Episode 86: A MAGA Uncle Sam Gets Arrested For ‘Raising His Flag’ At The Great American State Fair, 20% Of Americans Are Bailing On America’s 250th, Birthright Citizenship Survives SCOTUS Illiteracy, Helen Keller Isn’t Real, Alex Jones Can Suck It, Killer Crocs, and more

A MAGA Uncle Sam gets arrested for ‘raising his flag’ at the Great American State Fair. 20% of Americans are bailing on America’s 250 Independence Day. SCOTUS upholds birthright citizenship but the cult of the Unitary Executive screws us in other ways. Which zodiac signs are bad in bed? Elon Musk may not have the world’s smallest penis, but he is still jealous of someone else’s philanthropy. Digital birth control. Totally free Texas students must read the Bible whether they like it or not. A transphobic influencer doesn’t believe in Helen Keller. Bill Maher is too smug to be liberal. “Be Good” with your commemorative Donald Trump passport. The Board of Peace will have legal immunity because…? The Onion is relaunching InfoWars this week and will be giving merch money to Sandy Hook families. Suck it, Alex Jones. A man gets a big payout for playing ominous Star Wars music at Donald Trump’s military goons. Pete Buttigieg is targeted by an anonymous jerk. Americans can’t be unpolarized. Garlic may prevent mosquitoes from mating. And humans, too. E. Jean Carroll gets a defamation payout because Donald Trump can’t keep his mouth shut. Watch for killer crocs. And so much more.