Sorry, what? I'm not funny. That's the most you've laughed. Yeah.
Everybody, hello. But we've been trying to do this cold out. I opened so many times. And just he like to said, he's not funny.
So what have I got here? I'm sorry for not being funny this week, everybody. I'm also sorry in advance. You work late.
You work late. I work late two nights this weekend as well. We work hard for the money. So hard for the money.
And then I don't know how it goes after that. And she's really gonna get it, right? Right. Tonight.
Hello, welcome to Cheep Show. Oh. That's not, that's not. What?
I just not used that. That's not weird. That's not you, that's not you. That's not you, that's not you.
We can do one. Let's just do a normal one. Hi everybody. Hello.
Oh, you decided to listen to Cheep Show. Thank you. Congratulations. You've made a wise purchase.
It is a little bit of an acquired taste. It might not be for you. It's a little bit poor. A little bit.
No, no, no. Peek-on. Very much. Peek-on.
It can be peek-on. It can be shockingly sweet. Yes. It can be.
Oh, sour. It could be very sour. It could be very sour. It could be bitter.
It's always bitter. It's always bitter. It's always bitter. The most bitter podcast I know.
Sometimes a little bit of the podcast dries in the corner of our mouth. It turns into a frosty, crusty, crusty, a crust foam. And then you watch it as it bulbs up and down as the person's talking. All I'm saying is this podcast isn't acquired.
It's say something that might not be for you, so please consume this podcast with consideration. Olives, for example. Olives. Like you just said, Olives for no reason.
Why'd you do that? But Olives are famously acquired taste. You know what? I've never taken your opinion on Olives.
Olives, poor. You see, this is the kind of stuff we do on Cheep Show. Olives. Olives.
I'm talking about Olives. Where do you stand? I like Olives. You do?
I don't like olives because I feel like they have a secret. Yeah, they have a secret. Or they have a... Or they have a...
Or they have an image or mouths. They have an image or palettes. Inature palettes, hey? You know, that's the kind of thing cheap.
Does this conversation with a great example? Olives! Olives conversation! How great are we?
All sorts of what? Olives. Kind of olives, are they? Oh, foreshadowing.
Yeah. Well, we need to get to the credits, Paul, because we're going to have to. Well, we're going to have to. Because this might be the most struggle we've had in a while doing a cold open, and you're listening to it going, I've never heard this podcast before, and what's all this shit?
I'm turning it off. Well, if you turn it off, you'll never hear my darksy crack. I'm going to feel at the end of this episode. I've got a very dark secret, and I'm going to tell everyone what it is right here.
Is it one about? Yeah, it's about that. Yeah. Dead TV nature-ist.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Bellamy. Yeah, I've got Bellamy foreskin. You can't even tell them all about my condition.
Bellamy's foreskin. Listen, I'll put it up to the microphone. I'm going to turn my back. Agree.
That's an old-time fibage coming out the tip of my cock. Old-time fibage doesn't exist in the universe anymore. Does he not? I can't remember.
He's been Bellamy foreskin. David Bellamy. Bellamy. David Bellenzy foreskin.
And that's going into the cold open. Hello, welcome to the G-Show. Hello, everybody. Press the fucking credit.
Sources and words, phrases, two things I've been possible for. Chubby Bora. It's a poison-shotted G-Show. Yes, that's right.
It's a cheap show time again. I'm the Ice Over there. Hello, I'm over here. And we do a podcast.
In this podcast, as you may have gathered, it's called Cheap Show. And it's one of those funny podcasts with us niche little topic that we like to delve into weekly where we go to bargain bins charity shops powerlands of this country. It's a fucking podcast. And we bring back some of the more interesting curios we find amongst the trash.
That's right. Well, sometimes we do food, sometimes we do drink, sometimes we do board game, sometimes we do book, sometimes we do toy, sometimes we do gadget, sometimes we do clothes, sometimes we do film, sometimes we do this, sometimes we do that. We sometimes do things, very right. And under the banner of keeping it cheap and cheerful.
Now, talking of cheap stuff, I got some free toys the other day. Did you? Walking up by hand in town in Vyron's. Right.
And someone had discarded a box of toys. Was it on a wall, like saying, take it from here? Well, it was just all, like, for charity written on the side. And nothing was just on the pavement, cardboard box.
When you peered inside. I didn't actually notice myself. I'm tired. For the toys.
What kind? All sorts. But pretty high quality. And I picked three items for myself.
Right. I got a Luigi. Oh, nice. With a stand.
Are there ambos? Are there ambos? And it seems like the arm's carp-weeling arms on it. Oh, is it maybe a happy mil toy on the movie?
Like a movie designed Luigi? It could be. It's quite nice build. All right.
Well, you can show me a bit later. And I also picked up what turned out to be. I like the interesting look of it. But I looked it up and it turned out to be a Fortnite ghost, which is obviously some kind of thing off Fortnite.
So, I go to only see every two weeks. I don't understand the reference. No, it did the game Fortnite. I don't know it.
And it looks very much as a squid game aesthetic. It's sort of like a white suit with these sort of tech goggle bits. OK, fine. And like a sort of weird variant of a stormtrooper.
Right. I don't know it. The most important thing was this toy I found in there, which is like a monkey riding a log with wheels. Monkey on a log with wheels.
