and welcome to episode 34 of Sitcom Geeks, I'm James Kerry. I'm Dave Cohen. And we are here talking about mainly some first 10 pages that have been sent in a long time ago. Apologies, we have taken a while to catch up, but we've gone back to the start, and we've actually got three scripts that we'd like to go through.
We've probably been picked up and gone to series and broadcast in the time that you actually get back to you. I think that series three has just been green-lighted. Absolutely, absolutely. So they're up in the bottle episode, as we speak.
Apologies for that. There's always episode five of series two, that's the bottle episode. Anyway, before we get there, a few bits and pieces to talk about. We've had some emails again, probably decades ago, by the time you actually think about it.
But we have a question from Cassie Atkinson, who says, please cast your minds back to before you approach, for listeners who don't yet have produced a script that is all amazing comedy legend friends like yourselves. What advice would you give about going from draft one to draft two? Any checklists you possibly use or thoughts? Yes, oh, that's a very good question, because we often feel when we've done draft one, especially starting out that, oh, great, that's it, the hit Sitcom has been written.
And the longer you go on, the more you look at draft one, I think even you mention this in your book, don't you, it's basically you're getting something onto a piece of paper or onto a file that's structurally correct, and you're gonna have to do a lot of work on it. I mean, the main thing is you can definitely read it and reread it, and you will find, when you're reading it, you'll just find that you'll know automatically where things aren't working and you'll need to put them right. I mean, certainly, sorry, the first thing I think you should do is show it to somebody, somebody who you trust, and get their honest opinion on it. Now, I happen to know, Cassie, I know you know a lot of writers and performers, so maybe you could even get it performed with your friends around the table, and you'll get a sense then of where the rhythm is working, what needs changing, and that would certainly help, I'd say.
Definitely, that's a really good thought, just to read it out loud and to just hear it, and it's actually, just hearing it really focuses the mind on whether it actually works or not, the stuff that works on the page that doesn't work when it's read out, and it just is just a way of shaking it up. The second thing, it sounds obvious, but it's just worth saying anyway, make sure that draft two is better than draft one, rather than different, and so one way is to have a read through, so you've got some sense of what's different of what needs to change, ask people get notes. But also, a way of doing that yourself as it were, is to put in a draw and come back to it two or three weeks later, and you will feel differently about different bits with a little bit of distance, especially if you're able to forget about the whole thing, and start again. So that would be one thing I would do is go through it, from scratch, one thing I intend to do is just print it out, and stop trying to change it, but go to a cafe without your laptop, just take the script with you, and a pen, and read it again, and start making notes on it, and put lines through, lines that you've really never liked from the first place, but you've never thought for a better one for all those sorts of things as well.
And be prepared to lose jokes that you'd love, if they're getting in the way. Just put them somewhere else, and if you're wondering if there's a strange noise in the background, we are actually recording this in a room where there are a couple of guinea pigs. That is not a joke. I know that sounds like a joke.
I genuinely think guinea pigs in the back, maybe we'll take a picture of them and put it up in the face with the page right. So, I'm just trying to think of anything else which I would suggest, just making sure that every line is fighting for its place, making sure that every line is within the character, rather than just being set up to jokes that you like, I think once you've got draft one out of the way, as it were, you can then start to see it in a little bit more, with a bit of a cooler head, because in a sense, you've written it, so now you can work out ways of improving it. So that would be my bet. I think getting notes if you can, reading it through yourself, a bit of distance if you can, and just work out a way of how can I make this script better, rather than how can I change jokes that I'm now bored of, into jokes that may or may not be as good as the ones you had to begin with?
I'll do it for a start. Yes, I think. A little note here from Nikolai Moss, and the response that we've got written down here is, we can't read back on your sketches. Right.
Sorry about that. So, people send us lots of things. We're not gonna read a full script. We're not gonna read beyond first 10 pages.
We've actually stopped taking submissions for our first 10 pages, because we have a bit of backlog, it's getting a bit embarrassing. But we also, we're not gonna read sketches or anything like that, we'll movie scripts or anything. So thanks for thinking about us. But we would love to have time to read sketches and give feedback from them at a time we do not have.
