Episode 497: Patronizing perf reviews and can't get anything done as a tech lead episode artwork

EPISODE · Jan 26, 2026 · 27 MIN

Episode 497: Patronizing perf reviews and can't get anything done as a tech lead

from Soft Skills Engineering · host Jamison Dance and Dave Smith

In this episode, Dave and Jamison answer these questions: I’m a relatively new people manager and I really struggle when it comes time for performance reviews, or even regular praise or critical feedback in one-on-ones, because I can’t help feeling like an adult “talking down” to another adult, regardless of whether the feedback is generally positive or critical and instructive. Something about it all seems so patronizing to me. How can I approach this stuff with a different mindset? Hello D & J! Quick one from your biggest fan!! This week (Tuesday 6th Jan 2k26) I was promoted to Tech Lead of our team. In my new role, I have done no work *cries*, I’ve spent all my time assisting team members, unblocking QA, dealing with ad hoc requests from product/stakeholders…. I asked the previous tech lead is this what they did? They did! And they said spent their personal time to complete stories assigned to them. Is this really what a tech lead does?!?!! Helpppp

Episode metadata supplied by the publisher feed · Published Jan 26, 2026

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Episode 497: Patronizing perf reviews and can't get anything done as a tech lead

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XXX Tech - A New Beginning

Feb 1, 2025 ·168m

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