Yes. What was that from? It's this series of toys. It was quite rare, actually.
And they came with, they're sort of a little bit bigger than a matchbox car. And it's got wheels. So it is a sort of car thing. But they came with baseball cards, apparently.
The original toys. Well, what an interesting aside. And that's just another example on Cheep Show of fun things we find. Oh, did you see my my, my, well, Tiki Tumbler.
Yeah, you show me Tiki Tumbler. Oh, I'm just trying to think of things. You show me your cheeky, cheeky, Tumbler. No, not that one.
Oh, dear. And then other thing you'll learn, dear, new listeners to show. We do like a new endo, don't we? We love it and in you endo in us and out of us.
And I've got a big one. Oh, I've got a fucking huge innuendo. I've got a fat cock. Oh, there you go.
Now you've said that. You've done it. It's just, you've gone past innuendo. So I should go back a bit.
You've gone past innuendo into literally Nintendo. Nintendo? Nintendo. No, it's the video game that is very blunt.
Hey, hey, have I done my Shepherd's Delight joke? No, go on. Do Shepherd's Delight joke. I've been working on this for years.
I really wanted to get into my late and stand-up career of 15 years ago. Because everyone knows the expression, yeah? Red Sky at night, Shepherd's Delight. I think you might have done this on the podcast.
I'm going to say it again. It's fine. Red Sky at night, Shepherd's Delight. Pink, bubbly, Fermi's guy at night, Angel Delight.
Yeah, you did say that on the podcast recently. It's coming every week. I'm going to be saying it. Don't do it every week, please.
And now it's time, every week we go. Now it's time for Eli's Angel Delight. Jack, it's like you kind of tell us on the dance floor. So if it's the same story, I'll be with you.
See my Mr. Nosey book. Don't go all distractoid on me right now. Distractoid?
Yeah, I don't... Oh, I am distractoid. You can't do it a robot that. I am distractoid.
What is that over there? It's a gun. While you were saying that, I've shuffled along. Oh, who am I?
Remember we said no more characters and trying dial them back and maybe don't just not willy-nilly throw them into the ear of this podcast. I like the concept. The concept. Eli's face was burst.
I like the concept of distractoid. Oh, look at that. I think it needs workshopping. Not really.
Because I'm the distractoid. No, the distractoid. Oh, would you like to know a factoid? I haven't got one.
It was just a distractoid. Well, that's not really a distraction, is it? That's more of a kind of just a liar. He's a lie bot.
Are you calling distractoid a lie bot? I'm going to politely have to be workedhopped this off recording time. Oh, I'll find out. Oh, look over there.
Oh, thank you. What's coming up on the show today, Paul? Apparently, lots of embarrassment for us both. Apart from that, come on.
So we have the source report where we are going back to the source trough to see what Eli's pulled out. And then we've got, I guess it's not it's Paul's Pleasant Pass Times really. This is a classic Golden Game. It's a Paul's game, isn't it?
Yeah, but I like to differentiate between classic games, like a Cluedo variation or a much love board game or whatever. And then these things, which are kind of 10 of Penny Party games. Yes. OK, so we'll be playing a Paul's Pleasant Pass Time later in the show.
Paul's Pleasant Pass Time. Looking forward to that. And before we go, anything that I do just want to do some little bit of admin if you mention a few weeks. So in October, we'll be doing a live show in South London.
It's part of the Cheerful Earful Podcast Festival. Where you can go see many podcasts do live versions of this show. And we are doing ours on this date. The 19th of October, it's a Saturday.
It starts at one o'clock at the Bedford-Puppa Ballom, London, southwest 12. And we're doing a 90 minute comedy show that afternoon. And we'll do a meeting with afterwards. Don't you worry about that?
Could you worry about a few people asking if that's going to be a possible thing? And you can get your tickets on the Cheerful Earful website. They're all links on our website, our personal website, the Cheerful Ear Code UK, which is a link. But it's also there as cheerful.co.uk.
Paul, I need to give people a warning because I, last year I ended up going to the wrong podcast festival. Right. Instead of the Cheerful Earful, I went to the Fearful Earful. And it was a terrible racket.
Right. OK, you want to workshop that off? Or do you want to do the fucking Angel of the Light Gag? Fearful, fearful, fearful, evil.
You've got to gag for you. You've got to gag. You don't, though. You've demonstrated.
You don't. Red Sky at night, Angel Delight. No. That's not what it is.
Red Sky at night, Shepherd's Delight. Red Sky in the East, I'll have a bean feast. That's just a rhyme. That's not a joke.
I've just thought of one. I've just thought of one. Here we go. And for the night night, Shepherd's Delight.
Lumpy Brown Sky with gravy. Yeah, that's just saying. The gravy is mashed potato. All right.
Well, that's like Red Sky at night, Shepherd's Delight. Human being, we were only sheep and a dog. Shepherd. It's just, you know, that's the best one, everyone.
Is that just the best one? Shepherd. Isn't it weird how Shepherd you say Shepherd? You don't look at those shep, do you?
Oh, God, I don't know. Well, that's a sheep herd. Isn't it? Why don't you call them a sheep herd?
You know what, goat herd? You guys do a good herd, do you? You say hello, good herd? Good herd, good herd.
