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My name's Renee, and I am bad at movies. That's why I ask my friends to make me watch their favorite movies that I've never seen before. So, on today's show, I have my friend Dave Quinones. Oh, my God. What a funny dude. He picked an amazing, amazing movie, Batman. And it's the original Batman from 1966. So, holy crap. I've actually never seen this movie. I've never even heard of it. Like, Batman, what? What is that? So, I'm going to do a blind judgment. Just based on the title alone, I'm going to say that the plot of Batman is a professional baseball player who ends up getting his dream job to work.
in the major leagues. The only problem is he has to work his way up by starting out as a Batboy. A 40-year-old Batboy. So let's go ahead and watch the movie and see what it is. Here we go. And now, the plot of Batman in under a minute. Holy boat trouble, Batman. Let's get in the Batplane. It does a fellow good to know that they're up there doing their jobs. Batman, Robin. All the villains are on the loose. Oh, let's take a look. Catwoman. The Joker. The Riddler. Penguin. Umbrellas.
Among many evil things that we're doing, let's mainly dehydrate people from the fake UN. Submarine battle. Curse splash. Ouch. Giant bomb. There's just some days when you can't get rid of a bomb. Hey, we'll fix them. Wrong languages. Robin, we've done our job. Let's leave discreetly through the window. Batman.
Hey, Dave. What's happening, buddy? I'm chilling. I'm having a great day. How are you doing today? Oh, man, I'm good. So we just watched Batman last night. Wow. It is a joy. It is a wonder. Oh, my God. I didn't know what to expect. I mean, it's so ridiculous and over-the-top and campy, and I loved it. Yeah, it's very different from just about anything that's in pop culture and the media right now. Yeah. I know that when we look at...
the change in the 80s of Batman to being that dark, gritty thing, it was a direct response to this movie and the cartoon that was going out. I think it was the Super Friends cartoon that was also really fun and bright and just silly and goofed down. But this movie is 100% fun, bright, silly, goofed down. Yeah. Just nonsense. It was refreshing for me. I mean, they just, like, I loved just the little things that they would do, like, in the Batcave. Everything was labeled, like, Bat something. Bat radar, Bat pole, Bat mobile. Right at the top, you know, one of the best bits that they do is...
when there's the shark that starts eating his leg, and Robin has to bring down shark-repellent vet spray. Yes. There's three other cans that they don't even deal with. There's three other manta ray whale-repellent. This is nonsense. It's complete goofball nonsense. It took me a while. I think I asked you a few minutes into the movie, do they know that this is all ridiculous, or are they taking themselves seriously? They're very serious about how ridiculous it is. Yes. Everyone's in on the joke. I love that. It's just so dumb. Oh, God. It's so funny. Oh, I forgot to mention Pete is also your peeper. Hey. Hi, Pete.
He can also watch the movie. He can chime in when he feels passionate about something. I haven't felt passionate yet. Oh, dear. Well, we're only a minute in, so it's just, all right. Oh, boy. I mean, yeah, I think that just, I haven't seen too many of the other Batman movies. I've only seen, like, The Dark Knight. I haven't really seen, like, the, or maybe, you know what, I did watch The Batman and Robin, like, George Clooney. Oh, I hate that one. Yeah, and that's, like, the one that I watched growing up and thought, this is good. I was, like, eight years old, and it was just bright and colorful and didn't care that the suit had nipples on it. Oh, the nipples are such a travesty. I mean, everything in that movie is a train wreck.
They tried to be fun and campy, but were trying also to be way too hip about it. Yeah. And it just didn't work. And I don't think that – it just was not well put together. Whereas this one from the 60s, it came out after the TV show. So they already had the world and the way that they were playing and interacting established and then just got a huge budget and got to do even more fun and ridiculous things. Yeah. That's the way to do it. Yeah. And they just – it's so dumb. It's so dumb. It's weird that I enjoy this movie.