Although on a professional basis, if you want to get a whole episode of a sitcom, script read or like a bunch of sketches, script read as a sort of job lot, really, then we do offer script reading services. So, we do, Dave does. At this point, it's me at the moment. So you can find out the details of that on my website, DaveCohen.org.uk.
So, if you would like some notes, then for a whole script, then go to DaveCohen.org.uk, follow the links, and he will be able to give you a proper script reading service. But that's not part of this podcast, but obviously it relates to it. Thank you, Robert, Rob Stringer, it says Rob, maybe it's Robin. Your podcasts, books are super helpful.
Thanks, thank you very much. So my cool question is, what do you do when you're sick of unwittingly bears some resemblance to an existing one? However, this question encompasses a number of related anxieties. Oh dear, here we go.
I guess other writers have these two, so I appreciate it if you were able to at least pick out your favourite of my anxieties to speak about. Recently started hammering out a fairly original high concept script, dishearteningly, annoyingly, I found out that a recent radius sitcom exists, which is the same genre at the fine, but similar-ish, if not exactly identical concept. Do you talk about that? Right, well, it's not that.
I mean, two, the first two things that I'd say about that are number one, it's to be realistic about this and a little bit brutal, your sitcom is probably not gonna get made. I think that's, we have said this before. And it goes for us too, David, Dave's sitcoms and my sitcoms are not gonna get made. As it happens, I once managed to get a sitcom made.
This is an outlier. I had a series on the radio, I had a series on the TV. I've actually several series on the radio. But you know what I mean?
But yes, what you're hoping for at this stage is that someone reads your script and thinks, oh, they're a very good writer. I'll ask them to come and work on this other sitcom that I've got up and running. So that's the first thing. I said, don't really worry too much, I would say.
The second thing I would say, in fact, I remember very well, Omi Jilili, who was a very hot at this point, he was one of the hottest people in comedy and he had this brilliant script and it got a long way down the road. And it was all about people who were extras in movies. They even have been called extras, I think, but it was all kind of in the pilot and all shaping up nicely. And then Ricky's your base next project after the office.
Oh, I'm gonna do nothing, I'll do nothing. That extras, that was it. Sorry, Omi, to end of your project. So it happens.
So that's happened at every level. I had a sitcom on the radio, I think, I think it was offered to BBC Two. It was about management consultants. It was also BBC Two who had just done absolute power, which is also about sort of PR consultants.
And a BBC Two said, we've just done a sitcom about consultants. I don't think we wanted another one. So the two shows were not actually similar at all, really. But there were some similarities.
That's just the way it goes. Overall, seeing that script as a way of getting you, getting you noticed, I would say, is probably more of a concern than actually trying to get that particular show onto the TV or the radio. So also to say, the show probably aren't that similar. I'm actually written a blog post on this, by the way, called, I can't quite remember, if you look through my blog, there's something called Hell No, That's My Show, I think, which is, you know, you just switch on the TV and you've just seen that it's your show that's on.
Your take on that subject matter will be different, your characters will be different, the attitude will be different. You need to kind of make it your own. And actually, there may be a way in which you can change your show to make it appear much more different. There may be a way of trying to find, oh, sorry, it's just looking up now.
It really is called Hell No, That's My Show. And what on earth, January 2014? What advice did I actually give? I think it's along the lines of, I mean, look at that.
But there might be a way of making yours more different, putting a bit of clear water. It may be that your show, you may have two sitcoms that are set in schools, and there have been current show set in schools in the films about education and big school, along with Waterloo Road and Grange Hill, or whatever it is. Educating Essex. But your show about schools might be about the arrogance of youth, or it might be about a PE teacher.
And somebody else is thinking about a school, maybe, about the management of schools and educational theory and all that kind of stuff, in terms of when you're born it down, what it really comes down to. I wonder if there's also commissioners. They like to say no. And there's always a good reason to say no.
Sorry, we've had a sitcom that's a bit like that. But I wonder what happens with people who commission dramas on BBC? I've got this, it's about a killer, and he kills beautiful women a lot. I'm sorry, we've already got reals off.
