Hello and welcome to the Get to Life Podcast where we have conversations about organ tissue and ideonation and transplantation. You can always find us at thegiftedlife.org. I'm Lori Steele. I'm Joey Boudreau.
And Nala Schwab. Hello. I'm back. She's back.
She's back. Welcome. I'm glad to be back with you all. Yeah.
She serves as Lopez Family Services Coordinator. Brings a lot to the podcast. We appreciate you listening and participating. I'm learning so much being with you all.
You're such a skilled professional. I mean, we throw her in last time and she just poof. It was organic. Great mentors.
Great mentors. We like working with you. Here's what's coming up on the podcast today everyone. We'll be talking about equity, diversity and inclusion and the role it's played and the role it will play in the donation and transplantation process.
And I'm going to be talking about the resistance to change. We all feel it. Sometimes you have that comfortable moment and then other times that discomfort. That's what we're going to be talking about.
I'm nervous. All that and more coming up right here, thegiftedlife.org. Here on the Get to Life podcast, we are so excited to have Diane Jackson in the studio. It's been a while since we've had a guest in the studio.
Welcome. Thank you. I'm so excited to be here. Yeah, she is with the Sloan group.
Joe, you know all about that? Yes, I do. So we recognize at Lopa the executive team quite a few months back that we have been working with and needed to add more at a program basically of equity, diversity and inclusion to Lopa and basically to the foundation of Lopa and commit from the ground up in the program. And we recognize part of the reason is we want to have as much diversity in thought, in action for our strategies moving forward as an agency so that we can best address from every angle all the issues that arise at Lopa.
So, of course, I'm only knowing it from the executive team aspect and I know that Kelly Ranimar, our CEO and Chrissy Hagen, our chief administrative officer, our CEO, were researching. And then next thing I know, they said, oh my God, I found it. I found it. Of course, both of them, you know, the team.
And they found the Sloan group and they had spoken to Diane and had nothing but glowing things to say. So, so without further ado, I'll go ahead and kick it off. That's quite the intro, Diane. It was, but it was great.
It was, it was so enthused. And so I would like to get your take on, you know, first, how did you come to find out about Lopa and then, and then those first kind of conversations? Definitely. Well, we came to know that you all were in the market, if you will, for some consultants or training, training and development, IE facilitators that do diversity, equity, inclusion work is actually, we got hit up on Facebook.
That's how it happened. The power of checking those inboxes, right? And it's like one of those things that, you know, you have a page and you know, to check it intuitively, but no one's going to reach out. And you all, we actually start this conversation, I believe, back in November 2020.
So this relationship, I like to call it a slow dance. This relationship has, has been kind of, you know, essentially all invited us to dance. Do you like the song? Yes or no?
No. So I think the biggie hills actually hit us up, if you will, again, shout out to Facebook on Facebook and say, hey, you know, I've had some interactions with you all. I've heard of you. You know, are you interested?
And then that's how we got to the executive team. So we're very grateful and thankful, especially in the timeframe in which Lopa approached us. It is very easy as an organization to say, hey, you know, we're going to put a diversity statement out. We're going to say these things because we know that it's the right thing to say, but actually what you all are doing through your equity, diversity, diversity and inclusion, training and task force is you're saying we're going to hardwire and bake it into our culture.
Yeah. So I actually wear my boss, Mr. Ronnie Sloan, who's the president and owner of the Sloan Group and myself coming to play is that we get to be a part of the awesome work that you all are already doing and layering into what the great work that you're doing, diversity and inclusion, specifically with a lens of equity, as I like to say. So can you tell us a little bit about the Sloan Group, how you guys got started and what got you where you are today?
Sure. We actually got started in January 2005, Katrina hit August 2005. I was actually still in college, so I was not with the organization yet. And Ronnie and I have a pretty fun connection as to how I came to the organization.
We were going to do recruitment and hiring and kind of let that be the bread and butter of the organization. And we switched gears. We had to pivot naturally, as everyone did post-Katrina, to survive as an organization. So we've been kicking, if you will, since then.
And I actually just made my anniversary of, I believe, 12 years of being with the Sloan Group. Yeah, thanks for writing. Another social media outlet that lets you know how long you've been doing the same thing. So that's how we came to be.
And this is probably our favorite line of work, diversity, equity, inclusion and having the conversations. And I think these are conversations that we don't have regularly because we've been taught in all facets of life, that these are not things that you talk about. You don't bring it up in front of polite company. Right?
