Episode 11 - Disclosing Your Disability

This week we’re talking about a widely debated topic - when to disclose your disability to a date. Some people suggest waiting a while for people to get to know you. Others, including myself, recommend doing it right away, even in the dating profile. Ultimately, like with anything on this podcast, you need to do you. But for the purpose on today’s chat, we’re going to talk about the pros of disclosing either in a dating profile or soon after you are in contact with a potential date.Disclosing Can Be EmotionalDisclosing, telling a potential date about your disability, can be an emotional issue for many. People often fear judgments and rejection if they share disability information too soon. It’s all very understandable. Your disability is part of who you are. In many cases, there is no “hiding” its presence. If another person is going to have a problem with it, wouldn’t you want to know that upfront? This doesn’t mean that you need to share everything right away. It means that you share your disability, in the same way, you may share about your looks. How to DiscloseYour date takes the cue from you about how to view your disability. If you describe it in a positive way, they are likely to see it that way too. Try these different ways of how to disclose and talk about your disability as you do so: Talk about how your disability shapes who you are. This lets your potential date understand how your disability is an important part of you. Statements such as "My disability has made me the person I am," is great to use.Talk about the person you are and the things you like and do while possibly incorporating your disability. Statements such as "I cruise all over in my wheelchair," says that you're an active person who likes to get out and happens to use a wheelchair.Talk about your disability related interests and activities. This can be a subtle way of sharing about your disability if you talk about what groups you may be involved with, such as a self-advocacy group.Invite questions and conversation about your disability. Use statements such as "Feel free to ask me questions about it." This sends the message that you’re comfortable with yourself and your disability and this attribute will put others at ease. It also demonstrates a trait that most people are drawn to – a sense of empathy. Where Do We Go From Here? Disclosing a disability and at what point you do so is something that only you can determine based on your comfort level. My advice is to disclose pretty early on so that you aren’t wasting time with people who won’t get to know you simply because you live with a disability.Practice disclosing to yourself, family, and friends. Get comfortable with disclosing.Access the download that goes with this episode. It will help guide you through the benefits of disclCheck out our Dating Memberships:Dating Made Easier (for all people wanting to date) - is a monthly membership for anyone (with or without disabilities) who wants support and guidance in dating skills and getting the RESULTS you want in dating and relationships. Click here to learn more. Supporting Dating and Relationships membership (for special educators and professionals in disability services) - is for professionals in the disability field who are looking for training and resources to effectively help students/people with disabilities in developing dating and relationship skills. Click here to learn more. Music by Successful Motivation | Artwork photo by Elevate