He like yes, well dream about you last night. Oh, yeah, it seems like we're gonna do this episode in this studio one of us has an erotic dream about I wasn't directly involved, but I think an iphone hang a lantern on it Bear with me mr. Silverman. Okay, so for some reason last night I had a dream that we were meant to be doing something for cheap show, right?
But you weren't available when I asked your agents who was I don't remember what she sounded like but she did look like the little woman from Beattleju Su ran the dead. Oh, you know that little old lady who's in the afterlife in the lobby. Yeah, you have to like she's smoking in the smoke Come out of the throat. Oh, yes, I know she looked like there anyway Oh, he lies in the jungle and I was like what's he doing in the jungle?
He's always making a film so then I go out to the jungle, right? And I'm sleeping I'm sleeping in it in a sleeping bag in the middle of the scene me yet Not yet like crocodiles are like sleeping next to me in this dream and the ones biting the other I'm trying to sleep anyway, I make it for this clearing. There's a hut right just a hot If you can't live outside is gonna be problematic And I go in and I swear to God you're standing there absolutely naked leg up on a chair like this banking Just a spanking and I'm gonna make like Nate and you're like I'm getting ready for my big shot And then I woke up and I had the biggest job on Oh my god, that was my dream. Sorry.
Good telegram from Mr. Freud. Yes. Hey, you're running us this week.
It's all special guests Mr. Paul. Hello hello. Hello.
I'm sorry that you had to hear that. No, sorry. Do you have dreams? But maybe it's dreams you get as you become older man where you're I'm always looking for a public toilet And I'm always kind of in my pants and I've got socks and these toilets always is horrible Victorian You know dripping sounds Floor my socks and we're not going in and it's Yeah, and I think I can't and it's basically you're glad going no wake up.
Yeah, we have to take a piss Yeah, often we have to don't we yeah, or we've missed the boat We have a little bit of a bedroom accident to deal with well I never had one of those trees, but it is it's classic anxiety dream territory, isn't it? I have that dream in real life It's a waking nightmare for me wait. You have the dream of real life all the incident Whenever I go out pool in London. Yeah, and like where's the toilet?
Oh and there's always like oh I'll show you the pump or show by something or just go can I use the loo and they what they're funny about it? You know, but then you just go round the bins by the back of the shop Well, I mean that was the whole thing we've locked down you suddenly realized as a man in your mid-fifties How far can I walk without not having to go into a pub or or sayings we used to go to the toilet? They're all shut Public sitting went through the roof To the ceiling do we talk about public restrooms or just like in the street? Oh in the park really?
Yeah, because of poor saying but no one's meant to be out to wipe you out For a fucking walk You know I go for a shit you should please bring about where you're men a shit if all the shops are shut and the Pudger shot everything shut and walking down the road perhaps. I've had some blue tackies I've had a bag of blue tackies. I've done the powder. No need to shit turquoise We're gonna get to the credits then now when you're gonna tell everyone the big announcement about the podcast Go on everyone we are going we're changing we're now gonna be purely squid game We're not we just talk about squid game all day long squid pasta squid pasta squid pot I don't want to talk about squid is that you we had a little chat before the episode you got a great idea for the Open was that it that was it?
Yeah, it was quite funny. You loved yeah It caught me off guard. Well, this is that kind of dates upon casting about a year's time No one's talking about squid game instead of talking about clam match Well good to cheap show I hate you and your fucking noodle Pussy people love noodles Yes, it's economy podcast right Paul Gannon you like silver go for the charity of arguments power lands and beyond to bring you the treasure amongst the trash Hello, you like yeah, hi, I'm gonna be what I'm gonna do what here enthusiastic I know why you let the guest talk to guys fucking picking on me. There's a hierarchy of introductions in the podcast They introduced me everyone knows who I am The main star first introduces the show me then the underling Then you and then I lost your guest mr.
Paul putter hello mr. Putter hello hello I was asking how he's gonna name us because of both Paul's partner. Yeah, I'm going to get in Rock on partner and Gannon Just have a ring doesn't it I've always thought Gannon works well for depending on the surname I will often wonder if they do it when they break up a cannon board has a ring to as opposed to ball and cannon Well, it's just like walking wise little in large Yeah, so you got the close syllables at the beginning Mitchell and web I think I broke the code that how you have to be a good stubble at you just have to have the right about syllables They're in decline. It's all the same.
But you see Lee and herring will originally gonna be herring and Lee it sounds better But still wondered it is Lee and herring Because I can never remember the name of herring and Lee and never remember that a Lee and herring sorry You see I got wrong then no something little me this right other half She's French and she always says can you pass me a fork and knife, please? And I say no it over in this country We say knife and fork and she says well doesn't make sense because she put it on the table forks on the left. Oh, yeah Oh, yes, but I'll deny my right hand always have No, it's not for me unless you're being right. I was being rude and you miss heard what she calls a Pass me the plate and I go that's a bowl.
No, it's a plate as well. It's a dish But it's definitely a bowl no, it's a plate and God again It was this banging our heads together over this and also she told me that mama is pronounced magnet What is that's what a mama is? Yeah, that's right. So she's right.