Because it usually goes to a place that is very hostile. Right. So we just don't talk about it. So what is it that you do?
I know here we've been in focus groups, we have trainings coming up. But if someone out there is listening and liking what I'm hearing, what is it that you go into and do? Okay. So actually, my sweet spot, if you will, my contribution to the team is that I'm HR certified.
So when we talk about diversity, equity, inclusion, it's like let's start from the most basic form of an organization, which is typically your handbook and your policies and procedures. Are those equitable? Are those inclusive as far as the conversation? And we just started that work with your organization, which I'm so excited about because again, it's very easy as an organization to just say, hey, this is, you know, we just want to put a statement out.
We just want to say this is what we're about, but we don't want to actually do the difficult or heavy lifting of making sure that it's connected all the way around. Looks good on paper, but there's no substance behind it. So then, right. So then in a year or two, it kind of just withers away.
It's a good paint job that starts to chip in a few years. Exactly. Right. And so something that that stumbles me when you say EDI, so I was just equity, diversity, inclusion, equity versus equality.
So you see it in different places. So what's right and why is one better than the other? And, you know, and Joey, how did we get to where we are at LOPA? Equality.
And we used to use those interchangeably and they are two very different things. Equality is about saying, hey, everyone has a fair chance, if you will. And I actually should probably take out the word fair. Everyone has a chance.
The best example I can give is everyone can go to college. In theory, yes, everyone can go to college, but do they have the tools and resources up front from a foundational standpoint to actually be able to actually go for that goal of going to a four year, two year endeavor, even in apprenticeship. And a lot of times, no, because we all need different things. So equality is about just giving you, I gave you access.
Equity is about to give you the right access. What are the tools and resources that you need to be successful? And then giving you that specifically so that you can move forward with your vision and dreams, if you will. It's funny, you bring that up and that conversation actually took place.
So I'm, of course, you know, I'm the chief clinical officer with LOPA, I've been that position for a while and I take part in policy development industry-wide, you know, for UNOS and everything else, so the bigger policies. And we weigh in to Atlanta, of course, up until it's last year or so with COVID. But I go, we go to Atlanta, what happens is representatives from each of the members of UNOS, whether it's transplant centers or organ recovery agencies, OPLs like us. And that kind of rear its head back in, I guess, 2012, 2013 in the kidney policy.
So there was a recognition that there was equality in kidney allocation in that, you know, so everyone had a potential that matter your ethnicity or culture race ethnicity background to get access to a kidney. But what happened was the way the list was operated, the policy behind the list wasn't equitable. And so, and what I mean by that is it was a very simple change that completely, you know, turned it around. Prior to 2014, if you were on the waiting list, that time that you were actually put on the waiting list for a kidney was where your time started accruing.
And with kidney allocation, that's the important date. It's how much, how long have you been on the list? Because it's not like liver and kidneys, I mean, in hearts and things where they have scoring. This is about time on the list.
Well, they recognize back then, some, especially minorities, where not, minorities, especially African Americans in this situation, who already have higher incidence of hypertension, higher incidence of diabetes, and with that comes higher incidence of end stage renal disease. So with all this, you weren't seeing as many African Americans getting to the top of the list as fast. So they recognize just by changing it from the time on the waiting list to starting their cruel time at the time of dialysis, which is not something that can be finagled, which isn't something that is dependent on someone referring or anything. It's, you're that sick now, you've got to be on dialysis.
And that kind of seismic change in the policy completely changed the kidney allocation to from equality, so to speak to an equity piece. So that's, I'm just, you know, has a huge change policy while there's a lot of policy change that still needs to be improved, that still needs to be constantly, you know, looked at, evaluated from every aspect. But that was one of those things when we talked about equity and equality. It's interesting because we were having those conversations in 2012 and 2013 in Atlanta about kidney access.
And you're learning more and more about LOPA, more and more about organ donation transplantation. So can we ask what you thought about donation before you got to know us and where you are with donation now yourself? Well, you know, when you get a driver's license and I'm actually from Texas, they do ask you, like, would you like to be an organ donor? And I said, sure, you know, I just wanted to make sure I got my license, right?
It was me who were there. And I barely passed that test, but we've come a long way. And, and I have a twin sister full disclosure. And she also said, yes, I want to donate my organs, but as we got older and, you know, you re up and you redo your license, I realized that it was no longer there.
