Episode 23: Steele Justice

join us this week as we witness true manly heroics with John Steele in 1987’s Steele Justice! The Karate Kid’s Martin Kove turns in a wonderfully wooden performance as the shellshocked Vietnam vet who gives no fucks about the laws of God or man, has a deadly pet snake named 3 Step and trains by doing squats with an unweighted broomstick. When John’s backstabbing nemesis from ‘Nam resurfaces and murders his old war buddy, Steele springs into action. But he isn’t being recruited – he’s being UNLEASHED! (That’s an actual line from the movie! Fucking fantastic!) The resulting chaos is a mashup of every 80s action movie cliché, but taken to a ridiculous, poorly executed extreme. Epic 80s action songs, a music video, and explosions for no reason, plus the added racism of every Asian person knowing martial arts and being evil. After slaughtering all his Asian enemies, Steele is able to ride off into the sunset, shrugging off the laundry list of felonies he’s committed to achieve his victory.