Fifteen programs that have that. Absolutely. It's a show about the police force. We've already got to show about the police.
Sorry. So I hope that's helpful. You also got to say I want to pitch it because I think it's funny, and it might serve as a calling card. So I think you're getting what we're talking about.
However, I can't imagine it's a good idea to write a submission as to saying, hey, I know you've produced X, but mine's obviously different. I mean, maybe you don't send it to the people that made the show. Unless it's still running, in which case they might be looking for writers for it, saying maybe you could. Yeah, there's lots of production companies out there.
And you get a very good idea of what's being made and what may be made if you go to the Comedy website, comedy.co.uk, British Comedy Guide, and they have a page I think called In Development. Fascinating. And there's lots of stuff there that we'll never get made, but you get an idea of what's kind of, what's out there at the moment. Great.
So those are questions for today, and we're now going to the CACSAR first-time pages, whilst our game picks are hanging out in the think of water behind. Yeah. So which should we start with? Well, I suppose I've got some big wig is the first one that I've got that I read.
And this is a sitcom by Kennedy Goodkey and Roger Huskett. And this is a sitcom which is, I guess, set in the future, dramatic, dystopian future. It has a very big story opening, very sort of bravely world kind of opening. And if you want to follow this along, go to our Facebook page and you'll be able to take a link to find where these scripts are.
So you can download this first-time pages for yourself and read the script by Kennedy Goodkey and Roger Haslett, who are from Vancouver in British Columbia, in Canada. Well, hello there. Hello, thank you for having us. You've probably moved three times since you wrote this script.
But I don't know. Anyway, but it's a good, I like, it's got a very big story opening, which is OK in it. It happens quite quickly at that beginning. But the actual, in terms of kind of moving the story on, it is a little bit slow once we've established, yes, this is a dystopian future.
Just to explain it to people who aren't going to read it, it's sort of being woken up and being told that they have a new job and he tries to phone his mum. And his mum doesn't really seem to quite remember who he is. He's called John Gray. He's been given a relatively senior job.
He can't quite understand why. It's a very, very Orwellian big brother, three or two, Kafka, Brazil, the movie Brazil. It was almost too bleak, I would say. It reminded me a bit of a book I wrote called The Road, which was also made into a movie.
And I kind of, I almost couldn't bear to read it. It was so dystopian and horrible. And I did feel it needs a bit more humour, really, if it's so... Yes, I mean, I know that's sort of crazy to say.
But I was surprised by it. But this felt firstly, like, potentially the beginning of a movie, which is interesting because I think a number of people now are sending us stuff which feel more movie-like than sitcom-like. So it doesn't feel like a sitcom. But I was optimistic at first because, in one sense, it's very, very straight.
And because it's really, really serious, and the Kafka-esque Orwellian nightmare is basically really well realised, I was expecting a thundering rapping joke to come along at some point. Kind of like they used to do in Red Dwarf a fair amount, where they would play that pompous card and then Holly would come along and say something really stupid and undermine it all. Well, what I liked at the beginning, there's this point where he's... Obviously, everyone can be seen by a CCTV, so he's obviously being watched, or you think he's being watched.
And he's told he mustn't fix this gas pipe or something. And it's up kind of... He does some little fiddly thing and fixes the gas pipe anyway. So, like, very early on we've got, oh, right, this is like...
This is going to be like about a prisoner who knows how to play the system, almost like a sort of a porridge character. But then there's no more... That's just like a one-off thing that happens. And I think that, if you're for your next draft, I would explore that aspect of his character.
So, if it's a sitcom about... What is a sitcom about? Is it a bit... Obviously, it's a dystopian future, but is it about...
Like, porridge was about winning little victories against authority. It's kind of what my stage four is about in a little way. And brave new worlds as well, trying to get these little bits of humanity. The other thing, so in a sense, what I like about the show is the fact that it does have tons of ambition, and it does take you to another world.
So, I think there's loads of... Because, you know, lots of shows, lots of scripts are just basically people talking, and not terribly interesting people talking about it not very much. This is really interesting, this is really well realised. So, it feels like an area where you could really do some good comedy.