No, I fucking lambs out of sheep. Shep her, get her out of the field. I've put her up to turn. The goat herder.
Well, you guys do the goat herder. Hello. Shepherd. Red Sky at night, Shepherd Delight.
Brown Sky at night, Shepherd's for the shite. LAUGHTER I can't believe how much mileage we haven't got out of this. I know. Right.
It's weird that we've made nothing out of not much in the first place and still continue to do something. We are two men with degrees. My mum is in English. Red Sky at night, Shepherd Delight.
Red Sky at day, Shepherd's way. He's got a big knob on. LAUGHTER Let's just start the show, I think. Let's do the shot.
I've just imagined that Sky is redger than day because the fucking huge size of his big pink helmet. With the light back into the sky. The fracking, the sunlight of it making a fucking pink hue. Yeah!
Giant Shepherd knob, block son. LAUGHTER Whatever that means. Let's get on to it. OK, let's get serious now, Paul.
We've all had a little laugh, but Cheep Show has a long-standing, very important tradition of covering sources. And that segment of the show is the source report, and I'd like to welcome Old Listner's Noo to this source report special segment today. Paul, have you got anything to say? Well, the source report is something that we find a service more than a segment, really.
We're here to keep you up to date with the sources out there that you may wish to splash upon your meat. Or on your veg? Yes. Or...
Just stick up your ass. Ooh, you know those soldiers who die from having a bottle of Vodka Shout out there, ask. Yeah. Wonder what that happens with source?
No. Anyway, I've gone to the supermarket. My intention to die, Paul, was to find some of that. LAUGHTER He's a idol wandering.
Red Sky at night, Shepherd Delight. Dead soldier in the morning. Saw her out in the morning. Sailing this morning.
Sailing this morning. I had to say this morning like that. Stop. Stop.
This... This in-name bullshit cannot invade... You've started this! Invade the source report.
It's very serious. I had a mission in mind today when I went to Sainsbury's. I wanted to locate for the purposes of this segment and the wider knowledge of the world, the Noo Hines pickle-flavored... Ketchup.
That'll be like one out of his way to go and try and find it in one of the bigger supermarkets in the area and yet no dice. And now, I know a lot of people have been showing pictures on Twitter to us of this. And can I just make an appeal to our listeners? If you do see a bottle, we would love for you to send that to the PO Box.
So obviously, maybe give us an advance notice so we can say, yes, send it, otherwise my PO Box would be full of pickle sauce. I mean, you'll be having... I haven't seen it. Maybe it's different parts of the country outside London that are getting it.
I don't know. I would have thought it would have been... ..that had every single touch of Hines Ketchup in there. Now that you say that particular sentence, it does draw my attention to another tweet we got, where Hines have released this thing called the Everything Source.
Have you seen this? It's a new promotion. And it says apparently it's made up of like 14 different flavors of their Hines variety sources. And you have to enter a prize drawer right?
I entered it, by the way. So there's a possibility we could get hold of it as well. It's like it says a quiz, but really all it says is, do you like sources? Yeah.
I'm going to make a day. Lie, lie, lie, lie, all the sources. I'll have loads of sources. Now, here's my question.
When you have an Everything Source, which is Ketchup and Garlic Mayo and Burger Sauce and Barbecue, all these different flavors, what could it possibly taste like? It can't taste anything, right? No. I'd say it probably will taste like a more barbecue-y ketchup.
It's just maybe with some chili heat, so it'll be very similar to a sort of brown. You know what? I think it is. In all honesty.
It's just going to be Mayo, a boring Mayo, and that's the joke. I don't think they'd go for that. I think with the flavor technology going on today, you've got Fanta giving us mystery flavors. You would have to be really one kind.
It's all of that kind of thing. And it's because of leaps and bounds that these companies have been making in flavor technology in recent years. This is what we've been doing for a few years. We've been doing a full-time curing diseases, though.
Well, we can't cure your kit of cancer, but have you ever tried snosbury sauce? Snosbury, that sounds good. It tastes like snosberries. You've just nicked it and made it not as fun.
No, I purposely mentioned it as a one-care thing, because that's the point I was making. I want to obviously roll-doll as well. And also, in the filming, the meal thing, where you put a gum in, and it goes from roast dinner, or now it's ice cream. And it's like, we're almost getting to that point, aren't we?
But then the sauce would have to have that profile, from turn, it's beefy, the back end, it's mayo. That was the bit that really stood out to me and made me really full of wonder, childlike wonder, where the gum that changes flavor into do all the different meals. I love that. But Paul, yes, it's obviously just a gimmick, this Heinz thing.
But I would be surprised if they would try and rug pull us by just making it mayo. I don't think I'll do that. I think it won't be, you know, you won't be able to distinguish all 14 of the things in any. No, no one could.
Even a super-tater. I've also emailed Heinz and said, give us some, I doubt we'll hear back. But they don't know where the pros are. I'm not going to be a little bit more careful about it.
I'm not going to be a super-tater. Paul, I've also emailed Heinz and said, give us some, I doubt we'll hear back. But they don't know where the predominant sauce podcast is. I know they don't.
They don't. They don't. Probably. Now, you've got three sauces.
So I had to get replacement sauces, we didn't get the sauce I wanted. That's the main thing, Paul. So shall I introduce the sauces? Please, just have a little break.