And I don't even remember why I don't know if he's because I went from Texas to Louisiana for college, but it wasn't there. And it wasn't until recently when I lost a very good family friend to COVID as many have lost and he actually had was on dialysis and kind of starting to have those conversations again. And my family has them pretty regularly about, you know, what are our wishes once we transition from this life to the next, whatever that may be. And I remember asking my family members, like, Hey, what do you think about organ donation?
And it was like, Nope, it's a hard no. I want to be married as my mom says with all my parts. I don't even know what that means, but I want to be buried with all my parts. And I had to deal with my own prejudice and biases about organ donation before I could say, Yes, I'm going to sign up again.
And it was actually being on a call with you all that I was like, you know what, I don't think I'm registered anymore. So as we're on our, I was at Google meet Google meet call. I go and look, right? I look at my license and I'm like, I'm, they're clients of ours and I'm not an organ donor, but I believe in their mission and vision.
I need to really back what I say, I believe. So as we were meeting, I started filling out the information again. And I was like, Okay, officially organ donor again. How exciting is that?
And even continuing to talk to my family members because there are just so many things that we come up against. So I said, you know, are you an organ donor and ask a family member? And they're like, Yeah, I was. And I said, Well, are you now?
No, I said, would you like to sign up? Yeah, sure. I'll sign up. I said, here's the website, right?
Yeah, I want it to like walk them through the process. I like that call to action. I'll do it later. Why can't we do it?
Yeah, right? Easy and it's quick. Yeah. And I think that's a large part of it is just kind of dismantling the myths that we have carried within us and we talk about in our EDI training with you all diversity is about the care's or risks you're born with, the experiences you've had and the choices that you've made.
And those experiences are so important because if you come from a history of we're not giving anything away, whatever it is, whether it's organs or it's tissue, as a result, you have generations of folks that are not well versed or understanding what does organ donation really mean and how can the end of your physical life be the beginning of someone else's life on earth, that continuation and starting to have those conversations has been very interesting as a good friend of mine actually told me yesterday and prep for this conversation. That's such a morbid topic. And I'm like, it is, it doesn't feel like it. Okay, so you talk about a morbid conversation and what's so interesting is I sat in on y'all's, your EDI training and it was so y'all made the discussion so natural and comfortable for all of us in the room, even though there was hesitancy to speak up.
And you're doing that right now in this conversation. You're just making it very comfortable to talk about. And you know, when we go in to talk to families about donation and again, it can be such a difficult conversation. So do you have any tips on how you have these conversations or how to open up conversation?
Oh, so interesting. Because conversation is a journey, it's kind of like inviting that person or that group of people and that family on the journey with you and giving folks an opportunity, as I like to say, to opt out, particularly with the DEI, diversity, equity and inclusion conversation it is just people have such a visceral reaction to the conversation. Very similar when we talk about our loved ones and what's going to happen to them and as a transition from this life to the next. I believe that it's so important to just start the conversation and then be aware of all of those cues, whether it's verbal or nonverbal that folks are giving and honoring people where they're at and where their mindsets are at because it is not our job to necessarily change their minds.
It is our job to bring awareness and the hope that that awareness comes with a heart change and then behavior change eventually. Yes, yes. I mean, that's so helpful to hear that. And you know, we see when we go talk to families, we're talking to different cultures, different race, different, I mean, you name it, it's just you don't know what you're walking into in the situation and then you have this family in front of you.
And then so to be able to really, like you said, to invite them on the journey with you. The opt in out, the opt out thing is very cool. Yeah, I'm very big fan of it. And it's about having cultural competency, having those skills.
And it is, I know some definitions out there say it's a mastering of some skills. You never master getting to know someone personally. So we can have a shell of this is historically and how data shows of how a certain culture reacts in this situation. It doesn't mean that that's how that family or that individual is going to react and being flexible and being agile in mindset that we can essentially pivot in the middle of that conversation.
If we realize, oh, no, that is very different than what I've encountered before. And I think it has to go back to our and we talk about it in our training, our cultural filters. Again, the characteristics were born with the experiences we've had and the choices that we've made, all of that is layered on top of a really difficult conversation, whether it's organ donation or it's diversity and inclusion. And you know, you take that top, those topics and then you add grief to that.
Yes. And it becomes very, very difficult. So in experiences, my experience is talking to families in the hospital face to face, families respond differently to grief. And I've had a family that just fell to the floor and it was so different for me because I'm used to being very reserved with how I express my grief.