It may be that it isn't a comedy, which would be fine. But the other thing that's... What doing this can sometimes give you the impression of is that an awful lot is happening. And actually, in the first ten pages, our hero, John Grey, isn't actually making any decisions at all.
He's being woken up, he's being pulled around, he's being given this job. He tries to phone his mum, it doesn't go very well. At one point... OK, so there's a couple of lines here.
He mourns the piece of his nightmare after he's woken up. OK, that's a line from a movie script, which you might be talking about. John's gaze drifts to his window, the world outside. I think we're trying to play meaningful moments, which you're either one to undermine if it's a comedy, or you want to probably cut.
But ultimately, he's reacting to everything that's being done to him. And for me, that's a bit of a worry. Without a single exception of the guy he subverts the stuff. Yeah, so I think that is worth making one out, because otherwise, although it feels like a lot was happening and it's a very exciting new world, the protagonist is ultimately being pushed around.
So, that's something that an awful lot of bluster can make it look like. You've covered up that, so you can get to the end of ten pages and think, wow, awful lot's happened. But actually, what do you think about it? You think, why do I not particularly want to read on?
Would I want to read more than the test? Would I want to read more than the ten pages you've given us? I would probably read a few more, because it is a completely different world than setting and I'm curious to know what goes on. So, in that sense, it is a bit of a tick.
But overall, the slightly waiting for jokes, which is worry for me. There's almost too much happening in terms of the action, but not enough in terms of the characters and the characters and what's going to make this work. I do like brand big ideas and things, but I worry that you've used the entire budget for the show in the first ten pages. There's like explosions and all sorts of things going on.
And, and talking back to the email we had earlier, there are a lot of dystopian sitcoms out there. There was one on the radio. In fact, I wrote one about five or six years ago, which we did the first ten pages off here. And, you know, it is a common subject.
It's up there at the moment with bankers and kids having to move back in with their parents. And, you know, as I say, I know I've been there, I've had those rejected as well. So, great. Well, thanks for sending it to us, Kennedy and Roger.
Also, the title Big Week is like, it feels like the Big title doesn't really, because it exterior, it starts exterior. The Republic Wasteland. Well, he's a famous camera and then it's called Big Week, because that's actually such a comic title. But he's going to be chosen to be the next one.
Yeah, I sure. The word Big Week is not the kind of language that they would use within the show. So it feels like, yeah, it feels like you're setting up a show that you're not actually following, which we do next. I'll have two of you.
What's your next one? Well, let's go for another script that is a little bit filming. And I say that it's filming because, as I was saying, this is Monster by Michael Richardson, who was in Glasgow. Thank you very much, Michael, for sending us this to look at.
Again, it was, as I was reading it, by about page four or five, maybe in page six, I was thinking I've read an awful lot of action lines, an awful lot of direction and people looking this way and doing that, and not actually saying very much. That's page eight. I've written, there are a lot of action lines, not much dialogue. Is this a movie?
Is this what I've written? Well, the fact I wrote down, yes, wow, gripping, great opening, five minutes of a movie problem is it's a sitcom. And there's a loss of back story. Now, to be fair to you, you sent this to us probably even before we mentioned that we don't like back story.
Yeah. But that is something that we do stress time again, that back story is the enemy of a sitcom. So just to explain to people who haven't got the script in front of them, we have a character called Will, who's, it's 1995, he's eight years old, and he's in bed and he is worried that there's something in the bedroom, poltergeist, wind, which is, you know, and his dad comes in and says it's all fine, and there's a little sister who pulls his leg as well. And then we cut forward to 20 years later.
He's a successful kind of trendy executive type who leaps out of bed, goes to work. He is then fired and then 37 seconds later, he's on the roof of the office, wearing his tie around his head, Rambo style, hair all over the place, Asalie Unhinged. They want his ID card back. He throws his ID card over the edge and then he jumps off.
And then he is being picked and then he hits the pavement. And then three months later, he's been driven back to his home, in his dad's car, and opening titles. Page eight, I think, the opening is open. Page seven, page seven, page seven.
