I made a terrible era by the way, the other day. Terrible era. No, nothing more related. So we've up until we've only had very warm weather, right?
So there's been a house in the street behind us. There's been a house in the street behind us. There's been a lot of houses. There's been people in the house in the street behind us who have been playing their music, apocalyptically loud.
Really bad, like bass, you can feel the bass coming through. Like for instance, I was walking down the street and I thought there was an event going on in the park. That's nowhere near where the house was playing the music. When I got home, I could see what was that place.
So that's been going on and on. What kind of music? The shit is worst. You know, like, you take an 80s and 80s and make it trance.
Yes. There's trance, smell, dance. Generic dance. I think they were playing all these horrible kind of 80s remixes with a kind of acid house.
Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh. The power of love. I love that one. I am a lady.
I am a lady. You want my man? Yes. That kind of thing.
Apparently, I wasn't there, but my girlfriend said the woman next door came out at one point during the week and went, I can't fucking think. I can't think. And they had a big blowout. Anyway, there's people in there.
Just don't know what your flat shearers are all people who live together. And the music's blaring loud in the kitchen. I can't take it anymore. There's a lot of the music.
Right. It stops. And I shout, you fucking can't turn your fucking shit music off. It was quiet.
And then I hit the speakers kick off again. And it was happy birthday to you. But it turned out that was a kid's party going on a big cop. I just called them all guns.
That's only good enough for like half of the pilot of a sitcom. Sorry dude. It's a week opening. Like it's a very podcast.
Certainly is. Yeah, it was about, I don't know. And you didn't have anything like it at all. I just haven't had access to it.
I haven't had access to it at all. I don't know. You didn't have anything like that. I just don't have access to it.
I just have something lined up. I don't know. Listen, I'm gonna do an impression of you now. Go on.
I said you can't fucking cut that. So there was a kid. My sel you know the phrase fuck my life from we both. We've never really ever said that.
Because we're using it as shorthand to sort of sum up a despairing attitude. Well, he's welcome to the truth show. I mean, I still haven't. Oh, that's what I was gonna say.
Everyone's okay. Cause I have a lady. You know what would have been like maybe as for me as a kid's birthday. If somehow they sampled you in that moment when you said turn that fucking shit off.
And then they went. Turn that shit. Shit. Shit.
Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit.
Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit.
Yeah. This is the part of the podcast where I wish I'd cut to the theme to you earlier. I'm going to go to the party. People love noodles.
Factory show you can have a learn to fucking accept. Chee show. Pop, rap, rap, rap, rap. Chee show.
It's the price of shit. Be like silver. And a girl with a nuzzle. Hello, welcome to Chee Show.
The economy comedy podcast where I pull Ganon and Eli Silverman go for the charity shops. Bar-Gabins. A power land's a great Britain. And see what treasures we can find amongst the trash and what a plaque show we've got today.
It certainly is apart from one element, but we're on that later. Can't help. Can't help. You'll be awful right in the murder mystery.
Who killed Dr. Spliffs? And it's like Dr. Spliffs.
I want more info on Dr. Spliffs before we continue. All he's dead now. Does he wear like a lab coat?
No, he's one of those doctors that wears a lot of tweed. Ah, he has one of those leather bags. Does he have a smoking case? And he talks like this.
Yes, hello everybody. I am Dr. This is my scariote test. Dr.
Dr. Yes, sir. There's a phone call from you. It's your wife.
She says she's leaving. My thing goes from you. She says you're Dr. Spliffs and you're terrible.
I'm going to get to the pantry and give some jam. Well, not even a minute in and we've gone off the radio. Pantry jam. Pantry jam and Dr.
Spliffs. That's what we've done so far. Oh, sorry. What we've got coming up today?
Well, we've got eight. The whole episode has and will be and is going to be dedicated to the price of shot. Right. The shot at Paul.
We're going to prize the prize. Right. Our website prize is right. I was listening to some old episodes recently and you would sometimes go hours, episodes without saying anything random and nonsense based.
I'll try the rest of this episode. Is everyone want that? I want that. Just one episode.
Can you calm down? You used to be intelligent. You used to rip off comedy scenes. We used to have a little like a comedy scene.
We had pantry jam as soon as you could. So don't go. I just thought, where is this person? The person probably go back to the pantry because they're a servant who related a phone call to Dr.
Spliffs. Yeah, but you were too busy going about pantry jam. Dr. Spliffs to come to life.
He was a received panacea. Yes, sir. And he talks in a strange way. It's strange way.
Basically, we listened to some stereo split. Test those singles. What they even called them? It's this Paul.