So that can be uncertain. Yeah. And it feels so just uncomfortable as we as human beings, if it's we encounter something that we've never seen before, our first instinct is let's go back into our shell. And I think kind of being able to, and you know this because of your background being willing to just kind of mentally sit with people in that moment and grief is unpredictable.
And we have a lot of research, according to the books that I read on occasion, or at least the Cliff Notes, right? I'm dating myself with notes that tells us this is how people typically respond in grief. That is still just as diverse and unique as you know, our eye color and our hair color and even our fingerprints. It is specific to us and our families.
And I think you all do a wonderful job of being cognizant of that. You talk about, you know, cultural competency and it brings me back. You know, I just have a couple of points in this first, you know, so we also learn in, you know, with your training and I brought in someone else for a similar kind of cultural competency training and she talked a lot about cultural humility and being willing and open to learn about understanding that your own culture isn't superior just because that's what you've always known and being willing to learn that person and that person's culture and that person within the moment at that time, how important that was because even if you see someone based on a race or ethnicity or a culture, you still have to learn that person's, you mentioned the family, you talked about that and that was why I brought this to my attention. Each, the way people react are still unique to even that family and even within families, there's different cultural differences, right?
That you're 65 year old just because you have a 65 year old and a 20 year old with the same last name and the same D and similar DNA, you know, that 20 year old might have more of a cultural similarities with another 20 year old from a different ethnicity, right? So it's so many things that you have to learn, you know, in that moment or that's important to keep understanding and just, you know, I think to me not labeling if you see something happen, that's not something that your culture or you're familiar with, like you mentioned, you know, an emotional, you know, situation that this is, everyone greaves differently, everyone handles everything differently and in people within certain ethnicities, cultures still handle differently from others in that. And I think you guys did a good job when you trained, you know, so of course we met a couple of times on virtually and then in person and I think your training hits that point home really well. I remember one point in the training that we talked about, you know, have you ever had these things happen and knowing that again, how different, like how many people that you weren't expecting a lot of similarities with, how similar you were and then vice versa, right?
So it's, I thought it was a fantastic training and something that would be a huge positive impact to every agency, every organization. Yeah, it's a nail biting experience. Most people assume as a facilitator of DNI specifically that you are an expert and that you've kind of mastered your own thoughts and opinions and ideas and you've mastered your own emotions and you have it, we do a lot of you need to unpack your own stuff before you get on that stage in a sense. And then you find things that come up that you're like, I did not know that was something that I would kind of latch on to mentally or emotionally.
I'm going to have to, you know, kind of do some work on the back end after this training. And I think that's the beauty of the training that was curated specifically for LOPA is that there's so much flexibility that it can go where it needs to go. We know that for some people that they're going to default to the negative parts of the conversation because in very similar to Oregon donation will default to those negative pieces because that's how we've kind of been hardwired, I.E. raised and it's that awareness and that constant touch point and ongoing conversation as I like to say, it's a marathon, not a sprint because it's a sprints when that person's organs now need to be donated and we're at the critical hour.
Whereas if we can start that marathon conversation, once we get to that, this is the last leg I used to run track, but I wasn't good at it at all. Last leg, the four by four, right? And you're like, given it all you got and you're trying to get to the finish line and you want this family, you want the very best of this family and you know the gift of giving life would change their life, even in their grief. It would transform their grief from a thing of sorrow that they can't move past to.
There was even a greater purpose that my loved ones served by being able to donate their organs or tissue. It's like having that starting that conversation now is so important. And it got me to thinking about activism. We live in a world that we love to kind of pick up issues and like give it all we got.
And if I believe if we had, and again, just my opinion, if we gave the level of attention and I would use a provocative word activism to organ donation, I think we could change it, especially from the minority perspective, how often people sign up to give. I think it takes some activism of us getting out there. It's always easier when you have people that look like you, that have had similar experiences as you, that have lived similar, similarly to you or their backgrounds. You're more likely to kind of listen in even more closely because you're like, you know what, I have a foundation with them.
I feel like there's a built in relationship. And I'm glad that you shared your story. We believe that as well. And storytelling is really big in our education community.
And without giving away too many trade secrets because I know you have a business to run. And I know that we focused on LOPA, but we get some focus groups, one of which I think we all have set in. And you don't know what you're going into. And you know, it's like a little nerve wracking.
