EPISODE 294 - Rolling Sarcophagus

It wasn’t planned. It just so happened that as I was assembling the show’s rundown this week, all the stories involved money some how. Whether it was companies spending huge amounts of it to buy other companies, saving money by drinking a new ‘food of the future’ or investing in real estate. Currency seemed to be a recurring theme. We’ll start with news that AT&T — pending regulatory approval — is buying DIRECTV. The companies “claim” that this will allow them to offer better bundling options and better values to customers. This of course is total bullshit and is just the continued consolidation and elimination of competition in this country so that telecom and television providers can charge whatever the fuck they want because there would be no other options. Even music services online aren’t immune to the consolidation effect. Take the reported purchase of Beats Audio by Apple. Somewhere along the line Apple decided that the new Beats music service that goes along with the overpriced headphones the company sells, could be a threat to iTunes. So the only logical solution is to simple absorb Beats like some giant gelatinous blob of cash consuming its victims for nourishment. Buy the company, then kill it. This is speculation of course, but it’s likely the only reason Apple is willing to pay $3.2-billion for Dre’s pet project. Although, a company such as Apple that’s shrouded in mystery and likes to keep things secret until official announcements, are a little ticked after a supposedly drunken Dre spilled the beans in a YouTube video before anything was made official. It’d be hilarious if his gloating about this making him the first billionaire rapper actually kills the deal. Microsoft is dealing with the fact that users don’t want to pay to have access to Netflix and Hulu on top of paying the monthly subscription for Netflix and Hulu. Microsoft is the only console maker that’s doing this. But that’s about to change. According to industry buzz and the Xbox website FAQ, in June — likely during E3 — Microsoft plans to stop forcing a Live account on those that just want to watch the two streamers. And they’re also willing to refund a prorated amount for folks who just renewed their Xbox Live accounts when this new policy goes into effect. Dennis will be taking said refund. While AT&T is buying DIRECTV and Apple is probably buying Beats By Dre, YouTube is thinking of buying Twitch.tv. Twitch is a streaming platform for those who want to watch others play video games. Launched in 2011, Twitch has become insanely popular with 45-million users a month. Pondering the purchase of a new title? Twitch is a great way to check out some of the game play and even chat with like-minded gamers before you plop down that $59.99. Those who stream can partner with the company and make a little side cash running ads or convincing viewers to subscribe to their channels for $4.99 a month. YouTube, which also has channels for users and the ability to stream live, may be wanting a piece of the video game netcast pie. I doubt they’re threatened by Twitch as YouTube is a billion times more popular. But it does make you wonder what game they’re playing. If you’re looking to save some money, why don’t you stop eating solid food. Don’t worry, there’s a meal replacement out there so you don’t starve to death. It’s called Soylent and it tastes like homemade Play-Doh. Soylent is a powder you mix into a glass of water and consume as a meal. It contains all the vital nutrients, minerals and vitamins your body needs to function. Developed by a software designer who can’t cook, it’s only appropriate the recipe is ‘open source’ meaning you can adjust it to your liking. Maybe add a little something to get rid of the chalkiness? The price of Soylent comes out to less than $4 a meal. You can order it now and it’ll ship in a few months. Are any of the Who Asked You? Crew up for an all-liquid diet? Find out on today’s show. General Motors has recalled millions more cars due to various defective and/or cheap parts that are putting drivers’ lives in danger in some fashion or another. The massive amount of unsafe automobiles being recalled this year outnumbers the total cars they sold all of last year. As GM is under several investigations internally and externally, documents have been released that don’t exactly cast a flattering light on the company. It claims it knew nothing of the defective ignition systems installed in Chevy Cobalts that started this whole mess. But in a 2008 PowerPoint presentation — part of those docs that got released — meant to train employees on how to deal with recalls, a bizarre list of “judgement words” GM didn’t want staff using to describe their cars sounds like they’d driven this road before. When words like “decapitating”, “disemboweling”, “grenade-like” or “Kevorkianesque” can be associated with your cars so much that you have to tell you employees to avoid using them when writing E-Mails or talking to customers… something isn’t right. We read off a few more of these keywords on this episode. And it wouldn’t be a show all about money without some real estate news. If you’re looking to invest a nice chunk of change in a property that’ll make that money back, might you consider Dracula’s Castle in Romania? Although there is no actual Dracula, the real man he’s based on, Vlad III, Prince of Wallachia or more famously known as Vlad the Impaler, was believed to have been imprisoned in Bran Castle. Impaler? Maybe Vlad has come back as a reincarnated GM engineer. Bram Stoker, who wrote the Dracula story, is said to have read about Bran Castle and based his characters abode on it. Check out the castle’s website in our Show Links. You’ll see why he chose it. It’s pretty spooky looking pirched atop a cliff in the outskirts of a Transylvania city called Brasov. The castle has been refurbished and is in remarkably good condition given its age. It attracts over 450,000 paying tourists every year so if you were to pay the estimated $135-million the place could fetch, you’d likely make your investment back fairly quickly. Unlike GM shareholders. Show Links: AT&T DIRECTV Apple Beats By Dre Forbes.com WWE Vince McMahon, Chairman & CEO of WWE Ars Technica: Sources: Xbox Live to remove Gold requirement for Netflix, Hulu Xbox Live Gold FAQ YouTube Twitch Soylent Ars Technica: Ars does Soylent… Embrace the chalky weird sweetness Huffington Post: GM PowerPoint Told Workers Not To Say ‘Cobain,’ ‘Deathtrap,’ ‘Rolling Sarcophagus’ And More Bran Castle