This for me is where the story starts. And then we get lots of other character descriptions. And then he's clearly going to have to adjust to being back at home. So the first six pages are set up, and I know we've talked about what the ideal pilot is, and the pilot set up the show really, really quickly.
So it feels like you set up very quickly with six pages, and again, a lot happens in those six pages. Somebody has a frightening experience as a child, they go to work, they get fired, and then they jump off a building. That's great, but that's weirdly not telling us that much about the character. Because he's a little scaredy cat as a boy, and then for some reason, you set up the character who's going to be frightened.
And then 20 years later, he's a trendy art market guy who's very positive, and today is going to be a good day. It says in an action line, which is a bit of a cheat line, and you probably shouldn't mind that. And then... Because it's going to actually be the worst day.
And then he's going... And then he's having a chat with the boss who's trying to work out where telling them he's fired. But he's very, very positive in this meeting, and then the penny drops. And then he sort of goes mad, wearing his head Rambo style.
If somebody's doing that, they're not suicidal. Rambo makes me think they're going to go on the Ram patients, start to kill people, like Michael Ryan did in the 80s. But actually this is taking him into a place of suicide, which is fine. And then when he is brought back home, he doesn't really have any lines other than, have you been watching Game of Thrones?
I think it's his only line. I jumped off a building. It's his key line, actually. But we've already seen him do that, but you get the idea that he feels like...
And I think that to just go through those things that James has said there, none of them actually relate to each other. So the first five pages, he's a slightly scared little boy. The next couple of pages, he's a happy, successful person. The next page or whatever he's about to jump off a building.
And then we get to the point at which, for me, the sitcom starts, which is he goes home and there are all these people around him. And it feels to me that this is where we're opening. In fact, I would even do as the credits, kind of almost as it has. But this would be like the very opening credits would be him arriving and then this sort of arrives home and then this kind of welcome home sign.
And then there are these various characters. There's his dad, his step-mom, his mum died when he was very young. Again, that's another thing that he's getting a little bit in the way of, what's this show about? There's his sister.
And then there are these various other people around us as a nosy neighbour. And you can convey all of these people and what's going to happen if you have an opening scene. You'll just see all these people, meet at seeing him come back and that would be somebody who's made really happy to see him, somebody who's nervous about him being back. You can tell so much of the backstory in those opening credits.
You can even have, because you've got a baron, which is a welcome home. It's a serious name. But also somebody else can be written about it saying sorry you tried to kill yourself. It's something that means some really tactless thing, but they're trying to be nice about it.
And then you've sort of done really in a page, what you've sort of done in about nine pages. It won't be as exciting, granted. But we keep setting things up that they're not following through, it's a real worry. The scene, actually, where the CEO, the executive officer is sucking him, I actually really enjoyed those little sections there.
And I thought it's a shame that CEO feels like quite an interesting character. He's a bit young, a bit trendy as well. He doesn't want to suck him, but he's golly, whatever. So that's a shame we're not going to see that again.
And also there's just this very nice moment when he's actually out on the ledge and the character who's called Janet from Accounts. And to see that make me laugh. I just like the idea that he's about to throw himself off the building. And then he hears, well, it's Janet.
Janet from Accounts. I think that would be a really nice little, yeah. Come off the ledge, all right. And when you've done that, I've got some forms I need you to finish.
Yes, that's starting with your expenses. A couple of other thoughts. You're using Crazy by Patsy Kline as the music. Now, that's a joke that I've seen too many times, I think, is that this lovely Patsy Kline song from the 1950s about crazy being in love.
And it's used, I think, in The Simpsons when Homer's putting the mental institution and they say, please hold while we try to connect you. Crazy. So it's kind of, I wouldn't use that. I've also, you've got a small point, but these things matter.
In the scene set in 1994, if you've got a four-year-old girl using the word gay, that's really gay and stupid. I don't think a four-year-old would use it and even if they did it, they wouldn't have been doing it. So in 1995, small points, but these are the kind of things that people look at and they go, well, that's kind of getting in the way of my enjoyment of this. So on individual bits like that, we're talking about Terrence and Shreda and everything, but I'm a Davis' little sister who's four in that first scene.