Because of how dumb it is. I tend to hold a highbrow opinion of a lot of things even if I'm a little quiet about that sometimes. I don't always share that opinion with people. But I definitely – this is a huge exception because of how – just nonsensical this thing is yeah that's so funny I mean yeah I didn't think going into it like just because I know like some of the other movies that you had suggested are like very critically acclaimed so I thought this one for sure was like because you picked it because of the integrity that it had to the storyline of Batman or you know something like there was a serious reason you liked it and then we started watching it I was like oh you like it because it's dumb I love this it's awesome so silly yeah I know it's definitely the outlier in the list that I had up there which had things like Crouching Tiger and The Matrix and this amazing western but this is a goofball action movie action in quotations yeah Yeah, it's – I'm trying to think of when – I've always liked Batman. I can think back to being a kid. I mean the interpretation of Batman for the cartoon is one of the best things that's been done in animation and for Batman. It's truly an incredible thing. But going back to the – the Batman is just huge. He is a human in every single instance. There might be some ridiculous alien version alternate universe kind of thing going on. But I haven't read that deep into the DC worlds. But he's a dude that with –
his body and his mind, he's able to do things. Superman is boring. Superman's super lame. He's an alien. You can't relate to him. He's a nerd. He's a nerd hero for nerds. Nobody cares about that. But Batman's cool. People like Batman because unlike every other superhero, his weakness is that he's human. So he's the most relatable because it's either that he's sad or that he got shot. He's a human, so he has human weaknesses. He can go down. If a train hits him, bye Batman. Good night, Batman. You get tied to those train tracks and Superman doesn't show up like a nerd to get you. That's it. Game over.
I think when I first got introduced to the series, it was something that was just on, that I know that my parents had watched and enjoyed as a kid, or as children, rather. And I saw it and was like, this is insane, especially because I was a kid, too. So seeing all that goofy, wacky stuff happen definitely made a strong emotional connection to it, aside from it just being well done for the style that it's in. And thinking, going kind of with the idea of the weakness thing, or them being human. Granted, in this particular instance and iteration of Batman, he has a loophole answer for everything. The utility belt is just, it's the...
Everything is in there. And the Joker is clearly amazing and he's the best thing all the time. But I think of one of the episodes in the series where Mr. Freeze is there and, of course, there's just a vat of ice cream or something stupid. And then he just turns on his heat button. And that happens a ton of times in the movie. There's an answer for every question. But he still gets in trouble because he's a dude. Just a regular-ass rich man that is gallivanting in his costume. But because of all that money. You know what's so funny about that is now that you mention it, ironically, this version of Batman is maybe the most powerful version because he...
Has he solution to everything immediately. It's just that there's no ever any high stakes. But I feel like if there was like, oh my God, somebody's going to place a dirty bomb in Chicago. It's okay. I have the bat thing. He'll save that too. He's got it. Yeah, that was my favorite part is that they didn't even have to show anything. He would just be in like the bat copter or whatever with Robin later and be like, oh, I'm so glad we got out of that situation. The porpoise saved us from the missile, Robin. And it's just like, he didn't even fucking show it. He just explained it after the fact. That was a huge one. The other really big one is when the copter gets hit by the missile and we see it spiraling.
out of control, then they land in the raw rubber. It's just a pile of rubber that they fall into. I was really glad. And it was like a convention that just happened to be in town. I was like, thankfully, the rubber foam convention was in town and had raw rubber piles. The sign said, I think, rubber foam in its purest form. Yes, that's what it was. And Batman just saying, oh, I thought I saw it at the corner of my eye, and I'm glad that I was correct. He's always right. That's the other thing about this one. This Batman is never wrong about anything, which is hilarious. The Riddlers in this one. The Riddlers are so weird.
