Fangle Dooble Dozer

Fangle Dooble dozer S.J.Simpson It’s a fangle dooble dozer Said Lilly to Rosa The Stephens they did not agree I think it’s a thaw ump Or a digeree dee thump But it comes right up to my knee The one in the middle Said the boy with the fiddle Away in a world of his own He played with such glee Until quarter past three It’s a shame you can’t bow a trombone! My cousin Paul’s not my cousin at all He’s a friend I met at a wake We giggle at death and poor Uncle Geoff Who like a stripper, popped out of the cake! And old Bobby’s like Dobby He surfs for a hobby Spends hours just looking for porn He’s got the best package Which included a snackage He’s a veggie so it’s probably just quorn If he eats the whole thing he might end up in Tring But he ended his days down in France. Oh no he’s not dead He’s with Sister Fred A nun who wears men’s underpants. She got up to pray at seven today She worships a God made of cheese, She used to be catholic I think she’s allergic, The smell of incense makes her sneeze. In the name of the Gowder The stinking bishop has power The big cheddar, the edam, the brie. She went to confession to atone of her sinning Because she loved a pirate called Smee. But Father Mcsharry Was dreaming of Barry When poor Sister Fred Spilled the beans. Just pick up the can It’s a Heinz 56 ! You’re missing a flavour it seems! I’m in love with a man With a bright orange tan And a moustache he paints on with ink He’s not got much of a brain He might be insane He calls himself Ethel I think? He smells like a bakery He loves buns and pastries His favourites are pasties from Greggs But I’d prefer a nice truffle Or a cocktail with Russel But I might lose control of my legs. There’s my new friend called James Who’s taken the blame For my lack of decorum on trains I swear it’s tourettes But I break into sweats I think that I’ve broken my brain But the moral of the tale Is that nothings for sale When your friends are as nuts as a scrotum And I think you’re the best But I’ll be better with rest I’m like a bear who’s missing his Totum POLE.