Episode 342: Dark Island (2010)

Send us Fan MailWhat in the Uwe Boll have I just seen? As I wade through the cesspool of TUBI trying to find something decent I, for my sins and completeness, need to tick this one off.Not to be confused with Narnia Dark Island, 1962 BBC series or the Dark Island in the Thousand Islands, or the  prominent feature of the Saint Lawrence Seaway, is located in the lower (eastern) Thousand Islands region, near Chippewa Bay in St Lawrence County NY. It is another shitty movie on TUBI from 2010.When a defense contractor loses contact with its lab on a remote island, a team of soldiers and scientists is sent to learn what happened.Rotten Tomateos say Terror awaits a team of soldiers and scientists who have arrived at a bioweapons facility to determine why contact was lost with the researchers there. 8%IMDB says Soldiers and scientists visit a remote island, the site of bio-weapons research, after losing contact with the staff there. 3.3/10Leterboxd says After losing contact with its researchers on a remote island, a military corporation hires a group of scientists and soldiers to find out what went wrong.  2.7/10And none of those descriptions are technically right as a former soldier turned sulky boat owner, a scientist pretending to be a soldier, and blurring the lines, an actual soldier, a toxicologist pretending to be a medic, and a nerd head by boat to an island not dissimilar to the island in Boll's monstrous House of the Dead. Why? Well, a nasty company has been performing experiments that somehow turn people into zombies and then smoke monsters like the one in Lost. Also monster sounds like Lost. So basically a Canadian TV version of House of the Dead meets Lost. Wanna see it? I wouldn't. If anything the highlight of the movie was realising I hadn't covered REC or REC2 yet for the pod, and both are free on Amazon.3/10 don't bother