Ep. 30: The Cost of Telling the Truth: Grief, Love, and Online Violence with Nikki Apostolou

Dr. Candace Linklater and guest Nikki Apostolou (aka Recycled Stardust) delve into the meaning of living with integrity, community engagement, and staying rooted in love amidst heartbreak, colonization, and online violence. Nikki opens up about how painful it’s been to have her character misrepresented, especially in online spaces where false narratives spread quickly and people rush to judgment. She shares the grief of being pushed into silence to protect others, the toll of being dehumanized, and the internal struggle of trying to keep her heart soft when it would be easier to turn cold.The two women unpack the complex dynamics of lateral violence in Indigenous communities and how colonization has trained people to harm one another, even when they’re fighting for the same liberation. They talk about the weaponization of vulnerability, especially online, and the difference between true accountability and performative call-outs. Nikki reflects on how she’s had to grieve not only what was lost in a relationship but also the loss of trust in a community she once felt safe in. Candace names the bravery in choosing to love anyway, to keep speaking truth even when it costs something, and to reclaim joy as a radical act of resistance.BioNikki Apostolou (aka Recycled Stardust) is a proud Mohawk content creator and plus-size model, widely known for her viral presence in beauty, fashion, and New York City lifestyle storytelling. With over a decade of experience sharing her passion for makeup, style, and city life, she’s built a loyal following of over 400,000 across Instagram and TikTok. Nikki’s content is a celebration of body positivity, Indigenous pride, and unapologetic self-expression.She has walked the runways of New York Fashion Week, representing Indigenous designers and bringing Native excellence to high fashion. Her bold storytelling and signature confidence have earned her features in major media outlets, including CNN, PopSugar, Insider, and Yahoo. Whether she’s breaking beauty standards or elevating Indigenous visibility, Nikki continues to inspire and influence with authenticity and heart.IG and TikTok: @recycledstardust-Relentless Reflection What version of me am I protecting by staying silent? What am I afraid would happen if I showed up more vulnerably, or spoke truth when it’s uncomfortable?How do I discern between harm and discomfort? Am I open to growth that feels hard but is rooted in care, or am I avoiding it by labelling it as an attack?Relentless Action Before reposting, commenting, or aligning with a narrative, ask yourself: Do I know the whole story? Am I perpetuating harm by reacting without understanding?Take stock of your values and your actions. Where do they align, and where don’t they? Commit to one tangible shift that brings your actions closer to your values, especially in how you show up for others in community.Relentless ResourcesSpill by Alexis Pauline GumbsDecolonizing Trauma Work by Renee LinklaterSend Us a Text with Your Thoughts or Questions!Join the RIW Patreon Community RIW WebsiteMusic Produced by Award-Winning Anishnaabe DJ Boogey the Beat