I think they're otherwise used to go around saying I was bawl a bawl was the name of a pot But I was not is it so I thought for always from bovine for beef. It was a cow meat drink wasn't it called a bawl? Yeah, but I was bawl of it's from bovine. Yeah, it's cow.
I'm just disagreeing with that fact Can you say Eli said something right Eli said something right that I didn't contest I don't know why you're going on about the real from bawl of real then the Welsh town Yeah So thank you for coming on the show Paul yeah I wanted you on the show for a while not only because I'm a big fan of those kind of things that I present to say to a guest But also it's like when you go on your Twitter account you pull out things from your attic or things you buy the charity show I'm just sitting there going your attic is our podcast. Yeah, I mean it's like you bring out all these board games and weird toys you've obviously had for a while and yeah I'm a bit like one of those hoarders I suppose and my parents have allowed me to hoard as well Oh, yeah, and so I just never threw anything away. I never looked after anything I think that's the problem. So I've got all these things, but they're all kind of either knackered or broken or scratched and bit missing It's missing so it's not like they were facing a couple of things might be but yet I just thought I was going through the attic of my parents every time I go back to see my folks I have to go in the loft and look around and I go you're gonna come through the ceiling Yeah, I did once as well.
So you was ultimately proven right. Yeah, so there you go And I always have a nose round in the loft and yeah And I just thought we'll be quite fun to take pictures of these things and stick them on Twitter See if people like it. Yeah, I I do I do enjoy looking at it because I went to my storage They form a board games and just try to sort them out and I counted them out 150 Very nice three round my gap which we refuse. I know I got four in my make Joe's place I said I pick up a year ago as well and I haven't done that as well And he's got quite a lot of big ones like the gladiators ITV board game Well, right, yeah, which is pretty good.
I know the East Enders board game as well Which I'm really looking forward to playing one day. That's that's one of those charity shop mainstays It was for a while like the neighbors board game That's always pops up I grabbed that as well because you may as well and I like the idea behind that where you have to build a script for an episode As you go around the board. Yeah, it's not about actually being because that'd be boring in there in there in there in there in there Yeah, I get a lot what you big a lot. What does that mean?
You're a fucking idiot I'll just put a million from our please. We've got the play this game As you can see I'm in my heart waiting not playing games. I'm just wanking right off into your face No, you weren't I can I just take it in my dream? It wasn't face to nuts I was a bit of distance between what your activity and my shot reaction a distance that I was quickly shortening with my big old god I will say this in the dream you were well endowed you had to move your elbow more So anyway, Paul so we first met on the set of Sean the dead we did that's got to be coming up to nearly 20 years ago That that's is sobering and terrifying at the same time because the last 20 years of my life I've just been seemingly like that.
I look back on that time. It doesn't feel that long ago It doesn't feel that long ago, but then you go. Oh, he's on the whole corner to trilogy Scott Pilgrim He's made all these films since then he's on the cover of Empire. Yeah, you know, he's got one coming doesn't he last night in Soho Hmm.
What what's wrong with that? It looks derivative. It's like a crap of what I'm sorry Oh, what's wrong with it? Fucking bubble what I just wanted to do it is it's off shallow shallow films You like those ghost monsters fans in 2016 I'm not saying that you are you say you haven't seen it you don't know what it's about you're going off nothing Didn't like baby driver.
Well, well, what's going on about that? Well, it's not the Edgar Wright criticism podcast. So you heard zombie as well. I was yeah I actually got cut to be fair really completely well No, I didn't I was a before I turned into a zombie I was a cab driver and I had seen where Sean Simon pig gets in the back of the taxi and I say something like I had one of those One of those in a in a back in my cab the other day couldn't understand a word.
I was saying, you know, so it's obviously it was a The undead that's in the back rather than a stinking foreigner My cab driver's probably supposed to be a bit of one of those and yeah, but it go actually rang me up and said look mate I'm really sorry, but you're in good company I've just had to cut Pete Bainam scene as well today. Sorry, but you are in it you do get to rip off Dylan around's head. Okay. Yeah, well, that's very nice of him as a director to let you know it was nice because yeah It was I was gutted but you know, I'm still in it There was a lot of things about that movie because when it was getting made like for it's a script was being banded around I got my copy of the script halfway through production So I knew what was coming and there were a lot of really interesting scenes cut out just for time and budget Yeah, and the one that I always go on about was like when people say oh Paul Where were you in Sean the dead?
I go well a bit of a curse thing because even though I'm on the background ones, you know Just the general masses there was one guy who was the Peter deliveries on me, you know, you see with a big red cycle helmet Yeah, and that guy pout is making trouble or you couldn't come back to the set so all of a sudden that guy was not available So they just literally I was in the room at the right time I think I'd write brother Oscar turned turned to me or someone in that what's his brother doing nepotism Well, no, his brother was doing the storyboarding for the thing because he's a really good I don't know There was a scene where later on the pizza deliveries on you breaks into the pool with everyone else and they get the Winchester out And I meant to go into the cycle helmet and then blow my whole head over So I was looking forward to getting a head cast in the thing and then it just didn't happen They had to go to because there's too much going on in that pub scene at the end cut stuff even if it's good stuff That's the thing that's the point. Yeah, it's horrible when it happens. I was in Rogue one is it what's the good one? Yeah, I know tell me about it the one about the deficit every time comes on the telly Everyone starts talking about it on Twitter and I'm rubbing it in I've never seen it But I did a bit of two weeks that to keep going to pi wouldn't wow and to do this news credit They did call me and they go make you've been cut Wow.