And Robin just immediately knows them. Oh, God. Have you repeated one of the riddles? I think it was the banana one. It was like, what has yellow skin and can write? A ballpoint banana. A ballpoint banana. And Batman goes, correct. The only logical answer. There's nothing. What? They're always on the same page about what the answer has to be. They're always ridiculous answers. There's nothing about this makes any sense. No. Oh, God. But that's the best part. You are attacked at sea. Sea for Catwoman. That whole introduction of the.
bad guys of the criminal underground is ridiculous. I know when we were watching it, someone mentioned how they have the camera sideways. And that's at an angle. They do that in the entire series. There was a convention that they put in because they wanted to say, oh, these criminals are crooked. So we will show them as crooked in every shot when it's them and their layers are just them. When it's not the big goofy fight scenes, it's always sideways. I didn't even notice that. That's interesting. We learned about that at school in a film class that if you want to make somebody look sinister, you can tilt the camera a little bit because it makes people, you won't notice it, but it makes people feel like there's something wrong with the shot. They just took it to the thousandth degree and just breaking the camera. It must be really evil because I'm having to tilt my head.
to look at him. I wonder if that convention was something that existed before or if someone said, oh, this is a thing that this goofy show did and movie did, but we don't have to do it as ridiculously as they did. Yeah, that's interesting. I don't know. Yeah, it was just like you can make a person look like they are slightly askew by adjusting the camera like that. I don't know. It's a bit corny. I just loved all those supervillains. That was so interesting. And their lair. And they all had like a little cubby. Oh, man. They had one that was like Riddles. And it was like all the Riddler stuff. And then they had one called Jokes. And it was all the Joker stuff. And then they had a little one for the penguin. And it had like a fish tank in it. Penguin food. Penguin food. That's what it was. It was penguin food. And then I don't know if we ever saw Catwoman's. But all of her secret lair stuff had like pink bows and ribbons. She's a girl. Catwoman's shelf was just.
behind like one of those Asian folding things that you change behind. Her thing is that she changes costumes. Because she's a woman and ladies wear a lot of outfits. Those three guys have weapon boxes and she has a powder room to get ready. She has claws on her little gloves. I would love to be Catwoman for Halloween but even just the costume she wore when she was in disguise as Kitka and she had it on a huge leopard print hat and trench coat. Oh man, I want that outfit. She's a fashionable villain. I think that holds true in all instances of Catwoman. She's pretty on point with what she's got going on. Which I know was...
an issue when The New 52 came out because it was just straight up misogynist and sexist. It was just awful. Well, that's a problem. Part of her whole thing is just like, oh, she can get away with things because she makes dudes want to have sex with her. I'm a sly cat sex lady. Here it is. And, you know, there's always tension between Batman and Catwoman. Yeah. And, of course, in the movie, it plays out. And, oh, Batman's such a, or Bruce Wayne's just the craziest. He's such a weird dude. He's so eccentric and just his weird speech battered. Get cut. I.
I'm enchanted. I'm trying to think of what he said when they were in the apartment. And he said, I think I'm about to lose all control. Oh, yeah. I'm terribly afraid. I'm about to be overwhelmed. You're a millionaire, dude. You should pay somebody. Take a class or something. Yeah, just the way that Adam West looks at those lines. And I can just picture him with his script and putting a comma after, like, we need to go.
to the bakery. The way he talks is one of the best parts. You just are hanging on every word because he pauses like that. So funny. Yeah, it's definitely something for that character. I'm actually not sure what his body of work is outside of...
this Batman and being on Family Guy. I'm not really sure what else he's done in between that. Oh, I know. I know a little bit. He's played Catman in the Fairly OddParrots. Yeah, he's done a lot of voiceover stuff. And he actually, I don't know if it's the current animated Batman, but like a recent one, he has gone back to being a voice on Batman, but he is the commissioner now instead of Batman, which is pretty cool. That is awesome. Yeah, I just looked at that today because I was like, I just wanted to see all of Adam West's clips of him on Family Guy. And yeah, I pulled up an interview with him and he said that. I was like, Jesus, I didn't know that.
