EP 287.5: Am I Eating Enough or Eating Too Much? How to Know in Eating Disorder Recovery

If you've spent years in restriction, figuring out "normal" eating can feel impossible. Am I finally eating enough, or am I overeating? This confusion is more common than you think. In today's coaching over coffee episode, we're tackling the question that keeps so many women stuck in recovery: How do you know if you're eating the right amount when your hunger cues are broken and everything feels foreign? In this practical episode, you'll discover: Why questioning if you need more food usually means YES, you do How to tell the difference between normal eating and actual binge eating The non-negotiable food framework that creates stability Why what feels like "too much" is often just enough Simple strategies to rebuild trust with your body's signals The "two more bites" rule that changed everything How to create mindful, honoring meal experiences For the woman who's tired of questioning every bite and ready to trust her body again. THE GOLDEN RULE: IF YOU'RE QUESTIONING, THE ANSWER IS YES If you find yourself questioning whether you should have another bite or more food—the answer is YES. When you've eaten enough food, you won't need to ask whether you've eaten enough food. This simple truth cuts through the mental noise and gives you permission to trust the impulse for more. THE RECOVERY REALITY: WHAT FEELS LIKE "TOO MUCH" In early recovery, I thought I was binge eating when I was actually just eating normally for the first time in years. The reality: After severe restriction, any increase in food feels like "too much" because you've never allowed yourself adequate amounts. Ask yourself honestly: Are you eating the whole cabinet in a trance-like state? Or are you simply having more than you previously allowed? Most likely, you're experiencing normal eating quantities that feel foreign after restriction—not actual binge eating. THE NON-NEGOTIABLE FRAMEWORK Start with the basics: Breakfast, lunch, dinner, and two snacks. Every single day. Minimum. Coming from restriction where you skipped meals, avoided eating, or used various disorder tactics, this structure creates stability. The volume will feel different—and that's the point. You're making up for lost time and teaching your body it can trust you again. REBUILDING YOUR RELATIONSHIP WITH AMOUNTS The Observation Strategy Watch people without eating disorders. Notice what they order, what normal portions look like, how they eat without internal negotiation. Not for comparison—for education. This helps calibrate what "normal" actually looks like. The Time Check Method When questioning if you should eat: When was the last time you ate something? If it's been over an hour, that's a good opportunity for food. The Two More Bites Rule When you think you're "done": Take two more bites. This creates a safety buffer while giving permission to have more than restriction previously allowed. The Food Pairing Practice Always combine: Carb + protein + healthy fat. This fights the "good vs. bad foods" mentality while ensuring balanced nutrition. CONSCIOUS EATING VS. RESTRICTIVE EATING Conscious eating means: Electronics away, work away Sitting with feelings and thoughts that arise Eating even when not hungry as part of your commitment Taking pleasure in the experience Create honoring experiences: Set candles, buy flowers for your table Use beautiful dinner plates Eat around supportive people for accountability Make mealtime sacred, not rushed REBUILDING HUNGER CUES Your hunger cues may be broken from years of ignoring them. Your body learned not to signal hunger because you weren't going to respond anyway. This is normal and temporary. As you consistently nourish yourself, these signals will return. In the meantime: Follow your meal plan regardless of hunger signals. You're rebuilding trust. THE FOOD JOURNAL APPROACH Instead of calorie counting or macro tracking: Use your journal to explore the eating experience. Track feelings, not numbers: How do I feel before the meal? (anxious, neutral, excited) How do I feel during? (this tastes good, I'm enjoying this) How do I feel after? (energized, satisfied, guilty, peaceful) This builds awareness without the restriction mindset. CHALLENGING FOOD RULES Example: At a barbecue with burgers and buns Old rule: "I don't eat buns" or "I just ate before coming" Recovery challenge: Have the burger AND the bun Ask yourself: Am I honoring what's available, or am I following old restrictions disguised as "not being hungry"? ABUNDANCE VS. SCARCITY MINDSET When asking "Can I have more?" check your motivation: Scarcity mindset: "I shouldn't want more, I've had enough, I need to control this" Abundance mindset: "My body is asking for nourishment, I can trust this signal, there's plenty of food" Recovery operates from abundance. There's enough food. You're allowed to want more. Your body knows what it needs. THE NICOLE HOBBS QUOTE THAT CHANGES EVERYTHING "I do not want to be remembered as a woman who was always exhausted, always stressed, always rushing. I would like to be remembered as a relaxed woman, a compassionate woman, a woman who works hard and rests deeply, who loves fiercely and lives peacefully. A woman who knows her worth and her power, who accepts her imperfections and embraces her possibilities." This is your best self. This is who you're becoming through recovery—a woman who honors her body without constant internal negotiation. KEY QUOTES 💛 "If you're questioning whether you should have more food, the answer is yes." 💛 "When you've eaten enough, you won't need to ask if you've eaten enough." 💛 "What feels like binge eating is often just eating normally for the first time." 💛 "You're making up for lost time and honoring your body." 💛 "Recovery operates from abundance, not scarcity." 💛 "Your body will learn to tell you, but right now it needs consistent nourishment." 💛 "Get exploratory—it's an experiment in learning the new version of yourself." YOUR RECOVERY EXPERIMENTS THIS WEEK Try one of these approaches: When questioning if you want more, take two additional bites Pair every meal and snack with carb + protein + fat Create one beautiful, mindful eating experience with candles/flowers Eat around supportive people instead of isolating Journal your before/during/after meal feelings Remember: This is exploration, not perfection. Connect with Lindsey: 🌟 Website: www.herbestself.co 🌟 Instagram: @thelindseynichol 🌟 Free FB Community: www.herbestselfsociety.com 🌟Client Application: HBS Co. Recovery Coaching - Client Application - Google Forms Love this episode? Here's how you can support the show: 💕 Share it with a woman who might need to hear this message 💕 Leave a review on Apple Podcasts - it helps other women find the show 💕 Screenshot and tag @thelindseynichol if any of these steps help you this week! Remember, beautiful: Your worth is not measured by how perfectly you do recovery. Healing isn't linear, progress over perfection always, and you are exactly where you need to be right now. Her Best Self with Lindsey Nichol is a podcast for women in eating disorder recovery who are ready to break free from perfectionism, people-pleasing, and diet culture to live authentically and wholeheartedly. *While I am a certified health coach, anorexia survivor & eating disorder recovery coach, I do not intend the use of this message to serve as medical advice. Please refer to the disclaimer here in the show & be sure to contact a licensed clinical provider if you are struggling with an eating disorder.