Will you speak it? There's your book? Yeah? Nice nice scene quite funny.
Oh, well, it's a wasn't filmed at all. No, it was film at all No, it was film. Oh, I'm saying it's okay. So was it on delete it seems or did they know it's not even on the blue rung I don't wait 20 years for whatever format it's gonna be Before they bring out the 30th edition.
Yeah, you know the first edition of Rogue one because what happened was the director who was making it It was the crime ember's name. He did monsters in the Godzilla and Godzilla. Yeah, he was a guy's name Gareth Yeah, yes. Yes.
Yes. Yeah, I know he had all what he shot Disney didn't like or a lot of it They didn't like not all of it and so they brought in someone else and they reshot over the summer very quickly Yeah, right so it seems like with the ones you were just lost in that wash then I guess absolutely I had another friend who was in it Tony way was in it okay, he's stuff got cut There was a lot though with Star Wars I didn't have solo get halfway filmed and then they completely Spicked it in there One of the special effects guys and he said the money they spend on these scenes and sequences and films and set pieces and they Just show it to a test screen and just go no. Yeah, that's what blows my mind They're huge tent pole things so they yeah I've also forgot as well. I've got this to give you a little special I said it was a little pamphlet that came with it suggestions of how to I've got some pictures of this, but I just want to give you a look at what's crap for throw Thank you crap for it also did manage to put it around that cables.
That's quite impressive. Oh, but I need I can't read this isn't Japanese Yes, but you have I don't know translate app you could translate it. That sounds like something I need to work at Yeah, it does something you have to put a bit of fucking it's not terrible Isn't that terrible terrible right on the show today. We are going to be doing a platters and we're going to a gun and gold games We've got a kind of theme theme threaded through this episode this week So is it wet is there weft there is a weft of a theme stitched like a cross stitch like there's a cross stitch a gold trim in the West Weft through my cross stitch nice.
I don't know what now that I said it so often I don't actually there's that much of a Weft theme there is no weft. I think there's a there's a there's a there's a whiff of a theme running through this episode I will get to it in the fullness of time. Do you have anything else to bring up? Do you have a tells on this trip dance floor?
No, everyone's really well behaved. I got one if you want to get it Yeah, I got that guy use that one last time. Oh, yeah, yeah Tell some dance floor by Dylan Dylan who's emailed last time and he had that guy who came up to and wanted to to Oh, yeah. Oh, wow.
So hello. That was a bit so you're hitting my own stories featured But I'm glad to enjoy them and since writing the first couple stories I have another one because he has a DJ gig in his local parties now I believe so, yes So I decided the theme of the night would be some cool mellow soul stuff So I crafted my playlist and filled it with the usual suspects Marvin Gates, Sam and Dave Curtis mayfield plus many more that just sprung to mind As I played about 40 minutes into the set I had a guy come up to my booth and ask can you play any 90s? Which is just nice and vague. Yeah, um, I typical down-floor request I don't mind the request too much since I was kind of looking for where to go next But my set time is about four hours and four hours at the same kind of music can be a bit dull So I was happy to take some direction.
Okay, so he's not instantly like you with the just fuck off out of my soul I just when people say a decade as a genre of music that is not a genre of music and you know what magic Mike That's the name of a fucking film. That's not soon. No, that's the name of a film You can't come up to me go pay magic Mike and expect me to know what the fuck you are about maybe what you to get undressed All of them to the heart I had you down to music Patreon to you my hand a heart she spoke to this student the other day and she said well, what sort of music do you like and she went radio music? I Pull you okay Yeah, a bit of an issue he did a spit-zone there No, I don't know what that was kind of like an implosive spit-take where I saw my marriage But catch it before it's back to the bottle and who would more drink it in my mouth with the socks?
Yeah, I was kind of like a slightly drowning for a minute Yeah, if they they'd request 80s I mean 90s it's slightly better than 80s I guess 80s must be one of the most productive decades in human history in terms of producing recorded music Well, and certainly what variety of styles and genres just think how much music was committed to taping the 80s I'm sure a lot more more than in previous decades But less than now possibly well no definitely because you got sound clouds and all those kind of people where you have rappers dropping sound cloud wraps TikToks, yeah, and they're all doing it and that's a's an either I used to get annoyed when you had these 80s revival clubs like school disco types or I don't know You go but it was all it was never early 80s right? No, it was all the 80s stuff. I couldn't stand so I stopped taking a waterman Yeah, yeah, but got it got crap didn't it the 80s because there was like the electro pop stuff early in the 80s already like but people I think sort of lump that into the 70s Yeah, it's true the whole time of music becomes reasonably nebulous because of the change of the 70s the worst year for music in the 80s I think 87 or something I was watching you know We picked up the pops on like BBC two random years or whatever Yeah, and like November something or the 1987 came on every single track not only on the show but in the top 40 was fucking Yes, it was all actually never heard of or certainly didn't hang around too long after initial hit and it's just that most vanilla weak Kind of yeah, and very American as well. It got very Americanized up.