Going to the commissioner a bit, that's a thing that's very different in this iteration of Batman. I'm just going to keep doing it. Yeah, yeah. Where he is not an outlaw. And I think this is the only time. I think in one of the more recent cartoons, or if you see Justice League stuff, he's not really being chased or discouraged from his vigilantism. But in this instance, it's super encouraged, and they want it. And the Bat-Signal is, which does exist in other iterations as well. But for this one, they work directly with him. He has a phone line that goes, that bright red phone. He calls the...
the commissioner's office and says, oh, hey, what's going on? Or he'll get the call is actually what happens. And then he shows up. And when they did that thing, when they revealed all the villains, they were just in his office at the police station. So their friends are tight. And that's a unique and cool thing. They're just like, oh, yeah, it doesn't matter. He's one of us. He is a crime fighter. And at the start of the movie, there's two things where when they're in the Batcopter and a dude, or they do a whole bunch of things with people pointing up.
Batman, oh, Batman, yeah. These girls just jumping on a roof. Yeah. But they're just so dumb. All in bikinis, like, oh, we're just having a rooftop party with one dude. The 60s were a great time if you were a white male. But in that series of shots, you see one where there's a military man and they look up and salute Batman and take their hats off. And Batman just waves down, doing a great job, boys. It's interesting that that was how it was interpreted for Batman to be a straight-up good guy through and through. And he's just a pure, pure heart. And even in his inability to deal with women, it's...
He's not coming from a bad place. All of his actions throughout the movie and series, however cartoonish, are intended to be lighthearted or just kind in nature. Man, I think we talked about this a little bit while we were watching the movie, but how amazing would it be for them to just completely strip the whole grizzly, like every single superhero movie that they're doing now is like everything is dark and just kind of depressing. For them to just completely throw that away and go back to this really, really campy, silly Batman. I think it would be incredible. It would be very important.
in a different way, it would pop just because no one else is doing that right now. Yeah, exactly. That trend, and we can blame this movie in a sense for it because, again, all that stuff was in response to the brightness and people wanted to bring it back down. Yeah. And I think, Pete, were you telling me about the thing that when they did The Dark Knight, I just completely lost training? Oh, yeah, this was an article. Yeah. Yeah. I read an article about the new Muppets show that just came out that they blame Frank Miller for
doing the Dark Knight comic that took Batman and made it super grisly and the gritty version for... That was the trend of us doing that to every single piece of pop culture. Making the gritty reboot of fucking everything down to now the Muppets so that they're having sex with humans. Don't get me wrong. It's not like I've never wanted to see what Miss Piggy looked like. It doesn't need to be all serious. I could go on the internet and get all my questions answered. But everything being darkened and made serious, that pattern has gone across...
Absolutely everything. We see it. I mean, if you think about even video games and cartoons, we have seen them change and become things from Ratchet & Clank to Gears of War. It's absurd, and don't get me wrong. There's a great pleasure I get in chainsawing a man in half when I'm playing Gears of War. Super fun to just put a chainsaw into a human's face, but I think I might also like throwing a battering up to the top of a building and climbing up it sideways. I think there just needs to be a balance because both of those kinds of video games still exist. We still have Splatoon on the Wii where you're shooting paint at squids.
Gears of War, but with movies, especially with superhero movies, it seems like there is only one kind of superhero movie. And with the saturation of superhero movies, we've got to see some other kind if we're going to just only put those out. I know that we disagreed about this when the Marvel movie came out, when the last Avengers one came out. I think you were saying, Pete, that it was... That there were not enough stakes for you. That you didn't enjoy how they were being lighthearted about it. But I think that that is at least an effort in that direction. And I know DC is not doing that at all. You know, what they did with Superman. Again, he's already lame. But then when you take him and make him a killer, Superman is not a murderer. That's not the type of thing he did. But then he snapped the dude's neck at the end of the movie. And I met Zod, or the actor that played Zod. Yeah, he did. He was not nice. I did not enjoy meeting that man. I was like, all right. I was kind of the old I.O. Dave was like, I got to go talk to him. And he introduced himself and he was just like.
Okay. He pretty much asht his cigarette on my face. Is that Michael Shannon? Yeah, he seems like a fucking weird-ass dude. I've heard more than just you, I've just heard people say that he's just an odd bird. That's probably true, and I guess when you're a giant and you've been in movies, your life must have challenges that I don't understand. Ah, dude, he's an ass. Just let him be an asshole. Be an asshole. Man, I'm a nerd. No, but you're right. Renee, you didn't see the last Avengers movie, but a lot of the dialogue was super hammy from the heroes. Yeah.
