(Ep. 35) What happens when the pain is simply too BIG?!?

What if the tools that usually calm you stop working the moment you need them most — when the fear is so big you can't even think?In this episode of Triggered & True, Laura Duncan and co-host Brian Freise answer a question every anxious heart will recognize. A listener who'd binged 24 episodes wrote in: when her husband was in a car accident and she spent three hours not knowing if he was okay, she tried the remote control exercise — and couldn't make it work. She spiraled into a full panic attack she couldn't climb out of until the text came he was alright. So what do you do when the pain is simply too big?Laura walks through why the exercise stalls in a genuine crisis: when your brain flips into survival mode, you get stuck in the big "reaction" emotions — terror, panic, worst-case scenarios — and can't reach the tender feelings underneath where comfort actually lands. She and Brian offer real, in-the-trenches workarounds: why pausing can feel almost heartless but is the most loving thing you can do, why the crisis is usually stacking on older, unhealed pain, why the mind always races to the worst case (and how that traumatizes us with an event that hasn't even happened), and how, with practice, you can find peace inside the very circumstances you can't control.In this episode: 🔹 Why the remote control exercise stalls in a real crisis — and how survival mode hijacks you 🔹 Reaction emotions vs. tender emotions: why you get stuck, and where comfort actually lands 🔹 Why pausing feels heartless in the moment, but is the most loving thing you can do 🔹 How a present crisis stacks on older pain — and why that makes it feel unbearable 🔹 Why the mind races to worst-case scenarios, and how that traumatizes you with what hasn't happenedA gentle note: this episode discusses panic attacks and a frightening accident, told with care and hope. If you're struggling with anxiety or panic, be gentle with yourself as you listen, and reach out to someone you trust.📩 Get your free Weekly Dose of Compassion — two short notes in your inbox every week. One to speak over yourself. One from Laura: https://www.lauraduncan.com/pl/2148814868🔗 Learn more: https://triggeredandtrue.com https://lauraduncan.com