And then we'll take them. So the first one that caught my eye, just because of sauce trends, they did have the new, what occurred to me. There's lots of different burger sauces now available. We could do a lot of brand off.
Yeah, we could. Yeah. I'd be interested to do that. But they also have saucy sauce, which is mayo ketchup.
So I thought that's what burger was. What's that rose-a sauce where they called it with ketchup and a- Mero rose. Yeah, Mero rose. But that's just what the saucy sauce is.
It's a lot of fuzzy nomenclature in the world of sauces. Great album by I already had that. Fuzzy nomenclature. Yeah.
Or besides though, is it? Now, but the first one that caught my eyes was this Hellman's cheese flavour sauce, because cheese sauce or American style sauce. For a long time in this country, there's been sort of cultural stuffiness about it, like a sort of particularly on nows up, almost, to say that's not real food, that's that American plastic food. You know, well, it's because America had that whole trend of squirty, squirty cheese or that kind of stuff.
But this is essentially the same stuff, isn't it? Surely. But in recent years, that kind of American cheese sauce has been much more accepted into, I'd say, British cuisine culture. And it's because of the whole barbecue craze of the Americanization of sauces, really, when you think about it.
But you know what I'm saying? And so that's why this caught my eye. It's Hellman's cheese flavour sauce. Now you said, oh, because it's Hellman's, is it just going to be a cheesy flavoured mayonnaise?
And I said, no, no, no. You put me in my place. Because Hellmans don't just make mayonnaise. In fact, they make ketchup, don't they?
They try and compete with mayonnaise with a cake. I don't know if they can't say that. And I believe you. But I can't make mayo and Hellmans make ketchup.
They're just at each other a whole time. It's a small. I just don't remember going into a supermarket and seeing Hellmans get you on a shelf. I thought, yeah, I've seen it.
So is it just a cheese sauce, then? Let's have a little look what it says. It doesn't say anything. It's just a cheese sauce.
It's just a cheese flavour sauce. It doesn't say cheese flavour sauce. It doesn't say cheese flavour mayo. Which is the thing.
A cheese flavoured sauce is just cheese sauce. Otherwise, you're saying a sauce has some inherent flavour. I think the cheese variants on that. I think the flavour word in there is trying to get away with it not actually officially beefing any cheese.
It's like chocolate flavoured sauce. How's it got? Any real chocolate in there? Right.
I think there's a certain level maybe in the chocolate case of cocoa powder. And if you haven't got enough cocoa powder in your product, you can't actually call it chocolate. Maybe there's something. What's going on with it?
Almost anything. Burger? Yes. Hot dog.
Yes. Chips. Yes. Rose potatoes.
Absolutely. Fish. Yes. Cabbage.
Egg. Egg and cheese. A ball deck with that squirted on. And it says mixed by Ed and Ted.
Extra tingly sauce. What's that? What's that? What's tingly?
Is it hot sauce? Is it hot sauce? That's why I thought it's this one kind of numbing pepper in it. Because that's a tingle.
You know like sesh one numbing pepper is a tingle rather than a heat. But no, it's just hot sauce. And I looked at the side and I said, who's Ted? I will read you the copy, okay?
Yeah, okay. Because I was going to say I'm looking at the website. It's fucking annoying as cock. Who's Ted?
He's Ed Sheer and Sidekick. Oh. A Ted he with a taste for hot sauce and a craving for adventure. Together they made a mix for all.
It's loud. Then it brings a tingle to everything from Brecky to late night nuggets. Can fuck right off. Listen to the website version of that.
This is on tinglytead.fuckingdodge website.whatever. It says Ted who? Way back yonder Teddie was Ed's childhood nickname. After leaving his poor prince on a couple of Ed's records today, Ted has been born again as grumpy per sidekick and co-creator of the first tingly sauce known to man.
What are you talking about? I'm not impressed by your sauce because it's based on Edge Sheer and fucking Teddy. This is just Ed Sheer and going, I've got so much money. Uh, should I start a hot sauce company today?
So my fucking teddy bear. We've got some fucking shitty sauce. We want to put your name on can we do it? Uh stick me teddy bear on though teddy bear goes on everything.
I love my teddy bear. Oh I can't honestly and maybe it's just fucking face. He's so annoying. It looks like someone's in the front of fuzzy bear This is just this is the embodiment of fucking strummy chummy infantile chummy cop.
Yes, and it's sort of stupid celebrity endorsement culture as well So poor what I can't actually recall a single-edged shear and song I mean there's a pretty face this by saying generationally were a bit out of the loop of modern music Secondly his music is not for us anyway, and also finally I don't care But wasn't it one call like all of me and how did it go? Oh me? Oh, yeah So food for nicking them the same chords as Marvin Gaye's yeah But I'm kind of on edge here inside with that to be fair because like as he says, you know, it's three chords It's sort of a thing. Yeah, but we'll be trying that pool now and only have an extra tingly sauce as well I got is the extra tingly all right, okay, so they only got two types It doesn't actually say what their sources it's a hot sauce.
There's a recipe here Oh, just like it you get out to garlic bread or steaks. Oh my god or tacos or anything Avocado anything you're right. There's a recipe add it to your thing. Yeah, it's a fucking sauce.
