So he's outside. Yes, he's outside. He's a little bit shaken up from his experience, but he is outside. He said he's ready to do a podcast.
Okay, that's great news and thanks Gareth. Thank you for bringing him over. I know, you know, you took some time out of your schedule. I do a YouTube channel now.
I do as well. Yeah, I do. But I thought this was an interesting case of possession that I thought I'd give it a go. You see, so we had to go through a very elaborate exorcism process.
I was gonna ask, how did you actually get draw the demon? Well, it was a very, very vicious class seven demon. Very horrible thing. He was, he terrorized me.
He broke my window, went out. No, he didn't. It was something there. It was, there was something there.
And it was, oh, so anyway, what happened is this? I tell him down on the altissi, lying down. Well, how did you find him firstly? Oh, he basically we found him in a bush in the zoo just outside the pig pens in the zoo.
Like, American, my own, just like that. Yes. So he wasn't pig pens. It was something else.
It was the wolf pen. That's what it is. You found him in the wolf pen in London, Zoo. Right.
He was naked. Yeah, he sensed to go back there. He was naked and she fidded. And so I managed to back him up and drag him back to my altar where I put him down.
Is that in your way you live? Yes, I have a little outdoor, like a shed, little shed in the little stone altar and you see, don't make me the other voice for too long. It's all I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
Anyway, I put him on the altar. Naked is the day he was born. Listen, I put him on the altar. Yes.
Naked is the day he was born. And then I had to get me really out. Didn't I? Nice little fungal tip.
We got his nose. We got a wolf. No, this was going in. Because I knew it was a terrible possession.
I had to get the gunk up for a few days beforehand. A real cheesy, boldly kind of, you know, like, okay, that's how you did it then. Please send him in. My tip of my cock.
Like cheese. It did. Like that blue cheesy get. All right.
Gareth, anyway, I squeezed it onto the tip of his nose and went come out evil demon and the demon don't like the smell of my cheesy cock. He doesn't. So he goes, oh, wait a minute. And he off he went back to the Delvesant Demons in the netherworld.
And since then, Paul's been recuperating him recuperating. He has very good Gareth, very good work. And please, if you could just, I don't think we have to do the podcast. Yeah, no, I'll go out on the way.
I'll bring him in. All right. Just I might just sort of say, you want to open a window? Is it still remnants of my exorcism?
All right. I'm off. Let me bring it in now. I'm gone.
Oh, sit down. Oh, all right. Oh, oh, hello, Paul, you're back with us. Yeah.
I'm not going to apologize, first of all, for everything that I did on the possession. It wasn't you. We know it wasn't you, Paul. I know.
You did some terrible things under that demon spell. I don't really want to talk about the killings. Really? No, not the killings.
You didn't think much worse. I know. You went on the Joe Rogan podcast. Shut up.
Three hours. Shut up. I wasn't meant to see it wasn't. You were talking about magic gemstones.
It was fine. It's so Rogan. It's not. And all the political stuff I said, ignore that.
And all the stuff I said about women just ignore it. I was possessed by Calcalf. Oh, was that the name of the demon? Yeah, Calcalf.
Gareth didn't know the name. No, he wouldn't have done it because I had him in me. So I'm just looking at it now. He's 100% gone now.
I think I'm trying to say is this, mate. Right. And you've cleaned your nose just to be clear. Yeah, no, I wiped it.
I'll give you a death of life. It was fine. I mean, I can still smell it. I don't think that smell ever leaves you.
I don't think it's going to haunt me. It was a harm coming off his crotch. I didn't want to be when he left. I didn't want to be like crotch level.
It's very effective. It's a very effective process. It's amazing. I've never seen anything work like that.
Anyway, he did say this. I shouldn't exert myself too much. So as a result, I've only got an hour to give to this. So I just want to give an hour and then get out of it.
So I can do a real time episode, tap out after an hour and then I can go back to bed and recoup right now. All right. Oh, I'll never get rid of that cheesy tip stink. Well, I don't think you needed that extra bit in reference.
They were just like them. Yeah, there's a little bit still there. No, we could stop now. We could stop this bit.
Oh, he's eating it. He's eating Gareth's dried. Dick Muckel. Yeah.
And ladies and gentlemen, it is like a beautiful blue house. No, I'm musical. See you next week on to a cool. I'm going to go into song.
He's thinking you go with this also can't be sampled by noise. Stop. Please, Mr. Silverman is a real time episode.
