Episode 198: Healing From Church Wounds - Battling the lie, “Your needs don't matter,” with Jeff and Terra Mattson

Is it selfish or is it healthy to advocate for your needs?  In this episode, the first in our series, Healing From Church Wounds, we address the difference between grace-based systems, where imperfect people can safely express their needs, versus rigid and legalistic systems, often led by unhealthy toxic leaders, where individual needs are ignored or dismissed. How do we learn to honor our own needs and the needs of others at home, at work, and in our community? When do we go to God with our needs and when do we lean into relationships to help us? Join us as we dialogue and unpack this complicated, but important, topic together.    Jeff and Terra Mattson are the founders of Living Wholehearted, a professional counseling and executive coaching and organizational development firm outside Portland, Oregon, helping leaders live and lead with integrity. Their team of professionals are coming alongside leaders in the home, work, and community, providing confidential and safe places for leaders, their families, and their teams to find healing, wholeness, and health. Jeff and Terra are the co-hosts of the weekly Living Wholehearted Podcast, co-authors of the book, Shrinking the Integrity Gap: Between What Leaders Preach and Live, and are raising their two teen girls. They are also the founders of Courageous Girls, a non-profit dedicated to helping moms walk alongside their daughters at every stage of their growing years (learn more at mycourageousgirls.com). Bridging the gap between Biblical truth, clinical research, and trauma-informed relational wisdom, the Mattsons are writing, speaking, training, and coaching leaders in both sacred and secular spaces so that there are more wholehearted leaders in a broken and hurting world.    Check out more at livingwholeheated.com. We serve a global community through our Executive Coaching and Wholehearted Leadership Cohorts. Apply today! If you live in Oregon, you can take advantage of our professional counseling team. Consultations are free!   If you are a woman in the greater Portland, Oregon, area and you want a day to slow down, pause, and reconnect with God, join us for a contemplative prayer day at the Living Wholehearted Lodge & Retreat on September 22.  Learn more and register at www.livingwholehearted.com/prayer-retreat. Limited spots available.   =======================   We LOVE that you’ve decided to join us this week for the Living Wholehearted Podcast. We hope you enjoyed the conversation, tips, and resources to help you transform every relationship that matters most to you. If you think this will help someone you know, make sure you send it their way or share on socials. Tag us @living_wholehearted and @terramattson! Don't forget to FOLLOW/SUBSCRIBE so you don't miss an episode and help spread the word by leaving us some stars on a review. Thanks for partnering with us to help more leaders, just like you, who want to live and lead with integrity at home, work and in the community.  Go to livingwholehearted.com and sign up to receive our free leadership tips and updates delivered to you in our monthly newsletter. And, if you’re a girl mom, check out mycourageousgirls.com.     Until next time, be the leader you would follow!   Grateful for you, Jeff & Terra   To connect with Jeff & Terra Mattson and Living Wholehearted, go to:   INSTAGRAM @TerraMattson @Living_Wholehearted @MyCourageousGirls   FACEBOOK @WeAreLivingWholehearted @MyCourageousGirls   WEBSITES LivingWholehearted.com TerraMattson.com  MyCourageousGirls.com   RESOURCES Shrinking the Integrity Gap        https://davidccook.org/shrinking-integrity-gap-book/       https://a.co/d/dRiP4Ii Shrinking the Integrity Gap e-Course        https://www.livingwholeheartedstore.com/e-courses Courageous: Being Daughters Rooted in Grace       https://mycourageousgirls.com/shop/p/book-courageous-being-daughters-rooted-in-grace Dear Mattsons        https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLdPzQ_cUwCbRc-MQ40KL3a6ze06CiY38l Helping Moms Raise Confident Daughters        http://cpguides.org   =======================   The Living Wholehearted Podcast is a part of the Christian Parenting Podcast Network. To find practical and spiritual advice to help you grow into the parent you want to be visit www.ChristianParenting.org