It's for accompanying food stuff It's just weird. I was actually say what the source is you know, I mean they call it the ketchup of hot sauces No, they do not it says a lifelong ketchup and hot sauce obsessive edgy I've long fucked off had a dream to make the ketchup of hot sources. You know what? That's known as lying.
No, you're probably ketchup of what sources is known as ed Yeah, it's a ratchet. Oh, yes, or atro. Oh, that's what it is. Yeah, he's stepping in the sriracha pool, isn't he?
Just a ratchet jacuzzi I was gonna say shakuzzi Shrekuzzi Right Jack jack off into the koozy Well, I jack it's very easy. Oh, mate. Imagine you were like new to like America and they said oh getting the jacuzzi You were like, oh, do I jack off into it and then you do? Oh Paul's left some jacuzzi Right and the third source yeah the third that we have today caught my eye and I don't think we've tasted anything like this But you know there was a new category before I tell you what this is there is a new category out there Which is really coming through to this part of the world and that is avocado source and I do not mean guacamole Which is a thick avocado dip.
No, I know I mean a source avocado salsa. They sometimes call it. Okay. I give it a nice Yeah, I want to try it.
I've tried one that was very nice, but they had an avocado hot sauce there as well It's obviously an avocado salsa probably with some extra heating but this is another green sauce green sauce green sauce is green sauce Boozy jack this is made by del primo and it's south of their day or green sauce And I believe this is a Mexican style green tomato style sauce I was trying to play the profile with that mean then like a lighter hot sauce Green tomato has a sour almost citrus bite right and it's sort of bitterness a pleasant bitterness. Yes, so I think it's gonna have a fresh Fresh almost right like you say yeah brighter than a red sauce. Oh well three interesting sources I wonder which one will come out tops and which one will be in the dingley del of that nasty town well Which one should we start with should we do it the order that I've said but the cheese might buy all the works I think you see I'm gonna get the cheese out the way you guys right She's out the way I'll have to clean the sources the cheesy helmet help cheesy helmets helmet sauce Change it with cheesy helmet sauce nice. I like this.
I just think No, this smells like a very slight shade of myth. Yeah, but it's also smells like I catch up a little bit Yeah, it's got a daddy sauce catch up off to it You see what I'm getting a sort of sourness the sort of that sort of lactose sourness getting that the back end But the front end really quite tart like a catch up tart. That's it. I'll just try to say okay, so I'm not gonna get into this I'm not gonna get into this sour.
Yes, I was sharp everything That's when I say sour cheesy sour. I think that's what you're picking up on it's like a lactose milk solid sort of sourness So milky salmon to me it just kind of smells like a cheesy catch up. I guess I'll let you administer yourself here Paul I always have to now you guys applying the cheesy sauce to our spoons There's a heat for you. That's a lot of stuff away too much sauce.
That is fine. It's cheesy. You like cheese You like to have all looks into clean the spoon. Yeah, that's a lot of cheese.
It's all right. What if I don't like it You'll be fine Paul. Why are you so scared of this cheese sauce man? Don't know it's just taste it It's fine.
It's got that same color as craft macaroni cheese. It does. I love it and it's got a nice texture It is not the mayo texture is I mean look at that I can do the upside down. It's coming off Oh, don't don't drop your cheesy sauce and we can invert these spoons fully Yeah, like maverick at the end of fucking top down where he goes cut over he flies over three two one down he goes Sweet oh god.
That has the same consistency. It's come. Yeah, it's mayo consistency. We need to find a dip We need to start bringing the dip along to this because I just don't I'm going to the point now where I don't like shoveling in Large amounts of sauce into my mouth.
Oh, I've got pretzel. Yeah, we should have a pretzel or something or a pretzel It's too late for that. We're all in let's go for you. That's not as nice as I thought it was gonna be No, it also wasn't as flavorful as the smell.
No less cheesy than I want it to be. It's quite sweet. It's quite tart And not salty enough for me. No, it's not tart at all.
I said that you don't know. I didn't I do I remember things You don't I do and I also why did then if you're gonna bring the dogs up? I didn't bring the dogs up. Yes, that's why you keep saying you'll go remembering things Do you like forget things like that big sheet for the one time eight years ago?
I'm still saying I know you're still you can't forget that Fucking forget that it was the one thing in the whole of that adventure I asked you to do the one thing the only one thing I can't believe you bring it up again. I'm having more of the sauce Well, could have more of a company this sauce Let's go on to the next one then. Okay, what we doing? It's not too bad.
It's a bit sweeter. I can see that working with it's very Yeah, you'd have the hot dog with some yeah, you could you could stomach that with it with a hot dog Yeah, I mean as a say, it's not really 3.5 out of 5 It's not really fair to judge this when you're just dumping it on a spoon and then putting it in your gobble right now It was squirty Ted or whatever. It's Ed squirty Ted she runs complete like he did fuck all he turned up and said My big raggedy face and I'll fucking say it might Eddie bear made it. Why does he get to be like the arch sort of catalyst?
No, it's because it's like all celebrities these days They can't just be known to sing they have to have perfume and a clothesline and a sauce always faces got all muffled I'm off. I'll have a snap off of the month. It's not good There's a real bitterness coming in through on the nose for me there a floral bitterness like yeah like like parmaviolis No like surface cleaner like for yeah, yeah like an artificial floweriness. Yeah like stomach bar when you've been sitting a bitterness Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's not it's not a great smelling source.