Absolutely real time as I can fathom. So therefore my levels must be set. My voice must be close to the microphone made to pick up all sounds right. Not just the sound levels of a particular vocal chord or two.
No, on we go. It's cheap show. Welcome to it. How are you doing, Mr.
Silverman? Hadron Bongo Lord. I'm fine, Paul. A little bit tired from the weekends.
You bop it in the church of dance. I did it to Jan Saturday nights. I thought about playing a Halloween for song. Back here.
I do have an even gauge. Loving a haunted house. I think it's cool, which it sounds exactly like thriller. You heard that one?
Yeah, because it's a response song, isn't it? No, not the response song to beat it. Oh, this is just another loving a haunted house. And it literally it's almost it's one of those ones which is really cleverly almost exactly the same but legally different.
I don't know if that won't get sued. Yeah, you know, the build up is the clip of it. Yeah. And then I did.
Oh, I'm not going to play because I'm not editing this. That's right. Should I play a little? No, I don't want to hear it.
This is how it goes. I don't know. I have to wait for you in real time to do a web search. It won't take very long.
You're going to do a little voice thing. Oh, what do I do? Do this? Do it.
Go on. Play. Say play this. That's the other one ever says.
Yeah, go on. Do it. Now we're live. Carry on.
Stop speaking on the clock. If you don't speak, it goes over the front of my voice. Then we have to have silence in a real time. I'll tell you when to be silent.
Okay. Go on. Now. Ah, shit.
Shut up. Shut up. Okay. Shut up.
Laughing a haunted house if on gauge. Play that. Ah, you see, that's the bit I don't get when you do the go get it. I know it works.
I've seen the other thing. It's strange. Go on. Put it on.
This is a loving haunted house. Yeah. Oh, no. We're just the bottom of the top.
Put it that way. Yes. Oh, cool. Yeah.
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. It is. That's brilliant.
Oh, oh, oh. Oh, oh. Because when you're ordered, yeah, it's ordered. Think of organs.
They'll give that galaxy. Watch. It's your lyrics. The idea.
It's close to me. 24 hours shop is still open. I find it interesting how that was one of the well to this day, the biggest selling LP of all history. Yeah.
What take what took over it? What was that? What's now the biggest album? It's still it's even after all these years, even after Blur versus Oasis or even after Lady Gaga.
No one will ever sell that many units again because of the world we live in. If you think about it. Do you think that's true? Yes, because people albums aren't the same thing.
They're not the same cultural kind of moments. Are they? Songs are not packaged as albums these days. As much.
Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on.
Hello everybody. Welcome to Chief Jones. You can't be comedy podcast. I mean, we're four minutes in.
The comedy comedy podcast where Eli and I go for the bargain binge charity shops and budget Poundland style pound shops. Moominland. And bring you the treasure we find amongst the trash. The fun in the fugal is found.
I find the fun in the fugal. You don't. So that's what the overall concept is. Fugal.
Fugal. Fugal is a kind of war thing, isn't it? Fugal war? Fugal war?
Isn't it? Fugal war? Isn't it? Fugal war?
Isn't it? Fugal war? Isn't it? Fugal war?
Isn't it? Fugal war? Isn't there a thing about fugalism? Fugal war?
That's feudalism, isn't it? Yes. Feudal. Hang on.
Hang on. So what's fugal? What's fugal then? There is no fugal.
Oh, he's all. Fugal. Oh, hang on. There is a word called Fugal.
F-U-G-A-L. Meaning. And it says, I'm just going to open it up. I beg her as an urban dictionary.
You're not interested in a normal dictionary. Of or relating to a fugal or composed in the style of a fugue. That's right. That's right.
A musical thing. It's a musical thing. I'll tell you what it is. I'll tell you what it's specifically.
It is different instruments repeating different repetitions, cycle, that builds and it's part of symphony. Right. Let's tell you how it goes. It says it's a polyphonic composition based upon one, two or more themes which are enunciated by several voices or parts in terms subjected to contractual treatments and then gradually, this is just me guessing, built up into a complex form, having to somewhat distinct divisions or stages of development until it marks climax at the end.
However, addendum, there's also a psychiatry term, fugue, which is a fugue. A fugue. A fugue state. I mean a fugue state.
A period during which a person experiences lots of memory often begins a new life and upon recovery remembers nothing of the amnesic phase. Oh, that's those ones. They're really strange stories. I'm really fucking worried one.
