Ep9: Using ABA to Grieve

What if behavior analysis could help you understand your grief—not eliminate it? In this deeply personal episode of The Mystical Analyst Podcast: Where Culture and Constellations Collide, Quintara shares how losing her godfather earlier this year reopened the grief of losing her grandfather years before. She reflects on the unexpected ways grief shows up, the significance of seeing ambulances on the day her godfather passed, and how those moments shaped the way she understands both loss and healing. As a Board Certified Behavior Analyst, Quintara explores how the principles of ABA have helped her recognize her own behavioral patterns around grief—not to suppress them, but to better care for herself through them. From anticipatory triggers and environmental cues to adjusting expectations during difficult seasons, she discusses how self-awareness can become one of our greatest coping tools. She also opens up about the emotional reality of becoming “the strong one” after losing her grandfather, the responsibility of caring for family while carrying your own pain, and the truth that grief doesn’t always ask for permission to return. In this episode, you’ll learn: How ABA can help you recognize and respond to your own grief patterns Why certain dates, places, and memories trigger emotional responses The difference between trying to “fix” grief and learning to live with it Practical ways to prepare for emotionally difficult seasons How love continues to shape us long after someone is gone Whether you’re grieving the loss of a loved one, navigating anniversaries that still hurt, or simply trying to understand yourself with more compassion, this episode is a reminder that healing isn’t about forgetting—it’s about learning how to carry love forward. Because sometimes, the most compassionate thing we can do isn’t change our behavior. It’s understand it.