But it didn't work for me because that was the only aspect of that film that was hammy. Like, the villain wasn't – I mean, it was sort of goofy. It was like that Batman and Robin movie where, like, yeah, they did a little bit of goofy hamminess. But overall, it was still sort of, like, a serious movie. So it just fell out of place, not, like, on purpose. I want them to take it all the way and just be like, we are aware. Like, this is all very – like, this is all a joke. Like, none of this should be taken seriously. Like, a parody of itself, but it is still a Batman thing. Like, I'm trying to think of any sort of, like, pop culture examples to throw in of, like – I'm just thinking about –
like Adam McKay or Will Ferrell any of them like the stuff that they do is all like from the beginning we're all in on the joke and it's just like this really all of it's ridiculous and none of it should be taken seriously. I think what's missing was the deadpan part. Yeah. It's like I want it to be hammy but I don't want them to acknowledge that they're doing that. They're not going to turn at the camera and wink. Exactly. Leslie Nielsen kind of delivery where it's just so dumb and bizarre but they're delivering these lines like they're not dumb and bizarre. Yeah. This is truly the reality in which they exist. Yes. You know just with the dumb bizarre stuff you think of in
the office of the commissioner where he just says, oh, of course. They're just responding to each other's nonsense. You know, going back to the riddle kind of thing. He'll solve a riddle and then, you know, the Irish officer in there is like, oh, yeah, of course, yeah, that's where it is. And I'm not really doing Irish accent because I don't do accent. Didn't he say something to Robin when he called in, like, turn on the bat signal so this happens. He's like, oh. Devilishly clever. Devilishly clever. It's the immediate acceptance of, yeah, this is right. Yeah. And we think of, you know, the other tools and the literal tools in the movie where, you know, the penguin's umbrella.
turns open, he flips it open and it just sprays gas as it flies down the hallway and knocks out an entire security team. Or when we're being introduced to the villains and the Joker puts on his buzzers and zaps the Riddler and the Penguin and it's just, they are in pain from this goofy little thing. These things would absolutely not be able to do what they're doing. You know, the submarine, which is hilarious because it's a Penguin submarine. It's powered by little flippers. Yeah, it's got his little penguin feet just flying behind it. But that's just what we do. And the Periscope comes up and it's a little Penguin face. You know, again, the whole utility belt thing when they're trying to find out where the image of the, there's a ship that...
goes missing, but there's a super-powered lens that's on an illegal buoy in the middle of the ocean, and then they take the Batboat out, and they're looking at it, and the magnet turns on, so all the metallic objects that the villains know are in Batman's belt get stuck to the buoy. That magnet is holding them to it, and yet they're able to just take things off the belt. Like, why can't you just move? This is the kind of movie that you can't think too hard about the logic, because they're like, no, no, no, we explained it. We're right. We're correct. Here's the answer. No, we're going to keep moving, because we've got other things to do. Moving on. The approach that needs to happen is, if you're going to do something like this, is you need to present it in a way so that you know.
There's a lot of logic questions you could ask about this movie, but there's no point because we don't care. That's the problem with the Avengers. Kind of did it like that, but then the rest of it still is too serious where it's like, well, now this is just kind of a crappy movie because he looks like you half-assed it. I don't know. Yeah, I don't know if people could get away with that now, you know? Like, because there's just so many people on the internet that would come back and be like, well, that doesn't make any sense. Like, any, like, scientific movie that comes out now, somebody will argue, like, that logic isn't sound. That's not scientifically correct. And I just wonder if people would be able to let it go if it was all a big joke or if they'd be like, well, he was punching a shark in the face and, like, then repelled it. Yeah, like, and it was eating his leg and, like, that wouldn't happen. Like, I just wonder if people would still want to, like, if trolls would still get on it.