Am I going to get the answers right? I don't know. But then I just love the way you guys did it because I felt comfortable there. I can answer these questions.
And questions, I didn't know that you would throw at us. Like, you know, odd questions out there. Like, okay, I kind of see where we're going here. And then you streamline the training.
Is that how you do that? You get a feel for what it is? Yeah. So we go in with an open mind.
I mean, the shell makes things a little bit easier. So we have some things as far as definitions. So the diversity, equity, inclusion, even the equality definition kind of needed to be hardwired in there. But the focus groups give us insight of what are the pain points that people are feeling that they're not saying in everyday life, that they're not sharing with HR or with their direct supervisor.
And sometimes you're like, I just want to do my job. I don't really want to get into these pieces. But what we're learning, especially over the past probably five to 10 years, is that we have hired one person with one brain. So the idea or the philosophy of they need to leave part of themselves at home to do this work doesn't work because we hired an entire person with an entire brain.
So they need a safe space or an appropriate way in which they can share those things. So that's probably our biggest piece. We ask really broad questions on purpose. You don't feel like you're being led anywhere.
What I thought is Mr. Ronnie? Yeah. I thought he was great.
You just made me feel comfortable. Like, come on, man. What do you want to know? I'm going to tell you right now.
I'm glad we got this on Tastake. I'll go. You did an early great job with that. And then how do you measure success from you as an agency?
And then I guess, Joey, you could do LOPA as an agency. Once you go through all of this and it's there like a time frame in there or like you said, it's a marathon. It's actually building the relationship. So what we have come to know over time is that this is hard work.
It does burn you out, which is why we took some time. It's like we just need a week of not facilitating diversity inclusion topics because it is exhausting even from our perspective. And we don't believe in what we call one-offs with this type of work in any of our work, but specifically diversity inclusion, which means just come in, do this training. We don't really want any feedback from our front line.
We don't want feedback from our manager to supervisors. So we can check this box and say we've done X, Y, and Z. And LOPA did not do that. So the fact that we are now reviewing policies and procedures, you know, is there anything that we're missing as an organization, let's create coaching avenues and career development.
Like that's what happens when you start looking at equity within an organization is that it as you said, it comes from the ground up. And I think that's probably the most exciting piece. Y'all are probably one of our, I probably shouldn't say this, but I'm going to say it. On record, one of my favorite clients to work with because of your willingness to just do the hard stuff and you know it's going to be uncomfortable, but you're still willing to put in the work so that your individual contributors, as I like to say, are also willing to put in the hard work.
And you mentioned from our perspective, timeframes and things. And for me, it's never ending. Right? It's not like a finite time frame.
It's not like you mentioned Sprint and Marathon. It's even beyond a marathon. You know, so I think once we feel that we've done it, then we're probably further away than we were before. You know, so it's all about continuing to make progress and to always strive to be better next year than we were this year.
You know, so and you can't do that with an ending. You know, you have to continue working and building toward next year. Our leadership, yeah. Does that, yeah.
I'm just soaking it all in. Yeah. We're learning as we go. So love how you represented the Sloan group here today.
If someone's listening, they want more information, they want to learn a little bit like they may be scared to take that first step or maybe they'll message you on Facebook tonight. I don't know. Where would you send them? How can we learn more from you?
Sure. So our email address that will get us is information at theslowngroup.com and Sloan is spelled S-L-O-N-E. Really important that you don't put A in there. Okay.
Let me just fix this now. Yeah. Yeah. That's true.
And we've been getting quite a few just contacts in the past year. We're so thankful and blessed as an organization to be able to do this, continue this work throughout this year. Our hope is that it outlasts kind of this timeframe that we're in right now where everyone's highlighting diversity inclusion, but it becomes a part of our everyday conversation, very similar to organization, that it's just a natural part of who we are as human beings. And it's not something scary that we're afraid to approach.
So I want to leave you with this. Something to consider. There's a YouTube video out there called We Speak Life. It's a mini documentary.
And one of the participants actually closes with this and she says, Orrion donation is not culturally specific. It is a learned behavior. Well, Diana's is not goodbye because I will see you like next week. You'll be around, but we appreciate your time.
Thank you for continuing to help us learn. And thank you for being a guest live in the podcast studio. How exciting. Thank you.
Thank you. I appreciate it. And I had a blast today. Thank you.
Thank you. Here on the Get to Life podcast, we take a moment for mental health. Yes. And of course today's moment is going to be again with our own Nyla Schwab.
