Episode 40 - Embarrassing Moments

It's really moist. Yeah. No, shit, it's gross. Welcome back to Talking On Stance.

I'm your host, Kyle, and I'm here with Christopher. Dude, so last night, right? I had one of those moments where you're just laying in bed. You're about to go to sleep, right?

You're like ready to go to sleep. And the next thing you know, your brain's like, Hey, remember that one side? Yeah, all the time. I had that last night, and I was just like, no, why?

I was literally laying there, just like, fuck, yeah, I remember that. Why'd you have to make me remember that? It was so embarrassing. It always happens to have a worst possible time.

Yeah, like right when you're about to go to sleep. Your brain just makes you remember the most embarrassing moment. I was thinking cringe for a good 15 minutes before we finally call it a night. Speaking of which, we're going to let you cringe for like a good 50 minutes or so.

Talk about our embarrassing moments. This isn't a rough episode. This is our 40th episode. Is it that?

Episode 40. Yeah, do we mean it to the big 4? No, I know. That was a long pause.

I really like that. But they won't know that because I'm going to cut that out. But yeah, dude, for you the episodes, I figured, you know, why not? Why not let our audience know how fucking embarrassing we are?

Like, fuck it. Whatever. You go first. Don't scare me.

I can't even go first. I don't know. Like, do you, what? Yeah, sure.

I was a bit younger. So I was like 14. I was going to the Philippines. And like, no, I was coming back from the Philippines, actually.

Sorry. Because like we were on a summer trip. It was like two weeks, whatever. So we're on the way back.

And then we were on the way back from Manila. We were going from Manila to Vancouver. And we were like maybe two hours, hour and a half away from Vancouver from like landing. But I decided to get some orange juice.

And like, I didn't realize this. But I didn't realize how upset it would make my stomach. So I have to orange. I take orange juice.

And I'm like, oh, this is like a worst time to shit. Like it's like an hour away from landing. Yeah, I was like, all right, let me hold it. Like, you know, it's cool.

But it's like, I figured it'd be pretty, like, it felt like a solid shit, you know? Yeah. I didn't think it'd be wet. Okay.

So I was like, okay, I can't hold it, right? Yeah. So as I get up to go use the restroom, right? But the sewer dis is there.

They're pushing down the carts collecting people's trash. I'm like, fuck, shit. Like, move it's like, I gently put my hand. I thought I was like on the upper back of the lady.

Uh-huh. Like, I was like, trying to get her to move. Like, excuse me. But so like, I'm putting my hand there.

I'm gently pressing on it. Cause I'm trying to like, like, I'm trying to shit. Yeah. And she turns out, she's like, excuse me, can you put, can you put your hand on my bottom?

And then, but as she turns around, I zoom past it. I'm like, I don't have time for you. Like you bitch. I gotta go.

It's so bad. So I go about and shit. And it's a lot of shit. Okay.

I don't think we need to do another full details about what shit it is. But okay. It was what, too, right? What a way to start this episode.

Okay. Yeah. It's embarrassing, man. I'm making mess.

I'm like, okay. What? What? I'm like, man, what do I do?

I gotta clean my ship, right? Yeah. You don't come and hurt yourself. How do you, what do you mean you made a vest?

Did you not, did you miss the toilet? No. Yeah. Like it was just so bad that it was so bad.

I didn't get to sit down. Like I had to like go. Oh shit. It was really bad.

You have time to put a cover on? No. You know, you just went straight on. I was like, it was bad.

Cause I was either, is either if I held on for a few seconds. Orange juice did this to you. Yeah. Where are you?

Orange and Colorado or something? I'm playing the bolt. But if I held on to that shit though, I would have, I would have definitely like shit. I can't.

Right. Like it was so bad though. Like. So you missed the toilet?

Yeah. Or it was like just come out. I just come out. I missed toilet.

I missed toilet. But um, so yeah, like a shit. I make a mess, right? So much shit gets my boxers, right?

Fuck man. It's a worst trip ever. So I ditch my boxers. I throw it away.

Right. And I'm trying to clean up like the fucking shit. You throw your boxes away. Yeah.

Cause it's messy. I was like, I ain't gonna sit in that for like two hours. Just like. I really did.