Will's little sister is slumped on Dave's lap, a thousand yards there. So I don't know why she's got a thousand yards there. It's quite a popular thing to put in scripts these ideas that people are staring off into distance and we the audience at home. We don't know what they're thinking.
So I don't know what we're meant to think, but also I wrote next to it, good luck getting that out of a four-year-old. So getting four-year-olds to act is really, really hard. And if you're going to put that into a script for a producer, he wants to produce it, he's already just thinking, oh blimey, I'm not going to have to get a four-year-old to do that, am I kidding. So that's kind of just bits and pieces.
But just to be, again, trying not to be too down on it, I do think that you have got a nice, but you can reveal those back story items through, but you have to do it through the characters that you've got. I like that as an opening, that him coming home and it really sets out what the show's going to be about. I assume. I think it sets out what the show's theme is going to be about, but the first 10 pages doesn't give you any indication of what the rest of the episodes is going to be about, because we've got a flashback scene.
We've got some characters from an office that we're never going to go back to. And there's a lot of stuff where I just think, I think after 10 pages, I still don't really know what quite the show is going to be. So would I read on? I probably would.
That's still a win. I would have read page 11 to 15. If it was more of just sort of standing around talking, I probably would have thought really at that point, but I would have read more. So that's not bad for this.
Thank you very much for sending it to us. Michael, that's really going to be. We're hoping to read quite a few more. I would say for the time being probably don't send us any of your 10 pages, but that will change hopefully by maybe, because we'll be getting it for next year.
We'll hopefully have got through quite a few more of them by then. I'm not saying anything. We must try harder. Here's a third one.
The third one is called, Oh, Habit's Written by Mark Paterson. Again, you can find a link on the Facebook page. And this is a much more knock about funny funny, as it were sitcom about set in an unery, a convent, as I believe they're also called. And you've got constant sister, constant sister, Devlin, who are sharing a cell, I think they call them.
There's two names. There's a mother's superior. There's a mother's superior. And sister Angelica comes in, mother's superior is counting lots of money.
There is some stuff going on in the cloisters. So, constant is always upbeat, very excited. And Devlin is a little bit more world-wise and weary. It's basically a female father Ted.
It's mother Ted. Mother Ted. Mother Ed Wiena. I don't know.
In fact, the opening scene is almost almost seen from Father Ted. There's sister Constance, who's the constant. And sister Devlin, who's obviously the miserable one. Devlin and they're in bed and it's just before dawn and they're talking.
And it's basically Google and Ted. And it's nice and a little bit funny as well. But there's actually, bear in mind, there isn't actually any story happening in that first scene. Also, you've got, this is a couple of, we had, I think we meet five nuns in this first ten pages.
And I think it's a short ten pages as well because I think you did a lot of double spacing. So, it feels quite short. So, we meet five characters. Remember, you've got to be watching this on TV.
So, we're going to see five similar looking women all wearing the same clothing. So, you've got to really differentiate and you have to differentiate their characters. And this is just a useful thing you could do, for instance. It's not just, and it might help you with the characters.
Maybe one of them has got a little annoying sniffle or something. And that's just little bits of colour that you can add to a script. And one of them might have a sort of, or something that they just kind of add at the end, a little tick or something. And just, because you can't quite go, I mean, as I said, I read the first scene and thought, oh right, so Devlin is Ted.
And the next scene happens and then there is a superior to Devlin. So, it's actually, there's, she's kind of one below Ted. And the mother superior is, obviously, the boss. And there's just looking for some, looking at some other ideas.
I think I'm not really getting the delineation between, for instance, the mother superior, the path of the mission of the boss and Devlin. Yeah. And so, I think we're lacking a bit of story to draw us through, you know, for some reason the mother superior has loads and loads of money. I don't buy that convents have lots of money.
And I think there is a sort of a public perception of the Catholic Church, which is secretly extremely rich. I'm not sure that means true with this particular convents. So, I think because there's sort of zero realism here, which I have to say I have no problem in the concept at all. It just means that you just have to be incredibly funny.