I feel like we need drum roll. Don't do that. Of course. She's of course, a member of our family services department and also recently provisional licensed professional counselor.
Big, big words there to you on. So she knows what she's talking about. I like it. I'm learning and learning.
Hey, so I thought today we're going to talk about resistance to change. And so this is something that we all know what you're talking about. I am the student here. Teach me.
I think you're resisting. I think you're resisting. So now it's right now. Okay.
Now you know, like it's that okay so to distinguish resistance and we all experience it. We all feel comfortable having a conversation or maybe it's something you have to get up and do when you feel comfortable. There is no resistance. But when you get that uncomfortable feeling that's resistance and that's where we start making choices because we don't like to feel uncomfortable.
So that's where people may avoid feeling like that. They may get busy so they don't feel like that. There's lots of ways that we can resist. So I thought to start off with we just start with the Miriam Webster definition.
Kid version makes it easier. Resistance is an act or an instance of opposing. And so the reason I thought this was a really great topic because it really holds us back in so many ways because when we resist something a lot of times we want to brush over it. But what makes our life a little bit better and how we grow is really taking time to figure out what that resistance is all about.
My resistance is always going to be different than what you're resisting against. And you know, one thing that's constant is change and resistance is fuel. So I guess there's a saying that says people don't resist change. They resist being changed.
I see that. You're afraid. I'm not supposed to speak now. Oh, if I do this, how's that impact me?
How's that? And it really does. It turns. We have to think of course, I always think from a leader's perspective.
Okay. So I oversee the organ portion of Lopa. And as you mentioned, the only thing, you know, how constant change is it's constant in the OPO world in the donation and transplant world. And so I have to make sure when I'm addressing change, I'm addressing how it impacts each group, each person and each group because I know that that's exactly what I think about that.
Like, I know they're not really resisting that this change is going to happen. It's really about them. And I need to make sure that they understand that it's not going to change them and they're just going to change a little bit about their process. That's exactly it.
Because you know, if you think of it as a spectrum. So on one side of the spectrum is when you're forced to change, it's just pushed on. You're like what you're talking about. It could be like that.
If you don't give any thought to what that change and how it's going to impact other people. And the other one is we get excited sometimes when it's our choice to change. Maybe it's a new haircut. Maybe it's a tattoo buying a new house, you can be a little nervous, but you're excited about that change.
But then there's this one in between where it's that change is just overdue, but yet we're not ready for it. So I've got to give myself a pep talk sometimes. I get the sweaty palms and like, hard starts right. Come on, come on, come on.
And it could be the simplest thing. Something dealing with my kids. And that's hard. Like I don't want anything to change for them.
But sometimes like to get over that hump like, it's hard. It's hard. And that's when we kind of talk about there's kind of three options of change. So when you have change coming at you can ignore it.
And let's do that. You feel that nudge. You feel that discomfort and you just kind of push it off and you just keep going. And that's where people can get into insomnia, ulcers, lots of things because you internalize that, right?
It can also lead to loneliness because you don't, things are going on with your emotions that you don't understand it, but it's because you're resisting. There's a saying that says, change before you have to or it'll hit you like an actor. Yeah. Yeah.
So that's what you don't want to do is to just ignore it. Then there's the freak out and react. And that's kind of like you. Just pointing at me.
Sometimes we get this feeling like maybe we had these internal system of telling us we need to change because nature, we're always changing. Like you said, Joey, everything's changing. So when you have that, sometimes people get that feeling and it's uncomfortable. So they just go big.
So maybe you're getting this change. Like I need to change careers. Instead you just quit your job instead of maybe thinking about changing positions within your job. So that's that kind of freak out react mode.
And then there's another one that says just kind of embrace the change. And with that, when I say embrace or accept the change, what is that like? And I can give you a great example. I remember when I was little and my dad, he was six foot something and so he took all my siblings out into the ocean with these big waves.
And when I looked up, I realized I wanted to be out there. So I start pushing through and I was kind of tiny, short and these waves just took me out. And so if you think about the obstacles, that's an obstacle and I was going against it. So eventually I just have to give up.
So I go back in and I'm real upset and my mom said, don't fight the waves. And so she taught me to dive under the waves. And so I went back out and then I would go under. Yeah.
And I got to my dad. I was out of breath. I was like, that's just it. When we have that uncomfortable feeling, it's kind of taking time.