Okay. So then. That's not the first time I shipped myself. Anyway, that's the different story.

Anyway, yeah. So my dad knocks like, you know, like, he's like, everything kind of like, yeah, yeah. He's like, all right. Cause there's like hell people.

I'm like, I'm like. Oh, brings the animal. Yeah. So yeah, I go.

So I clean it. I clean it up. Oh, I'm sorry. Just real quick though.

Like for people that don't know your dad. I can just imagine your dad. So it does that. He's loud.

Okay. And he doesn't care that he's loud. So I can literally imagine your dad just knocking on their just. Son.

Honestly, what happened? I can feel myself like get blood red. Yeah. So yeah, like I just, I just my box here is like, I clean up the toilet as best I can.

I just do my head down. I don't look at me like, but yeah, I should stop playing. That was the whole. That's the.

It's very embarrassing. I mean, at least people didn't know you shit your pants. No, because you got rid of the evidence. I hope so.

But I guess I felt embarrassed because like I brought, I was bringing down my like carry on with me. That's like, why, why are you bringing down to carry on? Cause it's a layover, right? Yeah.

Yeah. I was like, I just need to go do something. And he's like, ask me like, hell, I was like, like, did something happen in the bathroom? Like, oh, yeah.

So, yeah, so. No, dad God. God damn it. Yeah.

Yeah. I should myself on a plane. But it's pretty embarrassing. If I felt embarrassed, I felt.

Yeah. That is pretty embarrassing. Well, I mean, I'm not that embarrassed or I mean, I don't have that bad embarrassing story. So continue on.

Um, next. Yeah. Damn. I mean, I'm sure everybody had like, yeah, everybody should themselves.

I'm not my embarrassing story though. I'm not going to tell that one. Why not? Cause you just, I'm not going to continue with this fucking podcast with like shit stories.

No, literally and figuratively. But, um, damn, no. So there was this one time, I can't think of any right now, honestly. They're all, I black them all out.

Um, dang. I don't want to ask any questions, bro. So I think where a lot of embarrassing moments happen is whenever you interact with someone, like you ever do anything on a day or like relationship wise, you might have like said the wrong girl's name. I don't know if that's embarrassing.

I feel like it's more incriminating. It's both embarrassing and incriminating. But, um, okay. So, so my current girlfriend right now, right, on our first date, she, so we went to eat Thai food, right?

Cause we're talking about Thai food. Yeah. So like, oh, let's go have Thai food for our first day. Okay.

Yeah, for sure, right? But that wasn't the embarrassing moment. So we're eating Thai food and like literally we're like done and she's like, oh, let's go get dessert. I'm like, what do you want?

She's like, I don't know what ever like ice cream. I'm like, sure. So I'm like, looking at places and I notice there's a backing robin. It's like down the street from the Thai place that we're at, right?

Oh, you want to go there? We could just walk it. And then she literally asks me a question while we're walking. And like, whole time I'm feeling like we just had Thai food, right?

It's not, it's not gas out of the, you know, downstairs. Gas coming up there, right? And I'm feeling it coming. I'm like, oh God, oh, don't, yeah.

I'm like, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, don't, right? And like, I could have simply done like a little, you know, yeah, I tried to wait, but my dumb ass was like looking straight at her and she asked me a question while this is all happening. I'm like, Kyle, I'm staring at her, right? And I'm just thinking, Kyle, hold it in.

I'm like, she goes, so like, tell me about blah blah blah. I'm like, oh yeah, you know this, that next, you know, the fucking burp comes out, like, right in her face. We're looking right at her and like, this is how I knew, oh, this girl's the one because literally I wasn't so fucking embarrassed by her. I'm like, oh my God, I'm so sorry.

And she goes, all she does is she takes a step back, puts her hand on her chest like, excuse me, but last year we back comfortable now. So like, little, little, little, split, drop it down, but you know, like, what off is cool. She's, yeah, it's like, well, she's funny. So I was like, yeah, I thought we on that level.

And then I was like, oh, I thought we on that level. She's like, I mean, I guess, yeah, because say, right? I was like, well, literally, like, I'm back, man, I'm like, you fucking dumbass. That's it.

It's over. Don't read. Don't read. Don't read.

