EPISODE 198 - Charles DeLong Academy For The Gifted

It's dump on Dennis day here at Who Asked You? HQ. That may sound like a celebration from our 'Calendar' segment, but sadly, it's not recognized by any government, group or organization... just the co-hosts of this show. Dennis is absent from our studio do to some food poisoning that required him to be near a toilet. But he's with us in spirit... and in the ErrorFM chat room! We spend the first few minutes of the netcast poking fun at our pal's poop predicament and then it's down to business... poking fun at everything else.First a couple of past due E-Mails. Thanks to a recent server change, which I had to find out for myself and was never informed about until the inboxes quit working, we have two messages that fell through the cracks. The first brings us a list of the most manly names out there that are actually real people! The other revisits the story we did about Pizza Hut offering weddings on Valentine's Day for $10,000 with an alternate location just as pathetic to host your special day.As you've probably noticed, we sometimes like to get warmed up with a few stories out of Tinseltown. First up, news of a sequel to THE MUPPETS film from last year. It was a success and Charlie says it followed the Muppet movie formula, so another feature with Jim Henson's characters is no surprise. After all, the characters are already created, there's a simple template for lazy writers to follow. And the budget is big enough to hire a couple of big names to interact with Kermit and friends. Hollywood is good at taking things already created and recreating them. And by good... I mean bad.There's another classic getting the reboot treatment. We knew it was coming and it's probably better Dennis wasn't in the studio to hear it. He probably would've slit Jabari's throat (he sits the closest to Dennis). The director of the new ROBOCOP has found his Alex Murphy in actor, Joel Kinnaman. Nothing against the guy, but he looks like he should be posing in a catalog, not a cybernetic cop costume. The director, José Padilha explains that his reimagining of the film will focus on the time between when Murphy got riddled with bullets and when he goes on duty as Robocop. He wants to explore the transition from man to machine. And we want to explore the transition to the next story.If ever Charles DeLong were to run his own school the way Charles Xavier did in the X-Men comics, he would probably have math problems very similar to those we tell you about on today's show. Here's the deal... a teacher in Washington DC got fired after assigning some math problems to his third grade class he printed out from a home schooling website. Sounds fairly harmless right? Don't forget, this is math class, Charlie-style. The website, homeschooling-paradise.com features a rather unorthodox style of teaching arithmatic known as the 'Singapore Math Method'. The nearest I can tell, it's a style of problem solving that uses real life like situations. The difference here is that the site seems to be attempting to hold the kids' attention by making the problems gross, morbid and just twisted. They are funny as shit... but the parents of the third graders at the Trinidad Charter School didn't think so. Get a load of this question on a third grade worksheet: Brian, a brave member of a SWAT team in California, had a terribly busy week last week. He had to work for 7 whole days. He killed 163 terrorists, 296 murderers and 206 arsonists. How many criminals did he kill on average each day? After solving this one, the teacher would then lead the class in a rendition of "America, Fuck Yeah". You can read more awesome equations like this one by visiting the Home Schooling Paradise website in our Show Links.We've now got just nine states left in our 'It's The Law' segment. Washington has one of the most peculiar laws we've EVER heard since starting this bit. Charlie calls it out. Be sure to stay tuned for it and many more.Lastly, breaking news from China as an eldery woman sort of dies, then comes back to life and is forced to climb out of her own coffin! You don't wanna miss this one. Given what her neighbors did to all of her stuff, per Chinese tradition, she might have just stayed in the box.