Forthcomingness

On conquering the fear of being known. Men often have a hard time opening up to their partners about what’s happening for them internally. Anxiety, fear, and other similar emotions are scary for men to face alone, let alone in the presence of others. So, too often, they decide to bottle these feelings up instead of trusting their partner to see them and love them in all their vulnerability. Although it may be uncomfortable to share deeply and openly with your partner, a much larger pain is incurred by withholding emotional pain and hardship. Men only end up hurting themselves and their relationships by choosing not to be forthcoming with their life partners. Listen to this episode of The Crux to hear Ryan and Slade discuss the importance of intentional, actionable forthcomingness in relationships, and some practices you can start applying to your own life. SHOW NOTES: 00:51 – Ryan and Slade introduce the concept of forthcomingness as a daily practice 01:33 – Slade discusses how being physically present with your partner isn’t enough 03:58 – Men aren’t conscious of how their tendency to withhold and withdraw affects their partners 05:19 – The shadow-parent: Projecting old parental wounds onto our partners 07:59 – Recognizing a lack of forthcomingness can open the door to healing 09:02 – Reconditioning your daily practices to invite honesty and openness 10:39 – Ryan shares a personal story about engaging in forthcomingness with his partner 15:21 – Slade discusses the importance of intention and awareness in forthcomingness 19:38 – Intimacy falters when one partner isn’t open to being known