She's gonna go to me. Yeah, but, yeah, a couple weeks later. You're now with us, barking someone's face. That's, that's it.

I literally, so I told, I told Peter this story, right? I'm like, dude, so this girl on day right now, like check Pete this, bro. This is how cool she is. So I told that story, right?

He's like Kyle coming in with a good game play, man. Sometimes you just gotta test the waters. You know, I guess see how cool they are. They can't enjoy the burp.

They're not the one. I'm like, you're totally right, dude. The fact that she enjoyed it, like, proves, he's like, I see you, bro. The plan.

It's like the small things to you like that, where you can have like an inside joke. That's telephone. Like that. Dude, literally, ever since then, that's all she says, like, whenever, not if I do something wrong, but I'm just like, hey, you want to like hang out today?

She's like, I don't know. You can't burn my face again. I'm like, yeah. Like, she's still bringing it up.

I'm like, okay. It's like that cool. She hasn't done anything embarrassing yet. That's how it always is though, man.

It's always the guy that fucks up. Yeah, you gotta like, control the relationship. There was another moment that like, was embarrassing, but I'll talk about that later. Let's go back to you.

I don't want to talk about myself anymore. What about, did you have any like, experiences like that? Like, on first eight or something, any embarrassing moments with girls? Guys, whatever your preference?

You know, I mean, ten seconds, whatever, just trust interest, honestly. Dogs, cats, whatever gives me attention. You know, love is low. True.

No. So, uh, I did go on a date once. I was like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, I'm like, if I want to go see a movie, right? In warmer but In high school I had chronic nosebleeds.

Oh, yeah. Like, I would bleed in the middle of the day or like during class period and I'd often have to go to the nurses to get my face cleaned up because I looked like I fucked up. And so we went on a woman to the movie theater and was like, it's still air conditioned, but I think it was just so hot that like right before you walked in or whatever. So during the movies my nose started bleeding.

Yeah. Did you feel that? I mean, I felt like a little, just a little moist. I was like, I wipe it.

It was like, it's kind of dark in the theater. Is that blood? No, whatever. So like, I grabbed a little tissue and I'm like, I'm like, this, right?

You're covering everything? Yeah. And we're talking, we're talking, having a guitar, not throughout the movie, but we're having a guitar. But I can tell as a movie progresses and it's happened near the beginning of the movie, I can tell my nose is like, driven.

It's like bleeding bad. So I'm like, oh, sorry, excuse me, hold on. So I excuse myself, I go back. My face is all bloody, like up here.

And like, um, because the whole time I had the tissue like up there and my pull it away is all like, fucking blood. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's terrible. And strings with the fuck.

It was a lot. It was a lot. Okay. And so like, all right, I throw that away, clean my face up.

I'm like, I keep bleeding. Like it's not soft. Yeah. So like, what do I do?

I was like, whoa, I do the whole, like, I roll up to like, like tissue and like, I stick up my nose, right? I don't actually, like just dangling out my nose. Right. So like, I rip off like a couple pieces and I'm turning them to balls.

I'm putting my nose, right? Okay. So like, I'm stuck in it in there, you know, like, I hope we all just clog that shit up and it'll like resolve itself. And so I go back, right?

It's not like my nostrils kind of big. It was like, you wouldn't really notice unless like you knew. So I had so we're in the theater. Yeah, it sneeze.

I can already see where this is going, but okay. And it sneezed real bad. Like, I'm like fighting it. Like, how are you breathing?

Are you just like, like, do your mouth all the time? You're like, are you breathing like really, like really heavily? And if I recall correctly, I think we sent it. We went and saw a movie, The Crazies.

Okay. And it was like some zombie like. Yeah, whatever. It's like, oh yeah, I'm just really scared.

Okay. And then, and so I'm feeling the sneeze, right? And so I'm fighting it and fighting it. And luckily, like, like on screen, there's like some action sequence and there's a big explosion.

And I sneeze right then and I boom, fine. But like, I'll touch it in my mouth. You mean in your hands? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

My hands. I'm like, I'm like, I'm sure. Like, I'm worried about pull away. Yeah.

It's gonna have like bloody and shit, right? So like, I'm like, oh, sorry. I excuse myself again. And it's obviously really bloody.