Trolls will always be trolling. That's true. But I think that the mass population of people engaging in it would understand and be okay with it. Specifically with science kind of thing, there's the time where they use the dehydrator, which is like the whole plot of this thing where, oh, the bad guys steal this dehydrator so that they can take the water out of dignitaries' bodies and ransom them for a billion dollars each. They test it. The penguin tests it on.
some henchmen and then sneaks them in a goofy you know of course Batman and Robin knew that he was sneaking in but they let him do it because they're always right sneaks them in rehydrates them and then they just die when they get punched because they were rehydrated incorrectly with heavy water instead of soft water which they label very carefully just like everything else Did the Penguin ever realize that's why it failed, or was he just like, ah, screw it, we'll just do it to the UN leaders anyway? I have no idea. They just said, oh, we'll just do it, doesn't matter. I'm sure they didn't explain it. No, definitely not. Sure they didn't. Well, my plan failed horribly in the Batcave, let's just do it anyway. They're not going to know by the time they've given us the billion dollars if somehow we kill Batman and Robin. They'll just get their dust back, and they can worry about it. Each world leader, which are the most ineffective world leaders, by the way, will be returned to their country after having achieved no progress. That seems interesting.
And I guess the idea of having ineffective world leaders isn't super far off. They just heightened it by having every person speak in a separate language, although they all seem to be understanding that they're just yelling nonsense at each other. So yeah, they'll just get returned to their country, no big deal. I'm going to translate all those lines. What are they saying? Oh, I don't know. Yeah, I'd love to know. But yeah, I just love, I mean, my favorite part of the movie was just the fact that when Batman and Robin came in and fixed everything and rehydrated all the dignitaries correctly, they all just go right back to yelling at each other like nothing's wrong, but then they're all yelling in different languages. And Batman and Robin just basically look at each other and go like, well.
We fucked up a little bit. Let's just sneak out before they realize anything's wrong, and we kind of saved the day. Yeah, good enough. They're humans again, so that's all that counts. Before he says that, though, he's like, perhaps this melding of the minds is the greatest gift anybody's given society. If not, let's go. Justifying his mistake, yeah. Just a complete rationalization of the hugest fuck-up that could ever happen, and then they go out the window discreetly. Right, no consequences. I love that everything is of no, there's just nothing matters. No, it's just there's a day in the life of Batman and Robin, and that's it. The fact that there are no stakes.
makes this even more hilarious. In that scenario, they walk out the window or climb down. The other big one that comes to mind is when they have the bomb. They both go in. They fall into the trap that doesn't work because nothing works against Batman because they capture Bruce Wayne. Oh, just kidding. Batman can't show up to save himself. But they go back to the place after to save Kitka. Although they know everything except that a thin mask doesn't actually veil anyone's identity. And the people that have their identity fully known still wear thin masks sometimes like the Joker or the Penguin. There's no reason for that. I know that there's...
Painted white man with green hair is the Joker, but who is this white man with green hair with a mask on? His thin purple mask that matches his suit. He's dressed just like the Joker, but I can't tell who he is. Also, I just want to say, that bomb was at the end of its fuse the entire time. He's just running through the street. He had about a good five minutes of that bomb just being the fuse. It's just about to explode the entire time. Yeah, there was no string burning down. It was just right at the end the whole time. Just spraying sparks out as he runs by the same baby and nun.
So wait, I can't even remember how did he eventually get rid of it. They don't show it. He did, in fact, get to a place, even though every time we saw him trying to throw it into the water, there were ducks or making out people. But he got to a spot where I guess those things weren't and then jumped behind heavy iron bars. That's what it was. Oh, my God. Yeah, I remember that. So funny. Robin, I was fine because I miraculously knew that this pile of metal would save me from a bomb. Oh, God. So many things to make fun of about this movie. So good. I think to appreciate. To appreciate. You're right. I'm sorry. Not make fun of. I want to know what, just to wrap up here, what would you rank?
the other Batman movies that have been made since then. Which one is favorite to least favorite? Favorite might be I would say is the second one The Dark Knight Rises? The second one is really good. Then probably go back.