Is it? Oh, this could be even worse But then it could be one of these situations where it's like smell bad taste good. It could be because the cheese was like smell good taste It was a bit meh the flavor. Yeah, yeah of the cheese, but and I know we want to hate this source a bit But that isn't a good smell.
No, right? I would like to know generally how much input edgy we had into the flavor profile of this I mean does he really care? I reckon he stole it from another source company changed it a little bit Yeah, I had a big hit there he squirted someone to his spoon and I'm gonna It comes out quite vigorously. So, you know, I watch out.
See what I mean. It's quite runny. It's more runny than the cheese sauce That's for sure. It's about the consistency of sriracha.
It actually smells like a knock-off ketchup like a kind of lower than low greasy food Really unpleasant that thing that you identified which I call a sort of bitter floral florality, but you're saying lemony almost Like an artificial lemon tan isn't it right? Well here it goes down the teeth and pass the gums look out. Tell me here It comes to vinegary. It's awful.
It's just vinegar. Yes. It's very tart very sharp very vinegary, but then there's a little bit of tingle There's some heat there it leaves a tingle, but it's not a nice flavor considering how dark that is in terms of its color Red it's kind of like a really fiery red color the flavor suggests to me weirdly like it almost is like a green sauce Yeah, it's that weird. It's that you know what I mean about the weird palm of violet tea sort of that's there on the tongue as well As well as the nose, isn't it?
It's not very good. It's too vinegary. It's just a vinegary sauce to vinegary And there's an unpleasant bitterness underneath it. I think we can say can't we like this podcast?
Let's go on to the final one the del primo green salsa or whatever you said it was Um, can I have a mark for the cheese and yeah? I haven't so the cheese not for me to add five but maybe in context of the burger in Michael Perpoint that one the edge here in 1.5. It's a really vinegary mess with a little bit He's look for the price which is frequent. I think that is you can you can do much better for frequent You really could you really could like I'm gonna pop my head, but I'm pretty sure yeah That's not nice and it feels and it had a little lumpy bits in as well.
They consistency wasn't great Bitty bitty bitty a bit gritty in fact. Yeah, so not great consistency either. They're running in bitty. Yeah, which is not good No running a bit you also name with a Russian cartoon series.
That's it. That's the gag Yeah, I think this is a famous traditional green sauce. Come on nice glass bottle. This is a nice chunky bottle You're my kind of man's you like oh, that's a lovely.
Oh, man. Oh, yeah, it's like a snapple bottle Yeah, I just think that's easily the nicest smelling source of the three. Oh, it's quite delicate, but it's very grassy It's very very grassy not vinegary grassy. No, it's a bright Andre grassy.
I guess Andre the grassy Yeah, it's gonna be the most watery no quite thick actually certainly no runny other than the other one But there's smell is like it's so much more nuanced. It's lighter It's more vegetables and I mean us to it as well an umami sort of sweetness to that that odour. No, I'm getting a salary thing from this Yeah, it sounds a bit. Yeah, it's also actually is salsa.
Oh, I'm gonna go sauce anyway. Slap it down me go. Oh, mm That's subtle. It's not too flavorful.
Well, like a Dorito. Oh, I think that's really nice. It's got a yeah It's the milder. It's much milder than the edge.
It's not show offy. It's kind of it's a compliment there is something there But it has a quite a nice mouth feel it's kind of nice coatie, you know, it's a lot more watery than I expected It is that's what I'm trying to tell you it's the thinnest but you have that on an egg I'll be lovely on eggs eggs and cheese eggs and beans put it some beans I don't have anything. Well, I was just thinking you could pour over some pot tortilla chips and stuff Yeah, as a part of a natural. Yeah, she's a natural.
Yeah, I'm not with that cheesy flavour sauce helmet I mean I'd go for that you're a beast now. What would you say for the del primo green sauce 3.5? It's all your favourite of the three there. Yeah, but it's remarkable.
But it's fine. It's a whole category I think that's just a decent yeah, south of Verde and I again I liked it I mean I like that 4.25. I'm only 3.5 now to conclude we really want to get hold of some that pickle flavour to Heinz ketchup Well, some lovely sauce and you know that of course it's out of a day. That's a south of Verde We also want to get some of that Heinz everything sauce.
Yeah, well, we have famously we have tried on this segment before Paul the all purposes Source didn't get that Indonesian all-purpose source get that and I'm using that for now lube well that as well But I'm also using it to chapstick to write CVs you writing your CVs in that sort with no with the source It's all purpose it does everything. Oh, that's good. I use it to run my car. It's all purpose Yeah, I actually I drive it around.
Yeah, you know what I give it to see mammals because they're all purpose purpose Eli like a dolphin perhaps Poepers yeah Anyway, it's all really good. It's all really good. It's all really good. It's all good.
You know, it's a it's all poor It's all porous. Yeah, you know what I'm saying? I always fucking head phones have come off you so angry What you angry it's getting dark in here get dark in here right? Let's move on to the part of the show that involves a little laugh because this is all bollocks in it later.
No, no, I ask you What podcast needs a source report? No podcast doors. It's a waste of time. It is not it Eli.