Yeah. And like, this girl's probably thinking like this motherfucker's probably watching another movie with a girl right now and just going in between theaters. I would rather take in that than what I did. Okay.

So I cleaned up and for whatever reason, like, I don't know if she knew what I felt so like embarrassed. Like I text her from the bathroom like, oh, I got a family emergency. I have to go home and I call my dad to pick me up. You should have left her.

Yeah. I was like, I was so, I don't know why I felt super embarrassed about it. Right. But I think because it kept happening and it kept like, excuse me.

So like in those, in that moment then, like when you were embarrassed while she was there, when your dad picked you up, were you still feeling embarrassed? Like, how do you like get over that embarrassment? Did you like laugh? I mean, now obviously you can laugh it off.

Like back then where you were just like, my life's ruined. Yeah. Like, I did your typical like, anime like rolled around the floor and said like, I felt sleep. Stupid.

Like, I felt so embarrassed. I don't know if it was like. Did you ever see the girl after? No.

Oh, that was it. No, I was like, damn you ruined it. Well, I mean, yeah, yeah. Yeah.

Did you ever like hit you back up like, yo, let's watch another movie. No, I honestly think she moved. Damn, it was that bad. Yeah.

Yeah. Guys, I can't deal with it. No. I don't know if she moved or if she might have like just done her class and switched her over.

But like, I never like noticed her after that. Damn. Yeah. I think I subconsciously like was so embarrassed.

I blocked her out of my memory bank. I mean, that's usually what happens, right? When you get like embarrassed so badly, you just block it out as much as you get. I wish.

Except for those random nights where your brain reminds you. Yeah. But I mean, for the most part, you block it out. Yeah.

Like, so there's this one time when I was a kid. I don't even know if I'll tell the story on here. I told my girlfriend the story and she starts blessing the life. She's like, I can't believe you did that.

I'm like, I know. And I told her too. I'm like, yeah, every playing I'm doing an embarrassing like moments on her podcast. She's like, are you going to tell that story?

I'm like, no, that's too much. That's all you're going to get. No, I'll tell it. So.

It's so fucking embarrassing. I haven't. I haven't. No, you haven't.

I blocked it out. But you know what? For the sake of our 40th episode, you guys are going to get to hear it. It's bad.

It's bad. It's bad. So as a kid, right, I used to live in like a cul-de-sac like court, right? Yeah, in Tracy, right?

Yeah. Yeah. So I was growing up, you know, a lot of the kids would play outside because we had fucking lives, right? Unlike today's generation, where they're just all on the phones and shit.

But yeah, so me and my brother used to always play outside with a neighborhood kid. So there's a lot of us, right? So we were all playing. We would do like random shit.

Like one day, I think we were just like pretending that we were all cavemen or some shit, right? I was like probably maybe six or seven years old. Okay. So I was pretty young, old enough to know what I was doing.

But like, still young, right? Yeah. And so we're pretending we're like cavemen. I think we capture like one of the kids.

Like they were like, like, our meet or like our capture, right? And like we threw them up. I don't think it's like an electricity grid, but they have like that green thing that like sits in a neighborhood. There's actually one right outside of it that I'll show you later.

But there's like this little green box that was like in our neighborhood. Yeah. It's covering something. I don't know what it is, but there's stuff in there.

Yeah. It's pretty much like in a electrical box, right? Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. So we throw them on that thing because we're pretending that's the fire, right? And we're like going back and cooking them. So we're like cooking them, right?

No. So we're like cooking them, right? And we're going back and forth. Oh, I'm going to eat this arm, right?

Like we're saying we're doing it. We're grabbing it, right? We're going back and forth. We're doing it.

We're going back and forth. We're doing it. We're doing it. Oh, I'm going to eat this ear.

I'm going to eat this nose, right? Okay. So mine's a mess. And this is the embarrassing part too.

Shut up. This is the embarrassing part too because what I said, if you guys can't tell by now what I'm going for, what I said wasn't an English word. I didn't say it in the English word. I said it in our native language for whatever fucking reason, right?

Basically, long story short, I said I'm a grab his dick. But I said it in our language, right? You're not kidding. I don't know.

No, so I was like, oh, I'll grab his, whatever, right? And I realized what I did because honestly I'm reaching for it. Oh, wait. And then everyone should have stopped.