To the 90s one with the Joker. Then the first one of the most recent. Was it Batman? Batman Begins. Dark Knight Rises is the third one. That's with Bane. You're talking about Joker. The Dark Knight's incredible. Actually, I think that aside from the George Clooney ones, I don't even acknowledge those. Those are complete filth. But the third one out of the Dark Knight series was not good. It wasn't a Batman movie. It was an action movie with a dude. And that guy wasn't Bane, which is a huge part of that.
Yeah, I think that – and I'm just going to throw the cartoon movies, the 90s cartoon movies. Or was it Mask of the Phantasm is incredible. Under the Red Hood is crazy good. Yeah, I think that hits most of them. Under the Red Hood is incredible. You should watch that, Renee. Okay, I will. I will. I actually really, I mean, I was surprised by how much I enjoyed just watching. Because I don't really watch that many superhero movies. But, I mean, this one was up my alley because I found it very delightful. I just don't like when they're so serious and there's, like, real danger happening. But an animated series, that sounds good, too. That sounds like something I would enjoy. But, yeah. I appreciate you.
making me, I'm putting making in quotes, making me watch this movie because honestly you just alerted me to it. And oh my God, I was tickled by it and I want to watch it again. So yeah, thank you so much. Thank you. I'll watch it again anytime. Good, good. So, okay, what can you plug? I know you're also on Small Town Doctor with Pete. Yeah. And it's a wonderful, wonderful team at IL. Well, thank you. There's Small Town Doctor. I think the schedule, I'm not sure when are next. I want to say it's the first. This episode is coming out in November. Never mind. We have no idea. When you listen to this, go to iolchicago.com and look for Small Town Doctor. Yeah. Yeah, so actually.
Because of the future dating, I don't have any dates, but I know that there's going to be a one-man show coming up that deals with race that I'm working on. Great. There's another show that I don't really have so much control over that's a musical show that Pete's also working on and our friends Jake and Jack are in charge of. Yeah. That should be coming out in the future. They're just little things here and there, but I'll just try to keep people on them internets. Keep your eye out for that. Yeah. Keep your ear to the ground. I'll be looking forward to it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, and like Bad at Movies on Facebook. That's all I'll keep plugging until you guys actually.
fucking like it. Oh shit. Shots fired. No I just haven't invited that many people to like it and I just keep expecting people to do that. Renee likes to hand pick who she's going to invite on Facebook instead of picking everyone. I don't want to be rude because I get those requests all the time and I ignore them. But you know I guess what's the harm? Whatever. Well you'll know that you'll have
A good audience if you select them. Yeah, that's true. That's true. I like all of my fans right now. I don't want anyone that doesn't like me to listen to this show. That's awful. Yeah. We'll work on that. We'll work on that. This is going to be a couple months from now, so hopefully by then I will have figured something out or just changed my attitude. All right. So, yeah, to wrap up today's show, we're going to go ahead and have Morty and Ava Rosenblum do their famous critiques. Well, Dave can sit with Morty and Ava. Absolutely. I'm sure they'd love to talk with him. Is this going to be weird because they're older? No, I think it'll be okay.
They'll be cool. Yeah, they'll be cool. They're progressive. Yeah. So, yeah, we can just – hey, yeah, they can come in now. All right. Take a seat.
Hello. Hello, young man. Hello, young gentleman. Pleasure, Dave. Hi, hello, David. Yes, I am Ava, and this is my husband, Morty Rosenblum. Mortimer. Mortimer. Well, you know, we never quite figured that out. That's right. My name is just Morty. Just call him Morty. Okay, cool. So this is a movie that we saw in the theaters way back when, huh, Morty? This was one of our first date movies. Oh, boy. What a great date movie, I tell you. Ava was afraid there was going to be too much action and blood and go on this movie, and I said, I can assure you.