Let's admit It was a waste of time. I'm interested in bringing source information to the masses Paul I don't care what you say. It's a it's a stalwart. It's a pillar of his podcast It's a foundational pillar of the podcast supporting all the wins see all the dreams the dreams of our listeners the shared dreams Of us and our listeners moving forward.
Here's what I think moving forward into the land sliding through the land here's what I think I'm sourcing hand squirting squirt it, squirt it under my armpits. Oh, you see now he's got nothing to say to the crutch she's a nothing now. It's a ramble, I'm gonna have an outdoor naked sauce bath mad ramble now Yeah, here we go. She's a cheesy cheese at jesus.
Here we go. I'm at this red sky night No, no, no, no, no, no. Would you please the... No.
No, no, no, no. That's against Golden Games segments. I will allow that madness for that segments, but this is Paul's Pleasureuffest times. Paul's Pleasureuffest times?
Paul's Pleasureuffest times Are a gentler experience, no? No. It's Paul's past times more like this. Ready, tinkle, tinkle, tinkle, tinkle, Paul's Pleasureuffest times, tinkle, tinkle, tinkle, tinkle, tinkle.
That kind of thing, is that vibe, innit? I'll go for it, then I'm gonna get survive. this is gonna fucking go we all know it's a tired joke no Paul I'm really serious no I know I've taken a book no you know you're being serious no I trust you mate yeah yeah I have taken on board exactly what you said and I really want I want you to enjoy this Paul okay yeah go on I'm gonna put my full faith in trust in you yeah go on so I've taken a ball what you're gonna say and I'll just do another this isn't fine or this is the final watch to a fucking poor destination you ready I sadly am yeah I know good no good good good good content ruin this is a segment of the show we play some pleasant past times it's a game a game of some sort which can be called a past time yeah but it's not I don't understand don't be belligerent for no reason say the belligerents for when it matters or live head and tree I think you'll find same difference I want you to just dampen it and he'd do that in it dampen my order yes I need you to dampen it put it in it would be saving it for later yeah maybe save it for a moment ever come back no you know what pisses me off Paul now on the subject is what I'm saying everything to us you say put up in in it I put up in in you I will bash a big way again right in your unworthy meters but then that wouldn't actually hurt because it would be right do you want to try it I have would you like I'm no scissors don't remember how about I take a safety pin and I bend it out from the catch straightening from the catch the catch at the top of the safety pin what's the safety pin the safety oh my god straight out that's nice oh that's nice oh that's nice oh everyone wants to hear that don't they you can stand my dick with a pin are you know you're taking into consideration I say what you said I'm filtering out let me do it again all right let me see where's going so I'm gonna straighten the pin I'm gonna put it in your fucking meters oh what game are we playing on the fucking polls pleasing pastimes this is a game I saw in the chat around the corner from you actually that one I had this out there for a while that one this is my voice foundation yes with an extremely high funk content to a lot of fun content there and it's called snake oil by company called out of the box and it's apparently got a little thing in the corner what you call that again what's that called a little rose out or whatever yeah I think it is it's a pendant it's not pendant yeah this is more of a casting yeah I heard that word out loud no one else I like it you could put a rosette right over your bum I'll give you yeah you could and it'd be like saying best British allow something I don't know yeah it would be best British land yeah anyway it says on the same sky at night shepherds pie shepherds but I I shepherds by at night bum curry coming out all day there's nothing what's called snake oil says the best party game in the world on the rosette who said that rosette but it's playing on the theme of snake oil isn't it because snake oil oh you know what you know they you see there it's matter in it almost yeah that's what they're doing but snake oil obviously is a by word for a fake a medicine that has no redeeming quality there has no efficiency in being a medicine but is trumped up to have all sorts of properties yeah it has like all the cure your arthritis or your headaches or help with your spine or everything I just you everything when actually it's just probably melodica it's about keep maintaining word isn't it that's how they sell so much crap to men over the years I called snake oil for your snake no it's because in the 1800 in America you had people actually selling snake oil and saying it would do all sorts of stuff that came from all the oil of a snake and this oil would make your glands work yeah because they've got basically you think about it they're sort of out there in America and there's all sorts of snakes and stuff they just stick it in a cauldron yeah boil it down stick it in some bottles and then off the back of old one old tiny wang or by my snake oil yeah I love that though I like that like stereotype of the snake or salesman in like American history the ghost it's it's all Gabby you know ladies and young I take a lot of identifying supervising a magnifying that's post known to man hoxeter yeah hoxeterism made from 1717 special in ancient Indian spices from the white man who was with it would be nice 70 different snakes just saying and Pontinnaian I'm 17 I could Alan the snake David snake Bill's snake he is a lizard with no he told me he's a snake yeah Bill snake came around here didn't tell me well Bill Snakes let's keep it on the wrong when I don't say he's brave pop round I can't believe the disrespect from him he's been right at my bar anyway Greg snake there's also Greg Dan Colin you can't think of 17 men's names didn't say they're all male snakes right how many we got Karen you got some name names you can't name names Billy snake you said that already Bill call snake you're getting personal name snake Neil snake we just say over and over I'm doing this actually Eli snake yeah Paul snake Ian snake Karen snake Barbara snake Valerie snake Patricia snake Tina snake Janet snake anyway let's play the game that was so enjoyable I will say that's a bottle of the snake Janet snake Cassandra snake okay all right oh does they hit a national