It was on the do-try grammar. Past the do-try grammar phone label. Past the do-try grammar on the left hand side. No, Dr.
Spliffs would be. Yeah, wouldn't he? Past the duchir on the left hand side. See?
See? Test record for setting up stereo equipment. It's a stereo equipment. Seven-inch single.
Yeah, because we forget that back in the day. stereo was an exciting thing for people who had never witnessed anything with the area outside of the mono broadcast on their radio. It was equivalent. Is it sort of, would you say, going from black and white to color?
I guess in terms of sound. You know, you have sound split. It would have been magical. Yes.
It would have been there because it could move around. It's the stereo equipment. It would be only in a binary way. Yeah.
Around your head. The stereo equipment of when the train comes towards a platform that old black and white movie is based on that. Well, that's why I'm making that comparison with film. Yeah.
So it's like that. It's a fight. Oh, yeah. It's like top series.
Take this seriously with your panning and your bass and your treble and make sure it's coming out of there. For safety sake. Make sure. For safety sake.
What safety sake. Just to make sure you got it right. The safety of you got it right. Oh, he's saying to me sure.
We're going to repeat the test for safety sake. For safety sake. He doesn't say stereo. Yeah.
Sorry. Sorry, I'm funny. I'm going to be doing an extra test. What you're saying?
How is this? Better English than. Make quick rhyme. This is to help the guitar pans to the left and me, Josh, my novice.
In the left channel, you'll hear the slip slap flapping of my flaccid penis against my palm. And on the right channel, you'll hear the ejaculate. I'm switching up on my assistant's face. Thanks.
I just wanted to do that. I was thinking we could find it. This is kind of very polite. Are we going to play some of that record for them just to, yeah, you know what?
If you send me, I'll put it in. Now. If in your apparatus, the loudspeakers are in two separate enclosures. Place them as close to each other as possible for the following test.
If the loudspeakers are housed in the same enclosure, if for instance, you'll possess a stereo radiogram, then you are equally well in a position to carry out this test. You'll now hear a sound three times. If the loudspeaker units are correctly polarized, it will commence between the loudspeakers and finish up in the room. You'll now hear the same noise in the opposite direction from that which I have mentioned.
If the loudspeakers are correctly polarized, it will commence in the room and finish between the loudspeakers. It's absolutely delightful. Now, we are though. They've got serious business today.
We're going to be playing a price of a shite. So episode long price of a shite. Because it is an absolute stonking packed show. And does that mean there's a more of an opportunity for me and yourself to score high between each?
There are between the plenty I believe. I wouldn't say infinite because we don't have an amount of things to go through. We get the all-purpose source. Can I get the J-infinite betweens with the all-purpose source board?
No, I don't think source works in a time-related space. What if the source has all-purposes within it? Mate? Yeah.
Remember we said earlier in the show, I'm talking serious. I'm having nice things. So, Tom, who's been in the show, people may know him online is a weekend lolly gaggad. Oh!
It was the guy who sent us the Derek tapes, right? Oh, baby, and those are pure goals. It has a right now. Derek Trilogy.
Yes, well, there might be one on my own. Sorry, let me bring people to date with the Derek situation before we get into the price. Sorry. Yeah.
Because a lot of people really worry about what's going to happen with the Derek situation. Seriously, people have, though. Say, when's it coming back? What's a new fucking sarcastic?
I'm saying a lot of people give a shit about what's going on with the Derek fucking situation. The Derek situation is thus. So, at the moment, Tom is looking for the fourth story, the UFO one, which doesn't have an ending, but he knows how it ends. So we can all have a guess of how it maybe turns out.
However, right, what he's also done is sent me a big bag of cassettes, and the cassettes is Derek's life story. Apparently, he recorded his life story onto his cassettes. No, no. Oh, no.
C90s. Yeah. And now, I spoke to Tom and I said, in all due respect, I'm not going to digitize what could be seven to eight hours worth of content and then go through it. He said something stops quite poor.
So I'm going to take it back to him. He digitized himself. I'm going to let him upload it to his own website. So if people want to know more, they can go there.
But we are going to serve for the fourth story. And there are little clips we can use from this. We're going to have as we're going to get a selection of the audible in a few weeks of time. I'm going to suggest that anyway.
But that sounds like there's probably some flipping gold in the life story. There's one or two chons that I'm going to play in a few episodes times. It kind of tastes like the Derek to come. That's what's happening there.
Tom, I also sent a huge big box and in it was way too many cool things. And it's all a price of strikes. So today's episode is going to be Tom's box. And it gives me a chance as well to talk about things that I've wanted to talk about on cheap show for a while and never really had the excuse.