It was a mid 80s Didn't it that's when we were completely in raptured with stateside. Yes. Yeah, that's when like for instance Jonathan King who we can forego the usual topics about talking about him but he was a big proponent bringing that music over because I had an entertainment USA show and that He released a few albums of complications off the back as well to introduce Yeah, no, you're the record by him where he's basically done a satire record about Smurfs or something You say Jonathan King now or Paul Portner cuz I've got a song by him I do say by him you went by the conflate our guests with Jonathan King the well-known knots I'm saying you were talking about it, but when you made eye contact with me and you made a hand jester I knew you were talking about his another gesture Paul He didn't even saw that one! He doesn't even see that gesture again.
Well, Tom nothing came in. He had multi-personalities, didn't he? Bad names. He was lots of different.
Well, he didn't even have all these alter egos. He was the piglet, sort of, you know, 1 million tonnes in a feather or something. Yes. It's a weird record, which is about toys that are toxic.
There was a new story about toys, dolls that had bits of metal in or something. He's done like a novelty record. It was like a spoof advert or song or something. He did so much stuff hugely prolific, wasn't it?
Apparently named 10cc as well. Gave them their names. He gave 10cc their names. Apparently so.
Do you know what 10cc means? Well, allegedly it's how big a Spunk loader is or something, isn't it? It's a Spunk, though. It's not true.
No. I believe that erosnius. Sentilators. Sentilators.
Sentilators. I mean, judging by your dream last night, mate, more than 10cc. I thought he also came up with the name of Genesis, didn't he? Oh, I don't know that one.
It was a big name. Big name guy. Big name guy. And the other thing I heard about him, the rumor was that he was behind Who Let the Dogs Out.
Oh, God. The Promoting It. Does his crime never end? Does his crime never end?
The Baja Amen. What are they called? Yeah, the Baja Amen. Who Let the Dogs Out?
Well, 50. Well, what's the other round? There's a lot of songs with dogs. Do you know how many members of the Baja Amen?
How many Baja Men are 8? Nine. Nine. There's a lot of them.
They were like so solid crew. Yeah. Well, you don't need nine members in a band, right? Surely.
Well, don't piss. What kind of band? Well, they're playing instruments, fair enough. But if there's just five people standing in a row posing and saying, yeah, it's not a band to me.
That's a mob. Blazing squad will be turning in their grave. It's a squad mate. Probably.
At least half of them. Anyway, moving on. So he goes on to say, my issue was much like Mr Silver's got an issue. The vagueness of the guy's request in just 90s music.
So he asks him, is there anything in particular from the 90s you'd like to hear? Just to give me a baseline of what songs he wanted. Bit of Brit Pop alternative, maybe something a bit more electronic. The man just looked at me with the blank stare, the blank stare I've ever seen.
They kind of looked at him the hell he had long enough in hospital. You'd really know. That's you. You're reading bad again.
I am also reading bad. Anyway, he goes, I really don't know. Just some 90s or mid 2000s. I push for something to work with, like an artist or just a song.
Anything I can work with, and he thinks for a minute, what feels like an eternity? No, don't. And then goes Michael Jackson or something. And then disappeared into the crowd.
The writer. So thank you, Dylan. He says shine on. I thought he was going to stay like the lighthouse family or something like that.
That is the epitome of 90s bland here. When I used to DJ in the early norties, it was always always... You've got to need Jimira Kai. Oh.
You've got club classics. No, I've been asked to play easy listening at a friend's wedding. Well, I've been asked to play easy listening at a friend's wedding. Well, I've been asked to play easy listening at a friend's wedding.
Well, I've been asked to play easy listening at a friend's wedding. Well, I've been asked to do virtual music. No one wants it. No one wants it to hear easy listening.
They all want to hear Kylie and Abba and... You know, was that your specialty? Easy listening? I used to play lounge and kind of 60s mod type stuff.
Nice. And all that kind of new bit of new wave, but generally lounge-y, easy listening, library music. It used to be part of the club scene, Danny Beige, Regency Rooms. That was the sort of lounge revival, wasn't it?
Yeah, part of that in the mid-90s. Oh, that's where we got people like Mike Flowers Pops and stuff like that. Yeah, he used to come to him. I love some of that scene.
Yeah. What... Mike Roberts, he's a real name. What do you up to these days?
He still... I went and saw Mike Flowers Pops a few years ago. Really? Really brilliant night.
You know, because they were great musicians. And yeah, he's still... He was very shrewd, Mike Roberts. It's what he did.
It was something that someone like Soft Cell they didn't do. It was when he did Wonderwall. It was such a big hit. He made sure he'd written the B site, which was a trackled son of God on the CD single.
So in the old days, whenever you would sell that, you know, you would get a royalty. Whereas Mark Arman, of course, didn't, because the B site had tainted love. There's another cut. Yeah, where did our love go, isn't it?
So we got little, though, money from it. And also, completely forgotten. I've never heard that. Who?
