Episode 10: Weak Ties - Making Opportunities Happen

Where do real opportunities actually come from? In this episode, Ben builds on Lewin’s Force Field (removing restraining forces) and Flow (momentum once you begin) to explore one of the most powerful ideas from The Defining Decade by Meg Jay: Weak Ties. Many of us get stuck because of a hidden barrier: “I don’t know anyone.” But opportunities rarely come from filling out applications alone. They often emerge through conversations, connections, and relationships, especially through weak ties, people you only sort of know who live in different circles and bring new information, new connections, and new possibilities. Ben explains the difference between strong ties and weak ties, why most people hesitate to reach out, and why people are often more willing to help than you think. He also shares a personal story about how simply asking for a meeting led to a connection with Sandia National Labs and ultimately to an NSF-funded paid internship with roughly a 1% acceptance rate. This episode introduces a practical, repeatable tool to remove the barrier “I don’t know anyone,” create movement, expand your world, and open unexpected doors. Because opportunity often grows through people, NOT just applications. Now, It's Your Turn Apply Weak Ties Step 1 — Identify Two Strong Ties Choose two people you trust: A close friend A mentor A professor A family member Step 2 — Ask Each for One Weak Tie Say something like: “I’m exploring an area I’m interested in and would love to learn more. Do you know someone I could talk with briefly to understand that field better?” Now you have two weak ties. Step 3 — Set Up a Conversation Best option: Meet for coffee or lunch in person If not possible: Schedule a phone or video call Step 4 — Prepare to Listen This is not about asking for a job. This is an informational conversation. Prepare 3–5 questions such as: How did you get into this field? What surprised you early in your career? What would you recommend someone explore first? What skills matter most here? Step 5 — Be Clear About Your Intention Let them know: You are guided by your values You are trying to learn and grow You wanted to connect to understand the field better When the conversation comes from genuine curiosity and values, it often leads to meaningful insight — and sometimes unexpected opportunities. Step 6 — Keep the Momentum Going After the conversation: Reflect on what you learned Send a thank-you note Ask if there is someone else they recommend you speak with Please share a comment if this exercise works for you or if you've already done it and succeeded (way to go!), share your story and tips so others can benefit!