And there's one thing coming up that I'm really excited that Tom found and sent my way because it's amazing. So at the end of the episode, we will do the scores and it will be a mighty between. There's a whole hall of between coming my way. I believe we've got six items in general.
Are you saying it'd be impossible for me to just like, strike out? They strike out. I don't know what you're talking about at all in general. It's impossible for me to score no betweens.
I mean, in truth, why not? It's possible all the time to score no betweens. There's no option of infinite betweens. There's no, let me be clear.
Let me be clear. You could win nothing. You can't win everything. Yes.
Thank you. Just making that clear because everything is infinite. Well, no, there could be infinite betweens as one of the prizes to them. One of these items.
Here's what he's got, right? So he's printed out two price of strikes sheets. Scorecards. Do I get one of those?
It's just good, isn't it? And there are six items. I like it. Now here's where things get complicated because it says exact price, obviously two betweens.
I like it. I like it. If you nominate an item as the exact price, that's just like, oh, that's definitely 50p. I'm going to get it right.
Then it bubbles the between. Oh, yeah. But you can only nominate one item from the whole range. Gambling one item.
If you want to double that, if you feel real good about it, if you want item on the nose. Yeah. Now that's all I have. So guess actual betweens.
Oh, but don't know. Have you read this, Paul? If you get it wrong when you gamble, you score zero, even if you were within the 25p range. I'm so okay.
That's the gamble. If you roll the dice and lose. It's not worth it. Yeah.
It's not worth it. Yeah. We don't have to use the gamble, do we? If I was more confident in my abilities, maybe I'd take a risk, but come on, mate, finish it.
Show the last few. It's got an unusual spelling of between here with an R. Did you see that per twin? Mate, we're going to have to try.
Well, there's no official. There is one of the episodes. P.G. is it?
It's P. Dash. Twing. So there's no vowel between the P and the T.
No, between between. Yeah, you're right. So it's between. That is the official getting a between.
But no weirdly. Get my betweener out because I'm getting a between. Mate. No.
No. It shoots jample. It does shoot jammy lie. It does.
It's probably this week. Look, okay. Not just vowel sandwich. Now, vowel sandwich.
Patrango. So I just wanted to say that. Fine. We don't have to gamble.
That's where I was. I like these rules, man. It's very beautiful. It's not very clear, though, on whether you have to gamble one of your items.
No, you don't have to. You're saying now you won't? I'm not going to. I don't have any confidence.
No, I mean, especially with their second hand items, it's the most impossible. With a sort of new item, you might have been to the shop and see what I mean. But with a second hand item, it's going to be different. And look, the price is less than just the prices versus end prices.
And you know what part of the country that these all came from or different places or he's got the paper in his hand. Because, strangely, it's the paper that has none of the information that I needed. Eli, I'm just going to confess it now. We can't hang a lantern on this.
Paul forgot the letter with the information on how much it was. It's all the way back in Harrow. And they also forgot the... Who in the house are having eggs?
The twins. So they will be there. I don't know right now. What the scores are.
I feel like I broke the ejaculations in the day record. What on his last one? No. I'm not going to accept that as anything humorous and analogy from what we're going through right now.
I'm blocking that. I'm putting a stake in the heart of that conversation. I'm just going to ask you, mate. You're the one who fucked up, Roy Lee.
This is like when I didn't bring the sheets. The plan is now. We're recording as of this recording Sunday. We've got a bit of business to do with Norwich going in.
Bit business year. And then after that, we're going to come back and record the between part of the show. Just got to sort of put a piece of stuff over the list. Listen, Norwich.
Yeah, that's where it is. How are we getting there? Magic carpet ride. So, shut up.
I didn't... We're going all the way to Norwich. Yeah, Reynolds and Forest. Fuck me.
I haven't even got any clean undies. This segment's gone on for far too long. So, for the list of them... I'm ready to play.
Listen, I'm excited. They will get the whole experience. Also, we'll have to belay the betweens until I later record the session. Belay?
That's the right word, isn't it? Belay? No. There's no belay.
Belay and delay are two words. Belay. Ask me the internet. It's not a word, mate.
Belay. Just accept it. It doesn't say nothing. Literally, you Google, you Google WAT.
Belaying is a variety of techniques, climbers use to create friction within a climbing system. Particularly on a climbing road. So, that falling climber does not fall very far. Belaying.
It's not that else, we've all learnt what the word, belaying means. We are going to have to delay our gratification. Delay the belay on the betweens, what you're trying to say. But the list will get it all in one big held broadcast package.
