Ep 35 (6 Reprise): White Fragility, DARVO, and Accepting Feedback

Send us a message via text message! Link accessible at joyousjustice.buzzsprout.com. ✅QUICK EPISODE OVERVIEWApril and Tracie discuss Robin DiAngelo's book, White Fragility. They unpack some of the courage and vulnerability it takes to both give and receive feedback around racism, and imagine a world in which it is safe to do both.Find April and Tracie's full bios and submit topic suggestions for the show at www.JewsTalkRacialJustice.comLearn more about Joyous Justice where April is the founding and fabulous (!) director and Tracie is a senior partner: https://joyousjustice.com/Read more of Tracie's thoughts at bmoreincremental.comRESOURCES MENTIONED ON THE SHOWWhite Fragility by Robin DiAngelo: https://www.robindiangelo.com/publications/DARVO as a pattern of gaslighting in response to allegations of abuse was originally introduced by Jennifer J. Freyd, Ph.D.: https://dynamic.uoregon.edu/jjf/defineDARVO.htmlBrené Brown's podcast, Unlocking Us explores the importance of vulnerability: https://brenebrown.com/podcast/introducing-unlocking-us/DISCUSSION QUESTIONSTracie begins the episode describing what white fragility is. If you are White, can you think of a time when you’ve reacted in this way? Moving forward, what do you intend to do differently if in a similar situation? If you are a person of color who has witnessed white fragility, how was it similar and different to what Tracie is describing? Tracie shared a story offered by Robin DiAngelo in which Robin received feedback from a Black colleague. In reflecting on this story, Tracie and April reflect on how vulnerable it is to both give and receive feedback. How do I react when I receive feedback? How do I give it? What power dynamics may be at play that I don’t realize in that interaction? Tracie mentions that Robin DiAngelo no longer has a Twitter presence and has faced criticism for her book, about which you can read here. Linguist John McWhorter, while he finds DiAngelo is well-intentioned, describes how he feels that her proscriptions she offers are actually racist themselves and do not respect the resilience of Black people. How does his analysis land with you? How can we both be aware of white fragility and take concrete, anti-racist actions in our institution to advance equity and justice? April describes in depth the internal questioning that she, as a Black woman, goes through when engaging in conversations with White folks and what their reaction might be to her. How can White folks do better at creating environments that alleviate these fears? April and Tracie mention a binary that has developed in White community where “bad people” are oppositional from the “good people”; it is these “bad people” who are racist. When April and Tracie say that this isn’t helpful, why do you think that is so? Tracie asks you to identify an accountability partner for this work. Who is that in your life? Support the showDiscussion and reflection questions:What in this episode is new for you? What have you learned and how does it land?What is resonating? What is sticking with you and why?What, if anything feels hard? What is challenging or on the edge for you?If relevant. what feelings and sensations are arising as you reflect on themes from this episode, and where in your body do you feel them?What key insights or strategies are you carrying forward and how do you want to weave them into your living and/or leadership?