So taking a step back, it doesn't have to be a rush. It can be about something people are talking about like Diane's talking about when it comes to race or culture, diversity, having these conversations. It can be grief when you're walking through these stages and people say something that really is hurtful and you have this resistance to be angry. It's when you feel that you don't have to do an immediate reaction, but just kind of step back, you can pull people in to get a different perspective.
And then you can also just take some time to think about it. And then the third thing that you really want to do is to respond appropriately. We have a choice to resistance and it's what do you want to do with that resistance. And so that's really what it's all about.
So we want to always be growing and changing. And when there's change, there's loss and we need to be gentle on ourselves. And sometimes people think, well, I'm going to make this choice to go do my new house, but you're still saying goodbye to the old house. Joey, you just moved.
Yeah. I've been there for almost 15 years and had many of my neighbors who we are close friends. So it was a tough thing. Of course, like you said, I'm really excited about the new spot and the new neighborhood that we're living in, new friends that will hopefully meet some.
I actually work here at LOPA that I already have known for some time, but then there's so many others that are there that I can't wait to meet and start that new journey, especially with my new baby and my big one-year-old money. He's embracing it. He's embracing it. You're finding the pros, the cons, you're taking time to say goodbye and to make those changes.
And Laura, you just had one of your babies, you're an year older. Yeah, we're transitioning to high school. I'm trying to be cool, which the kids don't say cool anymore, which makes me say it more for whatever reason. But I'm trying to be cool and let her be herself and not easy.
So that's why I'm glad Nyla's in the office with me because counseling for free, right? I'm there. I'm there with you. Great topic, great topic, lots of things to think about.
Maybe you have a topic you'd like us to cover here on The Gifted Life. All you have to do is shoot us an email, info at thegiftedlife.org. In our question and answer segment, Lori, this question is for you. I've been told that my religion doesn't support donation.
How do I find out for sure? Ooh, I get that question a lot. And then lately it's been with the younger audience, which is interesting. But I can tell you this, all major religions in the United States support organization.
They see as a final act of love and generosity towards others and active charity, really, which is what our discussions turn to. But if you go to lopa.org slash clergy, this is a great resource, lopa.org slash clergy. You can read more about it. And there is a click here, religion and donation.
When you click on that from that page, it lists all the religions Catholicism, Islam, Judaism, all of that there. And it kind of walks you through the donation process and how they feel towards donation. So that's a really great resource as well and great question. Oh, and Lori, you can also reach out to your spiritual leaders.
Everyone I've ever come across has always been very open to talk about their beliefs. Right? So if you have any questions, please give us a call at 504-648-3477. We'd love to hear from you.
In every episode of The Gifted Life, we honor a hero. Today's hero is Dolfi Alexi Jr. We learn about Dolfi from his family. Dolfi had turned 16 just eight days before his accident.
He recently mentioned to his grandfather that when he got his license, he'd like to be an organ donor. We honored his wish and although our prayers were not answered, the prayers of four other families were answered that day. He lives on through them and is forever a hero. And now we pause and say thank you to Dolfi for the gift of life.
And that will do it for episode 165 of The Gifted Life. Thanks for listening guys and remember you can register anytime as an organ, eye and tissue donor at registerme.org. Big thank you to Diane Jackson of the Sloan group for coming in in studio and hanging out with us for almost an hour. And certainly thanks for her and her group for helping us hardwire such an important program into the fabric of low-pot equity diversity inclusion.
So big thanks to her for both of those things. How great was she? Oh wow. We couldn't really say goodbye.
Yeah. She'll be back. The best place to find us guys is at our website, thegiftedlife.org. You can listen to us there and you can find links to listen on Apple Podcasts, Google Podcasts, Spotify, iHeartRadio, or wherever you listen to podcasts.
And if you listen on Apple Podcasts, please give us a five-star rating. It really helps others find our podcast. And we'd really appreciate it. On social guys, our Facebook is the Gifted Life podcast, Twitter and Instagram at Gifted Life Pod.
Again, thanks for listening. We hope that you go out and do something you wouldn't normally do to help us make life happen. We're one big team. Until next time.
This is a production of LOPA, or the Louisiana Organ Procurement Agency. The Gifted Life is hosted by Lori Steele, Joey Buudrow and Sarah Blakemore, our executive producer is Kirsten Heins. Producer is Shalom Caraway. Intern is Rebecca Rannam and we are recorded, engineered and mixed in our Covington Louisiana Studio by Troy Perez.