If you get your memory back, then you don't remember being Bob for a bit. Oh, fuck me. I'm now Bob. Yeah.
No, I'm now Paul. And those years could be years have gone. Look at my kids. Do you know that was quite interesting looking up the word fugal there?
Yeah. Because we find the fun in the fugal. We do. Because we are quite fugals sometimes.
I were podcasts, broadcasts, Paul. Yeah. They build up themes, repeat, don't they? For one or two, or for more players and we hit the voices.
Oh, no. I'm talking about psychiatrists. I've been talking about that as well. Because we often get amnesia.
No, no, no, no. The fuck we are. No, it's more of a take on that way. It's like, this isn't really all real lives and who we really are.
And when I come out of that, I forget what we've done in this show. And I kind of define myself by not what I am in it or how I make it. Yeah. Therefore, I'm distance from the reality of what we do within the podcast.
I see much more of a mechanical process that I also like the distance myself from. Can I just say one thing in a two word way? Yes. Wealth, fugal.
Wealth, arugal. Here's the richest man in all of arugal. Oh, did he book? Did he book?
Did he book? Did he have? Has he put some entertainment? No.
He has. You know, he's got that alter that you're not meant to say dwarf now, but it's a musical dwarf. Dick Mucals. What do you want to do?
Yes. Of course it's what I want to do. What do you think it's a pro? Just let Dick in for a minute.
He's telling your song and he doesn't have to be a small statue, does he? He's tiny, man. Can't we just go follow that, make him microscopic like he's the size of a thumb? Like he's a thumb size.
Have you seen? I haven't seen Dick. No. I mean, I saw one of the tip of Gareth's or Gareth's on the tip of his.
No, you remember? I said, I guess he'd be the root, wouldn't he? He'd be on top if you think of what his dick cheese as a separate entity. I do.
I mean, it is. It's a very powerful supernatural sorceress. It's evidently superior. Emmetally superior.
Emmetally superior. Oh, mate. We're cooking now. Come on.
It's comfortable cheese-based pop-carts. Quick. Smells it wet. Oh, fucking mess.
You've stunk it up like a rich camembert. Oh, come on. Come on, bear. Come on.
I've got to be bear, Alex. It's got to be come on. Now, fuck it. Danny bear.
Right. Move it on. Remember Danny bear. Oh, come on.
Who's Danny bear? That member? She was at TV present. She was the top lad.
Laddet. She was because she spoke a little bit cheeky. She had a company accent. No, she's one of those ones where it's like she looked all lovely.
But she's one thing. Extra accent. It's like that. I'm hearing towards us.
Go on. It's one. Caffilly, willy. Yeah, that's pretty good, isn't it?
He did wave over my nose. Caffilly. Carefully. Carefully.
Let's taste the mustard. No, no, wait, wait, wait. We haven't got long, we've got. We've got 52 minutes.
We've got plenty of time in the scheme of things, mate. Oh, it's a whisper's far too way. So, thank you to everyone who came to the live show. It was nice to see the whole place packed out.
We hope you enjoyed the show. I think now that this episode comes out the week after it, you can now watch it on YouTube or you can listen to the podcast, whatever it is, it's your fancy. But thank you to everyone. Thank you to Tom as well for helping us for the edit together of that video.
Thank you to Sue's, Ethan. Thanks everybody. Ash and everyone we got together. We had a very good time.
We had a brilliantly positive experience from doing it. So, again, thank you to Giles and everyone at the Giffel Eeful Podcast. First of all, yeah, it looks like we'll be back there next year. Having it.
Can I just say one thing before we go on? Yeah. I've heard of Pecorino, but here's Pecorico. Come on, it's a cheese.
It's a cheese, Paul. Yeah. Pecorino. Okay, fine.
I did not. I thought Pecor. Yeah, but isn't there like a Pecadillo? What isn't that something?
Pecadillo is like a king or something like a certain thing you like. A liking for. He has a certain Pecadillo for ladies of a certain height. Pecadillo is also a naughty pigeon.
It's a little bird that rolls up or a tiny dildo. Let's move on. I don't want to do anything. Well, we got back in half an hour to do everything now.
We were given a load of stuff from the live show. We'll get to that in time. We have a few things here today. What do you want to start with?
Mr Silverman? It's mostly a food-based episode this week. So get used to that. We did a little music on top of the show.
That'll have to cover that genre. Let's eat some mustard. We got crisps. Now, this is where you go, I can't remember the name of the people who gave me stuff.
