind catches up, and the grief of wanting the story to be real even when the truth is already showing.But this is not a conversation that leaves Leesa inside the wound.It follows the woman who emerged from it.The woman who found language for what happened.The woman other women reached out to when they recognised their own experience in hers.The woman who realised her voice was not just part of her healing it was part of her purpose.Leesa also speaks about trust, intuition, people-pleasing, public voice, self-awareness, boundaries, and the next version of herself, the one who no longer negotiates with her intuition, her time, her energy, or her truth.Sometimes the glow up is not softer makeup, a better body, or a shinier life.Sometimes it is the moment a woman becomes impossible to distort.Timestamps:0:28 – Introducing Leesa and the story behind the conversation1:13 – When the glow up means refusing to be distorted1:42 – Who Leesa was before sharing her story publicly2:32 – Having the best parts of herself chipped away2:58 – Feeling burnt to the ground3:14 – The phoenix chapter and becoming the next version of herself4:05 – What felt promising at the beginning4:34 – The Prince Charming phase5:02 – Quietening her intuition5:30 – Love bombing and hearing everything she wanted to hear5:56 – Moving quickly and future faking6:41 – How control slowly mixes with the good times7:11 – The body knows before the mind does7:41 – When her mind started catching up with her body8:49 – When he started defining what was “normal”9:24 – The cycle of forgetting the bad and focusing on the good9:44 – What changed when women started reaching out10:02 – Being warned while still in the relationship10:52 – How other women helped her continue leaving11:13 – Realising this was a behavioural pattern11:59 – The validation and grief of hearing from other women12:15 – “I definitely wasn’t special”13:23 – Mental health, domestic violence, and distorted reality13:39 – Wanting to protect the story she still wanted to believe14:36 – “I wanted what we had to be real”14:46 – Abandoning herself and still having compassion for that version15:47 – The power of having language for the experience16:18 – The cost of not abandoning yourself16:37 – Hope dies last16:50 – Surrendering to the truth17:09 – Not being grateful for what happened, but loving who she is today17:37 – Coming home to herself17:53 – Spirituality, purpose, and being part of change18:56 – Using her voice after twenty years in mental health advocacy19:41 – Not everyone can or should share publicly20:33 – How sharing your story can give others permission to speak21:52 – Authenticity beyond online wellness language22:41 – Why Leesa refuses to be told to niche24:16 – What the next version of Leesa no longer negotiates with25:37 – Learning to protect her time and energy26:35 – How her relationship with trust has changed27:05 – Why you don’t need to be fully healed to enter a relationship27:18 – Trust is given first, but difficult to repair once broken27:42 – Why consistency matters28:14 – There is no relationship without trust29:34 – Self-awareness and communication in future relationships30:23 – Where to find LeesaTo watch the show click HERETo connect with Leesa click HERETo connect with Tuan Luu click HEREProduced by GlowOps Media