EP 282: Feeling Enough No Matter What with Jessie

This call is about feeling safe and feeling enough. Today's caller, Jessie, has been struggling with childhood trauma and is self-soothing by buying things she doesn't need. Any of you who struggle with not-enoughness, or have been labeled as having ADD, or are not sure if you have dealt with your childhood trauma, this is a great episode for you.   [For show notes go here: Christinehassler.com/episode282]   The unconscious drives about 90-95% of our behavior. We come from our past trauma or our limiting beliefs until we reach a point where we are aware of it and choose and attract something differently.   Often, people who struggle with low self-worth or of not-enoughness are constantly trying to compensate by doing, talking, and proving. They are not great at reaching out for support because there is a level of trauma that still is running the show. There comes a point when trauma becomes part of our learning and part of the things that helped us grow and part of the things that have evolved our soul but before it gets there it becomes the thing to create our reality until we shift it.   For coaches and therapists, when you have a client who seems to dart around and doesn't land on one thing for very long, it indicates that they just don't feel safe, and feeling safe is everything.   Remember, we attract at the level of our issues until we heal those and move into a different frequency.   Connecting to your inner child is February's topic for the Virtual Group Coaching Call on February 11, 2021. $20 is all it costs to connect with your inner child and other like-minded people.   Join Stefanos and me for our 3-day virtual Inner Child Workshop. It's not about working on yourself. It's about connecting to your little one and letting go of some things you have been carrying around. We can help you bring your little one into their future, which is your present, and help them feel loved and safe. Don't let money be an issue, we have scholarships! Christinehassler.com/innerchild or email [email protected] — March 19–21, 2021   Do you want to make coaching your career? Join our 6-month coach training program. You will be mentored by me and three other master-level coaches. Plus you will have the opportunity to be a coach in the program moving forward. Go to Christinehassler.com/coachtraining   Consider/Ask Yourself: Do you shop too much or have some kind of behavior you know is not healthy but you just can't stop yourself from doing it? Do you struggle with feeling not enough? Do you have a lot of childhood trauma or chaos you have done your best to cope with but don't know if you are totally free? Have you and do you accept all parts of yourself?   Jessie's Question: Jesse struggles with childhood trauma and not-enoughness. She wants to feel safe and enough.   Jessie's Key Insights and Ahas: She buys things she feels will make her look a certain way. Her mother is overly critical. She self-soothes with shopping. She doesn't feel safe. She lost her brother and her dad early in life. She has been labeled as having ADD. She lived in fear as a child due to her dad's abusiveness. She has done talk therapy. She is overwhelmed when she has to do adult things. She feels alone. There was chaos in her childhood. Her nervous system is delicate. She is trying to handle too much at once.   How to Get Over It and On With It: Grieve the relationship she hasn't had. Invoke the loving mother inside herself. Stop judging herself for doing something she is trying to transform. Stop dating for a while. Find a source for trauma or somatic therapy with whom she feels safe. Understand there is nothing wrong with her.   Takeaways For You: Ask your body, which is connected to your inner child, what it needs? If you are a parent, one of the best things you can do is do your own work. Invest in yourself. If you are a great parent to your inner child, you will be a better parent to your own child. Join the inner child workshop. Seek out support and get help. Sign up for the group call or join the Inner Child Workshop.   Sponsor: Rothy's — Give yourself stylish, comfortable, versatile shoes made from eco-friendly material, including repurposed plastic water bottles and marine plastics from Rothy's. They are the softest shoes you will ever put on your feet. Check out the latest shoes, handbags, and masks from Rothy's by using this link Rothys.com/over. With free returns and exchanges on eligible products.   Resources: Christine Hassler — Join the Free Over It and On With It Community Christine Hassler Podcasts Including Coaches Corner Christine on Facebook Expectation Hangover, by Christine Hassler @ChristinHassler on Twitter @ChristineHassler on Instagram @SacredUnionCouples on Instagram [email protected] [email protected] — For information on any of my services. Get on the Waitlist to be coached on the show Get on the list to be notified about the upcoming certification program for coaches.