Ep27 Dr. Constant Mouton on the Neuroscience of Recovery: Why Families Can't Think Their Way Out of Addiction

Diana Oehrli sits down with Dr. Constant Mouton, an addiction psychiatrist from the Netherlands, to explore why traditional family intervention models leave everyone dysregulated and stuck. Dr. Mouton shares how families can move beyond the exhausting cycle of confrontation and detachment by understanding the nervous system's role in addiction recovery. Diana guides the conversation through practical applications, especially for high-net-worth families who often try to "buy" their way out of discomfort rather than doing the regulation work required for lasting change. Listeners will learn how to create structured family meetings that prioritize safety over shame, why the person struggling with addiction isn't actually the problem, and how to set boundaries that preserve relationships instead of destroying them. Dr. Mouton reveals the neuroscience behind why people relapse when they return to unchanged family systems, and introduces the concept of copy blocks that keep addiction thriving in secrecy. Diana challenges the assumption that wealth provides protection from addiction's grip, exposing how privilege often creates blind spots around accountability and the tolerance for discomfort. Together, they explore why ketamine treatments and ayahuasca ceremonies without proper integration can do more harm than good, and how families can become central to recovery rather than obstacles to it. By the end of this episode, you'll understand how to co-regulate with a dysregulated nervous system, why recovery requires the entire family to do their own work, and how to build the kind of connection that actually supports long-term sobriety. Whether you're watching a loved one struggle or questioning your own patterns, this conversation offers a roadmap for families ready to stop outsourcing healing and start participating in it. Chapters (00:00:00) - Why We Go Back to the Trauma(00:00:40) - Dr. Constant Mouthon on the Need for Family Recovery(00:04:46) - Working with families in the addiction treatment(00:09:50) - What is the overlap between family symptoms and those of addiction?(00:11:28) - The role of families in addiction care(00:14:37) - How to Keep It Safe in the Addiction Meeting(00:18:55) - Co-regulation and the window of tolerance(00:24:04) - Shame and blaming in recovery(00:29:31) - How to Get Out of Anger During Treatment(00:35:44) - Emotional Detoxification (EMDR)(00:40:27) - How wealthy people get help with their addictions(00:44:35) - Psilocybin and ketamine: What wealthy people might do(00:48:13) - Emotional Therapy: Recovery Tools(00:51:24) - What is a family's role in the recovery process?(00:54:13) - Mental health treatment and recovery in the Netherlands vs the US(00:58:11) - A Real Cost of Wealth