EP149: Why "I'm Becoming Her" Might Be the Most Comfortable Lie You Tell Yourself

Send us Fan MailWhy "I'm Becoming Her" Might Be the Most Comfortable Lie You Tell Yourself On language, money scripts and the identity you're building every time you open your mouthThis week's episode came together from about four different places, and I'm not going to pretend it didn't. But it's also all kind of about the same thing: the words we use, the identities they're subtly building, and the very comfortable trap hiding inside one of the words we use most in this space.I start the episode talking about my VIP day with the brilliant Sue Jones-Miranda, human design queen and someone who has this unsettling ability to see straight through you in the best possible way. I'd been doing all the things, finishing the book, planning the September event, pushing forward on every front at once, and I could feel the burnout highway starting to appear on the horizon. The day with Sue brought me back to myself, back to what actually lights me up, writing and in-person connection, and reminded me that even when this is what you teach, it can be genuinely hard to see it in yourself.Then a few days later, at a property investing event of all places, a stranger said something to me that stopped me in my tracks.I'd casually said, more than once, that I'm financially illiterate. And he looked at me and said, quite gently but quite directly: well, that's the problem, isn't it. The way you're speaking about it.And he was completely right.In the episode I get into why that landed so hard, including the inheritance of that language from childhood, my dad's obsession with pensions, the rebellious kid in me who switched off, and the years of financial abuse in my marriage that reinforced an identity around money I've been carrying ever since. It was one of those moments where you realise a script is still running the show long after the circumstances that created it are gone.Which brings me to Abracadabra and why that is literally a magic word.And then there's the word I think we all need to be a lot more careful with. Becoming.On the surface, it sounds like exactly the right word for this work. And in some ways it is. We need the vision. We need to know who we want to become. But becoming lives in the future tense, and the future tense is a very comfortable place to park your dreams indefinitely. Becoming, left unchecked, turns into permission to wait. It becomes a polite, socially acceptable way of saying later, babe.The shift I talk about in this episode isn't to stop having the vision. It's to stop letting her live permanently in the future tense and bring her into the now. Not become her eventually. Be her now. There's a difference, and it's everything.I close on the difference between predictability and possibility, and why so many of us choose the devil we know over the woman we're actually capable of being. Certainty isn't coming. But trust? That's available right now.In this episode:Why I nearly burnt out again and what a VIP day with Sue Jones-Miranda reminded me about coming back to myselfThe moment a stranger at a property event called out exactly what my language was building in real timeFinancial abuse, inherited money scripts and the identities we carry long after the circumstances are goneAbracadabra: I create as I speak, and what that actually means for the words you're using every dayThe trap inside the word "becoming" and why it might be keeping your dream permanently in the future tensePredictability versus possibility, and why trust is the only currency that actually matters hereMentioned in this episode:The EDIT Your Life Journal, available on Amazon now in paperback and hardbackIf this episode landed for you, please share it with the woman in your life who needs to hear it. Leave a review if you've got two minutes. It genuinely helps other women find this show who need it most 🩷🔥 DOWNLOAD FREEBIES TO FUEL YOUR REINVENTION📲 FOLLOW on Instagram and Facebook🩷