You know, tainted Soft Cell's version of Where Did I Love Go. People used to get writing credits as Paola, as a bribe, really. So what do you mean? So someone will have, you know, you'd be a promoter or a DJ or something.
Yeah. You've got an artist and, you know, they want you to play the record. So as payment, you get your name on the writing credit. Oh, right.
Any examples? I can't think of any. Great stuff. I'll tell you what, since we're on that trip, let's take a quick break and we'll move on to the final selection now.
Should we do that? Yeah. Yay. I have no other out.
Right, we'll move on to the platters then. We've all set up, we've got a little record player. That's exciting. It's the first time we've got a little record player in our little house of Tudor, or whatever it's called, or whatever it's called, or what we call it.
It's actually mock mock Tudor, isn't it? I guess. Why does it double mock? Well, because it looks, yeah, it looks like...
Pretending to be mock Tudor, isn't it? So it's mock Tudor booth. They're mock Tudor booth. Yeah, nice.
Actually, you really like that now. So we wanted to talk about something very brief to start off. Just very briefly, was the death of Alan Horkshaw, who died as of recording. Yesterday was it, or the day before?
And we've mentioned him on the show in the past because he pops up a lot in Silverman's platters, because when we find these rare odd vinyl tracks of TV themes or whatever, his name isn't very bleh-onced a lot of them. Well, it's a huge name, wasn't he, in library music, I think? Yeah, and you know, he wrote Bran Stand, he wrote Countdown. Do you know every time Countdown is played, there's a donation to underprivileged kids who want to learn music?
Oh, I did not know that. Off the Twitterverse yesterday. Oh, and you know, he gifted the royalties. Yeah, he did a grain chair, of course.
Chicken Man. Which was also the theme for... Give us a clue. That would be such a cognitive...
what do they call it? It would do your headlines. It would do your head in, if you saw an old episode of Give us a clue, it would create the grain chair. And they were running concurrently.
Yeah, they were just screaming at the TV. They can't do this, Mum. It's just a theme to... And then Lionel Blair would come on and he'd really fucking have to bite down.
I'm sorry, he's playing it. What are you biting down on? Lionel Wiens. What's wrong with Lionel Blair?
He's so bizarre. Do you remember what the theme to became for Give us a clue? Give us a clue. Give us a clue.
Give us a clue. We've Lionel Blair and Lisa Godard. We've got a book. We've got Lisa Godard.
Lisa Godard. Give us a clue. Give us a clue. Yeah, I like that.
It was a class board. You hosted it for a while? Or was it Parkinson's? I quite enjoyed that show.
But Blair, I'd be up all night basically. Maybe you know, he'd be bribing and then it'd come on and be like, God, I can't take his energy. That's what you don't like about him. You were up in that show over 40 years ago.
How long were you in the future? Yeah, right. It was a repeat. Oh, he's got a challenge, David.
He'd be stowing at three in the morning getting angry to Lionel Blair on TV. Wow. What a life you must have left. And then sometimes they put on like a blankly blank.
Which era? The Dawson era. Oh, I love that stuff. Yeah, I think I was watching on recently with Frank Carson on, and like Frank Carson was doing this whole bit throughout his things where like he was taking forever to come up with his answers and Les Dors was getting visibly annoyed.
And so, toward the end of the episode, Frank Carson goes, I've finished and Les Dors was in this career you have made and then just walked on with the show. It was like such a little bitchy mope. And I was like, that's why we love Les Dors. Oh, fantastic performance.
Because to be fair, like Wogan, they both didn't take the format seriously. It was just Les Dors and kind of really didn't like the format. It also was, you know, a fantastic comedian. Yeah.
Improvise a intermediary comedian, whereas Wogan, you know, didn't really have the funny chops, did he? No, but he had the genial warmth and charm that you needed. And again, he was kind of a bit more flippant with it as well. I remember the Christmas one with Les Dors and comes on, they got a big Christmas tree in the studio with all the gifts underneath.
He just comes with shoe boxes pretending to be present. I love it. Yeah, he's all expert in puncturing the pretense and pretense of it. Because the whole thing about BBC versus ITV game shows was the ITV could spend more money on prizes.
Whereas the BBC used their remit were allowed to have big prizes on their shows full stop. Certainly up until the mid 80s when things changed. So knowing that, all the prizes on blankity blank was shit. Checkbook pen.
Yeah, well, you know, they were comparatively less exciting than I've ever wanted. They must be worth, well, this is it, isn't it? They're probably very collectible. There's anything on that in your loft, are you?
You got a bully from Bullseye? No, not a Jim or Fixie pen. I'm going to say, yeah, I'm not that. No, no, no, I'm trying to think.
I've got a postcard from 1977 from Nationwide thanking me for my contribution to Richard Stillgo's section of the show called Pigeonhole. I don't remember the Pigeonhole. Yeah, it was cool. It was like a kind of consumer bit of the show.
And I did this thing called Dust Panorama where it was about litter. And I had this idea of talking litter bins that say, put, feed me, you know, put something in my mouth all of that. Don't please move on quick before we take a bottle. And you get a free gift for every 1,000 person puts litter in, I mean, completely impractical.