competition winner mensa select okay let's explain the rules very cool it's a card game and it's similar to card games we've done in the past it falls into the same world is like you know cards against humanity is that kind of logic can I just say one thing here Paul yes you say card game but I think technically it's more of a sort of parlour game that you just caught the information you see I'm saying like card game is one I'm basically saying yeah it's a card based game it's based on cards but it's a part of game or it's a game of wit yes of and who could be the wittiest yeah it's also objective fun so the idea is there's a pile of cards here I see the sessions on like bouncer it says there actually those gangster cowboy etc right and you will for the first round for example pick a card from random and that would be you you're that customer right meanwhile I will deal myself six of these other green cards okay and these cards they just have things like crowd barely kit the horn there's words just words yeah and the idea is when you come in as your character I have to sell you something made of two cards I pulled from my hand of six okay right and then basically I do something funny and then you say it wasn't and then it's your turn again we can't play properly because it's only you meant to have three you could have to play with three minimum yeah but let's just see let's just use as a comedy improvisational exercise right so I'm bored it's a springboard to greater comedy possibilities well all right if all worst comes to work I can bring back a distractoid and he could turn and I've got Bob Snake and Janet Snake falling down it's snake really lovely neighbors next door Ember Dink Snake no how dare you say in the UK snake yeah Rico Snake mmm Lebamba I don't know what's up let's just start this game I'd love to so Eli is now shuffling the professional cards and I should we should mention these have their double-sided so they've got professions on the green side yeah they're not professions really but job titles or characteristics or archetypes maybe they're here couch potato that's not a job unless you're a youtuber I mean you do but very related couch potatoes and beach bumps yeah we took a couch potato dropped him out of the couch onto the beach you'd be a beach bum and then he could take it back with a big crane you have to take the roof off the house but you could yes no I'm back down on the couch yeah or you stick a potato boat beach bum come yeah why just read and fruit just go up arses all the time because me because it's what I like oh baby that's a while I look okay that's definitely a pineapple shuffle shuffle it until he likes her stop I'm a secret admirer and now you've got to pick two cards out of it to create an item to sell to me as a secret admirer when you pick the two cards put the other four down you got those two cards I do right in that case let's begin our little vignette for you now roll up roll up it's Eli the wilde bus and my special products I'm the world's greatest inventor I've invented my way out of the paper bag it was called the paper bag repair Eli the wilde bus come on come on come down oh sonny Jim are you in the are you in the market for a innovative invention oh yeah no you speak all the English to my friend a little bit of this little bit of war it never before I get to see you I can you speak in English a ton I just a little bit just a little bit nervous I've got just a thing for you oh do you oh do you oh oh I've liked you for quite some time I've admired your your sources and oils I like your special ingredients I've always wanted oh yeah that was miles away in Hicksville Ohio I've come all this way and to see you really interesting now buy anything I've got a fish brush oh yeah you got a fish brush yeah what does it do brush fish with it well I don't have any fish scales them yeah yeah you get a fish you think I like to eat that you can hang it up I've gone right off you right she just looked fatter in real life though yeah oh that's not very nice you stink all the fish are closing hanging off yeah you know what's wrong with your heart why is your horse half dead I've been shagging it now if you're is that the best to come up with Mr. Silverman this game sucks right I've said it what are you gonna do I don't understand means to try and get something to appeal to a secret in this guy one else here is just you to appeal to him with a fish brush how this game sucks I don't understand what I'm trying to do you've been a secret admirer and then I'll pick two cards for my hand then we'll do it that way okay two cards I'll come in okay I got this hello hello I'm Adam as T.
Nickelbacker and I am here with my one the poor Ian with ointment scenarios oh welcome in sir welcome into my wonderful shop sir how can I help you sir I'm looking for a certain special somebody oh you now sir I can help you out there I'm here here around you I might be persuaded to make a purchase for somebody if I'm while I wait for that certain special somewhere I'd be in the room right now well sir I think I've got something for you that will just be pure interest I guess something's peaking let me show you there sir it is a peaking out my fly it is a dancing puppet said am I not it's a dancing puppet at the end of my know and it's a puppet in the shape of my good self-automist team and you just press this little but it's back and it's a bit you ever let me UN see sir I take it you go well it's taking me home with you right with flip the cards open now laughter not blue it is green wood green start and here we go I let you pick it again so internally of advising for giving six cards six new cards to each other now so we've got 16 I can we do me down to itself they need to know all the fucking minute shape what we do behind the slides I I know but you make it more complicated than I do so. I don't make it more intimate. I make it sound more intimate and loving. You know what I mean?
I'm trying to afford you. Are you ready to stop having a forge of bond with you? Weird guy. Now, are you ready to tell me to stop?
Stop. Right. What's on the top? What have you got?
Clown. Oh, you enter clown school, sir. Right. OK.
So you're going to clown come into my shop and I'm going to pick two items here. Oh, what's this? OK. OK.
Here we go. Here we go, sir. It's going to open up my shop. Artemis, TP, Rick, Nickelbackers, one deporium.
Here we go. I want to call my first costume. Oh, be you. Go.
You look like a clown, sir, with your big nose and your buddy here. Where is my button? Go. Well, sir.