You have to be really big jokes that we really haven't seen before. And because it is going to invite really big comparisons to Father Ted, you have to be funnier than Father Ted, or have a particular angle that really differentiates it. And also Father Ted's really weird. There's some real weirdness in Father Ted that we're not getting here.
And that's fine. You don't have to be like Father Ted and you should try not be. But at the moment, this is just feeling like, the funny character isn't a convent talking. And there are lots of sorts of jokes that are kind of wit because we've sort of got, I think the first joke is, Carl's not saying, I was thinking and Devon says, no, there's a first.
That's not really, that's not wit. I felt like with your opening line for each of your characters, in every episode, and obviously at the beginning, the first time we see a character, we want to go, ah, right, yes, I remember that character. And you have to kind of do that again and again. Think of Kramer, think of all the creative ways that he found to enter a room.
And that's kind of level. You want every character to have something that's distinct about it. You want to see it in those sort of opening exchanges. And that felt to me, I didn't, oh, that's a first.
It just felt like a kind of, it's a throwaway thing and it was her first line, which was a shame. But I think it's fun. You can afford to be a little bit more cartoony with it. As games, as well, it's not real.
And I sort of don't mind about the money kind of thing. If these characters, I imagine that this is a cartoon, imagine it's an animation. So one of your characters is going to have really big eyes and one of them is going to go, they're just all going to be larger than life and they're all going to kind of, you've got a perfect situation. You've got these five people in this place.
There's nothing, no distractions or very few distractions. It's lovely set up to create conflict. And if you just make the characters bigger, and rude, and sort of think about James's sitcom, Blue Stone 4-2, where they're all soldiers, they're all stuck there. There's no way that you can't just say, oh, right, he's being mean to me.
I'm off. I'm going now. There's no way out. So you can afford to be really horrible to be.
They've married Jesus. They've taken that vow of God. So one of my favourite films of all time is Nuns on the Run. And I also have a song for the Pope Must Die.
So there's definitely a show here. Going back to what we were saying at the very start to round things off. The problem is that this has been done before, and so, you know, because it is Father Ted, but this script can still work for you if you turn it into a calling card, which shows the kind of comedy that you like, you like, big broad knockabout comedy, you like this kind of stuff. There's nothing like the other two scripts that we got.
So, you know, there's lots to work with here. So you need to make the script show what you can do. So at the moment there's lots to work on there. But thank you for sending it to John Mark for sending us old habits, which is actually quite a good title.
So that's our show. We have a few bits and pieces to mention. I have written this at Comfor Radio called Be Lucky, which is currently on iPlayer, and it stars Milton Jones and Joe Joyner and Ellis James. And it's on BBC Radio Wales.
The first two episodes have gone out on iPlayer. Episode three goes out this coming Saturday, which is in October 2016, by the way, if you're listening to this in some dystopian future. Also, it is the official release of a DVD of a player wrote called the God Particle, which you can now buy on DVD. So it would be great if you go to the God Particle Play.com, you'll be able to see a trailer for it, a two minute trailer, and then go off and buy it.
If that's something that is interested about some of some religion, and it basically feels a bit like it's two people who have basically stuck with each other. So that is the God Part School. Dave, I'm looking forward to watching it. And Dave, you have got some sick concours coming up?
Yes, I have. And if you are listening to this in the first three or four days, you are in time to catch the early bird at a special rate for my two days. I'm doing one day, how to make a living at comedy, and then also write a day about writing sitcoms. Again, all the details on my website, DaveCohen.org.uk or Twitter at CohenDave.
Also, I'm doing my show, which I've been doing occasionally this year. It's called Music Was My First Love, my stand up poem, which I shall be performing with John Berry. He'll be reading from his new book, and we're performing on the 10th of November. The Big Green Bookshop would green, and then we're in Chris Kappalas, 18th of November, book Cello Crow, and a book shopping clapper on the 24th of November.
So there you go. Is that one on website as well? That will possibly be fine organising after I haven't got it on there. Anyway, also, if he has a Dave's book on there too, how do we actually successfully comedy my book is called, How to Write?
Writing That Sick Com, which you can look at on my blog at sickongeek.blogspot.com. That's it. Thanks very much for listening, and we'll speak to you again soon. Cheerio.