Yeah. And I drew a picture and they put it on the program. Oh, no, that's not true. No, it's not.
I've looked. I even got my mould in the BBC archive to try and find it. But, I mean, Nationwide was like the one show, wasn't it? Every night.
Yes. Nationwide? I like the theme change in Nationwide. I don't remember that, isn't it?
Isn't it? Like electric guitar and synth. justifying the theme change change, from the bar, the bar, the bar, the bar, the bar. Oh yeah I got it.
That's the one. For me, I think I'm wondering if we could put his finger in that? I don't know. Oh yeah, we meant before my wrist.
They went over the tired did all the game shows. So yeah, he passed away recently and we've talked about his stuff on the show before. And I just thought it would be nice to mention him passing. Yeah, yeah.
It was brilliant. There's that video that I was doing the All Stars, before theON could STF called The Strings but the Key But here's a bit trivia. So that's why I get confused, because there's Hawk in both those names and they work together. Yeah, it's Brian Bennett who's in the shadows.
Yeah, so this is kind of the thing they got together to make blobby music to basically. Bennett did some amazing, fun, instrumental albums. Sorry, Paul, you were saying you had a fake factoid? Yeah, well, it's a factoid.
It's trivia. Can you tell me who Alan Hawkesha's daughter is? Oh, Miss Hawkesha. Yeah, lady Hawkesha.
Name's Kirsty, and she had the hit in the 90s. It's gonna be a fine day today. Do you remember that one? Oh, I didn't remember that one.
Shaved head and had those balls. Opus two, was it? Opus two? Yeah.
It's dangling on the edge of my memory, but I don't know. It was everywhere. It was a cover of Edward Barton, who's like the kind of weird left-field poet musician. Okay.
And she did a dance version. It's so early 90s, you know, probably candy flip stuff. Yeah. Okay.
I don't remember that song. I mean, I'm not saying it for you, Paul. It's going to be a fine day today. It's going to be a fine day tomorrow.
It's going to be a fine day today. It's going to be a fine day tomorrow. Yeah, no, it didn't really help. Thank you.
Because in my head, I'll go off. I will see the sunshine after the rain. I want to see blue birds over the first. What's that one?
Exactly. I remember that shit. I remember that. Take me dancing naked in the rain.
Feel it washing over me. What about sunshine on a rainy day? With my soul. Make my soul.
You sure make me feel like love, then you. Oh, that's that sample, isn't it? Don't know a thingy music from the 80s. Don't know what?
Serious, the practical series. Yeah, quite good. You know that I'm every woman. It's all in me.
I wish you should just say, climb every mountain. You could do that. That's Shaka Khan. Shaka Khan.
Shaka Khan. Shaka Khan. Shaka Khan. Really?
Yes. Sometimes you just say random shit and I go, yeah, that's all right. Then you're a liar. Who was that one he did sunshine on a rainy day?
She's called Zoe, wasn't she? I don't know. There were so many in and out one. She was a shiver wasn't it?
Yeah. Another one and showed her ammo. Oh, I know her personally. Yeah.
What was she doing? She's a very good friend of my sisters. Oh, lived where I lived in Kilbon. What did she do?
What's the song? She did a cover of the Randy Crawford song. You might need somebody. You might need somebody.
I got to need somebody who? Yeah. This is a lovely sing song. I will say that.
I'm not going to record. We've got records. We've got records. What did you want to play for us today?
Well, I didn't. I mean, it's not all music. No, that's great. A few things.
What is that? Lough Stance Party. Lough Stance Party and fun. So tell us a little bit about Lough.
Lough. He's a member of the Jahn Carson. Scanning, he was a comedian, actor and skilled drummer. He did loads of stuff.
He was in movies and sitcoms and he had this band. And he had this band. And they're pretty funky. Now this, the track I'd like you to play is called Viroka.
I don't know if that's any Swedish listeners of the podcast. It's something about, you don't have to smoke gear basically to have fun. Oh, I quietly disagree. But I love the back cover.
Oh, I love it. Paul, you okay? You say you have to smoke weed to have fun? No, I'm sorry.
I mean, do we need to talk about this? No. That's what you kind of said because I'm worried. I'm trying to free side.
I tell you translated it for me. This is a big name drop. The title. Nicholas Lindhurst.
Really? Well, he's from Swedish shop. Oh, so you can speak Swedish. You're going to need to take the other platter off the table.
Do you need a hand, Paul? No. Do you want to go smoke some week and make it more fun? No, of course.
Make this fun. You like to shoot. Perhaps you'd like to chase the dragon. I'm getting to the point where I wish I fucking caught.
Chase the dragon. You'll chase my dragon. As in what? I'm doing the jungle and tough you off.
Now the cover of this record, he's got some stuff on his face. Doesn't he? He's got a cake on his head. They're the last old thing on the back.
They're the last old thing on the back. They're the last old thing on the back. They're the last old thing on the back. That was for a sketch where it was on the front of the album, and it was an album called The Gives Coming into the Shot and Mispronounced Dela Sol.
You've got any day-last hole? I've never seen anything by this guy. We're working into a Hashi-sanist rod. We're less digging and think for us.