Like, look at me. Everyone should have stopped and looked at me and they're like, what? And my brother was like, you know what? We're going to go.

I think our mom's calling us. And I'm just walking back. I'm just looking down. What did I just do?

And my brother was like, what the fuck? I'm like, I don't know. I'll just go back inside. And it was just like, oh, so embarrassing dude.

This guy's physically crying right now. I can't really say that story. How much shit was bad? I'm going to show this up on a plane.

You didn't grab some guys dick. But yeah, I didn't grab it. OK, I realized what I was doing in my stocks. Yeah, midway because everyone looked at me.

I was like, never mind. I'm not going to do that. I'm not going to do that. Yeah, it was pretty embarrassing.

And I blocked it out. Ever since now. Oh, man. So what else have you done, Chris?

Oh my God. Yeah, it was pretty bad dude. It was pretty bad. I think it's so funny.

Is this because I imagine you like smiling, having a guitar? I was having fun. Yeah, it was fun. It was just a fan.

It really was. It was embarrassing dude. You guys are lucky you heard that here first. OK?

Oh, God. I think we get an episode there. Thanks for listening guys. I'm going to listen to this episode before you get married.

I'm going to tell that during my wedding. Don't fucking tell that during my wedding. No, please don't. I'm pretty sure my future wife is probably going to know about this.

And she's going to play the clip anyways. So you don't have to. You're right. Yeah, it was pretty bad.

You never done any stupid shit as a kid? Any embarrassing things like that? Not as embarrassing as that. You did.

I mean, I've never done anything like that. I mean, I've never done anything like that. Not as embarrassing as that. You did.

I mean, I've done stupid stuff as a kid. So like one was like J-Walking, right? Obviously you don't do it. It's illegal.

Technically. I mean, it's illegal, right? I only thought J-Walking meant walking in a J. And my show was embarrassing, but that's just plain stupid.

No, I'm okay. So I was like, what's the worst part? So I also thought drinking, they're like, oh, don't drink and drive. My dad drinks and drives all the time.

Yeah, so let me grab some water and then I'll see if the cops will come in and rest for me, whatever reason. So I go outside for like an hour, hour and a half and I'm just walking in J's and sitting on water. But it's drinking drive, not drinking walking, come at us. But like, to me, it was like the same, you know, I'm dumb.

How old were you? I was like, five or six. Okay. And like, I'm out there, fucking hour.

I don't have, I don't have, I don't have, I'm in the main street just walking in J's. On the sidewalk, like in the street. No, on the sidewalk. Just like, just making J.

I use a badgie. Like, okay, come on, Chris. One, two, three, J's, which way, this way, this way. Honestly, and I'm out there like, I don't have to, and I'm like, violently drinking with water throwing my head back.

Like, hell, trying to get people like, call the cops on the street. Why are you even trying to get it called on? I don't know. Damn, you're your own snitch, bro.

Honestly, I remember just being outside for like an hour and a half, like, or two hours. And it's hot. And then like, no bleeding and shit. Just dripping fucking murder.

You don't have to sidewalk. Yeah, that was embarrassing. That was awesome. That thing happened.

Nothing happened. Were your neighbors like looking at you like, what the fuck is wrong with this kid? I honestly think so. Because like, you remember, I don't know if you remember where I used to live back in Canada.

Oh, back in, yeah, yeah, yeah. It was a whole residential area. No, weren't you in a corner house? No, I was like, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I was like, yeah, yeah, yeah. You're like on the street. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I remember doing that for so long.

And then it was like mid day, it was hot. And like, for whatever reason, I got upset. I remember being upset. I remember being upset.

No one had called the cops. I was like, I was like upset. I came home and I was like, give him a moment. I was like, I had to.

Just because you didn't get caught. I got a couple of funny. That's how stupid. Yeah, that's how stupid.

But it's all funny. You literally got a jaywalking in a jay. Actually, why is it called jaywalking? I don't know.

It's a good, very deep question. Guys, if you know, let us know. We're pretty stupid. No, don't ask Google.

Like, stop you when you're a fucking Google phone now that you ruin the whole group vibro. Like, we literally all have iPhones and now we can't text you because it's green. It's this nasty green color. Hey, that shit.

