EPISODE 267 - Cretaceous Cunnilingus

Some dinosaur-on-woman action!Show of hands, who here doesn’t mind an erotic story? And who here doesn’t mind when it involves animals? Alright, a lot of hands just went down. I’m about to make the rest of them vanish. Who here doesn’t mind animal erotica when it involves dinosaurs having their way with women? Hey wait… all the hands just went back up. “Taken By The T-Rex” is just one of several dino-erotica short stories available for download on Amazon.com. For a few bucks you can read all the lizard lady lust your Kindle can handle. We have co-authors, Christie Sims and Alara Branwen to thank for these tales, and a listener E-Mail for turning us onto them. These ladies didn’t stop with prehistorical porn, they’ve written about the pieces of ass even mythical creatures have tapped including the Gryphon, Centaur and dragons. Can they make one of these stories into a movie instead of “50 Shades Of Gray”? Coming to DVD this week is another film in the CHUCKY franchise. CURSE OF CHUCKY sees the return of our favorite little diabolical doll. The film stars Brad Dourif, who is once again voicing Chucky, his daughter Fiona Dourif and Jennifer Tilly for some reason. It’s nice to see they’re still sticking with Dourif to voice the character. What’s not nice to see is that the movie is straight-to-DVD. Is this what Chucky has been reduced to? I guess he and the movie studios could only be ‘friends ’til the end’ of the last movie. As we’re all aware here in the USA, Americans like to complain about stuff. We here at Who Asked You? complain about crappy movies a lot. While others, like hypocrite Walmart and Sears shoppers, complain about Halloween decorations. This year’s winner is a rubber skinned dog prop. After the item appeared on Walmart, Sears and Amazon shelves, the three retailers began getting complaints from people who felt the prop was in poor taste. Yet, the gutted adult man strapped to a gurney the next aisle over is A-OK. And so are the countless animals slaughtered on a daily basis to supply the meat departments of all these stores. We can’t place more value on one animal’s life than another’s. To these people complaining I say this: That cow you made into a meatloaf had just as much right to be on this planet as any dog or cat. And lets not forget, this shit is FAKE! It’s a rubber Halloween prop! It’s not REAL! Focus that hate on animal cruelty at puppy mills and chicken farms with tiny cages in deplorable conditions. Meanwhile, other complainers are mad that “naughty” appears in the title of a toddler’s Hallween costume. The “Naughty Leopard” features a black and purple tutu with kitty ears AND absolutely NO inclination that it’s sexual in nature. According to tightwad parents though, the word “naughty” insinuates the costume is sexual somehow… yeah, only because that’s where your mind went. You think the company that made the thing was thinking, ‘this 3-year-old girl is a sexy, naughty little thing, lets call this costume the Naughty Leopard.’ No, it’s a child, she’s being naughty not nice. She’s being a spooky little kitty. The adults whose minds immediately thought sex when they read the word naughty are the true perverts here. While on the subject of sexual deviation, perverts and being naughty in any number of ways… 4Chan has turned 10-years-old! The popular anonymous message board has become one of the top-400 websites in the United States. It gets tens of millions of unique visitors each month. Many of which are posting offensive, yet hilarious gifs and memes that’ll ultimately get shared on Facebook. 4Chan’s creator, Christopher “Moot” Poole, describes the site as an Arkham Asylum for the Internet. If 4Chan, despite all its questionable content, didn’t exist, the wackos who use it would be unleashed onto the rest of the web’s sites and there’s no Batman in real life to subdue them. So kudos to 4Chan for absorbing all the crazies. We break for lunch at the Who Asked You? Cafe and try the Ghost Burger. The red wine reduction sauce is to die for! And the communion wafer adds that little extra kick. This biblical burger comes from Kuma’s Corner in Chicago. They name all their hamburgers after metal bands and this one is dedicated to the Swedish group, Ghost. They’re popular for dressing in religious robes and painting their faces like skeletons. And, as I mentioned earlier, we American’s like to bitch about stuff and this piece of meat and communion wafer slapped between two buns is no exception. Some are calling the burger disrespectful. Others couldn’t care less and are trying it out of curiosity. It should be noted the wafers aren’t consecrated so there’s nothing really holy about the beef. Surely, Catholics can find something else to be more outraged by than this? No? Oh… well… okay. The restaurant says it’s selling nicely and will continue through October, so… get over it. Count Scarpa, whose name we’ve decided should go to a Marvel villain, is filthy rich and wants to take a piece of his fortune with him to the afterlife. Although he’s not currently near death, after watching a documentary about Egyptian Pharaohs he got inspired. You see, in ancient Egypt, the great rulers of the time would have their most prized possessions buried with them because they believed by doing so, those things would go with them to heaven or hell or wherever they believed they were going after biting the big one. Scarpa is doing this as well, only he’s not dying and could still get a lot of use out of the expensive item he’s putting in an early grave. What’s he burying? You’ll wanna listen to the end of the show to find out. I’ll give you a hint, it’s worth a half-million bucks! Maybe it’s signed copies of dinosaur erotica? Those belong in the ground with their fossil friends anyway. New DVD Releases for Tuesday, October 8th: Bones (Season 8) Much Ado About Nothing American Horror Story: Asylum White Collar (Season 4) The Hangover Part III After Earth The Purge Naruto Shippuden Uncut Set 16 Psych (Season 7) Curse of Chucky Show Links: The Podcast Awards Buy “Cards Against Humanity” “Taken By The T-Rex” (Dinosaur Erotica) “Ravished By The Triceratops” (Dinosaur Beast Erotica) “The Balaur’s Delight” (Dinosaur Beast Mating Erotica) “Mounted By The Gryphon” (Gryphon Erotica) “Taming The Dragon” (Dragon Erotica) “Rescuing the Centaur” (Centaur Erotica) Walmart.com Amazon.com Sears.com Yahoo! News: Chicago Burger Garnished with Communion Wafer Infestissumam – Official band website of Ghost Bentley Motors’ Flying Spur – Do NOT bury this car. IMAGE CREDIT: Costumes4Less IMAGE CREDIT: KATU-TV Heard In This Week’s Open: Cape Fear Trading Places The Way of the Gun New Jack City The Blues Brothers