We are the best example of the world. We're the land we're giving the air-as-kaws. We're the owner of the festival, the land we're in. We're the first to be in a ring in an herd.
They're all very long-to-ish. It's something that the guy has enthralled you. What's he got on his head, man? It's really disturbing.
But it's egg, and what's this up at the top? It's like tomato bits or something. Oh, it's a tomato. Oh, that's nasty.
He's got egg and tomato on his face. He's got tomato seeds on his forehead. This is bizarre. So there we go, a little snippet of that.
That was lovely. Yeah, really nice. So he was mostly known as a comedian actor. Primarily.
I mean, I gather in Sweden. Yeah, that is what he was known to be in Sweden. And yeah, that is what he was known as, but he obviously had this, didn't maybe just like that, that burials, I know maybe. Because I was going to say just based on the little bit we heard in the track we also had on side two, which was the Sesame Street theme, a lot of different styles.
And it wasn't like it was just one type of like, for instance, when we did the Roy J album, he was basically trying to become a soul singer for the whole, the song he was making. Whereas this seems a little bit more eclectic across the board in terms of stuff you can have fun. And in fact, on the track listing, on the back, he's given you a little guide to the genre. So, Tati Bow Bow.
That's brilliant. Tati Bow Bow Bow Bow Bow Bow Bow Bow Bow Bow Bow. Sorry. Tati Bow Bow Bow Bow Bow Bow Bow Bow Bow Bow Bow.
Yeah, it's Tati Bow Bow Bow Bow. We were talking about, it's not about Ken Dodd's dog. Strange is in the night, beat ballad. See now I just want to get the rest of this album.
I just- I just- Swing beat, that was the Sesame Street theme and swing beat style, like that. It works surprisingly well. Pop Dixie, pop funky. There's one that's pop funky.
What would pop Dixie be? It's Dixie pop, isn't it? Come on. Just change the order of the world.
It's Tati Bow. It's Dixie land with a pop feel. So what kind of ragtimey? Yeah.
Dixie. Philip Sousa and isn't it all that kind of? Oh, okay. On a steamboat going up the Mississippi music, isn't it?
Right, okay. All right, got it. Now I understand. Thank you Paul, not just go, I'll probably go back and back it up.
He knows nothing. He knows nothing. Unfortunately, I'm willing to learn. Oh, I'll teach you.
You're not going to teach me anything other than I was a wanker than a gonger. So we're going to move on from that. So why did you want to bring that along today? What is it about that that you really like?
I just- It was one of these, yeah, I found it in a charity shop. It's really unusual when you go to the record section in a Sue Ryder. And then you suddenly see, obviously, someone's record collection. And it's just a load of Israeli albums or a lot of...
There's a lot of barber strides and that ends up getting thrown out. Yeah, or German albums, artists. James Last, tons of those. I love that when you can see, and you're trying to read into sort of their personality when you see, yeah, you think there's obviously from the same person's direction.
Remind me. Well, that reminded the point I was going to make actually. So I went to a pinhead to go round the charity shops there because there's a great St. Luke's charity shop there that sells random crazy shit.
It's one of those charities that reminds you more of someone's Attica than a shop. And I bought this album called 50 years in the BBC. It was like, what was that British actor with the moustache? Big guy?
He's like, Leo, I want some current. Yeah, Leo McCurn narrates the issue of the BBC for the first 50 years with clips thrown in like a D-Day on the Queen's car. Grumpole's the baby. Yeah.
And then the top corner on this album, I noticed a little sticker of who it belonged to. Bob Holness. And I was like, he can't be the same. Bob Holness.
But it turned out, yeah, it was Bob Holness because he lived in Pinner. That's nice. It had his address and his number of whatever year you bought the album the same thing. So it was out of it.
It was like, he was listening his... You know, the people used to sort of... what do they do, catalogue their own? Yeah.
They had a very professional little sticker on the corner. And it was not... No, just Bob Holness. Here's address and his phone number for some sort of reason.
He called him out, so I got your record Bob. No, he's dead, any. That's one of the problems with returning things to people. Call him out anyway.
What's your record Bob? And perhaps he'll get through to the afterlife. It's always sad when you see signed stuff in charity shops. You think, oh, journey that's been on.
Yeah. I bought a 12-inch a while back, signed by all the members of the Inspiral Carpets. That's the life. Wow.
And it's not even like one of the... our record you remember. So it's obviously when they were kind of on their uppers. Yeah.
I think someone must have met them and had that signed. I did. Why would you just give it to a charity shop? Yeah.
I've found a book, The Meaning of Life book, signed with a personalized message by Michael Palin. Really? So make sure this book doesn't fall into the wrong hands. Michael Palin from whenever the book came out.
It has fallen into the life. Or the meaning of life. Or the life of life. No, the life of life.
It's hard back. I don't think so. No, it was a film tie-in book when meaning of life. Oh, Python.
I've got a hard back edition of it. Yeah, I've got the soft back. Why did he get rid of it then? Well, maybe because he's burning comedy history away for some straight.
I don't know. Can I just mention this, he's got a fucking mess on his face on the cover of this. It's fun. It's got like tomatoes, the seeds are all coming down.
