Ephesians 4:30-32; Hebrews 12:14-15 - The C Word, Cancer; The B Word, Bitterness

As we examine these verses, we are talking about the attitude of bitterness.I have been to the hospital many times with people who were waiting on testresults. I have stood there when the doctor walked into the room and said, “I’msorry to tell you, but you have cancer.” I have received phone calls frompeople who went to the emergency room thinking they had a surface problem, onlyto discover they had pancreatic cancer or some other very serious and dangerousform of cancer. We call it the “C-word.” Nobody wants to hear the C-word. Noone wants to hear the word cancer. Rightnow, I am dealing with sciatic pain. On the surface, it is very painful. Butbeneath that surface pain is a deeper problem—a root cause. In much the sameway, many of the problems we experience in life are surface symptoms of deeperheart issues. Attitudes like bitterness often show themselves through anger,wrath, vengeance, and hatred. These attitudes destroy our lives.Bitternessdefiles and spreads. It not only destroys the person who has it, but it is alsocontagious, destroying others as they become involved in our stories,complaints, and evil talk. My friend, bitterness is a disease of the soul. Itis a disease of the spirit and of the attitude, and it must be dealt with. Onlyby the grace of God can we deal with it.Weneed to realize that many of the surface problems in our relationships, which includelying, stealing, fighting, and other actions which we can visibly identify,come from invisible surface causes of our attitudes that are anger, worry,fear, insecurity and other emotional attitudes. But underneath these attitudesare the root problems that come down to basically three things, which are bitterness,guilt, or misplaced temporal values. Those are three major root problems. Butbeneath all of them is one ultimate root cause—pride.  Pridekeeps us from listening to the Spirit of God. Pride leads us into disobediencewhen God tells us what we must do and we refuse to do it. Pride keeps us fromasking for forgiveness for our guilt, or from not willing to forgive those whohave hurt or offended us. Pride keeps us from receiving the grace of God todeal with the problem. Both James and Peter reminds us that only by humblingourselves can we receive God’s grace (James 4:5-7; 1 Peter 5:6-11).Thatis why Paul continues in verses 31–32: “Let all bitterness, wrath, anger,clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind toone another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God in Christforgave you.” So what is the answer? The answer is forgiveness—forgiving oneanother, even as God, for Christ’s sake, has forgiven us. Oneof the main reasons we must deal with bitterness is that it grieves the HolySpirit. When we are bitter, we are not listening to Him. We are not payingattention to His voice. We are not obeying His Word—especially the words ofJesus, who taught us to forgive one another, even if we must do it again andagain, up to seventy times seven. Bitterness is often the result of unresolvedconflict. Sometimes it goes all the way back to childhood—something that hurtus deeply, something we never properly dealt with or resolved. That unresolvedpain can still be destroying our lives today. Myfriend, bitterness is the “B-word.” Let’s deal with the B-word in our lives bybeing kind, tenderhearted, and forgiving. The Holy Spirit is characterized byjoy, love, peace, longsuffering, patience, and kindness—the fruit of theSpirit. When we obey Him, that is what He produces within us, and that is whatboth the Holy Spirit and the Father delight in.