Look, I thought of another slightly different meaning for the word per-twink. Right. So, you say, how many betweens per-twink? How many betweens?
Well, that means we have to call the items twings. I'm John Per-twink. Mate. Focus.
Just keep it together. Jam and fudge. How the fuck, mate? Right, let's just get this going.
I'm playing as a gentleman. I'll begin. The epic. Price.
Oh, this item. I'm rock sharp, ready for this. Do you want to do the song? Is it a very pass?
Do you want to do the right song? Do you want to do the right song properly? The price of Sha'it song. Do you want to do that properly?
Now, do it. It's the fucking price of Sha'it. It's the fucking price of Sha'it. It's the fucking price of Sha'it.
It's the fucking price of Sha'it. It's the fucking price of Sha'it. And that is right. Thank you.
And let's start with what I think are the meekers of the items on the list today. Meek items. The meekers of the items. The one that will neither nally or nearly us.
Okay. You've started now. Don't you start. Is it like some virus?
I'll just nonsense virus and billidying dongss. So what are we starting with? The meekers? Oh, you're going to get it out for me now.
Okay. Start with these. These are called two sound buttons. And what are they Eli?
These are two buttons. A big button. About three and a half inches across each in hard plastic packaging. Are you all right?
And they're like buttons. You press them. One is red and it says the word no on it Paul. And the other is green and it says the word yes.
These are novelty items. I guess they're for like playing games or. We're going to open them up now. But it's that terrible kind of packaging that is extremely annoying.
I'll deal with it. Yeah, there you go. They've got a little battery pack at the back. You have to provide your own battery.
Yeah, I guess so. We don't have any batteries. Do I? I'm going to have a look in the magic bag.
I would expect that when you press it, it's the yes button. It says yes, Paul. That'd be my guess. Paul's little magic bag for love dreams and things.
Is it full of dreams? Paul's little magic bag for love dreams and things. And here's a little bit of batteries. Oh, no, they're double A.
We need a little one. We need a little one. I've got a control. Paul's magic bag.
I don't think that's those are big ones as well. These are right. I was going to borrow them for this. Okay.
Thank you for supporting the batteries from the remote control and not from Paul's magic bag. A full of dreams and things. Clumpy wishy washy hair smelling very fishy. Let's see if this worked.
I put batteries in. Is there a switch? No. Here we go.
Another disappointment on the way to not getting any put wings. Exactly. He's how I see this whole bit Paul. No, it doesn't work.
No switch. Try it in that one. Okay. Try it in that one.
Okay. Maybe it's just this buttons. Okay. I'm putting these batteries in and clicking in there.
There you go. Mine works. What did I say? Yes.
This is different. Yeah. I did. Yes.
Oh, yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.
Yes. That's a robot voice. Yes. Yes.
Yes. Oh, yes, that's like that one. Yes. Yes.
Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.
Oh, yes. Oh, yes. How long is this going to come off? Yes.
Yes. No, we're back around. Yes. Yes.
That's like a mariotti. He does, doesn't it? Or like, he's a junk. Maybe I put these in this one wrong.
I want to know what I want to know. They're no working. Well, just check the way round. I've got mine.
I did. I put them in the right way. Let's have a look again. It just doesn't work.
The no button doesn't work too negative. Bad vibes, you know. Oh, make the no button doesn't work. Oh, well.
Oh. Terrible, well killing, landfill feeling crap. So that is our first item in that segment. So Eli, what do you use?
The amount of like, I can use your sources that went into making that. Are you something? Are you a lot of fun that you'd actually have with it? Do you know what I mean?
That's the thing, the reason this exists is like some type of the office. No, you've got room. No, working in the party. Some cons.
It works in an office. And he's got his own little room. And he's got a desk with a Newton's cradle on and a picture of Garfield saying, I hate Mondays. And he's got a button like that.
And someone comes and goes, hey, Frank, have you got the papers? Have you got the numbers yet for next week's quarterly meeting? And he goes, eh, he goes, yes. Yes.
He goes, yes. He's like, no, Frank, can you just talk like an adult? Do you have them? It's like, it's like, it's a rigid vase, the opposite kind of thing, isn't it?
Just horrible. Just terrible. We both hate them. Maybe you could use it at a push if you're doing a game show.
You could, but then, but, you know, it's hard. You do want your own in your house, in your bedroom, by yourself, at midnight, lonely crying, pannas, round your ankles, slamming the yes button down, pedantic, all that. Well, a kid could enjoy it, but you wouldn't want to give it to a kid, because then you'd hear it all day long, wouldn't you? And on the bus and stuff.