There's a little bubble of fucking spit coming back out his lips. He's got egg, and he's got all nasty creamy stuff. But isn't that good though? She has a lack of vanity.
He's a fun-time guy. I don't know. You know that up the arse corner in this comment? Yeah.
Yeah. He's the next thing a lady in black and white on the back as well. I hope there's some other albums on the back here which I'm in a bit more of a kind of... Is he doing Lotho's Glen Miller and Lotho's Poppin' Party?
Paul, that's an American. Can you say something for me? Yes. In a French accent, go on.
Happiness in the household. Happiness in the asshole. I mean, that's what you wanted me to say. That's what I want from you.
The problem is you know if you just said Paul, would you say, a piece of the asshole? We'll just also say that. Next, wonderful. I'm going to give that actually four.
That's it. I definitely will be picking up anything I see by him. I see something like that. That looks really fun.
The music is pretty good. They're having some kind of studio party. Perhaps that's when he's bombing her. Right.
Oh, yeah. I love these kind of records. I've started it. Talking, bludgy regard.
It's a budgy training record. Oh, mate. Have I told that story of the podcast before? I've made a bugy call.
I've told you it didn't I recently. I've made it really brief. I made it really brief. I've made it really brief.
He called it, what's he called it? Twinkle or something, I can't fucking remember now. You know, he's trying to make it talk for a year straight. My mate will just talk to his bud.
Say twinkle, say twinkle, say twinkle, say twinkle, and then he let the cassette overnight playing on a loop. That would have his voice saying. Say twinkle, twinkle. over to his one weekend for a stayover, we're sitting in the kitchen, you know, having breakfast in the morning and all of a sudden from the cage we hear the bird go twinkle, flutter and then die, it just flew off the perch and it died right there and then I think it was just too much for him, the kind of where you're kind of golf war torture tactic was under at time.
So Philip Marsden, although Burjorie Garres are native to Australia, they have been domesticated in many countries for well over a century, blah blah blah blah, in America they're known as parakeets, I actually didn't know they were one of the same things. I did not know that either because you get a load of parakeets, they're in parks in London now, squawking, flying around, the little green Burjorie Gar was discovered by Philip Marsden in the BBC Cage Words contest in 1958. Now what is this record, is this a record of talking Burjorie Garres or is it to train them? It's quite interesting really and as it says on the back cover, which I thought was astonishing, so I thought, shut up, they're saying it is not faked, this is the voice of this budgie.
So you're complaining that nothing you hear on the album has been, it's being done on the house. So you're using a budgie to teach your budgie to speak, because why, it's easier for them to pick it up with a budgie saying it, I don't get that. But it's actually mildly terrifying as well. That was the voice of my old friend Sparky Williams and disputed talking champion of the budgie world, and I can't imagine we'll ever see his like again.
You'll hear him often in this recording, not only to entertain an interest, but also to demonstrate just what a bird can do when he's been properly trained and cared for, not all birds are as capable as this, and not many owners either, but the system behind the training is no secret, and side two of this record will describe it in detail. On side one, I hope to tell you enough about the budgie regard to provide at least a basic understanding of his capabilities and needs, because he's only through understanding that one can really come to terms with another creature, be it human, animal, bird, or even fish. Few birds have been more closely studied than the melapsiticus and your artist, that's his scientific title, and consequently we are no strangers to his makeup. We do know what makes him tick both physically and psychologically, and since he's basically such a simple and straightforward little character, you don't have to be a genius to understand him.
You don't need an academic turn of mind to be able to train him and teach him to talk, and you don't need to be a vet to keep him healthy and happy. Three things you do need are love, patience, and a little practical knowledge of the essential needs of this lively little creature whose life is literally in your hands. The fact that you're listening to this record, I think, suggests that you're already well equipped with the first two requirements, and that being so, it's a real pleasure to be able to offer you the third. And there's something slightly sinister about his voice as well.
What it sounds like when you play the budgie, it's when you hear tapes of ghosts talking, you know, when you say that, oh, I went to an old church and I recorded this voice, it's like, that budgie sounds like an EVP. I thought it was one of those very early coders. But I went on YouTube for now, I'm not having this and looked up talking budgies, now with contemporary clips. And yeah, it's for real.
Yeah, that's the sentence that was regarded as quite long and complicated. It's not like he was doing a bell and probably not. It was like a full sentence with a flute addiction. Yeah, that's why I was kind of like, that's fake.
Right? It just sounds like it's why he's talking through a toilet roll. Yeah, but now apparently I've listened to contemporary budgies and they all have to sit in their thoughts and say, gosh, that's I don't know why they're not as good. They're not as good at talking as parrots though, are they?
Well, no. Or minor birds. No, or major birds. Poor.
I don't care. Oh, there's this Raven I watch on YouTube, Fable. It's got his own channel. And the trainer has set up a video camera in the hutch where Fable lives and they've got this feature Fable practicing talking.
Yeah, that's really crazy stuff. It's the bit just in the background with the tone and sort of playing with the tone. So it's like, hey, thanks, twin or something. I guess that's what like impressionists do though, when they're trying to get their voice right for whatever.