But anyways, yeah, so that happened when I was a kid. It was pretty bad. Oh, I do have something like that. So you like it?

Maybe. You all right there, bro? Yeah, no. Joking on your blood or what?

Yeah. No, so this, it was high school. It was high school. High school sucks.

Yeah, go ahead. And for whatever reason, I had friends over and my parents were, oh, my parents were cool with us drinking. Okay. We were like, underaged.

But we weren't drinking. We're not promoting that by the way. Yeah, by no means. But we weren't drinking anything cool either.

We're just drinking those like, uh, mic's hard. Yeah, like those pre-made, like, it was even like alcohol. Yeah, it's pretty much so, but we were like weaklings. And so we were drinking that.

And this was high school? Yeah, it was high school. And I remember, I was wearing shorts. And then like, you know, we're all having guitar friends and I are laughing.

My mom comes out and I don't think she's like, like, to yell at us. But she's like, she just wants to join in. She's talking to us having guitar. She's laughing.

And then for whatever reason, like, I guess, uh, and also, I'm not so relatively skilled. I'm also relatively skinnier than me now. Okay. And so pretty much what happens is my shorts fall.

And all my friends, right? Wait, you guys are all, I'm sorry. I missed the part where we are sitting or you guys standing? I think we were standing.

I mean, obviously I was in my shorts, Bill. Right. Okay. Well, like, I forgot the exact, like, situational, like, what's going on?

But I remember my shorts falling. Oh. And so I found a work box of reease. Right.

And but they're like really tight. Okay. So you can see the bold, right? And I like, I grabbed my shorts, right?

Something from Bond, but that was kind of like halfway down. They're all right halfway down. Right. Well, they know what notices yet, but my mom, how it starts laughing and pointing at me.

Yeah. She starts pointing at me and then all my friends, like, turn and they start laughing at me and fucking pull my pants up. That's it. That's embarrassing.

I mean, it's embarrassing, but it's not like grabbing somebody's dick. I don't think I can, I don't think I can, I don't think I can, I don't think I mean, I actually thought my shit story would be like the story. Yeah. No.

I got another one too. That's pretty bad. No. No.

No. No, no, just some stupid shit, but we'll get to that later too. So what about like relationship wise, do you ever do anything stupid in front of your girlfriend or sniffing it out or something? Yeah.

Okay. So, you know, the full dates situation, right? And we're up again watching the movie and obviously this happened. That's like your go to date, huh?

Yeah. Dinner in the movie. It's my bread butter. It's every time.

I mean, I guess. Oh, like, you know, my hand during the day. Oh, hell yeah. You know, like, you know, I being all combination.

And so. At the day in the movie, she like she throws her hand. She throws her hand down, right? Yeah.

Like, by the side. Okay. Cool. That's not.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

I told her, but you're gonna have to give me a sign. I literally said this to her. I got to go. I don't spend the game and be like, but yeah.

You got to let me know. I didn't. I didn't. I didn't.

I didn't. I didn't. I went through one of those. I didn't.

I went through. All right. Yeah. I got to get inside.

I got to get inside. I got to get inside. Right. Yeah.

Yeah. I got to go. Right. I got to go.

Go. I got to go. Go for it. My hands.

Right. Right. Right. I don't immediately grab it because I feel like.

Right. I do the whole. Touch. I'm like, oh my, I'm like, right?

She goes down again, right? Like, maybe she wasn't ready, maybe she wasn't feeling it yet. You know, I was like, let me go for it again. Same thing, one hop this time, two hop this time.

Gings it away, all right, whatever, I give up, right? So throughout the movie, our arms are constantly going up and down, because we're trying to get each other. Like she does want me to hold her hand, right? And so what happens though is the most embarrassing thing, at least for me, other than me, like Bailing to hold her hand, was both our hands go down at the same exact time.

But hers goes down naturally, right? But mom was like, I was like a fucking karate chop. I was like, it was hella obvious that I went for it. That was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I fucking karate chop.

I was like, it was hella obvious that I went for it. Yeah. That was like, I was like, I was like, I was like, I just stayed that way. So you never held your hand?

No. He's out of self-marist. Oh my god, dude. He's out of like six to 10th and I was like, fuck it.