Right. On the bus, they have a day pool. Yeah. There was a child who had this Spiderman rattle, like a wheel, drum that was like a wheel on the long sort of cane, a stick.
Yes. So every time you're a bit along, like a rattle, which works like a wheel along the ground. Yeah. Just shaking it, snacking it on the thing.
Just like his mum is on the phone. It was just like, I just, I don't know. What a great anecdote. Right.
Let's crack on. Apparently they have 10 sayings on. That sounds about right. Yeah.
So yeah, novelty stupid thing for a boss to have, who you despise called Frank. Do you think one of the no ones was like, er, no, maybe? Well, we'll never know. I could try and get inside and fix it, because it's a loose connection.
But why? Right. How much do you think it is for the two pools? Do you want me to go first or do you want to go first?
First first. Right. I'm going to say, because they're both together, I'm going to say they sold for £1.50. So I'm going to write £1.50 online.
And this is the buttons, right? Yes. What are you saying? And we don't know what part of the world this is from.
I think Alpens, I think it was new in the works. It was new in the works. It's not something. Well, second now, you've got any charity shops.
These all charity shops, by the way. OK. I've got no charity shops, I just forgot. I mean, when we do the segment later, I'll find the letter and correct it.
I'll say it with. Stay tuned for the episode for the peterwigs. And the important background information to set this whole quiz up. We don't know what I pull.
Stay at test. We do like a stare at test. Is that Dr. Splitus again?
Right, next one is this item number two. Eli, say what you're seeing. Oh, it's a little puzzle that could have you. It says on it the puzzle that could have you.
And then the puzzle's name written in billion balls snooked. And they're not snookables, they're not. They're all billion. They're billion balls.
No, snookers are particular type of billiards. No, it's a billion table. They're just what are they called? Billion balls.
The brand of those are billion balls. That's what they're called. Billy ball. Whether you use them in pool or snooker or ability to billiard ball.
I think you can interchange them. Anyway, this is some kind of puzzle. I want the limber. Oh, I didn't expect it to be that.
I thought it was going to be like cards or something. But the whole box is sort of a top down view on a snooker table. Yes, the six pockets. I'm just trying not to damage it too much with taking the tape off.
It's very old game, isn't it? And then inside you have another representation of a snooker table. This is a Wellington's game. Not Wellington's, which I thought it said, but Wellington's.
It's like a dice game, essentially, it looks to me because they're all cubes. Oh, my god. How to play Snooker? Eight cubes.
They're eight cubes. And they have different numbers and combinations of balls. It's green, I should say. Balls on each side of each piece.
It's not tapping the table balls. You think it's got a flat surface right in front of you, which is. And this makes noise. And you sound like an incompetent con.
I'm getting sweaty and unhappy. So yeah, he's got eight plastic cubes. And on the sides of each are arrangements of different colored billiard balls. Snooker balls.
I said that. I know I'm saying it with clarity. Here we go. How to play Snooker.
Place the cubes together in two rows of four to make a snooker table. Place them in a case. Place the cubes together in two rows of two. Do what they say.
So please be clear. So two rows of four. And that arranges it into the snooker table shape, right? Then arrange them to show three sets of snooker balls, one on the top, one on the bottom, and one on the fourth side of the table.
A set of snooker balls comprises 15 reds and one of these white, black, pink, blue, brown, green, and yellow. I don't understand. They're arranged. So you have to arrange them to show three sets of snooker balls.
What does it mean though? Three sets? How are you showing three sets? So one, three sets.
All of them. Yeah. Another. Uh, three sets.
All of them. No, arrange them to show three sets of snooker balls. Where? Where are the three sets being shown?
You know what I mean? It's like, wouldn't it be four sets? No, it's just each face. Because then you've got two left over.
Let me see that. God. I don't like this game. Place the cubes.
They're pretty. Two rows of four. Go on, do it. You do it.
I'm doing it. To make a snooker table. I do it. You do it.
Right. Done it. Then, the now they just round them. Three sets of snooker balls, one on the top, one on the bottom, and one on the fourth side.
Oh, I say so. Okay. So on the top. Do you see now?
You've got to have the snook table arrangement, the number of the white number of balls. On the bottom of those that arrangement, you've got to have it. It's around the sides. It's a cuboid.
What is it? It's like a plank shape, basically. And they mean each face of the plank shape. So one surface has to show a complete set.
The bottom surface was then the edge, basically. Is that right? The edge is that's where I was reset. So it's a, yeah.
So it's a, yeah. I don't like this. A set of snooker balls comprises double, double, double. Solution included, it says.