And it sounds that makes you sound rude and incompetent and unfriendly. So what do you want to say? Who gave you the most did he like? It was...
Is it? What did you say the guy's name I said? I told you a few times didn't I? It is hot in here.
Have you got a heating on though? I'm sure yes. I turned off like before we came in. Oh, it's too hot in here.
I don't know what to say. I'm entering a food state. No, you're not. Who's Bob?
We're entering a food state. Oh, hey! So let's get into fooding. You told me the name Chris Weatherall, is it?
Who did the songs for us? Who did the country ever new song and what was the other one? I can't remember. I say between.
Again, it's the fuchsate part of me. I say between. Oh, yeah. That was good.
Yeah, two-fanties. I say between one new competition. And so we said could you do in a song for next year, but it wouldn't be in competition because it's too good. And it was brilliant.
It was both tracks, it'd be brilliant. Both tracks and brilliant. Thank you. But it was his girlfriend, who gave me this mustard from Poland, is it?
Again, they spoke to you not me about the mustard situation. Sorry, I can't remember anyone's name. It was nice to meet everyone. I'm sorry.
Thank you for the mustard. Human beings and we apologise. Sorry. This is Polish, I believe, though.
What does that mean then? What does it mean to the mustard if it's Polish? Because mustard is a particularly British thing, right? Am I wrong?
Is it? Is mustard a British thing? Absolutely not. Where's mustard from?
World wide. All over Europe. It must have originated somewhere, originally, like the common mustard flavour. I would say it's from the Germanic party.
Don't get that pissed. On the website, Britannica.com, say, mustard. Mustard. Pungency.
Two. Yeah, I've got that. The principal types are white or yellow. It mustard a planted Mediterranean or Italian.
Or Indian. Or Indian. Or Himalayan. It goes far and wide, isn't it?
It's complicated. It's just funny that the basic ingredients of mustard seems to have been a universal example of food mixed. Yeah. And also, if you think about it, spice was so important for early colonial...
Oh, well, without actually, it wouldn't have found the Americas and all that stuff. Found the Americas a bit more. But, you know, why? Why?
Why? Why? People were living there. They bought from the point of view that the spice traders, they discovered a part of the world they didn't know existed.
They did. They were horrible colonialists. Absolutely. Right.
Yes. We're on the same page. But I'm saying there was all that thing about pepper and chili, but mustard, because it originated in the Mediterranean. It must have been used much before black pepper or chili to spice up food, if you see what I mean.
Black pepper. It has a heat. I've known we've discussed this in the podcast before, because I love sources. But mustard has a different heat profile.
It's a sulphurous heat profile. Like a horseradish. Yes. And horseradish is also native to Europe, I'm sure.
They're related in terms of their heat they produce. But different. Question. Yeah.
These haven't got fish in, have they? I would not have thought so, because if they are. Why would they have fish? Just in case you don't know what we can check for.
They publish mustards, maybe pollish mustards have a sardini aspect or something. No, they are different flavoured mustards. Yeah, we've got three jars. It's like mustard, dark mustard, darker mustard.
We've got one that looks like it's just got onions in. And you must have never had that before. Mustada. Zibububly, zibubly.
That's what that says. Next one is... I'm going to do a little picture search. Mustada delecateceone.
And it looks like this is a chilli one. That's chilli. It's got a little chilli heat on it. And the last one is a star-old polsker.
And it's not a little chilli heat one, but it's only two where the other one was three. No, that can't be right. It's said that's what... Would you be the says there?
And this one said smack spreads that. Right, that's had three chilli heats, and that had two heat that chilli heats. Oh yeah. So don't you call me a liar on the podcast?
I wonder if it's chilli heat or if it's just mustard heat. Mustard heat. You should find that, aren't we? Isn't that funny?
Then we're mucking up the flavour of the crisp. No, it's your call, mate. Yeah, there's no neutral crisp in that selection for us to get a basis. You know, well, we're staking kidney.
It's just Jerusalem mustard. Right. What does that mean? I know it's got Jerusalem artichokes.
Are you going to eat those? What are Jerusalem artichokes? They're a thing that aren't artichokes. They look a bit like ginger and make people fart.
Why wouldn't I be able to have one? No, maybe, you know. I've never had an issue. It's only fish and seafood products.
Yeah, anything that comes out of the water will wreatly is really good. Seafoods, I mean clams, welks, mussels, cockles, eels. Can't I use the mustard? Oh, can't I use the mustard seafood?
