Episode #31: I get worse before I get better - Change always sounds good... Until you have to do the work!

Ever start making changes in you life then, after a while, you're worse off than you were before you started? That's where I am at this exact moment! I've been working on being more kind and compassionate at home with my wife and son and I'll be damned if it doesn't seem to be getting worse. I felt great for about 2 weeks but lately, I feel more on edge, more restless and less compassionate than ever. This is probably an exaggeration but I feels true! I've been in a place in my life for a while now where I'm wondering, "what the hell is missing"? There have been so many good things in my life but something still seems off. So, I've been digging into some of the behavioral traits I've been living in since childhood. Some have served me well over the years and some have been making me miserable. In doing so, I've been having breakthroughs and ah-ha moments almost everyday. These breakthroughs make so much sense and seem like such easy fixes, yet, I'm still acting a fool! I figured emplementing the changes would be a piece of cake. The truth is, anytime someone makes major changes in their life, it often get worse before it gets better. The traits, thoughts, behaviors and attitudes I've been living in since childhood are deeply ingrained in my body, mind and spirit. It's no wonder it seems like my survival instincts are kicking in and hanging onto this behavior for dear life. My dysfunctional behaviors like people pleasing, codependency, fear and negative thinking have protected me for 39 years. They're not just going to "go away" because I had a few ah-ha moments. It's going to take some consistent work on my part. What that looks like for me is meetings, writing, prayer, meditation and helping others which all bring me closer to the sunlight of the spirit. It's in a strong relationship with a power Greater than myself that helps me make long term, continuous change in my like. Self-knowledge availed us nothing and will power alone is no match for the things inside me that want to keep me safe, comfortable and ultimately, miserable! If you have any questions or would like me to cover something specific, email me at [email protected] . If our know someone that needs help or may benefit from hearing this podcast, share it with them. You could save someone's life. Like, comment and share where you get your podcasts!