That Bruce Wayne will not let any harm happen on screen. No, you know what? I did love it because even when they punched, they would just say, like, ouch. So it's like, oh, well, that must have not hurt. It just made you go, ouch. Oh, and that's punch. Yeah, a little pal, little bams. Bam, whip, zoop, spruce. Why do you think they did that? Was that just in case you didn't know what was happening, you could confirm that there was some sort of physical contact made? Yeah, I definitely think that that's part of it, that, you know, you get immediate feedback of the damage that's being done, but it's also just to heighten the cartoon element of it. It's just a really fun, explosive thing to see while you're watching this fun.
Batman goofball movie here. Oh, yes. You know what I like? I liked all the leotards that those men were running around in. Oh, boy, ha-cha-cha. Very flattering costumes. Yes. Hello, Mr. West. How are you doing today? I miss those days because, honestly, he was not in that great of a shape, but he was in good enough shape to be a star crime fighter. I wish it could be like that these days. He doesn't have to have a rippled, what do you call it, ironing board stomach to be a hero. Oh, Morty's rubbing his belly. And that's what it is, a belly. Yes. But, oh, boy, Morty, when you used to wear those little Speedos around the swimming pool, oh.
That made me hot in the pants, I tell you. Sorry, David. I'm sorry you had to hear that. That's okay. She would call me Dick Grayson and really accentuate the first name of that name. I think it's beautiful how in love and open about your relationship you are. I tell you, those days it wasn't much love. It was all physical. How much of the movie did you see in theaters? Not much. I watched much like Batman. I only saw things out of the corner of my eye. You know, it was about when the shark attack happened that I grabbed Modi very close and said, protect me, Modi. That's right at the beginning of the movie. Yes. And, you know, to tell you the truth, I wasn't really scared. I just wanted to touch my Modi.
I wanted to get him closer. She said the title sequence in the credits, and that was about it. The rest of it, you could have seen smooch and kiss fly across the air. And snuggle! Exclamation mark. Yes, and kiss smooch. Because I went to the bathroom halfway during the movie. You didn't have to tell our guest that. I've been saying all the other details. Honestly, I appreciate it. Oh, my. You know, there's a lot of movie that you missed. Just so much in between that, in those two parts.
No. I think we got it. I think we got it. I think we got it. You know, it's a bat, and he's a man, and he has a bunch of bat gadgets, and he's got this little boy who is a ward, which none of us – come on. What's a ward? It's just a word for a young male lover. Batman's the daddy, and Robin is the – Oh, Batman's the sugar daddy. Yes, that's it. Oh, no. Did we miss something? Are we wrong? I really – Batman is a pure-hearted man. Oh, dear. Especially in this. I mean –
I thought he was molesting Robin the whole time. We must have mistaken that. I'm sorry. No, no, no. They fight together. They don't fight each other. It's abuse. It's worse than I thought. They're just trying to clean up the streets. There's mean people out there. They're the good guys. I promise you that Batman is a good guy. Okay, all right. Well, we might have to revisit this. I believe you, I guess. It's a wire. It's a misunderstanding. Well, you know what? Even despite that, I would still go ahead and give this movie three out of four fuse-lit bombs that will never go off. I'd give it five out of five dimly lit make-outs.
It's been very lovely meeting both of you. Has it? Yes. Okay, good. Would you like a ride back in Daniel's car? I'm sure Daniel would give you a ride. That's not a problem, right? I said Daniel is here. Yeah, he could give you a ride home. Sure, why not? We'll just load the car up. I've got nothing left to do today. Holy sarcasm, Daniel. Holy sarcasm, Ava. Do you want to watch a movie, Guy? Oh, yeah. Okay, what do you got? Have you seen Alien? I haven't, actually. Oh.
Okay. We've never seen Alien. I've never seen Alien. Are we invited? Yeah, you guys love movies, right? Yes. Okay, but before we watch them, you can't bring any of your hard candies in. Well, why not? I need my butterscotch. We might have to take a break so I can go take a kesploosh during Alien. In space, no one can hear you poop. Oh, no. Oh, no. I hope you're ready for this, Dave. Okay. Let's go. Let's get in the car. Here, have a butterscotch. Batman.