Bass. Abalone. Perch. Soul.
Fonk soul. Fonk soul brother. Right about now. Right, can we just eat this stuff now, please?
Yeah, it's all mustard, isn't it? Yes, it's all mustard all the way down. I think Rob's, he must be a big brand because there's a lot of products here that squeezey ones. Well, you know, they do what looks like mayonnaise as well.
Right. Can we get on now? It's 15 minutes in. May, it should be getting on.
No, it's on to what? I'm just going to open this one. Let's try them in order. What order?
What order? The onion won first. Right. And then ascending heat.
Open it. I'm going to open it. This one is the first jar for the lightest of the coloured of mustard and this is the one that's got onions on it and it's only got one chili. Right.
Pop, which means it's good and it's safe. I'd say that, in fact, if you think about it, it's not an English thing, that's it at all. Oh, boring. Christ.
Let's just get eating that. It's such a cunt. No, come on. Let's just get eating that.
Why do you have some of that? I like the smell of this. I'm going to give it to you. I want you to tell me what you think it smells like and I guarantee you will get spot on.
It just came into your head. I'm going to tell you what you think it smells like. You will instantly go, oh, that's that. Come on.
It's such a recognisable smell. It's weird. Come on. Give me a clue.
I mean, I like the smell. It's a known Heinz product. Oh, it's all a cream. Yeah.
It's not a... It's like salad cream. You know what? The word salad cream came into my head.
But no, that means it's too obvious. That's why I said that's why I said you're going to get it. So obvious it's like salad cream. Yeah.
And I like salad cream. You know what else totally smells like salad cream. Gareth weirdly. No.
The Monster Munchum. The Monster Munchum. It had... It was too much mayonnaise, which we tried.
It was too bad. It was too easy going now. We turned into a demon. Yeah, before it was the demon episode, wasn't it?
Yeah. I'm not going to do it. No, just don't bring it up again. I'll move it on.
Yeah. Paul, I'm just going to finish my mustard point. Calcalf is a bad demon. I don't know if it's my mustard point.
You think about French. They got the smooth and all the bubbly... With the poppy bits. They never had a whole grain mustard.
You never had a whole grain mustard. Yes, they have had a whole grain mustard. Well, they don't do whole grain mustard here. It's a French thing.
So immediately there, you're wrong. You're wrong. About England being the home of mustard. I didn't say that.
You asserted it. You asserted it. You said it. I said it.
You're like, oh, Gavin, we put it on our gamut, don't we? Mate, I was just saying it might inquiry. What is it? Is it an English condiment?
Is it mostly known as English condiments? Absolutely not. Right. That's the point.
I wasn't decrying anyone's belief. Or was I stating that it was the British condiment of choice. But English mustard is famous world over. So maybe that's what you want to ask.
This is fucking getting dragged out now. It's only an hour, mate. We're making fun of this. No, we're not because of this is the first thing we've done.
Come on. Stop piddling around with your phone. Almost 20 minutes in. Mate, is that counting up or down?
Up. Right. What's the point of that then? Mate, it's an hour we stopped.
But then we still have to do the math to work at how much time we got left. And you were like, now I've got two things going. Your phone and the recorder showing the exact same time going up. You want to start another one?
It makes no watch there. Does it? I don't know why you're getting some france. A time account down.
So we can see the oncoming deadline. I can just do it. I can just count. I can see when it gets to 50 minutes.
I can see that it's 10 minutes to be done. You might as well just stop the thing. I'm going to go for 20 minutes. It's fun.
I'm going to go for 20 minutes. It's fun. I'm going to go for a game over boys. I'm telling you, having fun.
You didn't even do the right thing. It's not fun. It's not fun. Go to America.
Yeah, I am. This is in the future. I'll be back by then unless I'm dead. This is what I'm saying.
It's going to be nice. No, people remember me as a bastard who ate everything about what he does and who he is. I mean, to have some mustard. I'm ready to spoon the mustard into the gun.
I'm going to have a bit of a load because I don't know what this is. This is the onion stuff. Yeah, this one smells of salad cream. I don't like that.
That's very sweet. To me, that's your salad cream. I get the mustard notes. That is 87%.
It's very mild and sweet. But there's a granularity. You can get the powder when it gets down. Yeah, the grittiness.
It's like grit. Which isn't in salad cream. That's way all the way down. That's why I said 87%.
Isn't it? 100%. I think that's nice. I love the sandwich.